are "racist text message acceptable now?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:This thread is 12 pages long and I believe there hasn't yet been one non white person who said that they were ok with their friends making fun of their race growing up even if they laughed and went along with it at the time.

But sure keeping on with the jokes...

I’m guessing there aren’t enough non whites on this site to make a case either way

At least 2 people have said they were not okay with it. But I guess you don't want to listen.

What matters is the people involved. Not sure why this is so hard to understand. Different norms for different groups. That’s what this is about.

And the point is you can't know that all the people involved ARE ok with it. Or that other people they say that sh!t to will be ok with it.

You know that your white child is ok with it, and that your white child says POC are ok with it. Why are we trusting what white dudes have to say about racism and not the minorities getting made fun of by these white kids?

If you’re not ok with it, you speak up. You don’t silence everyone else on your behalf. That’s absurd.

This has been spoken about already - kids don't always like being the contrarian or outlier. Saying "hey that makes me uncomfortable" is not easy for all kids, especially being the minority being made fun of. Many of these "friends" are just bullies in disguise.

But I do agree they should. And I think that people should respect that they are uncomfortable with it. PPs are just saying "thats the way the world is now, suck it up" but that isnt true for most places or kids here. It's from a very few privileged white folk who post here, not really an accurate cross section of... anything.

Only you matter? Right? You think so highly of yourself and your voice.

I have no idea where you saw that written. Did you get into the wine already?

You have decided that you know what's true and what's "not true for most places or kids" which is very amusing as people tell you differently. What's next, you tell us why teens shouldn't like the music they like? And look at you tossing out stereotypes. Not a lot of evolved thinking going on there, just knee jerk reactions. Typical.

I havent decided anything, I've just read the demographics of this site. It's not representative, it's very skewed and biased. Which is fine, nothing against that. But you can't possibly say that this is how the world is when you've only seen your tiny (white) bubble.

I think teens have been provocative and said things for shock value since the beginning of time. That you don't like it is irrelevant, they do it because of this pearl clutching. People are taking it far too seriously.

What I like or dislike is irrelevant. What is considered racist and how that affects people is absolutely relevant.

Ok. But again and again the people in here talking about their teens are saying this is what they're doing and they think it's fine. What's the problem? If the teens were saying they were being bullied by their friends then you might have a point.

You don't see the issue of having white children (the children of pps) telling their white parents that their POC friends are totally fine with their racist jokes? You have no idea how POC are actually feeling about these, and have argued against adult POC pps who try to share their experiences.

I'm not talking about me at all, I'm just saying that white teen boys aren't necessarily the most reliable source on how POC feel about racist jokes.

You're making it all about you. If a POC wants to chime in and say they have seen this alarming trend and their kids are upset about it then by all means let's have that conversation. But so far that's not happening. But you sure are spoiling for that fight!

You really like to use that phrase, that I/we (since you're responding to multiple people) making it about ourselves. In fact it is the opposite, as you are the one saying it's fine and everyone should be fine with it, simply because you do. Well no, not everyone is going to be ok with your racist kids telling racist jokes that they probably learned from their racist parents.

I feel like the same people who talk about common decency in the outfit threads or flight threads are the same people who come here and say f*** everyone else, I will tell racist jokes and IDGAF what anyone thinks. Such an odd dichotomy.

What people talk about amongst themselves really isn't your problem. Do you always insert yourself into private conversations to tell people how they should feel about things? Do you tell women they should be ashamed of how they are dressed because you would never dress that way? That's messed up. The kids are joking with each other. You aren't part of their conversations and don't actually get a vote.

This is the only reasonable response in this thread. The world would most likely be a better place if more people knew how to just mind their own business.

But the only way to feel morally superior is to insert yourself whenever you can and tell people how you think it’s supposed to be.

That busybody PP can't seem to just let the teens be. I'm not sure what she expects parents to do. The teens I know are good about standing up for themselves and dealing with these things as they come up. If one crosses the line they will be swiftly put in their place by the others. I'm all for natural consequences.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:What I like or dislike is irrelevant. What is considered racist and how that affects people is absolutely relevant.

We need to stop treating racism as the biggest problem in the world. It's mostly non-existent in the white world, although it's quite common for other groups.

Wow. What rock have you just crawled out from under? This is not even close to true.

Oh? Look at the data below that shows whites are the only non-racist group. There is so little evidence of racism. There's evidence of differences, but racism fails to explain those.

This is unsurprising.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:So in summary, the only people on this thread that think that race based jokes are ok are white parents who seem to think we live in a post racial society. Okay then.

Do you think it’s relevant that these parents live in a racially diverse area? I’m guessing most of the pearl clutching people on this thread don’t.

This. As the Dad that lives in MV, I bet that most of the people criticizing my kid and his friends probably wouldn't stop at a red light at night on Montgomery Village Ave, but are telling me that I don't understand how teenagers talk about race.

I have a 15 year old and we live in a very diverse county and he has a diverse group of friends. They don't make race based jokes with each other as most of the kid's have racist 'jokes' made to them at school so don't want to hear it from their friends.

NP. Our school district is 60% Black, 30% Hispanic, 10% Other. The kids all joke around about race CONSTANTLY. DD just told me about this interaction:

Black Kid to Hispanic Kid: You better stop. I'm calling Border Patrol.
Hispanic Kid to Black Kid: Oh yeah? I'm calling the Police.

Everyone laughing. DD is mixed race and think it's hilarious. So do I.
It's not a big deal. It's a constant thing.
Clutch your pearls all you want. We *actually* have deep friendships with many different minorities. They are our neighbors. Our tribe. The few white families around here? We love them too.
We don't care about your moralizing.

I don't understand. Conservatives told me that people don't see or care about race anymore, except for DEI Professionals.

No - “I don’t see color” was preDEI. I miss those days of not seeing color. Made much more sense.

To you, you lazy ass. When you aren't seeing color, you really aren't seeing that person. Their race and ethnicity to varying degrees make up that person. That may be tough for you to understand,
It make sense to me that you would like that. This whole thread reeks of it.

People are people. I honestly don’t care about your race or your sexuality or your religion. Be nice to me and I’ll be nice to you. If you somehow want to turn that into an issue of moral superiority, because you are so aware of someone’s race you’re better than me, feel free. But you’re only morally superior in your own head.

+1. Sure, we don’t live in a “colorblind” world, but that should at least be the goal.

[Anonymous]

It's not acceptable, but I find a lot of humor that teens use to be not to my taste/boundary pushing. My son's best friend is from Ethiopia, we are German American. They are constantly making stupid jokes about famine and my son being descended from Nazis. Clearly they think it is funny, but I do not, and correct them about it.