How Do We Fix The Mental Health Crisis Among Affluent Teens?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was reading this article in The Atlantic about the suicides at Palo Alto High School:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/12/the-silicon-valley-suicides/413140/

It seems like living in a pressure cooker full of wealthy, well-educated parents in a highly academic environment is a major factor in poor mental health among teenagers. I remember reading a sociological study showing that depression, anxiety, and drug abuse among teenagers plotted to their SES status was like a horseshoe -- most common among wealthy/UMC and poor teens (for very different reasons), but least common among the middle-middle class.

Anecdotally, from DD's private, it seems like almost half of the kids we know are on medications and see a therapist or psychiatrist on a regular basis. The stress and pressure just seem nuts to me, and the constant judgement and competition seem unhealthy for teenagers.

Are there any ways that we as parents can fix this? Pull our kids out of private and put them in an economically diverse public? Move to the Midwest? Insist that our kids don't have to take the most rigorous classes available to them? Be okay with them going to UMD or a SLAC ranked below the Top 20 rather than an Ivy? Put them in therapy with an intense cycle of medications?

I think wealthier families have the time and means to be able to diagnose their troubled kids. There are plenty of kids suffering in low in middle income families and guess what the parents don’t have the time to take off of work or the money to diagnose it and the kids know that so they just suffer through it. It doesn’t get diagnosed and added into these so called statistics.

I will add do you have any idea how long it takes to even get a diagnosis of even a learning Disability not to mention some form of depression or anxiety. It’s a long wait to even get on a wait list for psychologists that do the testing or who are willing to see new patients. That’s just for regular psychologists that don’t deal with insurance. Forget about trying to get into a psychologist that takes insurance. I have friends that tried for six months and still could not get into anyone. Guest what both families are lower income. Wealthier friends were able to pay full cost and get in sooner because they pay out of pocket to someone that does not accept insurance. Most families in the us can not afford to do that.

Therapists will happily spend their days listening to wealthy kids with ennui. A troubled kid whose parents don't have money is lucky to get any treatment let alone psychotherapy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it starts young. Child is struggling a little in school...rush to get a diagnosis and meds. Child is struggling emotionally...rush to the shrink and meds. Parents are always trying to fix things instead of being patient and teaching coping mechanisms.

You don’t think therapists teach coping mechanisms?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Poorer kids have the same mental health problems but who has money to help them? Not their parents. Also their parents are busy working just to make ends meet. My mom was a single parent who worked two jobs. My brother was very depressed and tried to commit suicide. She felt tremendous guilt that she wasn’t around enough to notice the changes in him.

Agree and this is a bullshit article written by someone who I feel doesn’t have a grasp on the realities. Wealthier kids probably have less anxiety and depression especially during the pandemic. So many middle class and lower class families had added pressures because of loss of jobs and finances. Being wealthier and having savings and a cushion to fall on took off stress on many.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mental health issues cost money. There's a reason that more rich and UMC kids are in therapy

Much of that therapy happens to be: Yeah, I can see how your parents are too busy for you.

Beware.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was reading this article in The Atlantic about the suicides at Palo Alto High School:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/12/the-silicon-valley-suicides/413140/

It seems like living in a pressure cooker full of wealthy, well-educated parents in a highly academic environment is a major factor in poor mental health among teenagers. I remember reading a sociological study showing that depression, anxiety, and drug abuse among teenagers plotted to their SES status was like a horseshoe -- most common among wealthy/UMC and poor teens (for very different reasons), but least common among the middle-middle class.

Anecdotally, from DD's private, it seems like almost half of the kids we know are on medications and see a therapist or psychiatrist on a regular basis. The stress and pressure just seem nuts to me, and the constant judgement and competition seem unhealthy for teenagers.

Are there any ways that we as parents can fix this? Pull our kids out of private and put them in an economically diverse public? Move to the Midwest? Insist that our kids don't have to take the most rigorous classes available to them? Be okay with them going to UMD or a SLAC ranked below the Top 20 rather than an Ivy? Put them in therapy with an intense cycle of medications?

OMFG.

First, my middle class kid is in an economically diverse public and he is in an intensive outpatient program. So, not having your kid go to school with poor kids isn’t going to help.

Second, wtf, UMD is really hard to get into. Stop assuming it’s a safety for your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it starts young. Child is struggling a little in school...rush to get a diagnosis and meds. Child is struggling emotionally...rush to the shrink and meds. Parents are always trying to fix things instead of being patient and teaching coping mechanisms.

+ 1,000. The kneejerk reaction to get drugged is uniquely American. Many of these drugs actually INCREASE suicidal tendencies. But parents often ignore the tiny print warnings provided by big pharma and mandated by federal law.

The drug pushing by pharmaceutical corporations and the AMA is egregious. People who invest in this scam are ruthless.

Have you actually compared the data to kids that needs meds and don’t get it to kids that get meds?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was reading this article in The Atlantic about the suicides at Palo Alto High School:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/12/the-silicon-valley-suicides/413140/

It seems like living in a pressure cooker full of wealthy, well-educated parents in a highly academic environment is a major factor in poor mental health among teenagers. I remember reading a sociological study showing that depression, anxiety, and drug abuse among teenagers plotted to their SES status was like a horseshoe -- most common among wealthy/UMC and poor teens (for very different reasons), but least common among the middle-middle class.

Anecdotally, from DD's private, it seems like almost half of the kids we know are on medications and see a therapist or psychiatrist on a regular basis. The stress and pressure just seem nuts to me, and the constant judgement and competition seem unhealthy for teenagers.

Are there any ways that we as parents can fix this? Pull our kids out of private and put them in an economically diverse public? Move to the Midwest? Insist that our kids don't have to take the most rigorous classes available to them? Be okay with them going to UMD or a SLAC ranked below the Top 20 rather than an Ivy? Put them in therapy with an intense cycle of medications?

I think wealthier families have the time and means to be able to diagnose their troubled kids. There are plenty of kids suffering in low in middle income families and guess what the parents don’t have the time to take off of work or the money to diagnose it and the kids know that so they just suffer through it. It doesn’t get diagnosed and added into these so called statistics.

I will add do you have any idea how long it takes to even get a diagnosis of even a learning Disability not to mention some form of depression or anxiety. It’s a long wait to even get on a wait list for psychologists that do the testing or who are willing to see new patients. That’s just for regular psychologists that don’t deal with insurance. Forget about trying to get into a psychologist that takes insurance. I have friends that tried for six months and still could not get into anyone. Guest what both families are lower income. Wealthier friends were able to pay full cost and get in sooner because they pay out of pocket to someone that does not accept insurance. Most families in the us can not afford to do that.

Therapists will happily spend their days listening to wealthy kids with ennui. A troubled kid whose parents don't have money is lucky to get any treatment let alone psychotherapy

Exactly this so many lower and middle income Kids are not getting diagnosed. They don’t have the resources to even get an appointment and certainly can’t afford to take off work weekly to take their child. They are doing their best and it is sad but I am most certain anxiety and depression are much higher in lower income kids that are not even being diagnosed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was reading this article in The Atlantic about the suicides at Palo Alto High School:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/12/the-silicon-valley-suicides/413140/

It seems like living in a pressure cooker full of wealthy, well-educated parents in a highly academic environment is a major factor in poor mental health among teenagers. I remember reading a sociological study showing that depression, anxiety, and drug abuse among teenagers plotted to their SES status was like a horseshoe -- most common among wealthy/UMC and poor teens (for very different reasons), but least common among the middle-middle class.

Anecdotally, from DD's private, it seems like almost half of the kids we know are on medications and see a therapist or psychiatrist on a regular basis. The stress and pressure just seem nuts to me, and the constant judgement and competition seem unhealthy for teenagers.

Are there any ways that we as parents can fix this? Pull our kids out of private and put them in an economically diverse public? Move to the Midwest? Insist that our kids don't have to take the most rigorous classes available to them? Be okay with them going to UMD or a SLAC ranked below the Top 20 rather than an Ivy? Put them in therapy with an intense cycle of medications?

I think wealthier families have the time and means to be able to diagnose their troubled kids. There are plenty of kids suffering in low in middle income families and guess what the parents don’t have the time to take off of work or the money to diagnose it and the kids know that so they just suffer through it. It doesn’t get diagnosed and added into these so called statistics.

I will add do you have any idea how long it takes to even get a diagnosis of even a learning Disability not to mention some form of depression or anxiety. It’s a long wait to even get on a wait list for psychologists that do the testing or who are willing to see new patients. That’s just for regular psychologists that don’t deal with insurance. Forget about trying to get into a psychologist that takes insurance. I have friends that tried for six months and still could not get into anyone. Guest what both families are lower income. Wealthier friends were able to pay full cost and get in sooner because they pay out of pocket to someone that does not accept insurance. Most families in the us can not afford to do that.

This. The wealthy kids are the ones who can get treatment and diagnosis, op.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was reading this article in The Atlantic about the suicides at Palo Alto High School:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/12/the-silicon-valley-suicides/413140/

It seems like living in a pressure cooker full of wealthy, well-educated parents in a highly academic environment is a major factor in poor mental health among teenagers. I remember reading a sociological study showing that depression, anxiety, and drug abuse among teenagers plotted to their SES status was like a horseshoe -- most common among wealthy/UMC and poor teens (for very different reasons), but least common among the middle-middle class.

Anecdotally, from DD's private, it seems like almost half of the kids we know are on medications and see a therapist or psychiatrist on a regular basis. The stress and pressure just seem nuts to me, and the constant judgement and competition seem unhealthy for teenagers.

Are there any ways that we as parents can fix this? Pull our kids out of private and put them in an economically diverse public? Move to the Midwest? Insist that our kids don't have to take the most rigorous classes available to them? Be okay with them going to UMD or a SLAC ranked below the Top 20 rather than an Ivy? Put them in therapy with an intense cycle of medications?

OMFG.

First, my middle class kid is in an economically diverse public and he is in an intensive outpatient program. So, not having your kid go to school with poor kids isn’t going to help.

Second, wtf, UMD is really hard to get into. Stop assuming it’s a safety for your kid.

Op is a total troll. Seriously. The Midwest had major issues with opioids and heroin so I wouldn’t say Midwest is a safe haven.

[Anonymous]

Lol! These kids are not getting into UMD or Bryan Mar try Salisbury and Ursinus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it starts young. Child is struggling a little in school...rush to get a diagnosis and meds. Child is struggling emotionally...rush to the shrink and meds. Parents are always trying to fix things instead of being patient and teaching coping mechanisms.

You don’t think therapists teach coping mechanisms?

I didn't say that therapists don't teach coping mechanisms. I said that parents rush to therapists/psychiatrists instead of trying to teach their kids coping mechanisms themselves. So many parents want a quick fix for their kids problems instead of realizing that kids may just be going through a phase or are maturing at a different rate than peers. These kids go from ADHD drugs to SSRIs to anti-anxiety meds...all by the time their 15 years old. I'm not saying that their aren't some kids for whom these medications are essential. But anyone who thinks there's not a ton of overdiagnosing going on these days is kidding themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I attended a "pressure-cooker" private school 35 years ago, but I wasn't aware of anything like the mental health issues that seem to exist nowadays (though of course drug use, and mental health problems existed). I wonder why things are worse?

35 years ago, you could do ok in high school, attend a prestigious college if your parents could afford it (a job or modest loans if now) and expect to graduate with a well paying job. Now the fight to get into those schools requires kids to be nearly perfect and that modest loan is now decades of debt. That great job after graduation is also a crap shoot. We had generations where kids could expect to do as well as or better than their parents and now we're seeing that eroding

That was my experience around the same time coming from a Texas public HS. The IVY attended was taking 20% of applicants then compared to well under 10% today.

Today, kids know that everything they do is monitored and scored; the second they don't get something right, the parents will be there to ask why and push them to make it perfect. The relentless pressure can take a heavy toll on the 14-17 year-old set.

These parents think they want the best for their kids, but how they get there ends up sometimes being the worst choice they could make.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think parental style or social factors alone are the cause. I suspect it’s something else, though I don’t know what. Because depression among teens is so endemic and crisis level and cuts across so many places, SES levels, and has become so bad so suddenly, I don’t think we can attribute it just to affluence or pressure, though those are tempting targets.

I agree

It's partially due to a lack of meaningful connections. A host of factors contribute to this problem. It's more than social media.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was reading this article in The Atlantic about the suicides at Palo Alto High School:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/12/the-silicon-valley-suicides/413140/

It seems like living in a pressure cooker full of wealthy, well-educated parents in a highly academic environment is a major factor in poor mental health among teenagers. I remember reading a sociological study showing that depression, anxiety, and drug abuse among teenagers plotted to their SES status was like a horseshoe -- most common among wealthy/UMC and poor teens (for very different reasons), but least common among the middle-middle class.

Anecdotally, from DD's private, it seems like almost half of the kids we know are on medications and see a therapist or psychiatrist on a regular basis. The stress and pressure just seem nuts to me, and the constant judgement and competition seem unhealthy for teenagers.

Are there any ways that we as parents can fix this? Pull our kids out of private and put them in an economically diverse public? Move to the Midwest? Insist that our kids don't have to take the most rigorous classes available to them? Be okay with them going to UMD or a SLAC ranked below the Top 20 rather than an Ivy? Put them in therapy with an intense cycle of medications?

I think wealthier families have the time and means to be able to diagnose their troubled kids. There are plenty of kids suffering in low in middle income families and guess what the parents don’t have the time to take off of work or the money to diagnose it and the kids know that so they just suffer through it. It doesn’t get diagnosed and added into these so called statistics.

I will add do you have any idea how long it takes to even get a diagnosis of even a learning Disability not to mention some form of depression or anxiety. It’s a long wait to even get on a wait list for psychologists that do the testing or who are willing to see new patients. That’s just for regular psychologists that don’t deal with insurance. Forget about trying to get into a psychologist that takes insurance. I have friends that tried for six months and still could not get into anyone. Guest what both families are lower income. Wealthier friends were able to pay full cost and get in sooner because they pay out of pocket to someone that does not accept insurance. Most families in the us can not afford to do that.

Therapists will happily spend their days listening to wealthy kids with ennui. A troubled kid whose parents don't have money is lucky to get any treatment let alone psychotherapy

Exactly this so many lower and middle income Kids are not getting diagnosed. They don’t have the resources to even get an appointment and certainly can’t afford to take off work weekly to take their child. They are doing their best and it is sad but I am most certain anxiety and depression are much higher in lower income kids that are not even being diagnosed.

Anxiety and depression is often genetic. Low and middle income kids do have access to resources. Stop with the generalizing.

[Anonymous]

Time would be better spent reading one of the numerous books on this issue, or at least the original Atlantic article quoted before replying. Online forums don’t have the bandwidth to answer weighty complex questions.