My wife likes lifetime fitness, but it's costly... We have two gym memberships

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she’s going every other day for half the day (2 hours in childcare plus swimming) you’re asking her to massively cut her QOL and alter her daily routine, all to save 2% of your income. Get over it and save money somewhere else.

+1. Price out 1/2 day childcare for 4 days a week and compare lifetime to *that*, not to the Y across from your job.

The y is 5 minutes from the new house. Lifetime is 25 and requires the expressway almost the entire trip.

This doesn't matter. 25 minutes on the expressway for 4 hours of childcare is still worth much, much more than 5 minutes to a place she won't go.

You don't seem to care that this is a huge value to your wife and kids, because you aren't enjoying it with them. Sit with that: you'd rather their lives were objectively worse so long as you win on some meaningless point. Good job?

You can have up to 3 hours, not 4.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she’s going every other day for half the day (2 hours in childcare plus swimming) you’re asking her to massively cut her QOL and alter her daily routine, all to save 2% of your income. Get over it and save money somewhere else.

+1. Price out 1/2 day childcare for 4 days a week and compare lifetime to *that*, not to the Y across from your job.

The y is 5 minutes from the new house. Lifetime is 25 and requires the expressway almost the entire trip.

This doesn't matter. 25 minutes on the expressway for 4 hours of childcare is still worth much, much more than 5 minutes to a place she won't go.

You don't seem to care that this is a huge value to your wife and kids, because you aren't enjoying it with them. Sit with that: you'd rather their lives were objectively worse so long as you win on some meaningless point. Good job?

You can have up to 3 hours, not 4.

Way to miss the point op.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We belong to Life Time, and I also have a Retro Fitness membership. My husband, a wiser man than you, is happy to spend $300/mo for my a$$ to look like it does.

Her a$$ looks amazing no matter what she does orange theory, baree, hot yoga. She has done it all. It would look good without the gym. She's naturally fit. She doesn't do cardio, just stretching and weights. I think most of the time, she's in the locker room in the hot tub, showering and blow-drying her hair.

I don’t get why you’re penny pinching on this. She looks great (including her hair) and is getting a break from the kids, for an incredibly cheap price. What is your income that this is really bothering you??

We will be paying a mortgage in a few months, so expenses will be much higher. Our income is 140k + 17 k bonus. My wife keeps all her salary as she only makes about $900 monthly. She works once a week.

So let her devote half her salary to this and you just pay for the Y. I don't see the problem.

I'm not the type to allow that. Paying half her salary for a gym membership. I would feel bad to allow that. She saves most and spends some on clothes or salon appointments.

That’s incredibly disrespectful to your wife, op. I was a SAHM when my kids were little, but if my dh felt he could “allow” me to spend or not spend money on something, well, let’s just say I’m not sure we’d still be married at this point.

It seems clear this is a high value item to your wife. You’re trying to win a battle and your going to lose the war. If she wants to put half her salary towards this, that’s her decision, not yours. You need to find your humility here and defer to your wife. She has to have agency in this marriage.

[Anonymous]

Well paying child support and then paying for your own living arrangements is going to cost you way more than this gym membership. Because that is where you are going to be headed if you keep acting like a little kid instead of adult husband and father.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We belong to Life Time, and I also have a Retro Fitness membership. My husband, a wiser man than you, is happy to spend $300/mo for my a$$ to look like it does.

Her a$$ looks amazing no matter what she does orange theory, baree, hot yoga. She has done it all. It would look good without the gym. She's naturally fit. She doesn't do cardio, just stretching and weights. I think most of the time, she's in the locker room in the hot tub, showering and blow-drying her hair.

I don’t get why you’re penny pinching on this. She looks great (including her hair) and is getting a break from the kids, for an incredibly cheap price. What is your income that this is really bothering you??

Men hate when women enjoy things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We belong to Life Time, and I also have a Retro Fitness membership. My husband, a wiser man than you, is happy to spend $300/mo for my a$$ to look like it does.

Her a$$ looks amazing no matter what she does orange theory, baree, hot yoga. She has done it all. It would look good without the gym. She's naturally fit. She doesn't do cardio, just stretching and weights. I think most of the time, she's in the locker room in the hot tub, showering and blow-drying her hair.

I don’t get why you’re penny pinching on this. She looks great (including her hair) and is getting a break from the kids, for an incredibly cheap price. What is your income that this is really bothering you??

We will be paying a mortgage in a few months, so expenses will be much higher. Our income is 140k + 17 k bonus. My wife keeps all her salary as she only makes about $900 monthly. She works once a week.

So let her devote half her salary to this and you just pay for the Y. I don't see the problem.

I'm not the type to allow that. Paying half her salary for a gym membership. I would feel bad to allow that. She saves most and spends some on clothes or salon appointments.

You are a make chauvinist pig that would rather be proud than “allow” your wife to break up her days with the kids as you insist you break yo yours. I’m sure in a couple years, she will take her hot body and leave you for a man who doesn’t treat her so badly.

[Anonymous]

I loved lifetime too and bc I loved it, I went. It's too easy to let a gym membership go unused. At least she's going. However are the kids using the gym or just attending the childcare? If it's just childcare, I think that charge is wrong. Also I thought there were family rates?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your kids would be watching more tv if she didn't take them to lifetime. How else would hair look nice?

Eh, they likely have a TV on at the gym childcare too

[Anonymous]

If she’s using it that much, it’s a totally reasonable price.

[Anonymous]

You sound cheap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Buy a pair of running shoes. $150 every few months is cheaper than a monthly gym membership.

But there are no towels or other womens to pal around with

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We belong to Life Time, and I also have a Retro Fitness membership. My husband, a wiser man than you, is happy to spend $300/mo for my a$$ to look like it does.

Her a$$ looks amazing no matter what she does orange theory, baree, hot yoga. She has done it all. It would look good without the gym. She's naturally fit. She doesn't do cardio, just stretching and weights. I think most of the time, she's in the locker room in the hot tub, showering and blow-drying her hair.

I don’t get why you’re penny pinching on this. She looks great (including her hair) and is getting a break from the kids, for an incredibly cheap price. What is your income that this is really bothering you??

We will be paying a mortgage in a few months, so expenses will be much higher. Our income is 140k + 17 k bonus. My wife keeps all her salary as she only makes about $900 monthly. She works once a week.

So let her devote half her salary to this and you just pay for the Y. I don't see the problem.

I'm not the type to allow that. Paying half her salary for a gym membership. I would feel bad to allow that. She saves most and spends some on clothes or salon appointments.

Allow that? If you don't 'allow that', be man enough to allot $300/month for the family gym membership and shut up.

He sounds like an immigrant and English may not be his first language. Have some grace.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like she is doing it primarily to hand the kids off to someone else for a few hours, not to keep her ass looking good.

Maybe guilt her over that?

[Anonymous]

This is not the hill you want to die on. Keep lifetime and keep the spouse bonus points.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is doing it primarily to hand the kids off to someone else for a few hours, not to keep her ass looking good.

Maybe guilt her over that?

What's wrong with that?