Working parents - feel like I spend no time with my kids

[Anonymous]

Can you go to lunch with your kids? Nanny can bring the baby once/week and pick the other up from school for lunch with mommy occasionally. Continue to remember that your income is enriching their lives! Make sure that he time that you are with them is quality time. Honestly, I would be looking for a more flexible job, but what you are providing your children is important and valuable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I maintain that everyone can take a few years off if they want to. Will you be able to come in at your exact position and pay now? Maybe but probably not. But are the years you spent with your young children worth the "demotion"? A lot of people will say yes.

You have the rest of your life to work. Your children will only be young once and for a very short period of time, relatively.

You are so naïve / privileged / ignorant. Do you really think that working is a choice for most women? You’re such an embarrassment.

Maybe your husband should take a few years off. But then he might not be able to pay your bills.

[Anonymous]

SAHM did not invent the modern motherhood, not did women invent it. Men did.

[Anonymous]

I had a housekeeper in Africa. She told me she has a 4 month old baby at home. I said that I couldn't possibly separate her from her baby( the horror) and how will her baby breastfeed! She told me, baby fine, eating rice and other milk, I need money.

[Anonymous]

I can't get over the white privilege exuding from this thread. Some of the women commenting on here are disgusting.

You realize that women have always worked, right? I take it you didn't grow up on a farm.

[Anonymous]

Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

Because it’s not. Really.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

Because it’s not. Really.

Well I'm sure you're the expert! Thanks for letting me know!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

You sound insufferable. As a PT mom with grandparent help (i.e., no paid childcare) I say: better for the kid to be in daycare than raised by a dumb, narrow-minded, SAHM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

You sound insufferable. As a PT mom with grandparent help (i.e., no paid childcare) I say: better for the kid to be in daycare than raised by a dumb, narrow-minded, SAHM.

I agree with that! Or someone who doesn't actually want to be with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

Yup, just you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think like a man.

Does your spouse feel and think the same way about himself and his time?

You could do that or you could, I dunno, think about what’s best for the kids. Someone should probably try to do that and like love them in person.

Absolutely! Just wanted to let you (and OP) know that there are other women out here who totally agree with you. I find it really sad that so many women are able to convince themselves that their children don't really need the loving care of a parent during their very early years. That any low paid childcare worker (or high paid nanny) can do just as good a job as they could have. I do believe that if parents actually believe that crap then their kids are better off not spending their days with a parent who feels that way.

My opinion is no childcare worker, I don't care what kind of degree or experience they have, can raise my young child better than me or the baby's father. And if I didn't feel that way I wouldn't have had kids. But that's just me!

I'm sure that that one commenter mom will pop up with her link to some data or study that claims that children are actually better off in daycare than home with their parent. Whatever it takes to allow you to go to work everyday!

(And just to be clear, I have nothing but sympathy for parents who literally cannot figure out a way to not work when their kids are infants and toddlers. But, there are now a lot more of them because they are being told that they shouldn't even try to figure out a way because it's not important.)

I'm really curious about you, PP. What is your background (education level, have you ever had a job, if so, what kind, what do you plan to do when your children are school-aged, etc.). Would you be willing to share the information? Genuinely curious here. Thank you!