Waiting for marriage

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I waited. It was hard to find someone - though the man I married is kind, highly intelligent, family-focused and very funny. We are both very devout. We are both very happy with our sex life (if you wait long enough you never take sex for granted!)

+1. This is my experience as well—except I had had sex before, but was celibate for years until the wedding night. It weeded out a lot of guys until I found a great one.

We’re the men you married virgins? We’re they very religious?

[Anonymous]

I know someone who did. She was so happy she found a handsome guy who wanted to wait too. They married a year after meeting.Turns out he wanted to wait because he had a severe case of erectile dysfunction. They are now divorced with 2 kids.

If you love sex, taste the goods before you sign the contract.

[Anonymous]

I've never had to wait 6 months. But I don't think I have ever had casual sex, like you put it.

I have only had sex while exclusive and dating for a while(1- 3 months?). I think there is a good option between no sex before marriage/ 6 month wait and casual sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know someone who did. She was so happy she found a handsome guy who wanted to wait too. They married a year after meeting.Turns out he wanted to wait because he had a severe case of erectile dysfunction. They are now divorced with 2 kids.

If you love sex, taste the goods before you sign the contract.

You do realize thousands of people who have sex before marriage face the same issue and have the same result

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated my college sweetheart for several years and married him when I was 25. Both of us were virgins on our wedding night. Happily married for 35 years now. I think that waiting for sex till we were 25 made us appreciative of sex and we both have high libido.

Contrary to popular opinion, not having had sex with other people did not hamper us. We are self-taught (duh... not rocket science), adventurous, curious, high libido and we came into the marriage without any baggage. In fact I am shocked to discover on DCUM that people go years in a marriage without having sex!!

We have a great, uninhibited sex life even now. Maybe all the sexual deprivation of early years have made a life-long impact. Anyways, knowing that neither of us had other sexual partners or will have other sexual partners is very comforting and frankly a confidence booster - especially since our bodies change due to pregnancies and aging.

do you orgasm?

Why wouldn't she just because she didn't have sex before marriage? What a stupid comment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know someone who did. She was so happy she found a handsome guy who wanted to wait too. They married a year after meeting.Turns out he wanted to wait because he had a severe case of erectile dysfunction. They are now divorced with 2 kids.

If you love sex, taste the goods before you sign the contract.

You do realize thousands of people who have sex before marriage face the same issue and have the same result

Of course, but it's different when you don't trick someone. And it's different going in when things are working and then facing the problem together.

[Anonymous]

You're not going to get much real advice here,OP just a lot of I'd never do that , gotta test drive the car and tales of friends who married gay and impotent men.

I think you have to sort out why you want to wait.

Do you want to wait until your exclusive feel like you know the guy pretty well and feel comfortable discussing intimate things with him?

Do you want to wait because you just feel sex is for marriage?

You don't have to have casual sex if you don't want to and it can help weed out guys who only want sex.

I have only had sex with my husband who I met at 38. He was a few years younger than me and also a virgin. I don't have any complaints about sex and from what I gather I have what a lot of women long for with their husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know someone who did. She was so happy she found a handsome guy who wanted to wait too. They married a year after meeting.Turns out he wanted to wait because he had a severe case of erectile dysfunction. They are now divorced with 2 kids.

If you love sex, taste the goods before you sign the contract.

You do realize thousands of people who have sex before marriage face the same issue and have the same result

Of course, but it's different when you don't trick someone. And it's different going in when things are working and then facing the problem together.

Is it?
Because the end result is the same.

But I realize you're a firm believer in having sex before marriage which is fine.
But your scare tactic stories are silly and just as bad as the stories nuns used to tell to scare teens from masturbating and sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated my college sweetheart for several years and married him when I was 25. Both of us were virgins on our wedding night. Happily married for 35 years now. I think that waiting for sex till we were 25 made us appreciative of sex and we both have high libido.

Contrary to popular opinion, not having had sex with other people did not hamper us. We are self-taught (duh... not rocket science), adventurous, curious, high libido and we came into the marriage without any baggage. In fact I am shocked to discover on DCUM that people go years in a marriage without having sex!!

We have a great, uninhibited sex life even now. Maybe all the sexual deprivation of early years have made a life-long impact. Anyways, knowing that neither of us had other sexual partners or will have other sexual partners is very comforting and frankly a confidence booster - especially since our bodies change due to pregnancies and aging.

do you orgasm?

Why wouldn't she just because she didn't have sex before marriage? What a stupid comment

does the question imply she would not? I just happen to ask, if so, her marriage is perfect … jumpy beans

[Anonymous]

I think it’s really difficult to find a guy who will go for waiting unless there’s 1) strong religious reasons, 2) Some problem related to sex that it’s much better to know about beforehand

In short, l would be suspicious of any non-religious guy (or similarly culturally conservative background) who is ok with waiting for marriage.

[Anonymous]

you can wait … or not … none of it guarantees your relationship or marriage will be successful, the results are all over the place, my dh and his ex-gf did wait for 6 months and they knew each other before that for several years, they broke up after few years, got back together after several months and spent few more years in long distance and then split for good, each found someone else … I know tens of stories like this, lots of these relationships that were clearly serious, not at all casual sex, did not last, and only very few college sweethearts did end up together, I cannot even remember any but for sure there should one or two

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated my college sweetheart for several years and married him when I was 25. Both of us were virgins on our wedding night. Happily married for 35 years now. I think that waiting for sex till we were 25 made us appreciative of sex and we both have high libido.

Contrary to popular opinion, not having had sex with other people did not hamper us. We are self-taught (duh... not rocket science), adventurous, curious, high libido and we came into the marriage without any baggage. In fact I am shocked to discover on DCUM that people go years in a marriage without having sex!!

We have a great, uninhibited sex life even now. Maybe all the sexual deprivation of early years have made a life-long impact. Anyways, knowing that neither of us had other sexual partners or will have other sexual partners is very comforting and frankly a confidence booster - especially since our bodies change due to pregnancies and aging.

do you orgasm?

Why wouldn't she just because she didn't have sex before marriage? What a stupid comment

does the question imply she would not? I just happen to ask, if so, her marriage is perfect … jumpy beans

You were looking for a gotcha to see waiting is bad

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never had “casual” sex as in a ONS and I always took my time getting to know someone first. I had four partners over about six years before my DH and it really helped me understand what I was looking for in that aspect of a relationship. Some men are takers, others are givers. Some will work hard to really please you and others just want to be pleased. While my sample size was pretty small it really helped me out so when I started having sex with my now DH I realized that this guy really gets it. Those prior experiences also gave me good insight into what men like which on reflection is pretty obvious.

? 5 is not a small number.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never had “casual” sex as in a ONS and I always took my time getting to know someone first. I had four partners over about six years before my DH and it really helped me understand what I was looking for in that aspect of a relationship. Some men are takers, others are givers. Some will work hard to really please you and others just want to be pleased. While my sample size was pretty small it really helped me out so when I started having sex with my now DH I realized that this guy really gets it. Those prior experiences also gave me good insight into what men like which on reflection is pretty obvious.

? 5 is not a small number.

5 is pretty small. Very small. Anything under 10 is pretty small in terms of numbers.

And she was not referring to her number. She was referring to a sample size of 5 (which is applied generally to men), which is a tiny sample size. You don't understand scientific terms.

And you also don't understand that many people have more than 5 partners...and that is not a lot compared to A LOT of people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone here wait til marriage to have sex? Or date for at least 6 months before having sex? Tell me about it? Will I ever find a partner if I don’t want to have casual sex?

Do you know what casual sex is? That is like random one night stands. Having sex with a boyfriend is not casual sex. I would not be with a man who was okay waiting 6 months unless you are both very religious. Otherwise, it is not a good idea at all.