Running moms ragged with Teacher Appreciation right before Mother’s Day

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand all these people getting upset at feeding some teachers and sending in some gift cards. Multiple people have said that you don’t have to do anything and certainly not everything. No one will know you didn’t send in fruit or bagels for the staff breakfast. Have your kids write a note or not.

One year, I forgot and my kid brought in a gift card and hand written note the following Monday. One year, I sent in happy birthday gift cards because I didn’t have my act together. This year, I thought staff appreciation was last week and had extra time and participating in all.

Because it has moved from genuinely showing appreciation to expected tasks made up by women for other women to do. The degree of this expectation and obligation various from school to school, but at most schools, it is there. It is no longer a show of gratitude, but another several things (mostly) women feel socially obligated to do.

It feels like a ‘forced appreciation.’

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand all these people getting upset at feeding some teachers and sending in some gift cards. Multiple people have said that you don’t have to do anything and certainly not everything. No one will know you didn’t send in fruit or bagels for the staff breakfast. Have your kids write a note or not.

One year, I forgot and my kid brought in a gift card and hand written note the following Monday. One year, I sent in happy birthday gift cards because I didn’t have my act together. This year, I thought staff appreciation was last week and had extra time and participating in all.

Because it has moved from genuinely showing appreciation to expected tasks made up by women for other women to do. The degree of this expectation and obligation various from school to school, but at most schools, it is there. It is no longer a show of gratitude, but another several things (mostly) women feel socially obligated to do.

I sent it some snacks with my kid to stock up the teacher lounge today. I didn’t feel obligated. I didn’t have to do it. It was easy and I did it. At drop off, I dropped off the snacks and some front office said they loved the snacks I brought in. I saw other parents bringing in tangerines, soda, k cups, etc. these are items you could very easily have picked up at your weekly grocery run.

My kids can make cards today after school and I will write a thank you card. They can take it in tomorrow or the day after.

This sound like something people do to make themselves feel better because they “did” something and can cross it off their list. Is this really appreciation? As a professional, I find it beyond bizarre that sending in granola bars and clementines is somehow doing me a favor or showing gratitude. This is more about PTA and getting pats then about actually thanking teachers. If it was, people would write heart felt personal notes and be done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand all these people getting upset at feeding some teachers and sending in some gift cards. Multiple people have said that you don’t have to do anything and certainly not everything. No one will know you didn’t send in fruit or bagels for the staff breakfast. Have your kids write a note or not.

One year, I forgot and my kid brought in a gift card and hand written note the following Monday. One year, I sent in happy birthday gift cards because I didn’t have my act together. This year, I thought staff appreciation was last week and had extra time and participating in all.

Because it has moved from genuinely showing appreciation to expected tasks made up by women for other women to do. The degree of this expectation and obligation various from school to school, but at most schools, it is there. It is no longer a show of gratitude, but another several things (mostly) women feel socially obligated to do.

I sent it some snacks with my kid to stock up the teacher lounge today. I didn’t feel obligated. I didn’t have to do it. It was easy and I did it. At drop off, I dropped off the snacks and some front office said they loved the snacks I brought in. I saw other parents bringing in tangerines, soda, k cups, etc. these are items you could very easily have picked up at your weekly grocery run.

My kids can make cards today after school and I will write a thank you card. They can take it in tomorrow or the day after.

This sound like something people do to make themselves feel better because they “did” something and can cross it off their list. Is this really appreciation? As a professional, I find it beyond bizarre that sending in granola bars and clementines is somehow doing me a favor or showing gratitude. This is more about PTA and getting pats then about actually thanking teachers. If it was, people would write heart felt personal notes and be done.

Speak for yourself. I have always enjoyed a nice breakfast, lunch or dinner. I appreciate thoughtfulness. I like food and snacks.

DH doesn’t care about this stuff at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:as an exhausted teacher this Mondat morning I appreciated the laughs this thread provided.

you must be the reason our spelling program is non-existent

Grammer nazi

I can’t help myself now…

Your text should read:
“Grammar Nazi.”

[Anonymous]

I do agree the dates could be not right before Mother’s Day. A lot of schools also have Mother’s Day events this week.

[Anonymous]

Since this thread is hot and popping, I have to ask the room: what is the point of contributing to a "class gift" via Venmo to the room parent? The teacher will have no idea who did or didn't contribute, so you're not really showing any "appreciation" from your kid specifically.

I'll probably have my kids make handmade cards this year, but if I did want to give $, I'd make sure it came directly from my child to the teacher, which is what I do at the holidays. It seems like an utter waste of money to give it to a group gift and (to be blunt) not get any credit for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand all these people getting upset at feeding some teachers and sending in some gift cards. Multiple people have said that you don’t have to do anything and certainly not everything. No one will know you didn’t send in fruit or bagels for the staff breakfast. Have your kids write a note or not.

One year, I forgot and my kid brought in a gift card and hand written note the following Monday. One year, I sent in happy birthday gift cards because I didn’t have my act together. This year, I thought staff appreciation was last week and had extra time and participating in all.

Because it has moved from genuinely showing appreciation to expected tasks made up by women for other women to do. The degree of this expectation and obligation various from school to school, but at most schools, it is there. It is no longer a show of gratitude, but another several things (mostly) women feel socially obligated to do.

I sent it some snacks with my kid to stock up the teacher lounge today. I didn’t feel obligated. I didn’t have to do it. It was easy and I did it. At drop off, I dropped off the snacks and some front office said they loved the snacks I brought in. I saw other parents bringing in tangerines, soda, k cups, etc. these are items you could very easily have picked up at your weekly grocery run.

My kids can make cards today after school and I will write a thank you card. They can take it in tomorrow or the day after.

This sound like something people do to make themselves feel better because they “did” something and can cross it off their list. Is this really appreciation? As a professional, I find it beyond bizarre that sending in granola bars and clementines is somehow doing me a favor or showing gratitude. This is more about PTA and getting pats then about actually thanking teachers. If it was, people would write heart felt personal notes and be done.

Speak for yourself. I have always enjoyed a nice breakfast, lunch or dinner. I appreciate thoughtfulness. I like food and snacks.

DH doesn’t care about this stuff at all.

Really? Some mom dropping off a box of Chewy granola bars from Costco makes you feel special?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since this thread is hot and popping, I have to ask the room: what is the point of contributing to a "class gift" via Venmo to the room parent? The teacher will have no idea who did or didn't contribute, so you're not really showing any "appreciation" from your kid specifically.

I'll probably have my kids make handmade cards this year, but if I did want to give $, I'd make sure it came directly from my child to the teacher, which is what I do at the holidays. It seems like an utter waste of money to give it to a group gift and (to be blunt) not get any credit for it.

Our room parent does include names of students who contributed.

[Anonymous]

The best way to show appreciation for teachers is to teach your children to show respect to them, behave, do their homework and, emphatically for parents to stop treating teachers as your children's babysitters and nannies.

The other is to attend school board meetings and find ways to increase teachers pay 50%! FWIW, I am not a teacher.

[Anonymous]

I guess I don't understand why the timing sucks.

Mother's Day is a day and you don't have to do anything for it (Except what you plan for your own moms). I don't think one has anything to do with the other.

Maybe teacher appreciation is held now because teachers are definitely a little burned out themselves and you are showing appreciation for almost the entire year's work.

If you already feel like you've done enough, that's another story but I don't understand why the timing is a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess I don't understand why the timing sucks.

Mother's Day is a day and you don't have to do anything for it (Except what you plan for your own moms). I don't think one has anything to do with the other.

Maybe teacher appreciation is held now because teachers are definitely a little burned out themselves and you are showing appreciation for almost the entire year's work.

If you already feel like you've done enough, that's another story but I don't understand why the timing is a problem.

Not myself, but I do know many women that are stuck planning Mother’s Day brunches and activists for their own immediate family, their mom, DH’s mom and whatever siblings will also be joining in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I don't understand why the timing sucks.

Mother's Day is a day and you don't have to do anything for it (Except what you plan for your own moms). I don't think one has anything to do with the other.

Maybe teacher appreciation is held now because teachers are definitely a little burned out themselves and you are showing appreciation for almost the entire year's work.

If you already feel like you've done enough, that's another story but I don't understand why the timing is a problem.

Not myself, but I do know many women that are stuck planning Mother’s Day brunches and activists for their own immediate family, their mom, DH’s mom and whatever siblings will also be joining in.

It really isn’t that hard to make a brunch reservation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since this thread is hot and popping, I have to ask the room: what is the point of contributing to a "class gift" via Venmo to the room parent? The teacher will have no idea who did or didn't contribute, so you're not really showing any "appreciation" from your kid specifically.

I'll probably have my kids make handmade cards this year, but if I did want to give $, I'd make sure it came directly from my child to the teacher, which is what I do at the holidays. It seems like an utter waste of money to give it to a group gift and (to be blunt) not get any credit for it.

Our room parent does include names of students who contributed.

Which probably makes some parents and kids who don't have disposable income feel like absolute garbage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess I don't understand why the timing sucks.

Mother's Day is a day and you don't have to do anything for it (Except what you plan for your own moms). I don't think one has anything to do with the other.

Maybe teacher appreciation is held now because teachers are definitely a little burned out themselves and you are showing appreciation for almost the entire year's work.

If you already feel like you've done enough, that's another story but I don't understand why the timing is a problem.

Because it's one more hurdle to clear before mom's finally get one damn day of appreciation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I don't understand why the timing sucks.

Mother's Day is a day and you don't have to do anything for it (Except what you plan for your own moms). I don't think one has anything to do with the other.

Maybe teacher appreciation is held now because teachers are definitely a little burned out themselves and you are showing appreciation for almost the entire year's work.

If you already feel like you've done enough, that's another story but I don't understand why the timing is a problem.

Because it's one more hurdle to clear before mom's finally get one damn day of appreciation.

Whine. Fest.