Middle School Culture Shock

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not so fast about North Bethesda. Was touring programs in the county of 2E a few year ago and NB was the single most rowdy school I saw out of three on the West side.

I witnessed a kid run full sprint - knock down a girl coming out of a class like a linebacker - and my tour guide (assistant principal) did absolutely nothing. Of course the kid just kept going...


That’s about par for the course. Having had 2 at NB within the last few years we are aware of all the really bad things that went on there. Let me tell you, NB is the tamest out of the W/Bethesda middle schools, except for maybe a Tilden. The things our kids told us were happening at Pyle or Westland made the things a PP posted about (child porn, hook ups and vaping) look like every day normal behavior.


Ok, really? What’s happening at Pyle? We’re supposed to send DD there next year but this makes me a bit apprehensive!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I mean, this kind of stuff is developmentally normal and appropriate. Kids pushing boundaries. Take as old as time.


Kinda sad that parents refuse to parent.


Agreed. Parents who excuse this stuff are doing a real disservice to both their own kids and those around them.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.


It is well documented in historical documents and academic research that disrespect for teachers in the US started to emerge in the 1970s and took off in the 1980s. Just because you didn’t notice it doesn’t mean it wasn’t a problem. You can argue that it has gotten worse especially because of social media and cell phones but to argue it is a new phenomenon is not true.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.


Many things happened that you never saw. This isn't a comment on you personally, it's a comment on the limits of one person's personal experience with respect to society.
Anonymous
Yea it sucks, but unfortunately, not out the realm of "normal".

In ES, the younger kids are more segregated from the older kids. In our ES, Ker even have their own playground.

But, as they get older, they are exposed to older kids who have older siblings, who curse, and do all kinds of things that we don't want our younger more innocent kids exposed to. But unfortunately, it happens.
My DC was exposed to cursing at ES, too.

I don't doubt that some of this happens in private schools, but since private schools are much smaller than publics, the scale is also much smaller. Not really an apples to apples comparison. Plus, private schools can pick and choose which students they want to accept. Publics can't do that.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.


Many things happened that you never saw. This isn't a comment on you personally, it's a comment on the limits of one person's personal experience with respect to society.

+1 never saw anyone taking drugs in HS, but I know it happened because someone I know was completely high on coke when I met up with them, and I saw weed being sold in class once. Another person asked me where she could get some weed. I had no clue because I never took drugs, but I assume this person found some weed eventually and smoked it.

As for porn, please.. we had dirty magazines that could be passed around.
Anonymous
We had fights in our middle school in the 80s, cursing, and smoking. This was a rural, predominantly white middle school in VA

Fights, phones are an issue for sure in MCPS. But it seems vaping has declined over the past two years. I have an 8th grader.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.


Many things happened that you never saw. This isn't a comment on you personally, it's a comment on the limits of one person's personal experience with respect to society.

+1 never saw anyone taking drugs in HS, but I know it happened because someone I know was completely high on coke when I met up with them, and I saw weed being sold in class once. Another person asked me where she could get some weed. I had no clue because I never took drugs, but I assume this person found some weed eventually and smoked it.

As for porn, please.. we had dirty magazines that could be passed around.


Oh, the porn is at a whole other level now.

Are you serious? Dirty magazines? LOL. That is tame. Ask your middle schooler about the websites the kids talk about at school. If your kid is honest, it will be eye-opening what they are exposed to.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.


Many things happened that you never saw. This isn't a comment on you personally, it's a comment on the limits of one person's personal experience with respect to society.

+1 never saw anyone taking drugs in HS, but I know it happened because someone I know was completely high on coke when I met up with them, and I saw weed being sold in class once. Another person asked me where she could get some weed. I had no clue because I never took drugs, but I assume this person found some weed eventually and smoked it.

As for porn, please.. we had dirty magazines that could be passed around.


Oh, the porn is at a whole other level now.

Are you serious? Dirty magazines? LOL. That is tame. Ask your middle schooler about the websites the kids talk about at school. If your kid is honest, it will be eye-opening what they are exposed to.

You do know that there were pretty hardcore dirty magazines in the 80s right? And porn videos?

Anyways, I'm all for curtailing porn, but what do you want to have happen? Even if they ban phones in MS you realize that kids meet outside of school grounds, right? Unless you ban your kid from having a phone or hanging out with kids who have phones, your kid is going to get exposed at one point. Good luck.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


There were no phones so no distributing porn was happening. Weed maybe but that’s happening too.


I agree about phones and porn. However, I was referring to OP’s original post and plenty of kids cursed, were disrespectful to teachers behind their backs and tried to wear inappropriate clothing. And I remember my mom telling me that when she was young kids were different.


We passed around an actual book that was pornographic in my middle school in the 1980s - so low tech


It was magazines at my school.

My parents never dismissed it or accepted it as normal. If we were caught misbehaving or being disrespectful we were punished. That didn't mean that we didn't push the boundaries, it is what kids do. MS is the first time kids are changing classes regularly and have a larger amount of independence. They carry more in their backpacks and can stash things in their lockers. There is more room for bad behavior so stuff happens. The bus ride tends to be longer, heck it will be my kids first time on a bus because he walks to school right now, so there is more time and space for bad behavior.

Explaining why it happens does not mean condoning it.

That stuff happened, using different formats, when I was in school. At the time people were blaming music videos and song lyrics. Kids were busted for smoking in the bathroom, porn magazines were passed around, there was swearing. Some kids were punished when caught and others were not. The ones who were punished either changed their behavior or tried to more careful and avoid getting caught. The ones who were not punished tended to keep doing the stupid crap. You ended up with the kids people avoided because they were "trouble makers" and the kids people wanted their kids to hang out with. Half the time the "good kids" were just better at nit getting caught.

And this was totally happening in the 50's and 60's and 70's. It might have been harder to have happen because the technologies were different but I promise you that there were kids doing the same type of things and pushing boundaries then.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not so fast about North Bethesda. Was touring programs in the county of 2E a few year ago and NB was the single most rowdy school I saw out of three on the West side.

I witnessed a kid run full sprint - knock down a girl coming out of a class like a linebacker - and my tour guide (assistant principal) did absolutely nothing. Of course the kid just kept going...


That’s about par for the course. Having had 2 at NB within the last few years we are aware of all the really bad things that went on there. Let me tell you, NB is the tamest out of the W/Bethesda middle schools, except for maybe a Tilden. The things our kids told us were happening at Pyle or Westland made the things a PP posted about (child porn, hook ups and vaping) look like every day normal behavior.


Ok, really? What’s happening at Pyle? We’re supposed to send DD there next year but this makes me a bit apprehensive!

Just do a search for Pyle here and you will see.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


There were no phones so no distributing porn was happening. Weed maybe but that’s happening too.

I can tell you there were exchanging and distributing of porn magazines in my private school
DP
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember the exact same behavior in the 80s when I was in middle school and I attended a private school.


Seriously doubt that people were treating teachers the same way. I certainly never saw it.


Many things happened that you never saw. This isn't a comment on you personally, it's a comment on the limits of one person's personal experience with respect to society.

+1 never saw anyone taking drugs in HS, but I know it happened because someone I know was completely high on coke when I met up with them, and I saw weed being sold in class once. Another person asked me where she could get some weed. I had no clue because I never took drugs, but I assume this person found some weed eventually and smoked it.

As for porn, please.. we had dirty magazines that could be passed around.


Oh, the porn is at a whole other level now.

Are you serious? Dirty magazines? LOL. That is tame. Ask your middle schooler about the websites the kids talk about at school. If your kid is honest, it will be eye-opening what they are exposed to.

You do know that there were pretty hardcore dirty magazines in the 80s right? And porn videos?

Anyways, I'm all for curtailing porn, but what do you want to have happen? Even if they ban phones in MS you realize that kids meet outside of school grounds, right? Unless you ban your kid from having a phone or hanging out with kids who have phones, your kid is going to get exposed at one point. Good luck.


Personally, I think some of the hardcore websites should be harder to get to. I mean, there is basically free, easy access to pretty questionable material.

I’m not against porn, but I am required to put in my birthday to verify my age before I look at alcohol websites. Hardcore porn? Free for all ages.

Maybe make the porn sites all require payment. Shut down the ones that offer access for free. Could be a start.
Anonymous
Its middle school and kids further testing and pushing boundaries. Nothing new. The kids typically range from 11-14, so yes what is talked about and experienced is going to have a greater range. The kids with older siblings now have people in HS and college expose them to things. Throw in 90% of parents giving kids phones before 8th grade and Viola.

Welcome to MS. Out of the kiddie pool and into the deeper end you go. Let the games begin.
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