DS given melatonin gummies as prank by “friends at sleepover

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If a parent told me their son did this, I’d laugh. Melatonin makes you mildly tired. It’s not ambien, sheesh. People in this thread are insane

You are disgusting then. And must not have a daughter in HS or going to college.

Also, please read up on being passed out, and aspirating vomit.

+1 what kind of monster laughs at hearing their kid purposely drugged someone, no matter how mild the drug is?

Exactly!!! and it's Melatonin at 15 because that's all they had access to but it could have been Ambien or whatever if they get their hands on it.

I don’t even understand how they thought that was so funny or entertaining. Next will be girls where they can do things to her while she’s passed out. Especially with no consequences the first time they tried it. It’s More common than it should be.

It is possible they did something to ops kid while he was passed out. Girls aren't the only targets. One (or more) could've put something in his mouth, "tea bagged" him, exposed his genitals, etc and photoed or filmed it. These are all things I've heard happened to guys who were passed out at parties. The boys egg each other on and think it's a big joke. I doubt they stopped at drugging and drawing on this poor kid.

This.

New team and new school, OP. And know this may not be over yet and there is likely video or photos on social media. Clean slate for the fall is the safest choice and the best lesson. None of us want to see what they do if given opportunities to up the ante in the locker room after PE, in a deserted hall or stairwell, at another party, etc. Turn the page and move away from known predators. Putting your DS in their orbit as further prey in school is not wise. And definitely no more soccer with them. I'd try to switch to a team that won't play them, either. Clean break. [/quot

Yes

And maybe police

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How does he know they didn’t take pics of him? Or assault him in some way?
I would totally tell the parents.

He doesn’t know if there are any photos but I wouldn’t be surprised if there were.

They asked him in urgent care questions I assumed were related to a possible assault.

He had no strange marks, cuts or bruises on his body. Just some washable market on his face. He was fully clothed when he woke up.

My heart is just breaking…

Ugh. I’m so sorry. My heart is breaking with you.

[Anonymous]

This was a criminal act. They knowing laced his food with some chemical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oof. While I empathize with your DS I feel like you have to tell the parents what happened. What those boys did was dangerous.

I think this is the right call but I know DS will be very angry with me. Half of these boys go to his school.

DS has a couple of close friends with similar interests. Robotics, programming, computers etc but he so desperately wants to be apart of the “cool kids.” I can deeply relate, as I wasted the first three years of HS pursuing friendships with people who did not value me as a person or friend. I try to help DS understand that but he’s hyper focused on befriending these boys. Some are sweet but I’ve seen many of them treat DS poorly. I don’t want to be the parent who over coddled her teenage boy so it’s hard to know when to intervene.

I have no advice other than I’m sorry you and your son are going through this. Kids can be so thoughtless and cruel. As a mom, I know it’s a hard place for you to be trying to balance care and concern and not make it harder for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

This doesn't seem real.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?

I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

This doesn't seem real.

+1 reads like fiction

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?

I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.

But they had practice yesterday

[Anonymous]

I work in a sports related field and the stories of what teammates do to each other would apparently surprise some of you. Yes, kids, not adults. The hazing and bullying and harassment and physical assaults…good luck to your kids if you think this doesn’t sound real.

And OP being concerned these kids have a high social status SHOULD worry OP. It’s not a sign she’s a troll. The power imbalance is a common factor in hazing and bullying and often contributes to why it continues to happen. Bystanders are afraid to speak up because they’re afraid of being targeted next. Adults don’t want to rock the boat or simply can’t believe (see above) that these great athletes might also be horrible people.

[Anonymous]

OP, is the soccer team affiliated with US Soccer? If they are, your son is protected under the SafeSport Code and these kids are in violation of the Code. Report them here: https://uscenterforsafesport.org/report-a-concern/

They’ll take the report even if it’s unaffiliated and they can offer advice.

[Anonymous]

I can believe this sort of thing happens. I can't believe a parent would post details about an incident on a social media site that has 600,000 unique visitors per month.

[Anonymous]

Weighing in on switching schools- why should this poor kid have to switch schools? If the families of the bullies aren't showing any remorse, I'd be telling everyone to stay clear of them. Make them the social outcasts, not the poor kid.
I would definitely switch teams, though. There's no way to rebuild the trust necessary to be a team after that. And no reason a kid should have to try that process. They're not professional athletes working for someone. The team doesn't deserve OP's son

[Anonymous]

Everything that needs to be said has been said. I just want to echo that while I don't know that you need to press charges, the seriousness of DRUGGING someone is not to be understated. What these kids did is NOT ok and your son is not safe with them.

He needs to leave that team ASAP and your DH is wrong to not back you in this. I say this as a dad. Your son is not safe with these boys. And the fact that they're not remorseful is another tell.

As others said, the fact that it was melatonin does not make it ok. Any number of things could have gone really wrong and then what would they have said?

[Anonymous]

OP - any update?