DC shut out from all but one, now wants a gap year

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the lone dissenter who thinks DS pulled the wool over parents eyes and is not being very mature.
But that said the only sons and daughters of college educated parents that I knew (more than a few) just never did make it to college. This happened then that but long story short no college.

You are not alone in your belief.

[Anonymous]

[google]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have him take a few classes at the community or local college.

Do NOT do this as it might affect eligibility for merit scholarship money.

If he did not get into these schools he needs to lower his standards and apply to realistic schools. Working for a year isn’t going to get him in a better school with merit aid.

The point is that he needs to apply as an incoming/new freshman, not a transfer.

Yes, this is a concern. However, to be considered a transfer, a certain number of college credit hours must be completed. A couple of courses will not change the son's status.

Yes it will. At many schools, any college classes taken after HS graduation make you a transfer student.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. This made me chuckle. Most DC teenagers don’t drive, don’t know how to use a circular saw or hammer a nail straight, don’t know how to drive a tractor, don’t know how to shoot a rifle, can’t ride a horse, cant wire a light switch, can’t clean a fish, have no idea how to repair any part of a car, truck, or tractor, and the list goes on. Those are all things I could do by 13 after growing up in the country (not even on a farm). The notion that “corn fed farm girls” (whatever the f that’s supposed to mean) would find most DC “city kids” anything other than sort of sad and clueless is pretty funny.

Good. No reason for my kid to do any of those things.

Well… proudly raising delicate snowflakes without any skills is certainly one way to parent. Hope that works out for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the lone dissenter who thinks DS pulled the wool over parents eyes and is not being very mature.
But that said the only sons and daughters of college educated parents that I knew (more than a few) just never did make it to college. This happened then that but long story short no college.

You are not alone in your belief.

It doesn’t matter. At the end of the day, it is his choice. OP can and *should* make a last ditch effort of getting him to stay overnight on campus with a student host. But if he still says no, OP must accept it. Otherwise he will go kicking and screaming to college, lack the motivation to do well, and waste the tuition money and ruin his GPA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the lone dissenter who thinks DS pulled the wool over parents eyes and is not being very mature.
But that said the only sons and daughters of college educated parents that I knew (more than a few) just never did make it to college. This happened then that but long story short no college.

You are not alone in your belief.

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. This made me chuckle. Most DC teenagers don’t drive, don’t know how to use a circular saw or hammer a nail straight, don’t know how to drive a tractor, don’t know how to shoot a rifle, can’t ride a horse, cant wire a light switch, can’t clean a fish, have no idea how to repair any part of a car, truck, or tractor, and the list goes on. Those are all things I could do by 13 after growing up in the country (not even on a farm). The notion that “corn fed farm girls” (whatever the f that’s supposed to mean) would find most DC “city kids” anything other than sort of sad and clueless is pretty funny.

Good. No reason for my kid to do any of those things.

Most DC teenagers don’t drive - check
don’t know how to use a circular saw - we have a Makita chop saw that's seen better days, handheld circular saw, 2 drill guns, sander, dremel, sold the planer and reciprocating saw as those weren't getting much use
hammer a nail straight - well, yes, I usually need to drill a small pilot hole first
don’t know how to drive a tractor - FIL has a John Deere lawn mower, does that count?
don’t know how to shoot a rifle - shot one once, don't see much need to do it again
can’t ride a horse - did it a few times but don't have the acreage to keep one
cant wire a light switch - I wired my entire apartment, even upgraded the main box myself, got a licensed electrician to sign-off on my work
can’t clean a fish - scales fly everywhere!
have no idea how to repair any part of a car, truck, or tractor, and the list goes on - does repairing appliances count?

-signed, Upper West Side New Yorker, mom to 2 teens

[Anonymous]

Can he defer the acceptance so he has that as a lock for next year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. This made me chuckle. Most DC teenagers don’t drive, don’t know how to use a circular saw or hammer a nail straight, don’t know how to drive a tractor, don’t know how to shoot a rifle, can’t ride a horse, cant wire a light switch, can’t clean a fish, have no idea how to repair any part of a car, truck, or tractor, and the list goes on. Those are all things I could do by 13 after growing up in the country (not even on a farm). The notion that “corn fed farm girls” (whatever the f that’s supposed to mean) would find most DC “city kids” anything other than sort of sad and clueless is pretty funny.

Good. No reason for my kid to do any of those things.

Most DC teenagers don’t drive - check
don’t know how to use a circular saw - we have a Makita chop saw that's seen better days, handheld circular saw, 2 drill guns, sander, dremel, sold the planer and reciprocating saw as those weren't getting much use
hammer a nail straight - well, yes, I usually need to drill a small pilot hole first
don’t know how to drive a tractor - FIL has a John Deere lawn mower, does that count?
don’t know how to shoot a rifle - shot one once, don't see much need to do it again
can’t ride a horse - did it a few times but don't have the acreage to keep one
cant wire a light switch - I wired my entire apartment, even upgraded the main box myself, got a licensed electrician to sign-off on my work
can’t clean a fish - scales fly everywhere!
have no idea how to repair any part of a car, truck, or tractor, and the list goes on - does repairing appliances count?

-signed, Upper West Side New Yorker, mom to 2 teens

Awesome that you wired your apartment. So many people are afraid to learn so do electric work.

But - you drill a pilot hole to drive a nail? We need to talk.

And if you cut the skin off the fish, there’s no need to scale it. Much cleaner and faster.

And no, farm tractor is a whole different animal than a mower.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t read through all of these responses but I think many colleges think favorably of a gap year. I had a friend with a similar situation last year who took a gap year (traveled abroad doing different gap year programs) and has had an excellent year and is headed to a state flagship next year. She’s had an amazing year.

There are study abroad programs that partner up with schools for guaranteed admission: https://vertoeducation.org/

I would also contact a college counselor who could give you advice although I understand time is running out: https://yourcollegeboundkid.com/our-team/

However, if your student is applying to very high level schools it might be tougher to get into those schools after a gap year. I do think most kids end up happy wherever they go but making him go could backfire.

[Anonymous]

Take the gap year on the farm. It will make a heckuva college application essay. Plus: if he establishes residence elsewhere, that could give him an edge.

[Anonymous]

It really won’t be much of an essay because he’ll have to write it prior to deadlines this fall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can he defer the acceptance so he has that as a lock for next year?

This was my question— if he can it’s a no-brainer to do it. (Probably worth a letter to admissions explaining the background of wanting to help grandparents for a year)

If he can’t I’d probably still be on board— it’s their life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the lone dissenter who thinks DS pulled the wool over parents eyes and is not being very mature.
But that said the only sons and daughters of college educated parents that I knew (more than a few) just never did make it to college. This happened then that but long story short no college.

My SIL is an example, it was tied up with being an only child, but I hadn't really thought of this being a common phenomenon. (Really a half sister, much younger never under the same roof as older siblings.) Curious how this will pan out for her kids since she's remained anti-intellectual. Yet they have doting grandparents who are highly educated professionals, and grandparents have helped keep the family in UMC college educated neighborhoods.

[Anonymous]

Yesterday, by accident, I came across a disturbing study that found that farmers is one of three professions for which suicide is most common. (I did not get the website because I was looking for something else.)

Farmers, lumberjacks, and fishermen are the professions with the highest suicide rates. The study noted that these professionals tend to work in isolation and face unsteady employment.

OP: May be a good topic for a college application essay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[google]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have him take a few classes at the community or local college.

Do NOT do this as it might affect eligibility for merit scholarship money.

If he did not get into these schools he needs to lower his standards and apply to realistic schools. Working for a year isn’t going to get him in a better school with merit aid.

The point is that he needs to apply as an incoming/new freshman, not a transfer.

Yes, this is a concern. However, to be considered a transfer, a certain number of college credit hours must be completed. A couple of courses will not change the son's status.

Yes it will. At many schools, any college classes taken after HS graduation make you a transfer student.

All the more reason for OP’s child to pick up the phone, call the college & ask for their policy on that. Or he can email admissions and the registrar. No biggie.