How old were you when you first had sex?

[Anonymous]

17. We dated a few years, but we broke up because of his cheating and alcohol problems. No, I last saw him at a HS reunion. He told me he still loves me. I married another person. He is still single.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:25 late bloomer. However I am very religious. We are Facebook friends

You can't be that religious if you had sex outside of marriage

Just because I committed a sin doesn't mean I'm not that religious. I'm perfectly aware that I could burn in hell for what I did. I still believe in God. Just because I make mistakes doesn't mean I stop believing in my religion.

I would relax about the whole "burning in hell" thing if I were you. I don't mean to mock your religion, but it is a bit childish.

Childish ? I worry about it everyday. Not just the sex thing of course but every mistake I've ever made. Burning in hell is real, most people won't go to heaven. Where else do we all go ? Hell. I refuse to have kids because of it. I can't imagine creating someone who will one day be on fire for all eternity.

Isn't having kids a sacrament for Catholics, though? (I assume you're Catholic?)

I never heard of anyone not having kids in order to spare them from the inevitability of hell. That sounds like a hard thing to way around with - true or not, it sounds true to you, which must give you lots of anxiety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When does it stop being sex and start being rape or assault or something? Younger than 16 strikes me as very questionable in terms of whether someone is mature enough to legitimately consent to sex. Certainly pre-teens fit in this category in my thinking. So, 13-15?

Age matters too. A 15 and 16 year old having sex does bother me nearly as much as, say, a 15 and 18 year old.

I was 15. It was definitely consensual.

We weren't dating, but were friends before and friends after. I haven't seen him in many years, but I'm sure if we ran into each other today it would be fine.

My senior year in HS I had a boyfriend who was awesome, and we had a lot more sex (and a much worse breakup - I was terrible to him right before we left for college). I don't know if he'd be happy to see me, lo these 25 years later. Probably he wouldn't recognize me, I guess, seeing as now I'm as old as our parents were at the time he and I dated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:25 late bloomer. However I am very religious. We are Facebook friends

You can't be that religious if you had sex outside of marriage

Just because I committed a sin doesn't mean I'm not that religious. I'm perfectly aware that I could burn in hell for what I did. I still believe in God. Just because I make mistakes doesn't mean I stop believing in my religion.

I would relax about the whole "burning in hell" thing if I were you. I don't mean to mock your religion, but it is a bit childish.

Childish ? I worry about it everyday. Not just the sex thing of course but every mistake I've ever made. Burning in hell is real, most people won't go to heaven. Where else do we all go ? Hell. I refuse to have kids because of it. I can't imagine creating someone who will one day be on fire for all eternity.

Isn't having kids a sacrament for Catholics, though? (I assume you're Catholic?)

I never heard of anyone not having kids in order to spare them from the inevitability of hell. That sounds like a hard thing to way around with - true or not, it sounds true to you, which must give you lots of anxiety.

Why would you assume she's catholic? We're not big on the "hell" talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:17. We dated a few years, but we broke up because of his cheating and alcohol problems. No, I last saw him at a HS reunion. He told me he still loves me. I married another person. He is still single.

Sad

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When does it stop being sex and start being rape or assault or something? Younger than 16 strikes me as very questionable in terms of whether someone is mature enough to legitimately consent to sex. Certainly pre-teens fit in this category in my thinking. So, 13-15?

Age matters too. A 15 and 16 year old having sex does bother me nearly as much as, say, a 15 and 18 year old.

One of the PPs who was 14. The guy was 15 and in the same grade as me, so not a big age gap. It was totally consensual. Agreed that anyone 18+ who sleeps with a 14 or 15 year old is creepy.

[Anonymous]

I was 22. Was mortified to graduate college a virgin, but in retrospect so glad I didn't lose it to any of the losers I dated while actually in college. None of them deserved that honor. Not still in touch with the guy I did, but he was a cool guy, hopefully he's doing well and happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was 22. Was mortified to graduate college a virgin, but in retrospect so glad I didn't lose it to any of the losers I dated while actually in college. None of them deserved that honor. Not still in touch with the guy I did, but he was a cool guy, hopefully he's doing well and happy.

Very similar, except I was 23 and had taken two years off from college so still had a good bit before graduating.

I feel the same. I had only realized I wanted to lose it like 6 months before. I was dating someone I was really in love with, but we had a rocky relationship, and he was like a stud on campus, and part of me worried that it would just be a trophy to him, IDK. So we broke up, I think partly cause he got sick of waiting, and I found a new boyfriend and lost it to him like a month later. Guy I loved with kept contacting me, trying to get back, but I was just worried- he had dated a LOT of women. I realize now how much he cared for me, but at the time I thought it was just an act, I guess I was kind of paranoid. Anyway, sometimes I wonder what it would have been like to lose it to him, instead of someone I just liked, but I think it would have been too emotional and overwhelming for me, losing it to someone I loved. I was glad the way it happened- i was totally in control and there weren't too many emotions. It all felt very safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:25 late bloomer. However I am very religious. We are Facebook friends

You can't be that religious if you had sex outside of marriage

Just because I committed a sin doesn't mean I'm not that religious. I'm perfectly aware that I could burn in hell for what I did. I still believe in God. Just because I make mistakes doesn't mean I stop believing in my religion.

I would relax about the whole "burning in hell" thing if I were you. I don't mean to mock your religion, but it is a bit childish.

Childish ? I worry about it everyday. Not just the sex thing of course but every mistake I've ever made. Burning in hell is real, most people won't go to heaven. Where else do we all go ? Hell. I refuse to have kids because of it. I can't imagine creating someone who will one day be on fire for all eternity.

Isn't having kids a sacrament for Catholics, though? (I assume you're Catholic?)

I never heard of anyone not having kids in order to spare them from the inevitability of hell. That sounds like a hard thing to way around with - true or not, it sounds true to you, which must give you lots of anxiety.

Why would you assume she's catholic? We're not big on the "hell" talk.

Hi - this is that PP. I guess ignorance on my part - I thought that kind of language was from Catholicism. Do you know what part of Christianity - or what other religions - would leave a person worrying about Hell like that?

(I'm Jewish so it's all Greek to me and an honest mistake.)

[Anonymous]

28 on my wedding night. Still at it, he's snoring his ass off right here while I'm awake in bed trying to figure out how to get the cpap on him lol