Do you consider ADHD "special needs"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Neurotypical” really refers to autism. People with ADHD typically don’t have the same issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships, and don’t have the very different type of information processing and way of seeing the world as kids with autism. I don’t think it’s correct to lump them together.

Now somebody will say “it’s all on a spectrum!”. OK fine but then none of this has any meaning.

No it doesn’t just refer to autism. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurodiversity

Yeah that’s the watered down “everyone is special” version. Pretty useless.

You don’t have to like the term, but the definition of the term is not limited to discussions of autism. Plus, the person who coined the phrase specifically says it includes ADHD.

https://neurodiversity2.blogspot.com/p/what.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Neurotypical” really refers to autism. People with ADHD typically don’t have the same issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships, and don’t have the very different type of information processing and way of seeing the world as kids with autism. I don’t think it’s correct to lump them together.

Now somebody will say “it’s all on a spectrum!”. OK fine but then none of this has any meaning.

Many of the kids with "just" ADHD in my child's school have more issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships than the one child who I know has an ASD diagnosis.
The diagnoses are not as rigid as you think.

yeah I knew you were going to try to claim that. if you’re going to deny that the primary criteria for autism is social communication impairment, we may as well call everyone whatever we want.

What? No, but the way kids are diagnosed these days means that some kids with ADHD should really have an ASD diagnoses and some kids with ASD diagnoses may not really be on the spectrum. Sometimes it's more about what the parents are willing to accept.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Neurotypical” really refers to autism. People with ADHD typically don’t have the same issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships, and don’t have the very different type of information processing and way of seeing the world as kids with autism. I don’t think it’s correct to lump them together.

Now somebody will say “it’s all on a spectrum!”. OK fine but then none of this has any meaning.

No it doesn’t just refer to autism. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurodiversity

Yeah that’s the watered down “everyone is special” version. Pretty useless.

You don’t have to like the term, but the definition of the term is not limited to discussions of autism. Plus, the person who coined the phrase specifically says it includes ADHD.

https://neurodiversity2.blogspot.com/p/what.html

there is no scientific definition of the term. but it was originally used for autism.

[Anonymous]

My kid has dyslexia, and though he does okay in school and well in life in general I think he HAS special needs. He needs accommodations in school, audiobooks instead of paper books, etc. He needed and entirely different kind of reading instruction than his school offered. Ideally none of this would be “special,” and it would be offered to all kids. But that isn’t the world we live in, so for today his needs are special.

I’m not sure I’d call him a “special needs kid” because that seems much more…defining. And while my kid’s dyslexia is part of him it doesn’t define him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Neurotypical” really refers to autism. People with ADHD typically don’t have the same issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships, and don’t have the very different type of information processing and way of seeing the world as kids with autism. I don’t think it’s correct to lump them together.

Now somebody will say “it’s all on a spectrum!”. OK fine but then none of this has any meaning.

No it doesn’t just refer to autism. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurodiversity

Yeah that’s the watered down “everyone is special” version. Pretty useless.

You don’t have to like the term, but the definition of the term is not limited to discussions of autism. Plus, the person who coined the phrase specifically says it includes ADHD.

https://neurodiversity2.blogspot.com/p/what.html

there is no scientific definition of the term. but it was originally used for autism.

Yes that is exactly what the above article and the Wikipedia entry say.

[Anonymous]

In my experience, the answer is clearly yes. Our ADHD child needs a lot of extra support, and normal parenting techniques and the ordinary educational environment don't work in anywhere close to the same way as they do with our other children. It's obvious and significant. That said, it is in no way, shape, or form, anywhere close to the vastly more severe issues many special needs parents deal with, so its not really the same thing at all. So it depends on what you mean by the question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

Because the primary differences between the PP and the average student or worker are:

1) A parent with the time, resources, and knowledge (and interest) I strongly advocating for her child to receive extra resources and accommodations so that her child could not merely get by in school, but excel above most others.m; and

2) Access to doctors/therapists who are able to provide official diagnoses that enables advocating for special accommodations like an office in an open plan office, for example.

A person who can excel at that level does not have special needs. They have ordinary needs but, with with extra accommodation and support, can really thrive. That’s true if most people, but most people don’t get it. PP is not uniquely hindered in life. By their own acknowledgement, they can function fine without accommodation. Only very well resourced people can conceptualize special needs in this way. 99% of the population would view someone like this as typical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Neurotypical” really refers to autism. People with ADHD typically don’t have the same issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships, and don’t have the very different type of information processing and way of seeing the world as kids with autism. I don’t think it’s correct to lump them together.

Now somebody will say “it’s all on a spectrum!”. OK fine but then none of this has any meaning.

No it doesn’t just refer to autism. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurodiversity

Yeah that’s the watered down “everyone is special” version. Pretty useless.

You don’t have to like the term, but the definition of the term is not limited to discussions of autism. Plus, the person who coined the phrase specifically says it includes ADHD.

https://neurodiversity2.blogspot.com/p/what.html

there is no scientific definition of the term. but it was originally used for autism.

Yes that is exactly what the above article and the Wikipedia entry say.

from the article:

“My idea was based on a recognition that the Autistic Self-Advocacy Movement was shaping up to be the last great identity politics movement to emerge from the modernist era. I hoped it would follow in the footsteps of the Women's and Gay/Lesbian Movements.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

Because the primary differences between the PP and the average student or worker are:

1) A parent with the time, resources, and knowledge (and interest) I strongly advocating for her child to receive extra resources and accommodations so that her child could not merely get by in school, but excel above most others.m; and

2) Access to doctors/therapists who are able to provide official diagnoses that enables advocating for special accommodations like an office in an open plan office, for example.

A person who can excel at that level does not have special needs. They have ordinary needs but, with with extra accommodation and support, can really thrive. That’s true if most people, but most people don’t get it. PP is not uniquely hindered in life. By their own acknowledgement, they can function fine without accommodation. Only very well resourced people can conceptualize special needs in this way. 99% of the population would view someone like this as typical.

I agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

Because the primary differences between the PP and the average student or worker are:

1) A parent with the time, resources, and knowledge (and interest) I strongly advocating for her child to receive extra resources and accommodations so that her child could not merely get by in school, but excel above most others.m; and

2) Access to doctors/therapists who are able to provide official diagnoses that enables advocating for special accommodations like an office in an open plan office, for example.

A person who can excel at that level does not have special needs. They have ordinary needs but, with with extra accommodation and support, can really thrive. That’s true if most people, but most people don’t get it. PP is not uniquely hindered in life. By their own acknowledgement, they can function fine without accommodation. Only very well resourced people can conceptualize special needs in this way. 99% of the population would view someone like this as typical.

I agree.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

Because the primary differences between the PP and the average student or worker are:

1) A parent with the time, resources, and knowledge (and interest) I strongly advocating for her child to receive extra resources and accommodations so that her child could not merely get by in school, but excel above most others.m; and

2) Access to doctors/therapists who are able to provide official diagnoses that enables advocating for special accommodations like an office in an open plan office, for example.

A person who can excel at that level does not have special needs. They have ordinary needs but, with with extra accommodation and support, can really thrive. That’s true if most people, but most people don’t get it. PP is not uniquely hindered in life. By their own acknowledgement, they can function fine without accommodation. Only very well resourced people can conceptualize special needs in this way. 99% of the population would view someone like this as typical.

No, the primary difference between PP and the "average student or worker" are that she has learning disabilities and ADHD.

It seems like your issue is that PP got access to resources and help that others did not. I agree that is a big problem. But that doesn't mean that she didn't deserve those resources, it just means that many others don't get the resources they deserve. This is true with all instances of unearned privilege. The privileges themselves aren't the problem. The fact that others are denied them is what needs to be changed. I assume you would take no issue with PP's comment were the system to better serve those with greater impairments.

It is absolutely untrue that somebody who can excel doesn't have special needs, regardless of how 99% of the population sees them. This is the big issue with being twice exceptional. Somebody can look like they are doing okay because their intelligence seems to counteract their impairments. But without accommodations typically 2e kids (and adults) are a ball of anxiety and shame about "not reaching their potential." It isn't just about the grades or the career, it's about overall wellbeing. The idea that we should only apportion resources to help people function, not thrive, seems to dismiss the potential severe mental health consequences of being denied accommodations for ADHD or learning disabilities (although I wouldn't even say we are trying to get people to thrive, I'd say we are trying to help them lead a life that isn't substantially more difficult than the lives of neurotypical people).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Neurotypical” really refers to autism. People with ADHD typically don’t have the same issues with interpersonal relationships and friendships, and don’t have the very different type of information processing and way of seeing the world as kids with autism. I don’t think it’s correct to lump them together.

Now somebody will say “it’s all on a spectrum!”. OK fine but then none of this has any meaning.

No it doesn’t just refer to autism. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurodiversity

Yeah that’s the watered down “everyone is special” version. Pretty useless.

You don’t have to like the term, but the definition of the term is not limited to discussions of autism. Plus, the person who coined the phrase specifically says it includes ADHD.

https://neurodiversity2.blogspot.com/p/what.html

there is no scientific definition of the term. but it was originally used for autism.

Yes that is exactly what the above article and the Wikipedia entry say.

from the article:

“My idea was based on a recognition that the Autistic Self-Advocacy Movement was shaping up to be the last great identity politics movement to emerge from the modernist era. I hoped it would follow in the footsteps of the Women's and Gay/Lesbian Movements.”

Okay...but you do realize that the statement that "neurotypical really refers to autism" is not accurate? That's all I'm trying to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

Because the primary differences between the PP and the average student or worker are:

1) A parent with the time, resources, and knowledge (and interest) I strongly advocating for her child to receive extra resources and accommodations so that her child could not merely get by in school, but excel above most others.m; and

2) Access to doctors/therapists who are able to provide official diagnoses that enables advocating for special accommodations like an office in an open plan office, for example.

A person who can excel at that level does not have special needs. They have ordinary needs but, with with extra accommodation and support, can really thrive. That’s true if most people, but most people don’t get it. PP is not uniquely hindered in life. By their own acknowledgement, they can function fine without accommodation. Only very well resourced people can conceptualize special needs in this way. 99% of the population would view someone like this as typical.

No, the primary difference between PP and the "average student or worker" are that she has learning disabilities and ADHD.

It seems like your issue is that PP got access to resources and help that others did not. I agree that is a big problem. But that doesn't mean that she didn't deserve those resources, it just means that many others don't get the resources they deserve. This is true with all instances of unearned privilege. The privileges themselves aren't the problem. The fact that others are denied them is what needs to be changed. I assume you would take no issue with PP's comment were the system to better serve those with greater impairments.

It is absolutely untrue that somebody who can excel doesn't have special needs, regardless of how 99% of the population sees them. This is the big issue with being twice exceptional. Somebody can look like they are doing okay because their intelligence seems to counteract their impairments. But without accommodations typically 2e kids (and adults) are a ball of anxiety and shame about "not reaching their potential." It isn't just about the grades or the career, it's about overall wellbeing. The idea that we should only apportion resources to help people function, not thrive, seems to dismiss the potential severe mental health consequences of being denied accommodations for ADHD or learning disabilities (although I wouldn't even say we are trying to get people to thrive, I'd say we are trying to help them lead a life that isn't substantially more difficult than the lives of neurotypical people).

Everyone deserves those resources. PP got them, and I’m happy for her. But the truth is she would have been fine without them. Not extraordinary, no PhD, probably making less money in a less interesting or rewarding or comfortable job. Fine. Like everyone else.

Lots of people have learning disabilities. Lots of people have ADHD. If they are mild enough that you are okay without accommodation, there is little difference between you and a person who struggles because their parents had a messy divorce or because they are unusually sensitive. Everybody’s got problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a kid I was diagnosed with LDs. I required specialized services throughout school to help me learn. I graduated in the top 10% of my class from high school and went on to earn a PhD. That doesn’t means that I didn’t require special services to meet my needs. I used those special services to be able to attain success in school. My Mom spent a lot of time fighting for those services and providing additional supports so that I could succeed.

I was very much a special needs kid.

As an adult I was diagnosed with ADHD. It only reinforced to me how differently I see process information and respond to stimulation around me. I now understand why I get agitated in high stimulation environments and why I struggle with some regular scenarios, like in conversations where I find it hard not to interrupt and why I blurt out information. I am lucky to work in an environment where those issues have no caused me any problems and where I can make a very nice salary but I am pretty well aware that there are many environments where I would struggle. My work place has lots of open seating but they have always found a desk for me in a smaller room. They are fine with my using headphones when most people are discouraged from doing so. They have been accommodating of my quirks.

I am very much an adult with special needs.

Are my needs so great that I would be unable to function without accommodations? Probably not. Would I be in a very different place if I had not received the support I did in school or the accommodations I receive at work? Hell yeah. 100% I would have had a very different life.

There is nothing wrong with being different and knowing that you need some accommodations.

There is so much unacknowledged privilege in this comment I don't even know where to start.

This is why it is sometimes annoying when people with mild ADHD say they are special needs.

NP. I don’t understand this comment. Can you explain more?

Because the primary differences between the PP and the average student or worker are:

1) A parent with the time, resources, and knowledge (and interest) I strongly advocating for her child to receive extra resources and accommodations so that her child could not merely get by in school, but excel above most others.m; and

2) Access to doctors/therapists who are able to provide official diagnoses that enables advocating for special accommodations like an office in an open plan office, for example.

A person who can excel at that level does not have special needs. They have ordinary needs but, with with extra accommodation and support, can really thrive. That’s true if most people, but most people don’t get it. PP is not uniquely hindered in life. By their own acknowledgement, they can function fine without accommodation. Only very well resourced people can conceptualize special needs in this way. 99% of the population would view someone like this as typical.

No, the primary difference between PP and the "average student or worker" are that she has learning disabilities and ADHD.

It seems like your issue is that PP got access to resources and help that others did not. I agree that is a big problem. But that doesn't mean that she didn't deserve those resources, it just means that many others don't get the resources they deserve. This is true with all instances of unearned privilege. The privileges themselves aren't the problem. The fact that others are denied them is what needs to be changed. I assume you would take no issue with PP's comment were the system to better serve those with greater impairments.

It is absolutely untrue that somebody who can excel doesn't have special needs, regardless of how 99% of the population sees them. This is the big issue with being twice exceptional. Somebody can look like they are doing okay because their intelligence seems to counteract their impairments. But without accommodations typically 2e kids (and adults) are a ball of anxiety and shame about "not reaching their potential." It isn't just about the grades or the career, it's about overall wellbeing. The idea that we should only apportion resources to help people function, not thrive, seems to dismiss the potential severe mental health consequences of being denied accommodations for ADHD or learning disabilities (although I wouldn't even say we are trying to get people to thrive, I'd say we are trying to help them lead a life that isn't substantially more difficult than the lives of neurotypical people).

Everyone deserves those resources. PP got them, and I’m happy for her. But the truth is she would have been fine without them. Not extraordinary, no PhD, probably making less money in a less interesting or rewarding or comfortable job. Fine. Like everyone else.

Lots of people have learning disabilities. Lots of people have ADHD. If they are mild enough that you are okay without accommodation, there is little difference between you and a person who struggles because their parents had a messy divorce or because they are unusually sensitive. Everybody’s got problems.

I think people get to self identify and we shouldn’t police them. My child doesn’t have an ASD diagnosis (although it’s not out of the realm of possibility some day) but we have been given serious warning about them getting kicked out of school. At one we had to pay for a private 1:1 to keep the school from kicking us out mid-school year. It’s why we are now determined to stay in public with an IEP if at all possible. Another child we did some group therapy with “just “ has ADHD and got kicked out of two daycares by 4. His parents were terrified and frankly couldn’t afford the private pay stuff we were doing but they were desperate. I don’t actually use the term SN because it is so nebulous but if that family told me their child was SN I would not have batted an eye given the impact on the child and the family.