I asked out a 19/20 year old girl today who I thought was a grown adult woman

[Anonymous]

OP's ex-wife must have had a banging young body. He saw a teenager's body and it reminded him of his ex's body. It is not his fault that he thought that the teen was his age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eww. Don’t approach women on the street. And if you’re 42, how about looking for women your own age instead of 12 years younger. You didn’t know she was 20, but you for damn sure knew she wasn’t 42. Loser.

Nobody wants to date or marry a 42 year old women. They’re dried up & haggard. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eww. Don’t approach women on the street. And if you’re 42, how about looking for women your own age instead of 12 years younger. You didn’t know she was 20, but you for damn sure knew she wasn’t 42. Loser.

Nobody wants to date or marry a 42 year old women. They’re dried up & haggard. Sorry.

*woman*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:1. Please leave women alone when they’re exercising.

2. You really, really mistook a 19 y/o for a 30 y/o? Or did you think early 20s and trying to make yourself look better?

3. How good shape you thought she was in and her shorts and tank top description make this a super creepy post.

4. You come across creepy in your post, you’re worried about being creepy, OP you know the expression about things that look like ducks…

Honestly, +1 to all of this. I find it hard to believe that you thought she was 30+. I also think that if she had been receptive, instead of shutting you down, you would have gone for it.

You chased down a teenager while she was exercising and hit on her. She handled it well, but you need to not do that.

Not hard at all if someone is wearing sunglasses & a hat. You basically can’t see their hair or face.

So, he could not see her face, but based on her body, he creeped up to her and asked her out when she was out walking? Ugh! What a creep! He is the age to be her father. C'mon. Do better.

He's only 42. Pretty rare to have kids at 23 in "leafy UMC neighborhoods."

Maybe OP lives in Utah, Arizona, Texas or Florida

I lived in 3 out of those states and there were lots of UMC religious families headed by folks in their early 20s, usually Mormon

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eww. Don’t approach women on the street. And if you’re 42, how about looking for women your own age instead of 12 years younger. You didn’t know she was 20, but you for damn sure knew she wasn’t 42. Loser.

If I’m 42 of course I’m dating someone 12 years younger. Why wouldn’t I?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eww. Don’t approach women on the street. And if you’re 42, how about looking for women your own age instead of 12 years younger. You didn’t know she was 20, but you for damn sure knew she wasn’t 42. Loser.

Nobody wants to date or marry a 42 year old women. They’re dried up & haggard. Sorry.

Nice sexist comment. If you don't appreciate a 42 year old that is on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel gross.

I’m a 42 y/o divorced dad and live in a leafy UMC neighborhood. I WFH full time. For the past few weeks/months I’ve seen someone who looked to be a woman in her 30s speed walking and occasionally running in my neighborhood. She is about 5”3 and wears dark sunglasses, baseball cap, shorts, running sneakers & a tank top. Has long brown hair & is in amazing shape from what I could tell based on looking at her.

Anyway, I was out walking today and saw her. I must’ve startled her by walking far behind her on the same sidewalk. She looked behind, and that’s when I finally decided I would make a move. She looked a little startled, but I introduced myself and we both kept walking together. She quickly started chatting with me, and I complimented her on her walking/running. We were talking about how nice it was out & how hilly the neighborhood is. She spoke like a grown adult & seemed very confident. Anyway, as I was about to make a turn on my route after a few blocks, I asked her if she’d like to meet again and if there was any way I could contact her. She kindly but swiftly shut that down; she said “That is nice of you, but I am going back to college for the summer next week. Good luck with your walking” I said thank you and made a turn.

This girl was probably 19 years old & taking walks from her parents house. I feel like a creep.

No laws would have been broken if you consummated a relationship with her. She is an adult and has agency. She can say yes or no...go for it.[/quote]

Ha he did and she shut his 42 year old ass down. Way to go girl!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Please do not approach women when they are out jogging and walking! I'm a mom and have had this happen and it sucks. Trust me when I say that she was literally out walking and jogging to get a work out. No other reason at all. If you want to meet women, go to target rich environments meant for that.

This is a good point, to be honest. It's exhausting to feel like every activity, no matter how much one is doing it for themselves, is interpreted as an invitation to be asked out. Sometimes we just want to go for a run, even if we do it while cute.

Another woman who has to agree with this. Not only for the just-out-for-a-jog aspect but also the complete stranger part. It just gives me weird feelings like that a young woman can't simply exist in this world without being on display as a piece of meat for a man to feel is his for the choosing. Yes, it sounds like OP was perfectly respectable in his interaction, but the whole thing is creepy and not because of the age difference.

Juxtapose this with the threads by single women asking why they cannot find anyone.

You over exaggerate. You are not being asked out on every activity. It's just not happening. If OP doesn't try his hand, how else does he (or anyone else for that matter) meet people? We complain about online dating but then throw stones at those that try to meet in person.

There's nothing wrong with what you did, OP. You figured her age and backed off. Good for you.

Lol. For someone who likely purports to be an advocate for men, you sure have a low opinion of their capabilities.

Most men can easily understand that there is a time and a place to ask women on a date, and it is not while they are exercising after never having spoken to you before.

I’ve met one man who would literally hang out on street corners trying to pick up women as they walked past. It would work 1/100 times. This dude was possibly the creepiest and most mentally unstable man I have met - he threatened to burn my house down eventually.

how does that even remotely relate to OP who was respectful and left her alone after the rejection? And where was I advocating for young men? Lord, you people read so much into these posts that isn't even there.

Men should ask women out. Women should be able to ask men out. It should be respectful. We shouldn't be scared to talk to one another because of harpies like the PP

42 y/o men shouldn’t stare at teenagers out their windows for “months” and then ask them out while they’re walking alone.

It seems really, really weird that someone has to tell you that.

Men shouldn’t look out their windows and notice people? Men shouldn’t strike up conversations with women who are alone in public in broad daylight? You’ve got to be kidding.

Men should not hit on women who are exercising in public. The fact that he had been ogling her out the window and liked the way she looks in shorts does not give him license to hit on her.

What a weird rule about not talking to women who are exercising outside.

Yet women feel entitled to disturb men when men are walking, at the gym, at a conference minding their own business, etc. If women didn't have double standards, they wouldn't have any standards at all.

When is this? I've never disturbed a man doing any of this stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel gross.

I’m a 42 y/o divorced dad and live in a leafy UMC neighborhood. I WFH full time. For the past few weeks/months I’ve seen someone who looked to be a woman in her 30s speed walking and occasionally running in my neighborhood. She is about 5”3 and wears dark sunglasses, baseball cap, shorts, running sneakers & a tank top. Has long brown hair & is in amazing shape from what I could tell based on looking at her.

Anyway, I was out walking today and saw her. I must’ve startled her by walking far behind her on the same sidewalk. She looked behind, and that’s when I finally decided I would make a move. She looked a little startled, but I introduced myself and we both kept walking together. She quickly started chatting with me, and I complimented her on her walking/running. We were talking about how nice it was out & how hilly the neighborhood is. She spoke like a grown adult & seemed very confident. Anyway, as I was about to make a turn on my route after a few blocks, I asked her if she’d like to meet again and if there was any way I could contact her. She kindly but swiftly shut that down; she said “That is nice of you, but I am going back to college for the summer next week. Good luck with your walking” I said thank you and made a turn.

This girl was probably 19 years old & taking walks from her parents house. I feel like a creep.

A 19/20 year old woman IS a "grown adult woman." She can vote, join the Army, and own property in her own name. Stop infantilizing grown adult women. It' a very weird fetish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eww. Don’t approach women on the street. And if you’re 42, how about looking for women your own age instead of 12 years younger. You didn’t know she was 20, but you for damn sure knew she wasn’t 42. Loser.

Nobody wants to date or marry a 42 year old women. They’re dried up & haggard. Sorry.

I’m sure a 50+ man would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:
Please do not approach women when they are out jogging and walking! I'm a mom and have had this happen and it sucks. Trust me when I say that she was literally out walking and jogging to get a work out. No other reason at all. If you want to meet women, go to target rich environments meant for that.

This is a good point, to be honest. It's exhausting to feel like every activity, no matter how much one is doing it for themselves, is interpreted as an invitation to be asked out. Sometimes we just want to go for a run, even if we do it while cute.

Another woman who has to agree with this. Not only for the just-out-for-a-jog aspect but also the complete stranger part. It just gives me weird feelings like that a young woman can't simply exist in this world without being on display as a piece of meat for a man to feel is his for the choosing. Yes, it sounds like OP was perfectly respectable in his interaction, but the whole thing is creepy and not because of the age difference.

Juxtapose this with the threads by single women asking why they cannot find anyone.

You over exaggerate. You are not being asked out on every activity. It's just not happening. If OP doesn't try his hand, how else does he (or anyone else for that matter) meet people? We complain about online dating but then throw stones at those that try to meet in person.

There's nothing wrong with what you did, OP. You figured her age and backed off. Good for you.

Lol. For someone who likely purports to be an advocate for men, you sure have a low opinion of their capabilities.

Most men can easily understand that there is a time and a place to ask women on a date, and it is not while they are exercising after never having spoken to you before.

I’ve met one man who would literally hang out on street corners trying to pick up women as they walked past. It would work 1/100 times. This dude was possibly the creepiest and most mentally unstable man I have met - he threatened to burn my house down eventually.

how does that even remotely relate to OP who was respectful and left her alone after the rejection? And where was I advocating for young men? Lord, you people read so much into these posts that isn't even there.

Men should ask women out. Women should be able to ask men out. It should be respectful. We shouldn't be scared to talk to one another because of harpies like the PP

42 y/o men shouldn’t stare at teenagers out their windows for “months” and then ask them out while they’re walking alone.

It seems really, really weird that someone has to tell you that.

Men shouldn’t look out their windows and notice people? Men shouldn’t strike up conversations with women who are alone in public in broad daylight? You’ve got to be kidding.

Men should not hit on women who are exercising in public. The fact that he had been ogling her out the window and liked the way she looks in shorts does not give him license to hit on her.

What a weird rule about not talking to women who are exercising outside.

Yet women feel entitled to disturb men when men are walking, at the gym, at a conference minding their own business, etc. If women didn't have double standards, they wouldn't have any standards at all.

What is your evidence that women feel "entitled" to do this?

Evidently, just existing in public without a burka and a chaperone is provocation enough to disturb men like OP.

[Anonymous]

Maybe OP identifies as mid-20's. So there isn't an age gap then. After all, isn't age just a social construct created by the human race? Biology and time on the earth really have nothing to do with it. Rather, it is all about what we choose to identify as.
Problem solved. He is not a creep. And he is trying to date appropriately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Please do not approach women when they are out jogging and walking! I'm a mom and have had this happen and it sucks. Trust me when I say that she was literally out walking and jogging to get a work out. No other reason at all. If you want to meet women, go to target rich environments meant for that.

This is a good point, to be honest. It's exhausting to feel like every activity, no matter how much one is doing it for themselves, is interpreted as an invitation to be asked out. Sometimes we just want to go for a run, even if we do it while cute.

Another woman who has to agree with this. Not only for the just-out-for-a-jog aspect but also the complete stranger part. It just gives me weird feelings like that a young woman can't simply exist in this world without being on display as a piece of meat for a man to feel is his for the choosing. Yes, it sounds like OP was perfectly respectable in his interaction, but the whole thing is creepy and not because of the age difference.

Juxtapose this with the threads by single women asking why they cannot find anyone.

You over exaggerate. You are not being asked out on every activity. It's just not happening. If OP doesn't try his hand, how else does he (or anyone else for that matter) meet people? We complain about online dating but then throw stones at those that try to meet in person.

There's nothing wrong with what you did, OP. You figured her age and backed off. Good for you.

Lol. For someone who likely purports to be an advocate for men, you sure have a low opinion of their capabilities.

Most men can easily understand that there is a time and a place to ask women on a date, and it is not while they are exercising after never having spoken to you before.

I’ve met one man who would literally hang out on street corners trying to pick up women as they walked past. It would work 1/100 times. This dude was possibly the creepiest and most mentally unstable man I have met - he threatened to burn my house down eventually.

how does that even remotely relate to OP who was respectful and left her alone after the rejection? And where was I advocating for young men? Lord, you people read so much into these posts that isn't even there.

Men should ask women out. Women should be able to ask men out. It should be respectful. We shouldn't be scared to talk to one another because of harpies like the PP

42 y/o men shouldn’t stare at teenagers out their windows for “months” and then ask them out while they’re walking alone.

It seems really, really weird that someone has to tell you that.

Men shouldn’t look out their windows and notice people? Men shouldn’t strike up conversations with women who are alone in public in broad daylight? You’ve got to be kidding.

Men should not hit on women who are exercising in public. The fact that he had been ogling her out the window and liked the way she looks in shorts does not give him license to hit on her.

What a weird rule about not talking to women who are exercising outside.

Yet women feel entitled to disturb men when men are walking, at the gym, at a conference minding their own business, etc. If women didn't have double standards, they wouldn't have any standards at all.

What is your evidence that women feel "entitled" to do this?

Evidently, just existing in public without a burka and a chaperone is provocation enough to disturb men like OP.

Don't ever travel outside of the USA if you're under 30, attractive, and don't want attention.

[Anonymous]

You feel gross? Turn in your man card. You couldn’t know her age, and she was over 18.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you need to get a better, more realistic idea of what women your own age look like. It's usually pretty hard to mistake a 19 year old for a late 30s/40 something.

With that said, sometimes 19 year olds look older. I'm a mid 30s women who often gets hit on by men in their early 20s and occasionally late teens and it can be hard to tell at times, especially if theyre tall