How nice or sincere are parents in elite private schools?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:they're rich and don't like you

That’s ok. It’s reciprocal.

If you hate private school parents so much then why are you on a forum for private schools?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading the comments in DCUM I feel that there is some schizophrenic behavior going on. Meaning that parents theoretically want inclusion, when in fact they want a cozy school with rich parents to keep it well funded. That might explain the nasty posts that appear on a daily basis here demeaning the parents from public schools, foreigners, or middle class families.

This is correct. If these people say they want inclusion, it’s a specific kind of inclusion that makes them feel comfortable- a certain kind of “good” black or brown kid. They do not want their children going to school with the “out of boundary” kids who are not white and come from “bad” neighborhoods. This becomes especially apparent as you get closer to high school and see threads like “panic about MacArthur!!” And “I’m going to move if my kid doesn’t get into _____.” I would just like people to be honest with themselves about it.

Are people nice and outwardly seemingly accepting? Sure. Is that the actual reality when you peel back the layers? No.

A certain kind or maybe just the ones that share similar values. That's more important than what people look like on the outside. Some of you are exceedingly shallow and only look at skin color.

[Anonymous]

I think that all parents are proud of their kids, this is likely more pronounced at private schools with the humble brags being presented in ways like asking questions for upcoming class registration. IT is indeed a silent race. A race for what schools accepted your child, a race for what HS accepted your child, and a race for where your child ultimately gets accepted to college. It is what it is because all the parents want the best for their kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On the surface, they seem very nice and concerned about social justice and inclusion, but reading the posts here, some also come across as more cutthroat, caring mainly about their kids’ experience and their chances of getting into an Ivy League school. Which is the reality and which is the fiction?

Public school parents don’t care?

[Anonymous]

This is not a private school thing, this is a wealthy area thing. We’ve seen similar behaviors from parents at mcps as well at our older DC’s private school and the schools they play against in sports.

Speaking of sports—rubbing elbows with parents from other schools is a good way to get a glimpse at the type of families who attend those schools. Of course those parents are a small slice of the overall community, but still.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that all parents are proud of their kids, this is likely more pronounced at private schools with the humble brags being presented in ways like asking questions for upcoming class registration. IT is indeed a silent race. A race for what schools accepted your child, a race for what HS accepted your child, and a race for where your child ultimately gets accepted to college. It is what it is because all the parents want the best for their kids.

It’s anxiety too. Let’s be honest.

[Anonymous]

Having had kids in public and private I’d say private school parents are more intense. Nice to a**hole scale is similar (both types of schools have both), but I do think there is an undercurrent of desired achievement for the investment (financial and otherwise) parents in privates have made for their kids. Lots of expectations implicit and/or explicit and therefore more pressure and stress on kids, especially high school. Lots of high achievers expecting high achievement. Some of this vibe in public, but way way more in private, in my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that all parents are proud of their kids, this is likely more pronounced at private schools with the humble brags being presented in ways like asking questions for upcoming class registration. IT is indeed a silent race. A race for what schools accepted your child, a race for what HS accepted your child, and a race for where your child ultimately gets accepted to college. It is what it is because all the parents want the best for their kids.

The competitive vibe is real. We’re at a progressive K-8 with a whole child approach and I am still shocked by parents asking questions clearly aimed at tabs keeping. Believe me, you can tell the difference vs. casual convos. They are clearly gunning for a certain high school etc. or at a minimum want to size up their kid against yours. Not all parents are like this but enough

[Anonymous]

There are all types of people in private schools parent community. Some of them are obviously looking for making rich friends, some others are sonmuch into showing off their wealth. But also there are some parents down to earth, treating people equally. You cannot tell how rich those parents are. They talk normal, wear normal clothes, and do not try to show anything to anyone.

[Anonymous]

You're not going to get objective answers here because this is the private school forum and most posters are private school types.

I will say this, though. To me, the weirdest part about private schools is that parents matter. In public schools, we don't give a shit about the parents. It's a school, not a country club.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're not going to get objective answers here because this is the private school forum and most posters are private school types.

I will say this, though. To me, the weirdest part about private schools is that parents matter. In public schools, we don't give a shit about the parents. It's a school, not a country club.

💯 this.

[Anonymous]

Having had kids in both, the elite privates have a higher % of ultra competitive and judge-mental parents.

[Anonymous]

They are not. The one person I know at Bullis is a stone cold B. Elite level mean girl and has the extensive grotesque budget to back it up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On the scale of niceness and sincereness (0-10), parents at elite private schools are a 6.7.

(OP asks a stupid question and we can give her a stupid answer.)

6.9 IMO

Exactly 4.20 - such a BS question

[Anonymous]

I don’t think it matters OP, there are so many varieties of personalities in public or private. The most entertaining types are the snobs who are not built in a way to be looking down on others. If they never leave home without their harness, they just might get there…but it is still not quite enough. Keep climbing honey!