TO THE MOM WHO RED SHIRTED HER SON AND COMPLAINS HE'S NOT CHALLENGED

[Anonymous]

The two out of 9 kids held back in our private are April/May birthdays, not fall birthdays, so you are not talking a few month difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the folks with preemies and kid with special needs, the conversation is not about your kids. Obviously if there are profound reasons why a kid should start outside of their prescribed age range, then that is appropriate. The conversation is not about your kids - it is about the totally normal, age appropriate function kids whose parents are deciding for whatever reason, they want to start their kids late, and then brag about how smart/athletic their kids are to the world.

The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To the folks with preemies and kid with special needs, the conversation is not about your kids. Obviously if there are profound reasons why a kid should start outside of their prescribed age range, then that is appropriate. The conversation is not about your kids - it is about the totally normal, age appropriate function kids whose parents are deciding for whatever reason, they want to start their kids late, and then brag about how smart/athletic their kids are to the world.

The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

Having an August/September birthday is not a special need or an issue with no diagnosis, but it is a reason a lot of parents hold back their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

And redshirting is not going to do a thing for these issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The two out of 9 kids held back in our private are April/May birthdays, not fall birthdays, so you are not talking a few month difference.

I think privates are a different story. From what I've heard, private school administrations are deliberately shaping their classes so the boys are already 6 when they start K. This is not an issue with parents "gaming the system" but rather a feature that the school is affirmatively trying to create. So you should take that up with the school, not with the supposedly opportunistic parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

And redshirting is not going to do a thing for these issues.

Your ignorance is showing. Many research studies have shown that the risk of being diagnosed with ADHD is connected to be the youngest in the class. Anxiety can absolutely affect socialization and behavior, especially when mixed with social deficits that may be too subtle to be diagnosable as an ASD. Just be glad that you have a perfect child, PP, and let the rest of us care for our own. The one or two older kids in your child's class pose no threat, except in your own mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

And redshirting is not going to do a thing for these issues.

Your ignorance is showing. Many research studies have shown that the risk of being diagnosed with ADHD is connected to be the youngest in the class. Anxiety can absolutely affect socialization and behavior, especially when mixed with social deficits that may be too subtle to be diagnosable as an ASD. Just be glad that you have a perfect child, PP, and let the rest of us care for our own. The one or two older kids in your child's class pose no threat, except in your own mind.

The older kids due pose issues due to their behaviors that take away from learning and class time. They are constantly getting in trouble. Their language is horrible. They are hitting the other kids and talking back to the teachers.

Research studies are looking to prove their theory. They gather data from volunteers who have those symptoms to prove their point. There is no medical determination. ADHD and Anxiety are medically related as are ASD. My child has SN, but holding him back isn't going to fix those problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The two out of 9 kids held back in our private are April/May birthdays, not fall birthdays, so you are not talking a few month difference.

I think privates are a different story. From what I've heard, private school administrations are deliberately shaping their classes so the boys are already 6 when they start K. This is not an issue with parents "gaming the system" but rather a feature that the school is affirmatively trying to create. So you should take that up with the school, not with the supposedly opportunistic parents.

Most schools, yes. Our school welcomes younger kids in and does very well with them academically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

And redshirting is not going to do a thing for these issues.

Your ignorance is showing. Many research studies have shown that the risk of being diagnosed with ADHD is connected to be the youngest in the class. Anxiety can absolutely affect socialization and behavior, especially when mixed with social deficits that may be too subtle to be diagnosable as an ASD. Just be glad that you have a perfect child, PP, and let the rest of us care for our own. The one or two older kids in your child's class pose no threat, except in your own mind.

You are so off base PP. being the youngest in a classroom setting does not mean a higher chance for ADHD or anxiety. Give me a break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People don't typically redshirt because of academic concerns. They redshirt because of social concerns. Don't worry, nobody is trying to show up your little Larla.

Those of us with girls are furious over the prospect of 20-year-old high school senior men.

+1 exactly

[phone]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The two out of 9 kids held back in our private are April/May birthdays, not fall birthdays, so you are not talking a few month difference.

Same here. There is a boy at our private who turned 7 in early may. Are you KIDDING?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The two out of 9 kids held back in our private are April/May birthdays, not fall birthdays, so you are not talking a few month difference.

Same here. There is a boy at our private who turned 7 in early may. Are you KIDDING?!

(this is in K, where a good # of kids are still 5 -- as they should be)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

And redshirting is not going to do a thing for these issues.

Your ignorance is showing. Many research studies have shown that the risk of being diagnosed with ADHD is connected to be the youngest in the class. Anxiety can absolutely affect socialization and behavior, especially when mixed with social deficits that may be too subtle to be diagnosable as an ASD. Just be glad that you have a perfect child, PP, and let the rest of us care for our own. The one or two older kids in your child's class pose no threat, except in your own mind.

You are so off base PP. being the youngest in a classroom setting does not mean a higher chance for ADHD or anxiety. Give me a break.

NP. I read the study that showed that a summer bday child was more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD than a fall bday child. The reason, of course, is that the summer bday child will be less mature, less focused, than a fall bday child.

I have two kids with summer bday. Both went on time. DS had a harder time with following directions, but he outgrew it, and now is in a gifted program.

To people who keep posting why they decided to redshirt -- we get it. Most of us are just saying, if you choose to redshirt for whatever reason, just don't be *that* parent who complains that your child is not challenged enough. You made your bed; now please lie in it without whining about it. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

If you redshirt your child you are doing a huge disservice to his self esteem. Maybe not in the younger grades but upper elementary every knows the red shirt kids. If you excel that is the reason. If you are middle of the pack, there is "not smart enough to fit in with peers his age" stigma. If you are bottom of the pack, most people start pointing fingers at parents as to why. If they are problematic, the entire parent population avoids your child like the plague as the big bully. It only gets worse once the kids know.

Have faith in your child and the system. They have already brought back the cut-off date 4 months. Why are you cutting it off even more. Your kids can do it. If they can't the teachers will guide you and let you know. Be proactive. If you start redshirting your attack will always be the defense. And you will be anxious there is an issue even after red shirting and then what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
The line isn't that bright, PP. A lot of parents don't discover a child has special needs like dyslexia until they start school or they might suspect some special needs and hold their child back and realize later that their child does not have the issues they thought they might. There are also parents who may suspect their child has issues but never get a diagnosis. What is "totally normal" in this context anyway? You might be surprised that some of the kids who with no physical tell have issues have severe anxiety, depression, ADHD-inattentive type or other issues.

And redshirting is not going to do a thing for these issues.

Your ignorance is showing. Many research studies have shown that the risk of being diagnosed with ADHD is connected to be the youngest in the class. Anxiety can absolutely affect socialization and behavior, especially when mixed with social deficits that may be too subtle to be diagnosable as an ASD. Just be glad that you have a perfect child, PP, and let the rest of us care for our own. The one or two older kids in your child's class pose no threat, except in your own mind.

The older kids due pose issues due to their behaviors that take away from learning and class time. They are constantly getting in trouble. Their language is horrible. They are hitting the other kids and talking back to the teachers.

Research studies are looking to prove their theory. They gather data from volunteers who have those symptoms to prove their point. There is no medical determination. ADHD and Anxiety are medically related as are ASD. My child has SN, but holding him back isn't going to fix those problems.

Ok lady, I give up. Clearly children with any issues should be removed to a small, dark room to keep them from contaminating your snowflake.