Can we talk about parents buying their adult children luxury homes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not enough of you were jumped in HS and it shows.

Maybe the reason you got jumped is because you are a genuinely unlikeable person. Just a thought.

[Anonymous]

Sadly 800 is NOT luxury housing in DC area. My ILs helped us buy a $650K home 20 years ago. We plan to help our kids too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I own a large title company in the area. I am completely dumbfounded by the amount of help people get from parents. I would say the majority of first time buyers get help. For some it’s a few grand. Most commonly the white down payment which can range from 3.5% for fha to 20%. Many get the delta between the loan they can afford (ie $300k) and the home costs where they are buying (ie $500k). Others get $2M-$3M houses. Literally the majority.

It doesn’t surprise me, given the number of unpleasant and entitled people around here.

[Anonymous]

Oh, we all know that one couple - earnest, low earning jobs “because it’s a calling, we don’t care about the money..” three (if not four kids), who live in a house YOU KNOW they didn’t pay for. I think, collectively, it’s okay to hate them.

I don’t have the same animosity for the couple who works hard, have good jobs that pay well, can afford to live in this area...but the parental help just did exactly that, it HELPED. Example, they could afford a house, but the inheritance helped them buy a slightly better house...

The difference is between getting HELPED and being FLOATED.

But your kids a condo and let them work up from their on their own, but buying your kids a house when they are 40 and have three kids, that’s enabling.

[Anonymous]

My ILs recently offered to help us pay to have an addition added to our house. As much as i’d love free money, I can’t accept it. I don’t want to be in their debt. Guess I’m too middle class for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it's not new for parents to help their adult kids out with their first home financially but the number of parents I know buying their adult kids luxury homes is astounding. Has this become a new trend? I recently reunited with a few old friends from high school (we are now all in our early 30s and yes we grew up in expensive homes in a HCOL area) and a number of them have managed to buy 800K plus homes with their parents co-signing the mortgage because they would never be approved for it on their own. These people include a lawyer who put out a shingle and ekes out 65k a year, a friend who went to dental school and has the loans to prove it but upon graduation got married and pregnant and never practiced while her husband is a middle school teacher and an HR assistant at a fortune 500 company making 55k a year. I get helping your kids but why buy them such expensive houses when there salary would never justify it?

I had to wait til my 40s to have a kid because I couldn’t afford it and then I was too old to have more than one. So yeah I hate these people too.

[Anonymous]

It's a very good idea, OP, if you have the means to do it. This is how you build generational wealth.

[Anonymous]

I’m a nanny and my parents bought me a $750k 3br condo. I’m single and childless. I would have never been able to afford to be a homeowner on my salary, and now I can have a home while working a job I love. If I had to buy it on my own, I wouldn’t have been able to work as a nanny and I love the kids in my care.

My parents did the same for my brother, but his home was 1million+. My parents put their beach home in my name to even things out. I never asked for the home and I’m really grateful to have this security.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a nanny and my parents bought me a $750k 3br condo. I’m single and childless. I would have never been able to afford to be a homeowner on my salary, and now I can have a home while working a job I love. If I had to buy it on my own, I wouldn’t have been able to work as a nanny and I love the kids in my care.

My parents did the same for my brother, but his home was 1million+. My parents put their beach home in my name to even things out. I never asked for the home and I’m really grateful to have this security.

Yeah, you are the person the rest of us are allowed to hate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a nanny and my parents bought me a $750k 3br condo. I’m single and childless. I would have never been able to afford to be a homeowner on my salary, and now I can have a home while working a job I love. If I had to buy it on my own, I wouldn’t have been able to work as a nanny and I love the kids in my care.

My parents did the same for my brother, but his home was 1million+. My parents put their beach home in my name to even things out. I never asked for the home and I’m really grateful to have this security.

Yeah, you are the person the rest of us are allowed to hate.

I didn’t get shit from my parents except for an old rusted Chevy truck and one year of college tuition paid for, but I hate you, or anyone who is a generally negative, jealous, whiny person.

To the nanny — good for you — just be a kind person, strive to help others to pay it forward to the universe as much as you can, and ignore the many miserable people that populate this forum. They’re on the internet spreading negativity for one reason and it’s not hard to figure out.

[Anonymous]

This is a way to build inter-generational wealth.

My parents helped us with a down payment, and we hope to do the same for our kids.

I recall reading on the Financial Samurai that something like 50% of buyers in San Francisco rely on the "Bank of Mom and Dad" to buy their first home.

At least in Bethesda where I live, this must be common, as there are tons of people who are not just relying on W-2 wages to pay for their housing. (Example -- the federal employee (lawyer) with a SAHM wife, and they live in a $2 million house.) I'm not sure if that's from hitting it big in prior jobs, or from inheritance, etc.

[Anonymous]

It's not so hard to build wealth. I have worked minimum wage jobs for 20 years, but I trust the stock market. I will have couple of million dollars in 20 years when my kids need money.
At some point the money just grows so much faster than I can spend. You don't have the money ofcourse if your parents didn't trust the stock market and haven't invested for 20-40 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not so hard to build wealth. I have worked minimum wage jobs for 20 years, but I trust the stock market. I will have couple of million dollars in 20 years when my kids need money.
At some point the money just grows so much faster than I can spend. You don't have the money ofcourse if your parents didn't trust the stock market and haven't invested for 20-40 years.

You have lots of extra money from your minimum wage job to invest in the stock market? Because that doesn’t sound like a likely story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a way to build inter-generational wealth.

My parents helped us with a down payment, and we hope to do the same for our kids.

I recall reading on the Financial Samurai that something like 50% of buyers in San Francisco rely on the "Bank of Mom and Dad" to buy their first home.

At least in Bethesda where I live, this must be common, as there are tons of people who are not just relying on W-2 wages to pay for their housing. (Example -- the federal employee (lawyer) with a SAHM wife, and they live in a $2 million house.) I'm not sure if that's from hitting it big in prior jobs, or from inheritance, etc.

I don't think giving money for a house is the best way to pass on "intergenerational wealth" without having the long term funds to back it up. Do you know how many crumbling mansions/chateaus/castles there are in Europe or dilapidated Victorian mansions there are in the US because the family couldn't keep up with the maintenance/taxes or have the income to keep the property in the family because the family just ran out of money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a nanny and my parents bought me a $750k 3br condo. I’m single and childless. I would have never been able to afford to be a homeowner on my salary, and now I can have a home while working a job I love. If I had to buy it on my own, I wouldn’t have been able to work as a nanny and I love the kids in my care.

My parents did the same for my brother, but his home was 1million+. My parents put their beach home in my name to even things out. I never asked for the home and I’m really grateful to have this security.

Yeah, you are the person the rest of us are allowed to hate.

To clarify, what exactly is the reason here for permitted hate? That she received good fortune and generosity from her loved ones?

Is this “hateful” behavior, or is this projected jealousy?