past sexual history and financial status

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A man should know if his future wife slept with the entire fraternity in college before he marries her, most men don’t want their daughters raised to be whores.

And vice versa, right? A woman doesn’t want her sons being taught how to be a man by a womanizer.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like there’s a man on here who was in a UVA fraternity and on the football team, and participated in several activities that would likely be considered sexual assault and non-consensual. I’m assuming lots of alcohol was involved (hello, fraternities), and by his description of “passing around”, these boys were probably passing around a woman who was blacked out.

Since he’s so keen on disclosure, he should lead from the front and disclose exactly who he was and who these other boys are, so they can all be held accountable and justice can be served.

Until he does, he should probably STFU about demanding sexual disclosure. Nobody likes or respects a man who leads from the back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Finances yes, sexual history, no.

Look, no matter what, somebody’s feelings will get hurt if you disclose sexual history. Somebody had a threesome, or slept with a gorgeous celebrity, or paid a sex worker, or did something that will make the other person insecure.

It is fully possible to have a wild sexual experience and then go on to have a very happy, monogamous relationship. But there’s zero need to introduce any doubt by bringing up sex that may make the other person uneasy.

So it is ok not to disclose to your potential husband that you slept with the entire UVA football team because you don’t want to make him feel insecure?

Seriously?

I don’t know anybody who slept with an entire football team. Did you? How was it?

I knew about twenty women you got passed around by the UVA football team. I also participated in those activities because I was one of those players. Ten years after graduating from UVA, I ran into one of those women in my Vienna neighborhood. Her husband knew nothing about her past, and still doesn’t know. She knows who I am, and avoids me as much as she can.

Sounds like both of you had a wild, careless youth. She probably avoids you because you treated her like trash and she's embarrassed that she let you.

Did you tell your wife how you and your buddies passed girls around in college? Or slept with whoever wasn't occupied at the end of a drunken party? Were you a "good guy" or a "sleaze"?

A lot of male athletes treat women like garbage. So do a lot of frat guys. Just read the news.

Look at what happened with the married, middle-aged MSU football coach who got fired for sexually harassing the rape crisis survivor who was hired to give his team speeches about sexual assault.

https://www.lansingstatejournal.com/story/news/local/campus/2025/05/01/mel-tucker-brenda-tracy-lawsuit-michigan-state-university/83387702007/

There's a reason smart women don't seek out athletes to date. Lots of potential for abuse and distasteful treatment. You apparently haven't stopped - bringing up this person from your past as though avoiding you is a poor decision. Seems like a good decision, actually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like there’s a man on here who was in a UVA fraternity and on the football team, and participated in several activities that would likely be considered sexual assault and non-consensual. I’m assuming lots of alcohol was involved (hello, fraternities), and by his description of “passing around”, these boys were probably passing around a woman who was blacked out.

Since he’s so keen on disclosure, he should lead from the front and disclose exactly who he was and who these other boys are, so they can all be held accountable and justice can be served.

Until he does, he should probably STFU about demanding sexual disclosure. Nobody likes or respects a man who leads from the back.

This 🔥

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Finances yes, sexual history, no.

Look, no matter what, somebody’s feelings will get hurt if you disclose sexual history. Somebody had a threesome, or slept with a gorgeous celebrity, or paid a sex worker, or did something that will make the other person insecure.

It is fully possible to have a wild sexual experience and then go on to have a very happy, monogamous relationship. But there’s zero need to introduce any doubt by bringing up sex that may make the other person uneasy.

So it is ok not to disclose to your potential husband that you slept with the entire UVA football team because you don’t want to make him feel insecure?

Seriously?

I don’t know anybody who slept with an entire football team. Did you? How was it?

I knew about twenty women you got passed around by the UVA football team. I also participated in those activities because I was one of those players. Ten years after graduating from UVA, I ran into one of those women in my Vienna neighborhood. Her husband knew nothing about her past, and still doesn’t know. She knows who I am, and avoids me as much as she can.

Sounds like both of you had a wild, careless youth. She probably avoids you because you treated her like trash and she's embarrassed that she let you.

Did you tell your wife how you and your buddies passed girls around in college? Or slept with whoever wasn't occupied at the end of a drunken party? Were you a "good guy" or a "sleaze"?

A lot of male athletes treat women like garbage. So do a lot of frat guys. Just read the news.

Look at what happened with the married, middle-aged MSU football coach who got fired for sexually harassing the rape crisis survivor who was hired to give his team speeches about sexual assault.

https://www.lansingstatejournal.com/story/news/local/campus/2025/05/01/mel-tucker-brenda-tracy-lawsuit-michigan-state-university/83387702007/

There's a reason smart women don't seek out athletes to date. Lots of potential for abuse and distasteful treatment. You apparently haven't stopped - bringing up this person from your past as though avoiding you is a poor decision. Seems like a good decision, actually.

Just a hunch, but I bet he doesn’t have a wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Finances yes, sexual history, no.

Look, no matter what, somebody’s feelings will get hurt if you disclose sexual history. Somebody had a threesome, or slept with a gorgeous celebrity, or paid a sex worker, or did something that will make the other person insecure.

It is fully possible to have a wild sexual experience and then go on to have a very happy, monogamous relationship. But there’s zero need to introduce any doubt by bringing up sex that may make the other person uneasy.

So it is ok not to disclose to your potential husband that you slept with the entire UVA football team because you don’t want to make him feel insecure?

Seriously?

DP. I guess you can always ask, but the question says a lot more about you than the answer would about her.

[Anonymous]

Too many easy women on this site.

[Anonymous]

The best policy is to be completely honest with one another prior to getting married. These are not easy conversations, but must be discussed. Each person must takes that information and decides whether they are right for each other. Otherwise, you will be looking at a high probability of divorce in the future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you believe in full transparency in a relationship? In other words, are both parties honest with one another about past sexual history and financial status before taking the next step of getting engaged and married shortly after that?

This is crucial or they are setting themselves up for failure building a house of cards with. You don't want lies and secrets in a marriage as its too much stress on you and hence on marriage. One lie leads to another and soon you'll feel like a fraud.

[Anonymous]

One reasons why many marriages become bitter or fail.

[Anonymous]

If you can't be honest with each other, move on if your goal isn't a fun wedding but a healthy long term marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you believe in full transparency in a relationship? In other words, are both parties honest with one another about past sexual history and financial status before taking the next step of getting engaged and married shortly after that?

What are you hiding, why do you feel the need to lie and what are your fears about a full discloser?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. If you feel like your partner is going to judge you for your sexual history and financial status, then they probably aren’t the right person for you. You don’t want to live your life walking on eggshells.

And you are not the person they want, you are an impersonator.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A man should know if his future wife slept with the entire fraternity in college before he marries her, most men don’t want their daughters raised to be whores.

Its just not that. Everyone has different values and if you are presenting yourself as that person but you aren't, you are defrauding them.

[Anonymous]

Hiding sexual history is a moral and ethical fraud. Hiding financial history before signing a legal contract is criminal fraud.