I'm a SAHM and my husband won't let me send money to my teen son. Who's right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't OP get a job if she wants her son to have money?

She has a job. She maintains the home and presumably keeps his kid alive.

She has a job that pays zero. Not practical when someone else pays for you to live.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't OP get a job if she wants her son to have money?

She has a job. She maintains the home and presumably keeps his kid alive.

She has a job that pays zero. Not practical when someone else pays for you to live.

You are a one note idiot. Marriage is a partnership. She is ENTITLED to half of his income.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't OP get a job if she wants her son to have money?

She has a job. She maintains the home and presumably keeps his kid alive.

She has a job that pays zero. Not practical when someone else pays for you to live.

You are a one note idiot. Marriage is a partnership. She is ENTITLED to half of his income.

Not unless they are divorced. Right now she needs to take what he is willing to give which means Junior is out of luck.

You seem outraged at the idea that a stepparent isn't willing to pay the expenses of an adult (or nearly adult) who is not his. Why? Mom and/or Junior need a job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I side with your husband. He works so it is his money to control. Put the kids in daycare and get a job of your own to support your adult son.

Marriage is a partnership and regardless of the incomer earner it is family/household money. If she is not a high earner, it will cost her far more to put two kids in day care than it would for him to give $100-200 a month.

It may not be about the money but the principle. Why can't the stepson get a job?

It ain't 1950, grandma. Freshmen shouldn't work. Freshman year is a time to transition and set good academic, involvement and social foundations.

This response is the exact reason why this generation is being raised to be afraid of their own shadow. GMAB with this. You do realize that...*gasp*... Some kids go to community college and work at the same time?!?! I know I know, get the smelling salts!

The stepson needs a job. You are the reason we have men posting on DCUM posting from heir basements with MRA BS because they've been coddled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't OP get a job if she wants her son to have money?

She has a job. She maintains the home and presumably keeps his kid alive.

She has a job that pays zero. Not practical when someone else pays for you to live.

You are a one note idiot. Marriage is a partnership. She is ENTITLED to half of his income.

Not unless they are divorced. Right now she needs to take what he is willing to give which means Junior is out of luck.

You seem outraged at the idea that a stepparent isn't willing to pay the expenses of an adult (or nearly adult) who is not his. Why? Mom and/or Junior need a job.

So mom can walk out every day to her job, and leave DH to figure out what to do with their two minor children.

You sound like a nitwit.

[Anonymous]

Leave it to DCUM to turn what is step-parenting issue into yet another diatribe on stay-at-home parents.

I doubt the husband is going to take the same hard-line when his daughters go off to college. The fact is, when he married this woman, he took on some responsibility for his stepson. And he definitely took on some responsibility for his wife.

how you are all turning a simple case of a kid wanting a little bit of spending money into wht you turned it into is really quite amazing. And super hideous

(And nope. I'm not a stay-at-home mom. And yes I worked my ass off to college. But we don't really know the entire situation with this kid we're jumping to the conclusions that best fit our biases. It ain't cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't OP get a job if she wants her son to have money?

She has a job. She maintains the home and presumably keeps his kid alive.

She has a job that pays zero. Not practical when someone else pays for you to live.

You are a one note idiot. Marriage is a partnership. She is ENTITLED to half of his income.

Not unless they are divorced. Right now she needs to take what he is willing to give which means Junior is out of luck.

You seem outraged at the idea that a stepparent isn't willing to pay the expenses of an adult (or nearly adult) who is not his. Why? Mom and/or Junior need a job.

So mom can walk out every day to her job, and leave DH to figure out what to do with their two minor children.

You sound like a nitwit.

Hmm let's see. He could do what literally millions of other parents do when both parents work: find a good daycare, au pair, nanny, grandma, in home care service.
SAHMs are very replaceable dear. I doubt he is going to be overwrought.

You sound dim.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
It ain't 1950, grandma. Freshmen shouldn't work. Freshman year is a time to transition and set good academic, involvement and social foundations.

This response is the exact reason why this generation is being raised to be afraid of their own shadow. GMAB with this. You do realize that...*gasp*... Some kids go to community college and work at the same time?!?! I know I know, get the smelling salts!

The stepson needs a job. You are the reason we have men posting on DCUM posting from heir basements with MRA BS because they've been coddled.

You’re thick. 80% of community college kids never finish a credential. MIT curriculum and experience is a bit different from a few community college courses. I don’t know one upper middle class or rich alum who worked freshman school year. Why? Because every millennial goes to college now, you need REALLY strong marks, campus involvement and campus network to differentiate yourself. Work summers and perhaps part-time soph-senior years.

Step-dad is an asshole and no doubt the hardline no allowance rule will be different for his bio daughters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
It ain't 1950, grandma. Freshmen shouldn't work. Freshman year is a time to transition and set good academic, involvement and social foundations.

This response is the exact reason why this generation is being raised to be afraid of their own shadow. GMAB with this. You do realize that...*gasp*... Some kids go to community college and work at the same time?!?! I know I know, get the smelling salts!

The stepson needs a job. You are the reason we have men posting on DCUM posting from heir basements with MRA BS because they've been coddled.

You’re thick. 80% of community college kids never finish a credential. MIT curriculum and experience is a bit different from a few community college courses. I don’t know one upper middle class or rich alum who worked freshman school year. Why? Because every millennial goes to college now, you need REALLY strong marks, campus involvement and campus network to differentiate yourself. Work summers and perhaps part-time soph-senior years.

Step-dad is an asshole and no doubt the hardline no allowance rule will be different for his bio daughters.

Sources for info here? I think you are full of it.

And this kid isn't upper middle class or rich so your post is moot. If he were, this post wouldn't be needed.

The H has no requirement to pay for a kid that isn't his. So what if it's different for his bio children? Looks like mom needs to get off her ass!

[Anonymous]

Stepdad doesnt need to provide for the son of his wife. Where do you draw the line? If the stepson wanted the poor schmuck to pony up for his wedding, thats on him too? What if they divorce? Hes not going to get a single cent or acknowledgement from the kid. This is why there is so much resentment. Respect and civility is enough. Bio parents who expect their spouses to eorship their non bio stepkids arr setting themselves for failure.

[Anonymous]

I meant worship. Stepdad sounds like he is getting the raw end of the stick with a lazy wife and a stepson with poor money management.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave it to DCUM to turn what is step-parenting issue into yet another diatribe on stay-at-home parents.

I doubt the husband is going to take the same hard-line when his daughters go off to college. The fact is, when he married this woman, he took on some responsibility for his stepson. And he definitely took on some responsibility for his wife.

how you are all turning a simple case of a kid wanting a little bit of spending money into wht you turned it into is really quite amazing. And super hideous

(And nope. I'm not a stay-at-home mom. And yes I worked my ass off to college. But we don't really know the entire situation with this kid we're jumping to the conclusions that best fit our biases. It ain't cool.

Assuming this is a step-parenting issue is nearly as silly as assuming it is a SAHM issue. There are a multitude of reasons OP's husband could be reluctant to send additional funds to the student. OP hasn't provided any clarity on this, so everyone is speculating. Your preferred theory is that he's refusing to support his stepson, but wouldn't treat his daughters the same way; can you point to anything from the OP that indicates this? No, you can't. So please get off your high horse about what "other people" are doing - you're doing the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Leave it to DCUM to turn what is step-parenting issue into yet another diatribe on stay-at-home parents.

I doubt the husband is going to take the same hard-line when his daughters go off to college. The fact is, when he married this woman, he took on some responsibility for his stepson. And he definitely took on some responsibility for his wife.

how you are all turning a simple case of a kid wanting a little bit of spending money into wht you turned it into is really quite amazing. And super hideous

(And nope. I'm not a stay-at-home mom. And yes I worked my ass off to college. But we don't really know the entire situation with this kid we're jumping to the conclusions that best fit our biases. It ain't cool.

Assuming this is a step-parenting issue is nearly as silly as assuming it is a SAHM issue. There are a multitude of reasons OP's husband could be reluctant to send additional funds to the student. OP hasn't provided any clarity on this, so everyone is speculating. Your preferred theory is that he's refusing to support his stepson, but wouldn't treat his daughters the same way; can you point to anything from the OP that indicates this? No, you can't. So please get off your high horse about what "other people" are doing - you're doing the same thing.

I also want to add that it's perfectly natural for him to support his bio daughters. His stepson is his wife's business.

[Anonymous]

Of course its natural for him to only want to pay for his bio kids. The step son has a bio father. Whats really surprising is that DCUM actually thinks the mom should be able to sit around all day and not bring in any income and still demand that her H pays for a grown adult's expenses. Crazy. He is in college... what a great time to learn how to be self sufficient!

[Anonymous]

I always love how DCUM will tell a stepparent they have to right to discipline their spouse's kid but are obliged to pay for the kid.