Middle School Culture Shock

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Not just swearing, but also watching anime on Chromebook, and disobeying the teachers, etc.

Oh no! Watching anime! Etc.!

[/b]What's wrong with anime?[b] Not all of it is bad. The swearing and disobeying teachers is a parenting issue. It doesn't matter where or how they go to school but you need to make it unacceptable in your home. And, don't use a chromebook at home so you can monitor what goes on.

The kids at my middle school are watching anime porn so…

Signed,
A school psychologist

SO, if they are doing it at your school on the school computers, what are YOU doing about it? its not happening in our home.

How do you know? At school, we have go guardian so I can see what all the kids are doing in my class. What are you doing that you [i]think works?

We monitor everything. And, we don’t use school computers so we can monitor it. Kids use desk tops were we can see the screens. We have access to everything.

So you collect their chromebooks when they come home?

Have you found the hidden tor browser?

My brother's kid got a bootable linux usb stick with a vpn connection. When they weren't looking, she booted their PC up with it and bypassed all the monitoring/logging stuff. You can't watch tweens and teens like toddlers. Or if you do, you'll mess them up worse.

We don’t have an mcps chrome book. We simply never picked one up. Mcps lied when they said you cannot do things like testing on your own computer. Actually you can watch your kids and monitor those things. Because you don’t is why they do it.

Interesting. What do your kids use in class when they are expected to have their chromebook? Middle school kids generally use them in most classes most days.

And of course by "interesting" I'm calling "bullsh*t". Having no chromebook worked in virtual, but no more. And if your kids are in the VA, then their experience really doesn't have bearing on this thread.

You can call it what ever you want and yes, we are still using our own computers.

[Anonymous]

You can’t hide your child from the world. Parents that are extreme like this have kids that hide burner or old phones their friends give them under their mattresses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not just swearing, but also watching anime on Chromebook, and disobeying the teachers, etc.

Oh no! Watching anime! Etc.!

[/b]What's wrong with anime?[b] Not all of it is bad. The swearing and disobeying teachers is a parenting issue. It doesn't matter where or how they go to school but you need to make it unacceptable in your home. And, don't use a chromebook at home so you can monitor what goes on.

The kids at my middle school are watching anime porn so…

Signed,
A school psychologist

SO, if they are doing it at your school on the school computers, what are YOU doing about it? its not happening in our home.

How do you know? At school, we have go guardian so I can see what all the kids are doing in my class. What are you doing that you [i]think works?

We monitor everything. And, we don’t use school computers so we can monitor it. Kids use desk tops were we can see the screens. We have access to everything.

So you collect their chromebooks when they come home?

Have you found the hidden tor browser?

My brother's kid got a bootable linux usb stick with a vpn connection. When they weren't looking, she booted their PC up with it and bypassed all the monitoring/logging stuff. You can't watch tweens and teens like toddlers. Or if you do, you'll mess them up worse.

We don’t have an mcps chrome book. We simply never picked one up. Mcps lied when they said you cannot do things like testing on your own computer. Actually you can watch your kids and monitor those things. Because you don’t is why they do it.

Interesting. What do your kids use in class when they are expected to have their chromebook? Middle school kids generally use them in most classes most days.

And of course by "interesting" I'm calling "bullsh*t". Having no chromebook worked in virtual, but no more. And if your kids are in the VA, then their experience really doesn't have bearing on this thread.

You can call it what ever you want and yes, we are still using our own computers.

You sweet summer child...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean, this kind of stuff is developmentally normal and appropriate. Kids pushing boundaries. Take as old as time.

Except now we live in a wildly different world and everything is x100 on steriods. You can compare smoking weed and looking a playboy magazines with the world of today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, this kind of stuff is developmentally normal and appropriate. Kids pushing boundaries. Take as old as time.

Except now we live in a wildly different world and everything is x100 on steriods. You can compare smoking weed and looking a playboy magazines with the world of today.

*Can't* compare

[Anonymous]

It's a balance. If you don't protect the kid enough, they can head in the wrong direction.

If you overprotect, you run the risk of rebellion for the sake of rebellion (so you inadvertently led them to do exactly what you didn't want them to do), creating an easy mark (too sheltered or naive), making a husk of a person who doesn't know who they are, etc, when they enter the real world.

At least if they explore while still at home, you have some control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a balance. If you don't protect the kid enough, they can head in the wrong direction.

If you overprotect, you run the risk of rebellion for the sake of rebellion (so you inadvertently led them to do exactly what you didn't want them to do), creating an easy mark (too sheltered or naive), making a husk of a person who doesn't know who they are, etc, when they enter the real world.

At least if they explore while still at home, you have some control.

+1

DC is 13, no phone (among the last hold outs in peer group!). I can monitor browsing and used to do so much more closely. We also had one of the Circle devices, which was easy enough to google workarounds. Now monitor periodically, but also encouraging independence, decision making and good judgement. I've found that since I've backed off, DC is more open to asking questions, especially about things overheard at school, or on a friend's phone during lunch or after school. As parents, we walk a tightrope and need to constantly adjust. I don't have all the answers (I doubt any of you do, either). I accept that some mistakes will be made along the way and hope to learn from them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can’t hide your child from the world. Parents that are extreme like this have kids that hide burner or old phones their friends give them under their mattresses.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, this kind of stuff is developmentally normal and appropriate. Kids pushing boundaries. Take as old as time.

Except now we live in a wildly different world and everything is x100 on steriods. You can compare smoking weed and looking a playboy magazines with the world of today.

Every generation feels everything is x100, when really its just wildly different than when you were a kid. Which doesn’t really matter because its completely the world your kids have always grown up in. The sooner adults adjust the better off kids. If parents 1) realize they need to monitor screen time, 2)actually parent instead of trying to keep up with their neighbors and 3) stop believing “my kid would never” and realize oh yes your kid would, kids will be just fine.

[Anonymous]

This is why I don't even think middle school should exist. Keep kids being kids and I bet there would be less problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is why I don't even think middle school should exist. Keep kids being kids and I bet there would be less problems.

How do you propose we do this? Put bricks on their heads to keep them from growing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So thankful my kids do distance learning/homeschool. They spend time with kids who still act like kids and there's none of these issues.

Questioning authority and adopting adult behaviors actually is acting like kids, though - for kids who are in middle school.

Agreed and eventually kids are exposed to porn / drugs / swearing / skimpy clothes (not necessarily in that order). How will they handle that? Know several young people who got their taste of freedom and went off the deep end. If you think that only “bad, unloved, public school” kids become [b]drug addicts and find themselves in very unhappy relationships think again.

First of all I don't understand prolonging childhood? Kids are kids til they are 18, that is childhood. And why shouldn't young teens get to be kids, I think it's great for them. I do think prolonging childhood will help curve these behaviors



That's a stretch. I don't think that prolonging childhood into the young teen years will lead to those problems. The homeschool children and families we know have similar values and want to give their kids time to mature. When they come across all these things, they will be older and more mature and in a much better position to handle these things than a 10 year old. My 9 yo nephew learned what "tossed salad" was at school. No one needs to know that. So glad we can choose our kids' cohorts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I don't even think middle school should exist. Keep kids being kids and I bet there would be less problems.

How do you propose we do this? Put bricks on their heads to keep them from growing?

What does bricks on their heads have to do with anything?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, this kind of stuff is developmentally normal and appropriate. Kids pushing boundaries. Take as old as time.

Except now we live in a wildly different world and everything is x100 on steriods. You can compare smoking weed and looking a playboy magazines with the world of today.

Every generation feels everything is x100, when really its just wildly different than when you were a kid. Which doesn’t really matter because its completely the world your kids have always grown up in. The sooner adults adjust the better off kids. If parents 1) realize they need to monitor screen time, 2)actually parent instead of trying to keep up with their neighbors and 3) stop believing “my kid would never” and realize oh yes your kid would, kids will be just fine.

+1, except it seems like this generation of parents would rather make excuses than step up and parent. Parents always faced issues but the issues have changed over time. Kids behave this way when they are allowed to. You still need to supervise and support your kids. You need to monitor everything. And, trust but verify. Things aren't that different. The only difference is electronics so some forms of bullying and other things are far worse but many things really haven't changed as much as people say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, this kind of stuff is developmentally normal and appropriate. Kids pushing boundaries. Take as old as time.

Except now we live in a wildly different world and everything is x100 on steriods. You can compare smoking weed and looking a playboy magazines with the world of today.

Every generation feels everything is x100, when really its just wildly different than when you were a kid. Which doesn’t really matter because its completely the world your kids have always grown up in. The sooner adults adjust the better off kids. If parents 1) realize they need to monitor screen time, 2)actually parent instead of trying to keep up with their neighbors and 3) stop believing “my kid would never” and realize oh yes your kid would, kids will be just fine.

+1, except it seems like this generation of parents would rather make excuses than step up and parent. Parents always faced issues but the issues have changed over time. Kids behave this way when they are allowed to. You still need to supervise and support your kids. You need to monitor everything. And, trust but verify. Things aren't that different. The only difference is electronics so some forms of bullying and other things are far worse but many things really haven't changed as much as people say.

Nah, human nature hasn't changed, and that applies to parents too.