late 20s living at home

[Anonymous]

Yes Op. She has a plan. Let her, she has a plan.

[Anonymous]

Yes. My husband lived at home in his late 20’s / early 30’s for 5 years after his PhD and before we got married. It’s a high cost of living area and it doesn’t make sense to pay rent and buy household items for a brief time. We were dating and both of us had careers that could go anywhere in the US - so it make sense to save money and stay flexible until we got married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the quesrion.

would you support a 25 year old moving home for a year? other questions I could ask but didn't: what was your experience like having a professional living at home? anything I should know/think about?

Think about how you are going to handle contributions into the various aspects of living together. If you have cleaners/landscapers/etc, do you expect her to contribute to the cost? If you are doing all the work yourself, what/how much do you expect her to contribute?

How are you going to handle the food cost and cooking?

What's going to be your visitors policy? What about any overnight guests?

Does she have her own car? Is she going to be using yours?

Do you expect her to be home by certain time?

Discuss all of the above beforehand and, hopefully, you'll find yourselves on the same page.

are you the mom from hell?

I'm not the pp you quoted, but why would you ask that? They seem like reasonable discussion points for the daughter and parents to discuss.

My parents never would have allowed this. My brother wanted to go to law school at a univeristy near my parents (San Diego) he had been living about an hour away in Orange county. They had a 4 br, 3 bath house but when he mentioned possibly living with them while going to law school, they said no way. He ended up not going because he couldn't afford it.

Well, if that was the case then your parents were terrible people and I feel sorry for your brother. Every one of our four kids moved back home after college for various periods of time -- and were greeted with open arms. I'm sorry your family is so screwed up.

[Anonymous]

The answer is very clearly encourage her to move in. She is planning ahead and working towards financial and career goals in a responsible and thoughtful way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the quesrion.

would you support a 25 year old moving home for a year? other questions I could ask but didn't: what was your experience like having a professional living at home? anything I should know/think about?

Think about how you are going to handle contributions into the various aspects of living together. If you have cleaners/landscapers/etc, do you expect her to contribute to the cost? If you are doing all the work yourself, what/how much do you expect her to contribute?

How are you going to handle the food cost and cooking?

What's going to be your visitors policy? What about any overnight guests?

Does she have her own car? Is she going to be using yours?

Do you expect her to be home by certain time?

Discuss all of the above beforehand and, hopefully, you'll find yourselves on the same page.

are you the mom from hell?

No, I am the daughter from a family where adults discuss things.

[Anonymous]

Would definitely agree. Sounds like a sound plan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the quesrion.

would you support a 25 year old moving home for a year? other questions I could ask but didn't: what was your experience like having a professional living at home? anything I should know/think about?

Think about how you are going to handle contributions into the various aspects of living together. If you have cleaners/landscapers/etc, do you expect her to contribute to the cost? If you are doing all the work yourself, what/how much do you expect her to contribute?

How are you going to handle the food cost and cooking?

What's going to be your visitors policy? What about any overnight guests?

Does she have her own car? Is she going to be using yours?

Do you expect her to be home by certain time?

Discuss all of the above beforehand and, hopefully, you'll find yourselves on the same page.

are you the mom from hell?

No, I am the daughter from a family where adults discuss things.

No, you're the mom from hell.

The idea is to move home and pay loans off. So, no, you don't expect her to pay the cleaners and landscapers -- or even food. And no you don't have to agree in advance if she'll mow the lawn. And you already know whether she has a car, and if she doesn't you know you're happily lending her yours when you can. Etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why wouldn’t I support it? My child has a reasonable, financially responsible plan. This is temporary. If I could help my child in this way, absolutely.

This. Yes.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s great. No rush since it’s to help her out.

But Here is a plan: have your DD pay you done nominal amount (or whatever you are both comfortable with) in “rent”. This is so she gets used to paying something and you don’t feel taken advantage of. When she moves out, she gets it back 100%. So it’s like a savings to get as well. And a win-win when she does leave. So if it’s $300 a month, she gets her $3600 back when she moves out. Will keep her motivated and could be a food security deposit or furniture when she does get her own place.

If something happens and she ends up staying longer, then that’s even more; but the $ may be an incentive for her to want to leave and be on her own sooner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s great. No rush since it’s to help her out.

But Here is a plan: have your DD pay you done nominal amount (or whatever you are both comfortable with) in “rent”. This is so she gets used to paying something and you don’t feel taken advantage of. When she moves out, she gets it back 100%. So it’s like a savings to get as well. And a win-win when she does leave. So if it’s $300 a month, she gets her $3600 back when she moves out. Will keep her motivated and could be a food security deposit or furniture when she does get her own place.

If something happens and she ends up staying longer, then that’s even more; but the $ may be an incentive for her to want to leave and be on her own sooner.

Silly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the quesrion.

Then I guess you have nothing to contribute here.

[Anonymous]

OP looks to me like you raised a responsible ambitious adult. Yes let her move back. She's moving her life ahead and eliminating debt. You should be proud.

[Anonymous]

After seeing the horror-story articles about compounding interest on student loan debt, where $40K or $50K balloons into $150K even with constant payments, she is absolutely doing the right, financially sound thing. Kudos for her for coming up with a plan that is advancing her career and solving a potential financial disaster at the same time. I would say yes in a heartbeat. I wouldn't require rent or payments in this situation if that money is being used to pay down the student loans, which is the point of living at home in the first place.

[Anonymous]

I aspire to have children with a mix of ambition and practicality. Your daughter's plan is perfect.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely, I’d be thrilled. Also, I happen to think it’s my job to do all I can to keep my kids from having debt when they graduate.