DS given melatonin gummies as prank by “friends at sleepover

[Anonymous]

Op you’re likely to get a letter from your insurance company asking where the injury occurred. I’d flat out say it was at these parents’ house. I get the letter from my insurance every time we go to urgent care (other than with the flu)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

No, it isn’t. Schedules haven’t been set for next year yet. If it means one or more of the boys who did this doesn’t get his first choice of elective, oh darn!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the vast majority of these responses tell you everything you need to know OP. What happened was egregious and dangerous and there needs to be accountability.

+1. And this kind of consensus on DCUM is VERY rare, and posts about bullying are usually met here with near-50% apologists for the bullies shrieking “OMG HOW DO YOU KNOW HE’S NOT BEING ABUSED AT HOME AND SO HE LASHES OUT?!?!?” and boys-will-be-boys, “frontal cortex doesn’t fully develop until 26” morons.

This is not that. This is a group of teenagers who willfully, purposely drugged your son until he vomited repeatedly. Tell the parents. Tell the coach. Whether or not you file a police report is up to your discretion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you friends with any other parents on the team? I'd probably start there, talk to them to see if maybe their kid said anything about it?

And I think I would tell the coach. My kid's coach would be horrified at this kind of behavior.

I'm sorry this happened to your kid. We've had similar issues with ours trying to keep up with the cool kids who aren't nice, and I've got a daughter.

Not really friends. We are all cordial.

I’m friendliest with these two moms who have a boy that’s always been the nicest to DS. I called them and they were pretty validating and spoke to their son and confirmed that he knew it was happening but wasn’t involved. They seem to be taking it seriously.

The host parents were outright dismissive and implied my son lied.

I’ve been able to get a response from a few others who mostly just respond with, “thanks for letting us know”. Not sure if they’ll address it with their kids.

I do want to know who came up with the idea and the dosage of the melatonin but I’m not sure I ever will.

Disgraceful. Unsurprising, but disgraceful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you friends with any other parents on the team? I'd probably start there, talk to them to see if maybe their kid said anything about it?

And I think I would tell the coach. My kid's coach would be horrified at this kind of behavior.

I'm sorry this happened to your kid. We've had similar issues with ours trying to keep up with the cool kids who aren't nice, and I've got a daughter.

Not really friends. We are all cordial.

I’m friendliest with these two moms who have a boy that’s always been the nicest to DS. I called them and they were pretty validating and spoke to their son and confirmed that he knew it was happening but wasn’t involved. They seem to be taking it seriously.

The host parents were outright dismissive and implied my son lied.

I’ve been able to get a response from a few others who mostly just respond with, “thanks for letting us know”. Not sure if they’ll address it with their kids.

I do want to know who came up with the idea and the dosage of the melatonin but I’m not sure I ever will.

Disgraceful. Unsurprising, but disgraceful.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If a parent told me their son did this, I’d laugh. Melatonin makes you mildly tired. It’s not ambien, sheesh. People in this thread are insane

You are disgusting then. And must not have a daughter in HS or going to college.

Also, please read up on being passed out, and aspirating vomit.

+1 what kind of monster laughs at hearing their kid purposely drugged someone, no matter how mild the drug is?

Exactly!!! and it's Melatonin at 15 because that's all they had access to but it could have been Ambien or whatever if they get their hands on it.

I don’t even understand how they thought that was so funny or entertaining. Next will be girls where they can do things to her while she’s passed out. Especially with no consequences the first time they tried it. It’s More common than it should be.

It is possible they did something to ops kid while he was passed out. Girls aren't the only targets. One (or more) could've put something in his mouth, "tea bagged" him, exposed his genitals, etc and photoed or filmed it. These are all things I've heard happened to guys who were passed out at parties. The boys egg each other on and think it's a big joke. I doubt they stopped at drugging and drawing on this poor kid.

This.

New team and new school, OP. And know this may not be over yet and there is likely video or photos on social media. Clean slate for the fall is the safest choice and the best lesson. None of us want to see what they do if given opportunities to up the ante in the locker room after PE, in a deserted hall or stairwell, at another party, etc. Turn the page and move away from known predators. Putting your DS in their orbit as further prey in school is not wise. And definitely no more soccer with them. I'd try to switch to a team that won't play them, either. Clean break.

This is a reason why I would consider filing a police report. The parents have already blown it off. They might find it funny to start sharing photos on social media. But if the police comes to their house and questions the kids, bet that stuff gets deleted quick.

I agree with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If a parent told me their son did this, I’d laugh. Melatonin makes you mildly tired. It’s not ambien, sheesh. People in this thread are insane

You are disgusting then. And must not have a daughter in HS or going to college.

Also, please read up on being passed out, and aspirating vomit.

+1 what kind of monster laughs at hearing their kid purposely drugged someone, no matter how mild the drug is?

Exactly!!! and it's Melatonin at 15 because that's all they had access to but it could have been Ambien or whatever if they get their hands on it.

You're also behind the times, because actually there's quite a lot of worry right now about Melatonin gummies and how the dosages are not regulated and it's not clear how much is in each. Melatonin taken correctly is not dangerous, but an overdose actually could be. These kids could have thought they were giving him a "safe" amount of too much and ended up giving him way too much!

[Anonymous]

Can you ask one of the parents of the nicer kids to check his phone and see if there is any evidence?

[Anonymous]

They may fear liability and not want to get involved but could be worth a try?

[Anonymous]

Not sure a bystander kid would not fear retaliation and same happening to him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

OP be careful that you are not inadvertently feeding into your sons adulation/interest in friending these kids. No one at our school would classify kids in social order. Yes there are multiple social groups but no one thinks there is a hierarchy.

I also think you’d be wasting your time pursuing this legally. That will be an expensive, time consuming game that won’t win much. You need to put your energy into positive things. Start w/ soccer - this is a great time to find a better team and maybe a better club. Or if your son doesn’t love soccer and isn’t going to play through hs, then put the money and time into an activity where he may click better and not be walked over trying to fit in. What about a robotics club/team in addition to his school robotics?

[Anonymous]

It’s poisoning; call the cops.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

[Anonymous]

Op you need to tell the parents!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op you need to tell the parents!!!

She did.