Not having a second / vacation home makes me feel poor & depressed. Anyone else?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot tell you how liberating it was to sell our second home two years ago. I cannot overemphasize how much work/stress it was to maintain another home in a different area. Our visits were not enjoyable for me. It would take half a day to pack and load up the car myself and the kids. We arrive, spend another hour unpacking. Then, you either have to pack groceries or make a grocery run as soon as you get there. We’d spend a lot of time meeting with AC guys, dealing with the broken dishwasher, figuring out what else needed to be done. Then, when it was time to go, we’d spend the day cleaning out the refrigerator, taking out the trash, and either arranging for cleaners or cleaning ourselves. We spent an inordinate amount of our disposable income on things like a new roof or new AC unit for the second home. Also, we found ourselves almost never going due to kids sports, social obligations, etc.

I will never own a second home again unless I’m wealthy enough to buy a place with a second cottage and have full-time caregiver to take care of the house.

Yeah that’s why literally every rich family we know has more than one home. Because it’s such a chore. Much better to waste money and get scammed on Airbnb — and hope some creep owner didn’t install cameras all around the areas you and your kids undress. No thanks.

One of our staff members put dead raccoons in the chimney of our Hamptons house.

[Anonymous]

Insufferable post. Speechless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure why pp decided to dig up a three year old thread, but the difference in attitude between May 2020 (from the throes of the covid lock down) and now is pretty dramatic. From the peak of the pandemic, the second home market still has a long way to fall, IMO.

It's fascinating to read all the dunces chastising people for owning second homes. How stupid to lock in historic low 2% on a $700k vacation home now worth $1.7mn a few years later. Pissing away your money making the mortgage payments for airbnb and vrbo hosts is far smarter.

Are you still living in 2021? The short term rental market is saturated with the homes of people who bought second homes during Covid and now have to be back in the office. I’ve been watching several resort area markets and houses are sitting, even with price drops. It’s going to be interesting when all the people who bought investment properties on the basis of the rental history during Covid have to start making the payments on the mortgage out of pocket & decide they need to sell.

We don’t rent our beach place and never intend to. House is paid off and almost tripled in value. It is what it is. Glad we bought.

[Anonymous]

People who own 2nd & 3rd vacation homes don’t worry about maintenance, cleaning or security. That is all outsourced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With seemingly everyone who has one gone from their main residence right now, anyone else feel this way? Be honest.

Because honestly, this week I can't stop feeling "poor" (not literally, relatively) because we don't have a place to escape to. Relying on random invites to friends' and family vacation homes at this point in our life just feels so low and desperate. I don't care how much or how little financial sense it makes, we need a second home. I'm so over being trapped at home all year, fishing for invitations, or even renting for a week at a time. Perhaps this is the precise feeling that motivates so many to buy a second home?

Fishing for invites got real old once we hit our mid 30s. Makes you feel second class, like a leech. Especially once you have a kid or two. And renting is just flushing money down the drain. When you rent you're just lowly transients. The vibe is totally different when you own, when you know the neighbors, when your kids can grow up with neighbor kids. Being able to go away on a whim, there's nothing like it.

DCUM, never change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is hilarious because we spent the entire pandemic in our only home, which is a 1000 sq ft condo (three people, one dog). We know people with vacation homes. They honestly don’t seem happier or more personally fulfilled. Some don’t even seem to like their second home.

You really expect folks to talk about how amazing their vacation home is around you, who lacks a vacation and whose primary residence is a tiny condo? Get a clue. Not to mention discussing the vacation home around those without makes people fish for invites.

Is “fishing for invites” really a thing that happens beyond high school?

No kidding. I hate the invites because then I feel obligated to go eventually, and it is almost never as nice as a getaway to our own family spots.

This!! Our friends have a "beach house" that is quite a distance from the actual shoreline. It's a crappy house with other crappy houses for a view and they act like it's something special. I've been twice and have turned down a dozen more invitations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People who own 2nd & 3rd vacation homes don’t worry about maintenance, cleaning or security. That is all outsourced.

Not true at all. People who own but don't rent it out are on the hook for dealing with contractors, cleaners, etc. They have to drive out there to winterize, inspect for storm damage, etc. Plus, the area isn't exactly beautiful. Beaches in DelMarVa are mediocre, with cold, brown water, rough waves and rocky sand. I'll spend my money on flying to the Caribbean or Florida beaches with blue water, white sand and warm temps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who own 2nd & 3rd vacation homes don’t worry about maintenance, cleaning or security. That is all outsourced.

Not true at all. People who own but don't rent it out are on the hook for dealing with contractors, cleaners, etc. They have to drive out there to winterize, inspect for storm damage, etc. Plus, the area isn't exactly beautiful. Beaches in DelMarVa are mediocre, with cold, brown water, rough waves and rocky sand. I'll spend my money on flying to the Caribbean or Florida beaches with blue water, white sand and warm temps.

Your friends are poors, that’s why. Truly wealthy people aren’t doing any winterizing themselves, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I cannot tell you how liberating it was to sell our second home two years ago. I cannot overemphasize how much work/stress it was to maintain another home in a different area. Our visits were not enjoyable for me. It would take half a day to pack and load up the car myself and the kids. We arrive, spend another hour unpacking. Then, you either have to pack groceries or make a grocery run as soon as you get there. We’d spend a lot of time meeting with AC guys, dealing with the broken dishwasher, figuring out what else needed to be done. Then, when it was time to go, we’d spend the day cleaning out the refrigerator, taking out the trash, and either arranging for cleaners or cleaning ourselves. We spent an inordinate amount of our disposable income on things like a new roof or new AC unit for the second home. Also, we found ourselves almost never going due to kids sports, social obligations, etc.

I will never own a second home again unless I’m wealthy enough to buy a place with a second cottage and have full-time caregiver to take care of the house.

Why are you doing so much packing when you go to your own home? Keep extras of toiletries and personal items and maybe even some clothes to minimize the packing and unpacking. I don’t understand about cleaning out the fridge, too. Did you only visit a couple of times/year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot tell you how liberating it was to sell our second home two years ago. I cannot overemphasize how much work/stress it was to maintain another home in a different area. Our visits were not enjoyable for me. It would take half a day to pack and load up the car myself and the kids. We arrive, spend another hour unpacking. Then, you either have to pack groceries or make a grocery run as soon as you get there. We’d spend a lot of time meeting with AC guys, dealing with the broken dishwasher, figuring out what else needed to be done. Then, when it was time to go, we’d spend the day cleaning out the refrigerator, taking out the trash, and either arranging for cleaners or cleaning ourselves. We spent an inordinate amount of our disposable income on things like a new roof or new AC unit for the second home. Also, we found ourselves almost never going due to kids sports, social obligations, etc.

I will never own a second home again unless I’m wealthy enough to buy a place with a second cottage and have full-time caregiver to take care of the house.

Why are you doing so much packing when you go to your own home? Keep extras of toiletries and personal items and maybe even some clothes to minimize the packing and unpacking. I don’t understand about cleaning out the fridge, too. Did you only visit a couple of times/year?

NP we have a few boxes of our toiletries, extra clothes, linens so we just have to go there with groceries and some clothing. But then we do need to clean the place when we leave because we also rent it out and most times feel its a waste of money paying for cleaners after us. And there is always something to take care of or maintain while we are there.

[Anonymous]

No, I’m the opposite: having a second home to maintain would depress me (and probably make me feel poor).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I’m the opposite: having a second home to maintain would depress me (and probably make me feel poor).

Only people who are house poor need to spend any energy or time maintaining their second home. People who can really afford one don’t need to lift a finger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot tell you how liberating it was to sell our second home two years ago. I cannot overemphasize how much work/stress it was to maintain another home in a different area. Our visits were not enjoyable for me. It would take half a day to pack and load up the car myself and the kids. We arrive, spend another hour unpacking. Then, you either have to pack groceries or make a grocery run as soon as you get there. We’d spend a lot of time meeting with AC guys, dealing with the broken dishwasher, figuring out what else needed to be done. Then, when it was time to go, we’d spend the day cleaning out the refrigerator, taking out the trash, and either arranging for cleaners or cleaning ourselves. We spent an inordinate amount of our disposable income on things like a new roof or new AC unit for the second home. Also, we found ourselves almost never going due to kids sports, social obligations, etc.

I will never own a second home again unless I’m wealthy enough to buy a place with a second cottage and have full-time caregiver to take care of the house.

Why are you doing so much packing when you go to your own home? Keep extras of toiletries and personal items and maybe even some clothes to minimize the packing and unpacking. I don’t understand about cleaning out the fridge, too. Did you only visit a couple of times/year?

Bingo. PP is a troll.

[Anonymous]

"fishing for invitations" ?? Op, how about you pay for a hotel

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot tell you how liberating it was to sell our second home two years ago. I cannot overemphasize how much work/stress it was to maintain another home in a different area. Our visits were not enjoyable for me. It would take half a day to pack and load up the car myself and the kids. We arrive, spend another hour unpacking. Then, you either have to pack groceries or make a grocery run as soon as you get there. We’d spend a lot of time meeting with AC guys, dealing with the broken dishwasher, figuring out what else needed to be done. Then, when it was time to go, we’d spend the day cleaning out the refrigerator, taking out the trash, and either arranging for cleaners or cleaning ourselves. We spent an inordinate amount of our disposable income on things like a new roof or new AC unit for the second home. Also, we found ourselves almost never going due to kids sports, social obligations, etc.

I will never own a second home again unless I’m wealthy enough to buy a place with a second cottage and have full-time caregiver to take care of the house.

Why are you doing so much packing when you go to your own home? Keep extras of toiletries and personal items and maybe even some clothes to minimize the packing and unpacking. I don’t understand about cleaning out the fridge, too. Did you only visit a couple of times/year?

+1. That makes no sense. Our multi-million friends are rich but not like mega wealthy and they just have a local woman who cleans, does laundry, and stocks the pantry, fridge and liquor/wine when they're en route. I assume they're just paying the house cleaner an extra hundred bucks or so to do a Target or grocery store drive-thru pickup. That's an insignificant sum of money to have everything stocked when you get there.