It's official: Gen Z are not delaying marriage til 30s anymore, young weddings are cool again

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I bet all these young folks divorce. No one has the tenacity for marriage anymore. People put their own “journey” before the hardcore commitment a marriage takes. Everyone is so opinionated and sure of themselves. Let’s see these marriages in a decade. There is no residency in this generation.

Only a damaged, bitter, and jaded person sees beautiful wedding photos of a gorgeous young couple and impulsively predicts (let’s be honest, you hope for) a divorce. I honestly feel sorry for you and anyone else spamming similar. You’re projecting your own baggage onto these madly in love and glowing young people.

I’m being real. You should, too.

The divorce rate is already 55%. And with Me Too and women not taking any perceived sht anymore from men, obsessive “self-care”, young people’s obsession with mental health and proudly wearing their anxiety on their sleeve, and just normal trends, we’re going to see many of these young marriages fail. I’m sorry you can’t handle reality.

I can tell you’re either never married or still bitter about your own messy divorce. Throwing around the alleged 55% divorce rate in this context is ignorant. Affluent college educated people who marry early have the most successful marriages, according to the data.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:It's funny that old people think that women shouldn't get married until after 30, so controlling

I think my kids should get married whenever they feel like they’ve met someone they want to marry. If that’s at 22, so be it. But I’m getting the sense that the posters who are most supportive of young marriages are the controlling ones. These are the parents who have carefully controlled their kids’ friendships since preschool, making sure they only ever mix with the “right” families. The marriage to the appropriate partner is essentially what they’ve been building up to.

I mean, this sounds “controlling” to you but it sounds smart to me? After a certain age we know that kids’ peers have more influence on them than their parents. Trying to make sure your kids interact with kids whose parents share your particular values just seems like common sense.

Of course I want my kid with an appropriate partner- don’t you?? I mean, be honest with yourself, would you be happy to be mother of the bride at Lana del Ray’s bayou wedding? I would not.

Can you all conceive of real relationships without comparing to celebrities?

And it doesn’t just sound controlling, it is controlling. I trust my kids to figure what an appropriate partner means to them. Just as both my parents and my IL’s did for my husband and me. If our parents had exerted any kind of control on the type of people we married, we probably would have ended up with very different people, and we would have been miserable.

Celebrities and rich influencers are the Generation Z trendsetters. Trends spread like wildfire on TikTok and Instagram. Millie, Sophia Ritchie, and Joey King have over 100 million followers. If you don’t think young people are influenced when they see these gorgeous weddings and the young rich wife/mom aesthetic you are in denial. The wisest college kids are dating to marry and are repelled at the idea of being unmarried and childless at 30 — or using an app to meet a husband.

No, the wisest college kids are there for academic and professional pursuits. MS not MRS.

I’m not sure why you believe finding a good partner would negate this somehow. My smartest classmates did.

Because the goal of college is to learn and develop skills. Not get a husband.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:20-yo Millie Bobby Brown and 22-yo husband (Bon Jovi's model son) just revealed their gorgeous wedding photos on social media to her 65 million followers. MBB is a trend setter. This follows influencer Sofia Richie getting married and quickly pregnant last year when she was just 24-yo. Pendulum has swung, gen Z'ers consider it is un-cool and weird to wait until late 20s or 30s to settle down.

If your impulse is to be disgusted by this and predict the demise of these marriages you just reveal yourself to be a terminally miserable person. Every parent wishes their child finds love at this age. Buy a house. Have kids. Make a life together.

The “Sex and the City” whoring around until your 30s, blowing money renting apartments and dining out, and binge drinking your prime away was always a scam. Good to see young people wising up.

Bad idea to use Hollywood and celebrity to prove your point. They will let you down.
I wish MBB the best, like her as an actress, but hope this rush to marriage was not caused by some trauma in her short life due to her being involved in acting and Hollywood from a very young age.

Marrying at a young adult age humans have done for thousands of years…teases out issues and trauma. 90s and 00s era delay marriage until your 30s, settling with a schmuck because the dating pool is empty, needing IVF to get pregnant, being a tired feeling and old looking mom at your kid’s school, and likely dying before you see your kids marry let alone have grandkids are…sharp life choices. Sure, sure.

Yes, instead they should marry that schmuck when they're 22.

Newsflash but if more people are getting married earlier (which, for the record, the only evidence of on this thread is MBB marrying a Bon Jovi) then that means that some of those 30-something schmucks are joining the early 20s marriage pool. Because it's not like more better guys are appearing out of thin air at age 22. So people are just marrying the same dud men, at earlier ages when they are even more immature and useless than their 30 year old self (who at least knows how to use the dishwasher and w/d).

And for the record! I met DH when i was in college, him in grad school and I married at 26. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it, but i do think having some kind of agenda at age 22 to find marriage material is bizarre.

Of course people would be far better off marrying the same person they settled for in their 30s five or ten years sooner. You’d have ten years of equity in your house, your kids would be in elementary school, you’d be closer to retirement, you’d be healthier. You wouldn’t have all that trauma and baggage from failed relationships in your 20s.

I hate to break it to you, but that’s not how most people view their 20s. Most of us were having a blast. No “trauma”. And just because a relationship doesn’t end in marriage doesn’t mean it “failed”. I enjoyed my relationships in college and early 20s (still friends with some) but I’m so glad I didn’t marry them. You don’t have to settle for the first guys you meet because you’re desperate to get married.

NP but I got married in my early 20’s to my first boyfriend (dated since we were 18). Not because I was desperate to get married, but because I loved him and wanted to marry him and wasn’t interested in seeing if maybe the grass might be greener somewhere else. I believe he felt the same way.

We still managed to have a blast in our 20’s - we just did it together. We’ve been together for over 20 years now and we have learned how to be adults and how to be parents together. No regrets.

That is gross. 🤮

Pp are you being sarcastic? How could that possibly be gross?

I got married at 29, but I would gladly have sooner if I had met the right one earlier. I was unpacking trauma, unfortunately, in my teens and early 20's so I wasn't attracted to healthy men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reality flash to all these folks who are going in to debt in a bad job market to have a perfect tik tok wedding, y’all, first of all, should wait until you’re 30 at the youngest to get married and secondly hold the wedding at an Outback Steakhouse and invest the actual $25k or whatever expensive amount it would have cost and invest it in UPRO and TMF during a market downturn. You’ll be millionaires in 20 years, have less debt and generally smarter.

Yes, wait to get married so you miss out on once in a lifetime interest rates and houses soaring in value. The now 30-40 year olds who followed this advice will forever be behind their peers who married right after college, bought a house with two incomes, and popped out kids with ease.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I bet all these young folks divorce. No one has the tenacity for marriage anymore. People put their own “journey” before the hardcore commitment a marriage takes. Everyone is so opinionated and sure of themselves. Let’s see these marriages in a decade. There is no residency in this generation.

Only a damaged, bitter, and jaded person sees beautiful wedding photos of a gorgeous young couple and impulsively predicts (let’s be honest, you hope for) a divorce. I honestly feel sorry for you and anyone else spamming similar. You’re projecting your own baggage onto these madly in love and glowing young people.

I’m being real. You should, too.

The divorce rate is already 55%. And with Me Too and women not taking any perceived sht anymore from men, obsessive “self-care”, young people’s obsession with mental health and proudly wearing their anxiety on their sleeve, and just normal trends, we’re going to see many of these young marriages fail. I’m sorry you can’t handle reality.

I can tell you’re either never married or still bitter about your own messy divorce. Throwing around the alleged 55% divorce rate in this context is ignorant. Affluent college educated people who marry early have the most successful marriages, according to the data.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I bet all these young folks divorce. No one has the tenacity for marriage anymore. People put their own “journey” before the hardcore commitment a marriage takes. Everyone is so opinionated and sure of themselves. Let’s see these marriages in a decade. There is no residency in this generation.

Only a damaged, bitter, and jaded person sees beautiful wedding photos of a gorgeous young couple and impulsively predicts (let’s be honest, you hope for) a divorce. I honestly feel sorry for you and anyone else spamming similar. You’re projecting your own baggage onto these madly in love and glowing young people.

Or someone who is good at statistics. How many Hollywood marriages last more than 10 years? How many Hollywood marriages of people under 25 last more than 10 years. Can you name a single one? I don’t think I can.
I’m actually happy for them. Liz Taylor once made a comment that people should feel glad for her that she fell in love so many times. It’s a wonderful sign of hope — these people willing to say “I love you” even knowing it probably won’t last. If you spend your life waiting for the person that will be “forever” you might just spend your life alone. These people are super rich so there’s really no downside to a 5 year or 10 year marriage. If it lasts longer, great! Hope it does!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it’s all part of this weirdness.

https://www.vanityfair.com/style/story/ballerina-farm-jd-vance-babies

Sounds good on paper but leads to heartache for a lot of women. It’s becoming a status symbol to have tons of kids. To do that you need to start earlier.

It could be rewarding, but it's also pretty high risk. I have a friend, educated and smart, who got married right out of college and had 5 kids by 30 who sounded a lot like OP, convinced she knew all there was to know about life. It's been humbling to divorce at 35, try to restart a career that never really took off, and try to get back into the dating world. If you think a 30 year old single is bringing baggage into a relationship think about what the above is like on the dating market late 30s. Bleak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it’s all part of this weirdness.

https://www.vanityfair.com/style/story/ballerina-farm-jd-vance-babies

Sounds good on paper but leads to heartache for a lot of women. It’s becoming a status symbol to have tons of kids. To do that you need to start earlier.

It could be rewarding, but it's also pretty high risk. I have a friend, educated and smart, who got married right out of college and had 5 kids by 30 who sounded a lot like OP, convinced she knew all there was to know about life. It's been humbling to divorce at 35, try to restart a career that never really took off, and try to get back into the dating world. If you think a 30 year old single is bringing baggage into a relationship think about what the above is like on the dating market late 30s. Bleak.

I also have a friend who married right out of college, had four kids by 30, and divorced by 35. She married what seemed like the perfect guy from a family within her religion, and there was no divorce in either family. It was so unexpected. She has no time or interest in dating as she's barely keeping afloat between parenting and work.

[Anonymous]

Isolate the cohort this forum cares about. The divorce rate of college educated UMC and UC young adults who walked down the aisle between the ages of 22 to 26 with someone they dated in college is closer to 10%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I bet all these young folks divorce. No one has the tenacity for marriage anymore. People put their own “journey” before the hardcore commitment a marriage takes. Everyone is so opinionated and sure of themselves. Let’s see these marriages in a decade. There is no residency in this generation.

Only a damaged, bitter, and jaded person sees beautiful wedding photos of a gorgeous young couple and impulsively predicts (let’s be honest, you hope for) a divorce. I honestly feel sorry for you and anyone else spamming similar. You’re projecting your own baggage onto these madly in love and glowing young people.

Or someone who is good at statistics. How many Hollywood marriages last more than 10 years? How many Hollywood marriages of people under 25 last more than 10 years. Can you name a single one? I don’t think I can.
I’m actually happy for them. Liz Taylor once made a comment that people should feel glad for her that she fell in love so many times. It’s a wonderful sign of hope — these people willing to say “I love you” even knowing it probably won’t last. If you spend your life waiting for the person that will be “forever” you might just spend your life alone. These people are super rich so there’s really no downside to a 5 year or 10 year marriage. If it lasts longer, great! Hope it does!

Hahaha! Make it more obvious you’re a bitter fed or consultant with a pointless email/zoom/excel career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Isolate the cohort this forum cares about. The divorce rate of college educated UMC and UC young adults who walked down the aisle between the ages of 22 to 26 with someone they dated in college is closer to 10%.

Source?

[Anonymous]

I'm definitely not going to read the entire 18 page thread, and someone likely has made this point already, but it takes a very . . . special kind of intellect to read that two very affluent, successful 20-somethings are getting married and draw sweeping conclusions about an entire generation from that.

Said more succinctly . . . OP, you're an idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it’s all part of this weirdness.

https://www.vanityfair.com/style/story/ballerina-farm-jd-vance-babies

Sounds good on paper but leads to heartache for a lot of women. It’s becoming a status symbol to have tons of kids. To do that you need to start earlier.

It could be rewarding, but it's also pretty high risk. I have a friend, educated and smart, who got married right out of college and had 5 kids by 30 who sounded a lot like OP, convinced she knew all there was to know about life. It's been humbling to divorce at 35, try to restart a career that never really took off, and try to get back into the dating world. If you think a 30 year old single is bringing baggage into a relationship think about what the above is like on the dating market late 30s. Bleak.

Regardless of age or career, try dating when you have 5 kids…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm definitely not going to read the entire 18 page thread, and someone likely has made this point already, but it takes a very . . . special kind of intellect to read that two very affluent, successful 20-somethings are getting married and draw sweeping conclusions about an entire generation from that.

Said more succinctly . . . OP, you're an idiot.

Are they even both successful? She is a successful former child actress who seems to be bankable as an adult. He is a nepo baby who does … modeling?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I bet all these young folks divorce. No one has the tenacity for marriage anymore. People put their own “journey” before the hardcore commitment a marriage takes. Everyone is so opinionated and sure of themselves. Let’s see these marriages in a decade. There is no residency in this generation.

Only a damaged, bitter, and jaded person sees beautiful wedding photos of a gorgeous young couple and impulsively predicts (let’s be honest, you hope for) a divorce. I honestly feel sorry for you and anyone else spamming similar. You’re projecting your own baggage onto these madly in love and glowing young people.

Or someone who is good at statistics. How many Hollywood marriages last more than 10 years? How many Hollywood marriages of people under 25 last more than 10 years. Can you name a single one? I don’t think I can.
I’m actually happy for them. Liz Taylor once made a comment that people should feel glad for her that she fell in love so many times. It’s a wonderful sign of hope — these people willing to say “I love you” even knowing it probably won’t last. If you spend your life waiting for the person that will be “forever” you might just spend your life alone. These people are super rich so there’s really no downside to a 5 year or 10 year marriage. If it lasts longer, great! Hope it does!

What do the statistics say about unmarried American millennials?

- depressed
- abusing SSRIs and alcohol and weed
- addicted to video games and online gambling
- high suicide rate
- highest ever % living at home with parents
- don’t have a pot to piss in
- record low birth rate, under replacement levels
- will probably never own a house
- doom swiping dating apps

I’m sure they’re all glad they pissed away their college years and prime 20s not dating to marry when they had a chance. Gen Z has wised up.