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OP here. Yes, our son will have my FIL’s last name. I think that’s enough too.
I really do hate FIL’s name because of a really bad association in my past. I never called my FIL by his first name either, I always called him Pops. Thanks to those who responded. I’m going to stick to my gut on this. I don’t want to hate my son’s first or middle name. |
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Hopefully that is enough of an explanation for your husband.
Did his dad have a nickname or middle name that you don’t mind? Maybe there is a compromise somewhere ? |
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NOPE!!!
My husband and MIL / FIL did this too me too with all of my kids. My husband is a JR and I refused. So much so that I threatened to move to another state for a month to have kid and name him what I wanted. I told them, she had her chance to name her kids. Now it’s mine. I finally told my husband that it was my body pushing out the kid and I get the day so. He agreed. Don’t give your kid a crappy middle name either! |
Maybe you think that's the point of middle names, but others put a lot of thought into them and want them to be meaningful, nice-sounding, and fit with the first names. Not all of us see the middle name as just a dumping ground for ugly family names. Example, my DH picked our son's middle name because he really wanted to use a family name. He chose Andrew, which is a great classic name and goes with our naming style. If he had insisted on something like Herman, I would have vetoed that so fast. Just like if I had picked something super dumb and trendy for the first name like Arrow or Wolf, he would have vetoed it. |
That definitely adds a new dimension to it. My high school rapist was named Richard Robert (double name). There is nothing on this green earth that could convince me to use one of those names, even though my father is named Robert. Stick to your guns. |
Wow your husband is a doormat. I’m surprised you are still married. |
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Not in my family. No one gets to add a name that either parent hates. Period.
You each have a short list. You can consult anyone you want to create it. And then you eliminate one name at a time until the last one remains, which will be the option you can both live with. The end. |
No, she's right. She's the one carrying and pushing out this baby. |
No |
| We had similar situation. My father-in-law wanted to name our only child a name after his sister who passed away long time ago. My father in-law is from another country, and the name is not a typical American name. I'm from the same country as he is originally and didn't like the name because it is old fashioned. I truly didn't like the name so we didn't do it. OP just don't do it! |
| We named our first child after someone on my DH’s side and our second after someone on my side. No names were discussed before we named them. My MIL was super upset that we wouldn’t change our second child’s name to someone on their side. She hasn’t gotten over it and we basically don’t have a relationship with her because she doesn’t like our second child (for no reason except possibly her name since she barely knows her). This child is now in high school. |
| You already are giving the baby his last name. Seems good enough for me. |
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THE BABY WILL HAVE HIS LAST NAME!
That’s enough!! |
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This is what we did. It's the most fair thing to do. |