So much disappointment this week

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:CCO treats every school that’s 20% or less acceptance as a reach.

That's also just common sense.

Right? And anyone who had a kid go through this cycle and still thinks to the contrary is fooling themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

That's not data, that's one point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

So do you think the significant increase in URM students at top 20 schools is not real? If a significant number of students are lying than schools that claim 40-50% of incoming students as diverse is BS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

Report the friend, it happened at many schools. They will keep you anonymous. At the least, the school will know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

Report the friend, it happened at many schools. They will keep you anonymous. At the least, the school will know.

Yes, report to the college. This is wrong. And the college will thank you for doing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

Did they tell you they did this? Why would someone brag about this? It isn't right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parent of DC who applied last year. We said the same thing. The waitlists will move. They didn’t. Focus on the acceptances, have hope for the remaining, but don’t hold out for a waitlist. The chances are so small.

they may be small but still there, I know one kid from DC private that got off WL at Vandy in May couple of years ago

Really depends on the school, in recent years VT has accepted thousands off the waitlist and Lehigh has accepted 90% who opted to stay on the WL. Those who are trying hard to increase their yield/reputation and struggle to manage enrollment put a LOT of people on the waitlist and accept a lot who choose to stay on it. Sometimes a school swings back and forth--under-enrolls one year and has to take a lot of the WL, overenrolls the next and doesn't take any. But some schools just use the WL as a strategy always. With students having 20+ schools on the CommonApp, it's getting harder for schools to predict who will attend (other than ED acceptances).

Here's a list with some stats that give at least a rough sense of the variation:
https://admissionsight.com/the-odds-waitlisted-students-will-get-accepted/

VT significantly over accepted a couple of years ago and struggled mightily to accommodate the influx of freshman. They had a pattern of over-accepting followed by under-accepting. That was a bad mistake, and this is what a waitlist is intended to prevent. It is very difficult for schools to gauge exactly how many they need to accept because the dynamics are always changing with ED/RD and spikes in applicants. I believe VT's over enrollment caused the ripple effect of schools like JMU needing to go deeper into their waitlist than expected to fill their class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

So do you think the significant increase in URM students at top 20 schools is not real? If a significant number of students are lying than schools that claim 40-50% of incoming students as diverse is BS.

Well, a lot of the increase in "people of color" at selective schools has been due to an increase in the number of Asians, not in Blacks and Hispanics, which have been pretty stagnant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

Really think our neighbor might have. We know his grades and didn't submit test scores because they were so low and had someone else write his essay. It's crazy the school he was admitted too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

Excuse me, mom, but what do you mean that YOU failed your child? Were you sitting on the admissions committee at top 5 schools, sabotaging his applications? Genuinely curious as to what role you think you played?

Well, in retrospect, maybe I should have hired a college coach, maybe I should have researched the connected summer programs that apparently the well connected know to do (but I only heard about after really getting into the admissions process), this will sound terrible but being 100% factual on the application was likely a mistake. After recently seeing studies on the numbers of white families declaring URM on applications and the boost it gives, and/or the activity embellishment I now see goes on in the common app, it's resets the baseline. As an international student said and stuck with me- "it astonishes me that in the US, the most competitive college system in the world, they do "holistic" reviews which are totally unverified and essentially rely on the honor system". It was the right thing to do but my child was a pretty strong comparative disadvantage as a result.

What studies?

There are studies where white families declare they are URM - the families admit to it? Would love to see the cite.

My DC’s friend lied about race/ethnicity and got into an Ivy this year. So yeah people lie about all sorts of things and since no one cares to verify anything it seems to work

Hopefully, they never run for Office and they become labeled "Pocahontas" like Elizabeth Warren.

Honesty is always the best policy. You never know what will come back to get you years later.

[Anonymous]

This year has really proven to me how much college apps is just a lottery.

DD - Blair magnet -- wants an open curriculum school.

4.0 UW/4.75W; plenty of AP tests, significant leadership in a focused club, interesting mentoring that she's done. NMF, Presidential scholar nominee. And really, all-around - an empathetic human who really found herself during Covid and explained that emotional journey in one of her essays.

UMD Honors - half-tuition scholarship
Rejected: Yale, Amherst, Williams, Swathmore
Waitlisted: Wesleyan
Accepted at her other safety school with an interesting scholarship offer.
Waiting on two more selectives.

Maybe it's the test-optional/certain type of diversity (DD has a diversity aspect, but not necessarily the specific diversity sector that is currently being sought); maybe it's Covid deferrals. Maybe it's just that the names are thrown in a hat and are picked out...

We had a good conversation about how the 2 minutes that schools take to look at an application does not define four years of self-driven work, accomplishments and self-discovery as a human.

She is happy with the safety school. And she's not expecting much from the other two at this point. And she wasn't sad about rejections - she was angry that her type of diversity and voice were less valued and that the type of school she wants don't have enough openings/availability for the number of students qualified for them.

[Anonymous]

^ I’m sorry your DD is disappointed- this is definitely a difficult process. It sounds like she did not submit test scores? Also - what kind of diversity are you talking about - is it sexual orientation? If so, I think there may be good reasons that schools don’t factor that into decisions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This year has really proven to me how much college apps is just a lottery.

DD - Blair magnet -- wants an open curriculum school.

4.0 UW/4.75W; plenty of AP tests, significant leadership in a focused club, interesting mentoring that she's done. NMF, Presidential scholar nominee. And really, all-around - an empathetic human who really found herself during Covid and explained that emotional journey in one of her essays.

UMD Honors - half-tuition scholarship
Rejected: Yale, Amherst, Williams, Swathmore
Waitlisted: Wesleyan
Accepted at her other safety school with an interesting scholarship offer.
Waiting on two more selectives.

Maybe it's the test-optional/certain type of diversity (DD has a diversity aspect, but not necessarily the specific diversity sector that is currently being sought); maybe it's Covid deferrals. Maybe it's just that the names are thrown in a hat and are picked out...

We had a good conversation about how the 2 minutes that schools take to look at an application does not define four years of self-driven work, accomplishments and self-discovery as a human.

She is happy with the safety school. And she's not expecting much from the other two at this point. And she wasn't sad about rejections - she was angry that her type of diversity and voice were less valued and that the type of school she wants don't have enough openings/availability for the number of students qualified for them.

My sympathies to your daughter. It sucks, but I hope she will prove them all wrong and be tremendously successful in her future endeavors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This year has really proven to me how much college apps is just a lottery.

DD - Blair magnet -- wants an open curriculum school.

4.0 UW/4.75W; plenty of AP tests, significant leadership in a focused club, interesting mentoring that she's done. NMF, Presidential scholar nominee. And really, all-around - an empathetic human who really found herself during Covid and explained that emotional journey in one of her essays.

UMD Honors - half-tuition scholarship
Rejected: Yale, Amherst, Williams, Swathmore
Waitlisted: Wesleyan
Accepted at her other safety school with an interesting scholarship offer.
Waiting on two more selectives.

Maybe it's the test-optional/certain type of diversity (DD has a diversity aspect, but not necessarily the specific diversity sector that is currently being sought); maybe it's Covid deferrals. Maybe it's just that the names are thrown in a hat and are picked out...

We had a good conversation about how the 2 minutes that schools take to look at an application does not define four years of self-driven work, accomplishments and self-discovery as a human.

She is happy with the safety school. And she's not expecting much from the other two at this point. And she wasn't sad about rejections - she was angry that her type of diversity and voice were less valued and that the type of school she wants don't have enough openings/availability for the number of students qualified for them.

What kinds of ECs does she have?