pregnant at 47

[Anonymous]

As a child of older parents, it is not easy. That's just a fact. My parents felt great in their 40s, 50s and even 60s, but now in their late 70s, they are struggling and I have yet to have a baby of my own. I never wanted to be an older parent and I am well on my way there. I just pray that I get as much time as possible with my kids as I can. Gosh, at this point I hope I can even have one baby. It makes me very sad though that I couldn't have them as young as my friends. I would give anything to have an 8 or 9 year old right now.

I agree with the above poster that says that being an older parent does affect your children. Maybe not right away but down the line it definitely does. Had I known that I would have this many problems conceiving, I wold have started even sooner than we did. Am I more knowledgeable now that I am older, well sure. But I would trade more knowledge for being a younger mom any day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do women beat up on each other for choices like this? Men don't sit around berating one another for having children at 32 versus 46 so why do women?
Women sometimes have children late for many reasons, and oftentimes it can not be helped. Leave it be and just try to be supportive for one another rather than shooting older women down for these very personal choices.

It isn't a personal choice though, not if the mother really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect that child. Late 30's is one thing, but late 40's is very inconsiderate to your unborn child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do women beat up on each other for choices like this? Men don't sit around berating one another for having children at 32 versus 46 so why do women?
Women sometimes have children late for many reasons, and oftentimes it can not be helped. Leave it be and just try to be supportive for one another rather than shooting older women down for these very personal choices.

It isn't a personal choice though, not if the mother really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect that child. Late 30's is one thing, but late 40's is very inconsiderate to your unborn child.

Yes, sometimes it is not a choice. In our case, we married late in life and when we got married, my wife had some major health issues that completely precluded her having children at the time. We couldn't even adopt because we spent a large part of the first 8 years of our marriage getting her personal health stabilized and we were in no way capable of caring for children in addition to her during those years. We had children as early as we could, but that still made us late parents. And, it was unavoidable. Completely.

[Anonymous]

Congratulations. My prayers to you. I had my youngest at 43. Good luck! Post back and let us know.

[Anonymous]

My aunt conceived naturally at age 46. She gave birth to healthy twins.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do women beat up on each other for choices like this? Men don't sit around berating one another for having children at 32 versus 46 so why do women?
Women sometimes have children late for many reasons, and oftentimes it can not be helped. Leave it be and just try to be supportive for one another rather than shooting older women down for these very personal choices.

It isn't a personal choice though, not if the mother really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect that child. Late 30's is one thing, but late 40's is very inconsiderate to your unborn child.

Perhaps it carries a greater risk that your child will have to take care of an older parent earlier in life than she or he expected and it may interfere with her or his ability to devote as much time to their own children. We got that. BUT - think of the advantages also. Older parents tend to be wealthier. An older parent can afford better schools and universities, have more in savings, can provide for a greater inheritance to you, bestow greater wisdom and experience on you. And grandchildren get to see what compassion and caring are all about when they can see their parents helping their aging grandparents. It's the best way for them to learn why and how we care for our elders in the community.

As for the argument of dying and leaving young children alone in life, when you die is based mostly on genetics and somewhat on healthy lifestyle choices.

I thought it very telling also that you said, "It isn't a personal choice though, not if the MOTHER really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect her child." Why is your criticism of only older mothers? What about older fathers? This just seems to me to be another excuse for women to bash women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do women beat up on each other for choices like this? Men don't sit around berating one another for having children at 32 versus 46 so why do women?
Women sometimes have children late for many reasons, and oftentimes it can not be helped. Leave it be and just try to be supportive for one another rather than shooting older women down for these very personal choices.

It isn't a personal choice though, not if the mother really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect that child. Late 30's is one thing, but late 40's is very inconsiderate to your unborn child.

Perhaps it carries a greater risk that your child will have to take care of an older parent earlier in life than she or he expected and it may interfere with her or his ability to devote as much time to their own children. We got that. BUT - think of the advantages also. Older parents tend to be wealthier. An older parent can afford better schools and universities, have more in savings, can provide for a greater inheritance to you, bestow greater wisdom and experience on you. And grandchildren get to see what compassion and caring are all about when they can see their parents helping their aging grandparents. It's the best way for them to learn why and how we care for our elders in the community.

As for the argument of dying and leaving young children alone in life, when you die is based mostly on genetics and somewhat on healthy lifestyle choices.

I thought it very telling also that you said, "It isn't a personal choice though, not if the MOTHER really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect her child." Why is your criticism of only older mothers? What about older fathers? This just seems to me to be another excuse for women to bash women.

I would much rather have my mother around for more of my life than a greater inheritance, to me that is worth so much more. Also, you say a benefit to having older parents is they can afford better education. That may be the case, but when I was working a full time job all through college I can tell you that there was a much higher incentive for me to do well than the kids whose mommy's and daddy's were paying for everything. I graduated with honors from a state school and now have a very successful career. I may not have been able to afford private schools, but the work ethic I learned having to support myself through college is so much more valuable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I would much rather have my mother around for more of my life than a greater inheritance, to me that is worth so much more. Also, you say a benefit to having older parents is they can afford better education. That may be the case, but when I was working a full time job all through college I can tell you that there was a much higher incentive for me to do well than the kids whose mommy's and daddy's were paying for everything. I graduated with honors from a state school and now have a very successful career. I may not have been able to afford private schools, but the work ethic I learned having to support myself through college is so much more valuable.

+1

[Anonymous]

Oh you are the best PP..spare me. A good parent can come along at any age and a bad one at any age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I would much rather have my mother around for more of my life than a greater inheritance, to me that is worth so much more. Also, you say a benefit to having older parents is they can afford better education. That may be the case, but when I was working a full time job all through college I can tell you that there was a much higher incentive for me to do well than the kids whose mommy's and daddy's were paying for everything. I graduated with honors from a state school and now have a very successful career. I may not have been able to afford private schools, but the work ethic I learned having to support myself through college is so much more valuable.

And I would much rather be here to share even only 30-40 years of my life with my mother than to have her choose not to have had me because she was too old. And for the record, My mother was 33 when I was born and I am the poster who was 46 when my kids were born. My mother is 80 and my MIL are 81 and are still extremely happy with their twin toddler grandchildren. My father is 86 (he was 39 when I was born) and still moderately active. Both grandmothers are in reasonably good health at this point in time and in no danger of failing health in the near future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh you are the best PP..spare me. A good parent can come along at any age and a bad one at any age.

Exactly!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do women beat up on each other for choices like this? Men don't sit around berating one another for having children at 32 versus 46 so why do women?
Women sometimes have children late for many reasons, and oftentimes it can not be helped. Leave it be and just try to be supportive for one another rather than shooting older women down for these very personal choices.

It isn't a personal choice though, not if the mother really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect that child. Late 30's is one thing, but late 40's is very inconsiderate to your unborn child.

Perhaps it carries a greater risk that your child will have to take care of an older parent earlier in life than she or he expected and it may interfere with her or his ability to devote as much time to their own children. We got that. BUT - think of the advantages also. Older parents tend to be wealthier. An older parent can afford better schools and universities, have more in savings, can provide for a greater inheritance to you, bestow greater wisdom and experience on you. And grandchildren get to see what compassion and caring are all about when they can see their parents helping their aging grandparents. It's the best way for them to learn why and how we care for our elders in the community.

As for the argument of dying and leaving young children alone in life, when you die is based mostly on genetics and somewhat on healthy lifestyle choices.

I thought it very telling also that you said, "It isn't a personal choice though, not if the MOTHER really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect her child." Why is your criticism of only older mothers? What about older fathers? This just seems to me to be another excuse for women to bash women.

I would much rather have my mother around for more of my life than a greater inheritance, to me that is worth so much more. Also, you say a benefit to having older parents is they can afford better education. That may be the case, but when I was working a full time job all through college I can tell you that there was a much higher incentive for me to do well than the kids whose mommy's and daddy's were paying for everything. I graduated with honors from a state school and now have a very successful career. I may not have been able to afford private schools, but the work ethic I learned having to support myself through college is so much more valuable.

And similarly, most children born to older parents would much rather be born rather than not. To them, their life is still worth living despite having older aging parents and additional responsibilities.

And just because you had greater incentive to do well in your academics doesn't mean most students with paid-for college educations do poorly. My parents paid for my sister's education and she, too, graduated from a prestigious school and is now a physician. I worked and used part of my earnings to pay for my tuition but most of it was paid for by my parents also. I have a graduate degree. We both have strong work ethics. It just doesn't prove anything. You are grasping at straws here and maybe have some preconceived and very traditional ideas on marriage and children. That's fine but not fair to continually criticize others who hold a different view.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do women beat up on each other for choices like this? Men don't sit around berating one another for having children at 32 versus 46 so why do women?
Women sometimes have children late for many reasons, and oftentimes it can not be helped. Leave it be and just try to be supportive for one another rather than shooting older women down for these very personal choices.

It isn't a personal choice though, not if the mother really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect that child. Late 30's is one thing, but late 40's is very inconsiderate to your unborn child.

Perhaps it carries a greater risk that your child will have to take care of an older parent earlier in life than she or he expected and it may interfere with her or his ability to devote as much time to their own children. We got that. BUT - think of the advantages also. Older parents tend to be wealthier. An older parent can afford better schools and universities, have more in savings, can provide for a greater inheritance to you, bestow greater wisdom and experience on you. And grandchildren get to see what compassion and caring are all about when they can see their parents helping their aging grandparents. It's the best way for them to learn why and how we care for our elders in the community.

As for the argument of dying and leaving young children alone in life, when you die is based mostly on genetics and somewhat on healthy lifestyle choices.

I thought it very telling also that you said, "It isn't a personal choice though, not if the MOTHER really looks at all the ways having a child later in life will affect her child." Why is your criticism of only older mothers? What about older fathers? This just seems to me to be another excuse for women to bash women.

I would much rather have my mother around for more of my life than a greater inheritance, to me that is worth so much more. Also, you say a benefit to having older parents is they can afford better education. That may be the case, but when I was working a full time job all through college I can tell you that there was a much higher incentive for me to do well than the kids whose mommy's and daddy's were paying for everything. I graduated with honors from a state school and now have a very successful career. I may not have been able to afford private schools, but the work ethic I learned having to support myself through college is so much more valuable.

And similarly, most children born to older parents would much rather be born rather than not. To them, their life is still worth living despite having older aging parents and additional responsibilities.

And just because you had greater incentive to do well in your academics doesn't mean most students with paid-for college educations do poorly.

[Anonymous]

I'm 43 and hoping for a miracle, I have great numbers, FSH -8, AMH 1.7, and antral follicle count 12, so which clinic is my best bet for success??

[Anonymous]

PP- Best of luck to you.... But just a "heads up" if you are not already aware.....Numbers can fluctuate greatly each month- Going back and forth repeatedly. Especially past 40 years old. And *You are ONLY as "good" as your WORST number.* I am 44 and 2 months ago my FSH was 8 but it was 38 the month before that.....So my prognosis is the elevated FSH number of 38 . The ONLY way to know that is by having a history of your numbers over the course of several consecutive day 3 results in a row. That said- it is best to try on a month where FSH is lower.

Now to answer your question....I have obviously not had success but FWIW I have been to CFA (Abbasi) and GW (Frankfurter.) Both are good practices (IMO) but prefer CFA in large part because I did not feel like a number there. There are endless opinions on this forum about "best" clinics. Opinions vary a lot.