Why are women in their 30s considered old and men are not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because women peak in 20s/early 30s. Men don't.

This. Sad but true. That said, if a good guy is single in his mid thirties, I think of the sex and the city episode where Carrie is first dating Aiden and goes “seriously, what’s wrong with you? Why are you single?” Many guys are off the market by then, whether married, engaged or in long term relationships leading to the latter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because women peak in 20s/early 30s. Men don't.

Because women are primarily judged by their physical attractiveness and men are judged by their money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's because of fertility but I think that perception is changing rapidly due to the recent studies on health risks to babies when fathers are older. The view before was that men can have kids when they're in their 40s but now people are scared of autism, etc. so male and female fertility is evening out.

Nice try. A guy in his 40s is not sweating about autism and other special needs. Yes, it's a slightly higher risk with an older dad. In absolute terms, the risk is still small.

A woman in her 40s is highly unlikely to ever have her own biological baby.

Different stakes entirely and it's not an even playing field.

I'm early 30s and have been concerned about dating men 40+ for this reason as have a couple of gfs in their late 20s. I don't think the information is widespread, however.

Congratulations, you're dumb. Please wise up for your own sake. Men 40+ are finally not boys anymore. You are in the right age bracket to snag a good one. Chop-chop, before your eggs expire. Worrying about special needs, because the man is 40+ is beyond stupid. Educate yourself about it to ease your mind.

Or enjoy singlehood. Many cats need loving homes.

Says the loser forty something man who wants to date women too young for him.

You wish How are your cats doing?

Dp. I am so tired of the cat and single woman stick. Please can we retire this?

My husband is the cat lady in our family. He was born that way. If I had not been open to having cat he might not have gotten serious with me. I’m not joking

Me too! I'm an equal opportunity cat and dog lover, but I had a cat when I met him and honestly I think that was probably one of the main criteria.

Also, lord, as a 35 year old mother with a rich-ass husband I met in grad school (I still make more than most of the men posting here, though, I'd guess), cats, wine nights out with friends and no old washed-up loser who couldn't lock someone down earlier to deal with sounds like a great life. I'm team single older women here - I just hope they don't let these types of threads bum them out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's because of fertility but I think that perception is changing rapidly due to the recent studies on health risks to babies when fathers are older. The view before was that men can have kids when they're in their 40s but now people are scared of autism, etc. so male and female fertility is evening out.

That doesn't change the perception at all. Women in their 30s will still have trouble conceiving regardless of the age of the man.

Not true. At all. Women have been having babies until their late 30s for 100 years. My grandmother was conceived when her mother was 42. I had two pregnancies they were unplanned in my mid and late 30s. My friend had an accidental pregnancy with twins at 45. Women can easily conceive in their 30s as much is in their 20s if they don’t have fertility issues the people who have fertility issues in their 30s very likely would’ve had them in their 20s. You were either fertile or you’re not and you don’t know which one you are until you start trying to have kids or get accidentally pregnant as many people do.

There are literally starting to be articles that there is no fertility Cliff at 35 it’s been shut down women’s throats for years. Both my grandmothers had children in their late 30s.

The answer is sexism not fertility. I would not wanna have a baby with a man over 40 if I could help it because the chances of special needs children go dramatically up when the father is 40 or higher because of sperm quality.

The whole conversation is unnecessarily geared against women when honestly both genders have declining fertility with age however no one talks about both genders—they just talk about the woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because women peak in 20s/early 30s. Men don't.

Because women are primarily judged by their physical attractiveness and men are judged by their money.

This.

[Anonymous]

I’m not sure if it’s a fertility thing. I know many women in their 30s who got pregnant on the “first try” with no assistance. Myself included.

Everyone is different.

Some women look old in their mid to late 20s while others look young into their 50s. It just depends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's because of fertility but I think that perception is changing rapidly due to the recent studies on health risks to babies when fathers are older. The view before was that men can have kids when they're in their 40s but now people are scared of autism, etc. so male and female fertility is evening out.

That doesn't change the perception at all. Women in their 30s will still have trouble conceiving regardless of the age of the man.

Not true. At all. Women have been having babies until their late 30s for 100 years. My grandmother was conceived when her mother was 42. I had two pregnancies they were unplanned in my mid and late 30s. My friend had an accidental pregnancy with twins at 45. Women can easily conceive in their 30s as much is in their 20s if they don’t have fertility issues the people who have fertility issues in their 30s very likely would’ve had them in their 20s. You were either fertile or you’re not and you don’t know which one you are until you start trying to have kids or get accidentally pregnant as many people do.

There are literally starting to be articles that there is no fertility Cliff at 35 it’s been shut down women’s throats for years. Both my grandmothers had children in their late 30s.

The answer is sexism not fertility. I would not wanna have a baby with a man over 40 if I could help it because the chances of special needs children go dramatically up when the father is 40 or higher because of sperm quality.

The whole conversation is unnecessarily geared against women when honestly both genders have declining fertility with age however no one talks about both genders—they just talk about the woman.

Look at the statistics. I think many people hear about women having babies later in life and think oh look at that….if she can do it at that age and any woman can do it at that age and I have a boatload of time. The vast majority are using donated eggs and fertility treatments. I know they did not teach this is sex ed when I was in high school.

Fertility specialists quote approximately a 5% chance per menstrual cycle of getting pregnant naturally after age 40 vs. a 25% chance per cycle for women in their 20’s, which is when fertility typically peaks.
The reason for the decline in successful pregnancies after 40 is multifactorial. The rate of miscarriage is about 40% after the age of 40. This is due to many reasons, but the biggest is a higher chance of genetic abnormalities in each egg. Women’s ovarian reserve also decreases over time, meaning they have fewer eggs by age 40.

https://vpfw.com/blog/getting-pregnant-at-40-faqs-and-tips-for-optimizing-your-fertility-health/

A study in the medical journal Fertility and Sterility confirms Johnson's point. Researchers found that 40-year-old women treated for infertility had a 25 percent chance of getting pregnant using their own eggs. But by age 43 that number dropped to 10 percent, and by 44 it had plummeted to 1.6 percent. Among women who did get pregnant, the miscarriage rate was 24 percent for 40-year-olds, 38 percent for 43-year-olds, and 54 percent for 44-year-olds.

https://www.babycenter.com/getting-pregnant/preparing-for-pregnancy/age-and-fertility-getting-pregnant-in-your-40s_1494699

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If a guy is single in his thirties people usually say oh he is waiting for the right girl and taking his time and being responsible. If a woman is 30+ and single she's too old and a spinster.

Remind me, why again?

Is it the fertility thing? But with modern medicine and good nutrition and health most women can conceive for as late as late thirties.

It’s not a fertility thing any more, it’s patriarchal conditioning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Men are attracted to women primarily on physical attractiveness. All else being equal, men find women most attractive in the early 20s-early 30s range (obviously exceptions).

Women are attracted to men based on power, "ambition", money, , confidence, status and of course physical appearances which often go as much to how he wears a suit more than if he has a six pack. It takes men years of career success to achieve these things.

Men should marry earlier but society should weigh them for their character, intelligence and work habits, not for their income and assets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If a guy is single in his thirties people usually say oh he is waiting for the right girl and taking his time and being responsible. If a woman is 30+ and single she's too old and a spinster.

Remind me, why again?

Is it the fertility thing? But with modern medicine and good nutrition and health most women can conceive for as late as late thirties.

Would banning premarital and extramarital sex bring age equality between both genders???

[Anonymous]

I'm about to be sixty and I"m amazed at the ways in which women are also considered old and useless at a much earlier age then men. Went to a conference where a whole bunch of really old male academics (like late 70's) were very well respected for their ideas. There were no women in their late 70's speaking at the conference.
And think about Nancy Pelosi. She's in her 80's but has a fantabulous amount of botox, etc. so that people won't dismiss her as elderly. She looks so much younger than Wilbur Ross, for example -- but yet people still want to know what Kissinger thinks in his 90's. Men are considered wise and women are considered old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If a guy is single in his thirties people usually say oh he is waiting for the right girl and taking his time and being responsible. If a woman is 30+ and single she's too old and a spinster.

Remind me, why again?

Is it the fertility thing? But with modern medicine and good nutrition and health most women can conceive for as late as late thirties.

Would banning premarital and extramarital sex bring age equality between both genders???

Banning extramarital and premarital sex has worked so well up till now.

[Anonymous]

yet people still want to know what Kissinger thinks in his 90's

No we don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because women peak in 20s/early 30s. Men don't.

Because women are primarily judged by their physical attractiveness and men are judged by their money.

This.

Yup. And women are fertile in younger years.

It just is what it is. Youth is beauty, OP.

[Anonymous]

With movies, fashion magazines, photo filters, make up, botox and social media, human fascination with youth and beauty has increased exponentially. It’s unhealthy.

Beauty and youth doesn’t make you a better person, a better partner, a better parent, a better teacher, a better physician, a better solider or a better anything other than not related to aesthetics.