I'm an African American. Ask me anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

ManHere wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"BTW, in case you didn't know not all white people are ambitious and there are plenty of black people that are more ambitious than whites. "

I think the average middle class white person is more ambitious than the average middle class black person, but I'd like to understand why.

Well, I know a hell of a lot of white women who either are or desperately want to be stay at home moms. I don't know a single black stay at home mom among my middle/upper middle class friends. The black women I know - we work hard.

OP here. Danm. Almost got through a DCUM topic without bringing up the SAHM discussion .

I was thinking the same thing And I know several middle class AA SAHMs who work very hard! One of them even home schools her three kids.

Black SAHM here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I saw a bit on 60 minutes a while ago where they had a panel of AAs and they were talking about being teased in school if they did well as "acting white".

Is that true or have you experienced that?

This is overplayed. People don't say that much anymore. Plus, not really sure why only blacks are accused of harassing smart people. There are MANY white kids that are teased for being nerds.

I was smart in school and was never teased. The kids that were teased were geeks (and they weren't always smart). I would wager that folks who were accused of "acting white" were Carlton (from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air) type black kids. In these instances white=yuppy, preppy, bourgeois, etc.

It must depend on the area, because I don't think it's overplayed. I was in high school within the past decade and was teased terribly for talking and acting white (and acting white was getting good grades). It only came from the lower-income black kids, so although I hated them then, I'm forgiving and understanding of why they acted that way now.

I was raised in the projects of SE, DC. I was also very smart. Went to DCPS. Never saw anyone teased for being smart (not many people were going around asking what grades everyone got). The kids I saw being teased were the dorks (sometimes they also were smart, but not always). There are plenty of cool smart kids who don't get teased. If you were/are smart and you got teased, it probably has more to do with you also being a dork and/or socially awkward.

Also, the acting white thing is usually just synonymous with acting preppy, superior and/or bourgeois. The "acting white" insult has more to do with being lame and/or uncool than it did to being smart.

And what I'm saying is that that must have been true, in *your* area. In mine, high academic achievement was looked down upon period. I wasn't preppy and didn't act superior, although I'm sure some of them had inferiority complexes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"BTW, in case you didn't know not all white people are ambitious and there are plenty of black people that are more ambitious than whites. "

I think the average middle class white person is more ambitious than the average middle class black person, but I'd like to understand why.

If they are both average and middle class, wouldn't they have the same level of ambition? Not sure what you are trying to ask here...?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:See, all the weed talk (by women at that), makes me say that black people are ghetto. Ugh...

Whatever, you know that most of the people being serviced by the DC "Nancy Botwin's" are mostly white. Are they ghetto too?

Weed transcends all racial and socioeconomic lines. But assuming that a black person who smokes weed is ghetto...what does that make you?

Nancy Botwins, not Nancy Botwin's - it's NOT the possessive. Arrrrgggghhhh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"BTW, in case you didn't know not all white people are ambitious and there are plenty of black people that are more ambitious than whites. "

I think the average middle class white person is more ambitious than the average middle class black person, but I'd like to understand why.

If they are both average and middle class, wouldn't they have the same level of ambition? Not sure what you are trying to ask here...?

Of course not. There are middle class people who are upwardly mobile, and those content to be PAs so they can more easily balance family and work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get why many AA women are anti-fro.

If I were AA, I'd go natural.

FWIW, I'm white, and I'm graying. And I don't give a rat's ass what people think.

Not interested in an Afro at all. Believe it or not, going natural is pretty high-maintenance. I'd look ridiculous with a bush. And I look like a teenager with braids, so I shy away from braided hairstyles.

I think it varies. I wear my hair natural, and it takes very little maintenance. Pretty much wash and go with a little leave in conditioner.

Very true. I have Type 4 natural hair, so yeah......wearing it natural would be a bit of a maintenance challenge!!

Type 4 hair, very kinky... Not a challenge for me. I know it varies from person to person, but it's pretty low-maintenance. And it doesn't look like a bush. I see lots of women in my area with all kids of natural hair and I very rarely see unattractively-styled heads of hair.

Also, given this country's history I am uncomfortable presenting the image that my hair is so unmanageably that I'm willing to use caustic chemicals to make it do the opposite of what it does naturally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"BTW, in case you didn't know not all white people are ambitious and there are plenty of black people that are more ambitious than whites. "

I think the average middle class white person is more ambitious than the average middle class black person, but I'd like to understand why.

If they are both average and middle class, wouldn't they have the same level of ambition? Not sure what you are trying to ask here...?

Of course not. There are middle class people who are upwardly mobile, and those content to be PAs so they can more easily balance family and work.

How does that indicate ambition? The only thing that says is that some people are more interested in building wealth while others are more interested in building family. You can't take money with you; I'll chose family every time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get why many AA women are anti-fro.

If I were AA, I'd go natural.

FWIW, I'm white, and I'm graying. And I don't give a rat's ass what people think.

Not interested in an Afro at all. Believe it or not, going natural is pretty high-maintenance. I'd look ridiculous with a bush. And I look like a teenager with braids, so I shy away from braided hairstyles.

I think it varies. I wear my hair natural, and it takes very little maintenance. Pretty much wash and go with a little leave in conditioner.

Very true. I have Type 4 natural hair, so yeah......wearing it natural would be a bit of a maintenance challenge!!

Type 4 hair, very kinky... Not a challenge for me. I know it varies from person to person, but it's pretty low-maintenance. And it doesn't look like a bush. I see lots of women in my area with all kids of natural hair and I very rarely see unattractively-styled heads of hair.

Also, given this country's history I am uncomfortable presenting the image that my hair is so unmanageably that I'm willing to use caustic chemicals to make it do the opposite of what it does naturally.

I agree. I personally love a great perm, but I also love the natural look on others. During the height of Lauryn Hill's career, I was tempted to get dreads, but I don't think I can pull them off. Black hair in its natural state is beautiful.

[Anonymous]

I find it very interesting that many AA women prioritize their hair over physical fitness. Is it really worth it to have straight hair if you can't exercise?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it very interesting that many AA women prioritize their hair over physical fitness. Is it really worth it to have straight hair if you can't exercise?

But many of those women have careers that find dreadlocks, cornrows, and natural hair unacceptable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it very interesting that many AA women prioritize their hair over physical fitness. Is it really worth it to have straight hair if you can't exercise?

I don't know if anyone said "many". Yes, I guess some do prioritize hair over exercise, but many people of all colors prioritize things over exercise. I doubt women who don't exercise due to their hair have the hair as their only excuse. If it wasn't the hair, it would be something else.

[Anonymous]

"How does that indicate ambition? The only thing that says is that some people are more interested in building wealth while others are more interested in building family. You can't take money with you; I'll chose family every time."

Ambition is not just wealth creation; it's an interest in position and title and power.

It's okay, you know, to say you'd rather spend time with your family. It just means you're not as ambitious as someone putting in more hours and trying to get ahead in the workplace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't get why many AA women are anti-fro.

If I were AA, I'd go natural.

FWIW, I'm white, and I'm graying. And I don't give a rat's ass what people think.

yeah, it's easy for you to say that, never having been discriminated against because of the way you look. A giant afro doesn't fly in many professional establishments. They don't tell you this of course because it's not PC but the bias is still there.

And it's not always about what people think, sometimes it's about
1. what looks flattering on you
2. how manageable your natural hair is. My afro is very thick and dense, I also have a very tender scalp so combing through my
natural hair has always been a painful nightmare.

[Anonymous]

I don't use the N-word, and don't approve of its use.

I'm just sayin'. (AA female)

[Anonymous]

What does "natural" hair look like? Does any one famous have natural AA hair so I can google a pic?