Thin / skinny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whenever I see a very thin mom, I am green with envy. Does this mean, I need to lose weight? I’m not that heavy myself but I’m still jealous for some reason. Does anyone know the healthy response?

I think the healthy response is that health, not weight, should be our goal. As we age our bodies will deteriorate to a degree and being healthy has an impact on that. It's a common assumption that heavy people are unhealthy but being too thin can also be unhealthy.

Oh goodness this. I know plenty of "skinny fat" moms that look better in a bathing suit than me, but have zero muscle and can't go on a 2 mile hike with their kids or play a game of soccer without getting winded. That lack of health will catch up with them faster than someone who is fit but 10 pounds over their preferred weight. I eat very well and exercise multiple times a week, and my weight naturally hovers right on the line between normal and overweight. I could restrict my already healthy diet and drop a size or two, but I focus on doing better on the Peleton or at yoga, and appreciate my body for what it can do, not what it looks like.

I think it's natural to have some jealousy of people who can put in zero effort for something you have to work for, but if it's more than a passing feeling, then that's about you and isn't healthy. Try to appreciate yourself and if you have room for improvement, then work on that because it will make you healthier, not to look better than others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t be jealous of me. I am skinny because of stress. I’d trade a simpler life for a few pounds.

+1, but swap stress for anxiety.

Well, I am anxious and fat--and in my case. my fatness is largely a result of my anxiety. I exercise every day but when I get stressed, I cannot stop eating.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand the point of being thin/skinny.

Fit? Yes, because being fit implies that the person has some capacity with their physique - there are things they can do and are capable of with their body, which is admirable. Thin/skinny is pointless to me. Like seriously, what's the point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t be jealous of me. I am skinny because of stress. I’d trade a simpler life for a few pounds.

+1, but swap stress for anxiety.

Well, I am anxious and fat--and in my case. my fatness is largely a result of my anxiety. I exercise every day but when I get stressed, I cannot stop eating.

I hear you. Anxiety has caused me to gain weight, at times, from vegging out and mindlessly munching. It is better than turning to alcohol or drugs, but it is still self medicating.

[Anonymous]

I think the healthy response is to recognize that there will always be people who have what you want. More money, naturally thin body, better job, whatever. And there are people who want what comes easily to you.

I have a healthy size 8 body but I wish I was a size 2. Realistically, that is not going to happen. So I try not to dwell on it, and appreciate what I have, which is a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the point of being thin/skinny.

Fit? Yes, because being fit implies that the person has some capacity with their physique - there are things they can do and are capable of with their body, which is admirable. Thin/skinny is pointless to me. Like seriously, what's the point?

They are just words.

[Anonymous]

I am thin and very fit. I know many women envy my body. If they knew the details of my life they would NEVER want to be me. I have a lot of difficult things in my life, most people do. OP maybe when you see a thin person you can wonder what difficult thing they are going through in their life, (health issues, abusive relationship, job loss, mental health issues, family issues, etc). My motto is be kind to everyone, because everyone is struggling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whenever I see a very thin mom, I am green with envy. Does this mean, I need to lose weight? I’m not that heavy myself but I’m still jealous for some reason. Does anyone know the healthy response?

I think the healthy response is that health, not weight, should be our goal. As we age our bodies will deteriorate to a degree and being healthy has an impact on that. It's a common assumption that heavy people are unhealthy but being too thin can also be unhealthy.

Oh goodness this. I know plenty of "skinny fat" moms that look better in a bathing suit than me, but have zero muscle and can't go on a 2 mile hike with their kids or play a game of soccer without getting winded. That lack of health will catch up with them faster than someone who is fit but 10 pounds over their preferred weight. I eat very well and exercise multiple times a week, and my weight naturally hovers right on the line between normal and overweight. I could restrict my already healthy diet and drop a size or two, but I focus on doing better on the Peleton or at yoga, and appreciate my body for what it can do, not what it looks like.

I think it's natural to have some jealousy of people who can put in zero effort for something you have to work for, but if it's more than a passing feeling, then that's about you and isn't healthy. Try to appreciate yourself and if you have room for improvement, then work on that because it will make you healthier, not to look better than others.

“Yes I envy women thinner than me but instead of just dealing with my own self esteem issues, I call them ‘skinny fat’ in my head and judge them for being less healthy than me, based on a bunch of stuff I assume but can’t possibly know about their bodies and lifestyle, and also I’ve decided being envious is ‘natural’ and therefore fine— I am perfect and those skinny moms are not. Ha!”

Stop rationalizing this. Their bodies, fitness, and health are none of your business. Did you know some people struggle to gain or maintain weight due to both physical and mental conditions? Are those people still “skinny fat” to you? You need to find a way to feel okay with your body that does not involve putting others down. This is a really toxic attitude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whenever I do, I think: I would love to be that skinny so I could eat whatever I wanted until I got to my normal weight again. My husband is always amused by this.

I am fit/thin/athletic with a slow metabolism so I assume they have a fast metabolism. That's my envy---to be able to work out less and eat more! I work my butt off 6 days per week and healthy diet to maintain.

My wife has been like this throughout most of her life. She’s had an athletic body with a fast metabolism. She works out a lot and is in great shape but at 48 she’s starting to realize that she can’t eat sweets and wine every night and still have a six packish stomach. She’s actually becoming…normal. She gets frustrated when her clothes start getting to snug and goes and works out harder. But, like with most people you can’t outrun a bad diet - its not as simple as calories in and calories out. It will be interesting to see if she wants to stay fit enough to break up with Little Debbie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the healthy response is to recognize that there will always be people who have what you want. More money, naturally thin body, better job, whatever. And there are people who want what comes easily to you.

I have a healthy size 8 body but I wish I was a size 2. Realistically, that is not going to happen. So I try not to dwell on it, and appreciate what I have, which is a lot.

+1. I am fit but not going to lie, sometimes I catch myself wanting the bigger house, the more put together look, nicer vacations. OP-I work on being grateful and yes, it can be hard.

[Anonymous]

OP, I used to have a body that I thought was okay. Not great, not skinny but not fat. But I really disliked my arms. I was reluctant to wear tank tops because they seemed too large. I worked out a lot, so I thought, well I'm fit, so it's okay.

But I wasn't confident, and I finally decided that if I'm not confident and I'm hiding, I needed to make a change.

So it was hard but I lost weight, went from a size 8 to a size 2, and got really cut arms.

When you feel jealous of someone, you could try to explain away the jealousy, or imagine that they are not worth the envy. Or, you can say to yourself, what is this feeling telling me about what my actual goals and desires are? And how can that help me make changes that I will be happy about?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I used to have a body that I thought was okay. Not great, not skinny but not fat. But I really disliked my arms. I was reluctant to wear tank tops because they seemed too large. I worked out a lot, so I thought, well I'm fit, so it's okay.

But I wasn't confident, and I finally decided that if I'm not confident and I'm hiding, I needed to make a change.

So it was hard but I lost weight, went from a size 8 to a size 2, and got really cut arms.

When you feel jealous of someone, you could try to explain away the jealousy, or imagine that they are not worth the envy. Or, you can say to yourself, what is this feeling telling me about what my actual goals and desires are? And how can that help me make changes that I will be happy about?

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whenever I see a very thin mom, I am green with envy. Does this mean, I need to lose weight? I’m not that heavy myself but I’m still jealous for some reason. Does anyone know the healthy response?

I think the healthy response is that health, not weight, should be our goal. As we age our bodies will deteriorate to a degree and being healthy has an impact on that. It's a common assumption that heavy people are unhealthy but being too thin can also be unhealthy.

Oh goodness this. I know plenty of "skinny fat" moms that look better in a bathing suit than me, but have zero muscle and can't go on a 2 mile hike with their kids or play a game of soccer without getting winded. That lack of health will catch up with them faster than someone who is fit but 10 pounds over their preferred weight. I eat very well and exercise multiple times a week, and my weight naturally hovers right on the line between normal and overweight. I could restrict my already healthy diet and drop a size or two, but I focus on doing better on the Peleton or at yoga, and appreciate my body for what it can do, not what it looks like.

I think it's natural to have some jealousy of people who can put in zero effort for something you have to work for, but if it's more than a passing feeling, then that's about you and isn't healthy. Try to appreciate yourself and if you have room for improvement, then work on that because it will make you healthier, not to look better than others.

“Yes I envy women thinner than me but instead of just dealing with my own self esteem issues, I call them ‘skinny fat’ in my head and judge them for being less healthy than me, based on a bunch of stuff I assume but can’t possibly know about their bodies and lifestyle, and also I’ve decided being envious is ‘natural’ and therefore fine— I am perfect and those skinny moms are not. Ha!”

Stop rationalizing this. Their bodies, fitness, and health are none of your business. Did you know some people struggle to gain or maintain weight due to both physical and mental conditions? Are those people still “skinny fat” to you? You need to find a way to feel okay with your body that does not involve putting others down. This is a really toxic attitude.

+1. PP's are being ridiculous to even entertain the discussion that there is anything to see here other than what's going on in OP's head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whenever I see a very thin mom, I am green with envy. Does this mean, I need to lose weight? I’m not that heavy myself but I’m still jealous for some reason. Does anyone know the healthy response?

I think the healthy response is that health, not weight, should be our goal. As we age our bodies will deteriorate to a degree and being healthy has an impact on that. It's a common assumption that heavy people are unhealthy but being too thin can also be unhealthy.

Oh goodness this. I know plenty of "skinny fat" moms that look better in a bathing suit than me, but have zero muscle and can't go on a 2 mile hike with their kids or play a game of soccer without getting winded. That lack of health will catch up with them faster than someone who is fit but 10 pounds over their preferred weight. I eat very well and exercise multiple times a week, and my weight naturally hovers right on the line between normal and overweight. I could restrict my already healthy diet and drop a size or two, but I focus on doing better on the Peleton or at yoga, and appreciate my body for what it can do, not what it looks like.

I think it's natural to have some jealousy of people who can put in zero effort for something you have to work for, but if it's more than a passing feeling, then that's about you and isn't healthy. Try to appreciate yourself and if you have room for improvement, then work on that because it will make you healthier, not to look better than others.

“Yes I envy women thinner than me but instead of just dealing with my own self esteem issues, I call them ‘skinny fat’ in my head and judge them for being less healthy than me, based on a bunch of stuff I assume but can’t possibly know about their bodies and lifestyle, and also I’ve decided being envious is ‘natural’ and therefore fine— I am perfect and those skinny moms are not. Ha!”

Stop rationalizing this. Their bodies, fitness, and health are none of your business. Did you know some people struggle to gain or maintain weight due to both physical and mental conditions? Are those people still “skinny fat” to you? You need to find a way to feel okay with your body that does not involve putting others down. This is a really toxic attitude.

Man, I think we should all just read this sentence over and over and over and over again until it finally sinks in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whenever I see a very thin mom, I am green with envy. Does this mean, I need to lose weight? I’m not that heavy myself but I’m still jealous for some reason. Does anyone know the healthy response?

I think the healthy response is that health, not weight, should be our goal. As we age our bodies will deteriorate to a degree and being healthy has an impact on that. It's a common assumption that heavy people are unhealthy but being too thin can also be unhealthy.

Oh goodness this. I know plenty of "skinny fat" moms that look better in a bathing suit than me, but have zero muscle and can't go on a 2 mile hike with their kids or play a game of soccer without getting winded. That lack of health will catch up with them faster than someone who is fit but 10 pounds over their preferred weight. I eat very well and exercise multiple times a week, and my weight naturally hovers right on the line between normal and overweight. I could restrict my already healthy diet and drop a size or two, but I focus on doing better on the Peleton or at yoga, and appreciate my body for what it can do, not what it looks like.

I think it's natural to have some jealousy of people who can put in zero effort for something you have to work for, but if it's more than a passing feeling, then that's about you and isn't healthy. Try to appreciate yourself and if you have room for improvement, then work on that because it will make you healthier, not to look better than others.

“Yes I envy women thinner than me but instead of just dealing with my own self esteem issues, I call them ‘skinny fat’ in my head and judge them for being less healthy than me, based on a bunch of stuff I assume but can’t possibly know about their bodies and lifestyle, and also I’ve decided being envious is ‘natural’ and therefore fine— I am perfect and those skinny moms are not. Ha!”

Stop rationalizing this. Their bodies, fitness, and health are none of your business. Did you know some people struggle to gain or maintain weight due to both physical and mental conditions? Are those people still “skinny fat” to you? You need to find a way to feel okay with your body that does not involve putting others down. This is a really toxic attitude.

Wow, way to jump to conclusions. I'm talking about my SIL, best friend, etc. People I actually know and love. They know they are risking their health and have issues like back pain from lack of core strength. They know this and talk about it with me. Not everyone who is skinny is unhealthy, just like not everyone who is healthy is skinny. The POINT is that skinny is not the most important thing, and OP should not assume that because some other mom is skinny, she's doing better than OP and should be what she compares herself against. Stop making this about you, yeesh.