Running moms ragged with Teacher Appreciation right before Mother’s Day

[Anonymous]

Instead of Teacher Appreciation week, we do Staff Appreciation month. Once a week, there is something for staff. The work is spread out and there’s less pressure to get it all done in one week.

Last week we (the PTO) paid for an ice cream food truck to come for a couple of hours at lunchtime. This coming week we’re catering a lunch. The following week we’re setting up a candy bar. The last week is stocking the lounges and fridges with drinks & snacks.

Different parents sign up for the one event that week. Staff appreciates having it spread out.

[Anonymous]

People things are putting in this thread that aren’t true:
1) I buy “trinkets” when the reality is I only buy gift cards and then contribute to PTA-sponsored meals

2) My kids aren’t well-behaved? Where did that come from? My kids have never had a single behavior problem at school, and get outstanding grades.

Anything else you want to make up and invent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People things are putting in this thread that aren’t true:
1) I buy “trinkets” when the reality is I only buy gift cards and then contribute to PTA-sponsored meals

2) My kids aren’t well-behaved? Where did that come from? My kids have never had a single behavior problem at school, and get outstanding grades.

Anything else you want to make up and invent?

No one said that. Someone said the best way to appreciate staff is to make sure your kid is well behaved. If you're doing that, great job.

[Anonymous]

I'm a room parent and the treasurer for the class fund, when we collected $25 from most families. Our school does a gift for each day. We have $100 budgeted for the week and my co-room parent is coming up with all of these elaborate gifts that are way over budget. Obviously, anyone can come up with expensive gift ideas, but this will require us to come out of pocket. You have to be more creative to make it fit within the budget. I'm already volunteering my time and did the class parties, holiday gift, teacher bday, etc. I don't want to come out of pocket on top of it. I'm also more practical. Gift baskets, mugs, candles, etc are such a waste in my opinion.

[Anonymous]

Teacher gifts are way out of hand. Civil servants are not supposed to receive gifts.

[Anonymous]

And don't get me started on the door decoration....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give cash to teachers. That is what I do. I give gift cards to all my kid's teachers.

OP here. I…literally said in my original post that I give gift cards to teachers. I don’t get them cutesy crap, just a gift card and a note, and then I also make a contribution to whatever the PTA is doing, like muffins or napkins or something. I consider that to be pretty bare bones, but still…all of it is a lot on top of everything else moms do. I think it would be much nicer if Teacher Appreciation was at the end of the school year or something, not right before Mother’s Day.

This seems like such a minor commitment that it’s hard to see why it matters that it’s right before Mother’s Day. Also every single thing you mentioned can be done at any point in time during the school year. Pick a week in September and run to the store and get a gift card, a card and some napkins. Heck you could do it once and purchase everything for all six or seven years of your kid’s elementary years - none of this is perishable.

[Anonymous]

The solution to this would, of course, be for schools and PTAs to LOUDLY announce that Teacher Appreciation week is an event where men in the community honor teachers.

Instead, a bunch of women will pressure a bunch of other women to sacrifice time, energy, and sanity to honor other women and men will.. do nothing. As always. Very cool, I love our society, no notes./s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who planned this? Every damn year, the week leading up to Mother’s Day is Teacher A-Freaking-ppreciation Week. I appreciate teachers and do more than my part to celebrate them multiple times a year—gift cards and buying from Amazon wish lists multiple times a year, contributing to numerous PTA lunches and coffee carts, volunteering as a chaperone and helping with class parties, on and on. I do gift cards, notes, and a SignUpGenius contribution for the Teacher Appreciation Week stuff.

But why must we run mother’s ragged during this specific time? It’s like squeeze all the juice out of the lemon before celebrating moms on one DAY after they’ve spent a week doing things for teachers. It’s a lot, on top of a full-time job and all the other things we do as moms.

Easy. The teachers spend more time with your snowflakes than you and they don't like it any better than you.

[Anonymous]

I did none of that. My kids wrote notes, and that was it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give cash to teachers. That is what I do. I give gift cards to all my kid's teachers.

OP here. I…literally said in my original post that I give gift cards to teachers. I don’t get them cutesy crap, just a gift card and a note, and then I also make a contribution to whatever the PTA is doing, like muffins or napkins or something. I consider that to be pretty bare bones, but still…all of it is a lot on top of everything else moms do. I think it would be much nicer if Teacher Appreciation was at the end of the school year or something, not right before Mother’s Day.

This seems like such a minor commitment that it’s hard to see why it matters that it’s right before Mother’s Day. Also every single thing you mentioned can be done at any point in time during the school year. Pick a week in September and run to the store and get a gift card, a card and some napkins. Heck you could do it once and purchase everything for all six or seven years of your kid’s elementary years - none of this is perishable.

While I agree with you, PTA's put pressure on parents to do it during Teacher Appreciation week. And when I say they pressure parents, you and I both know that in most families, this means moms.

Oh, and like a lot of moms of young kids, I will put more effort into celebrating my own my and my MIL this year than anyone will put into celebrating me. Because if I leave it to my DH, he won't do anything for his mom and she'll be sad and I'll feel bad for her. If I want to do anything for Mother's Day, I will also largely have to plan it myself, as I do my own birthday. I generally resolve this by not really caring about Mother's Day, because at least then I don't have to make my own plans.

So it's really more about the expectations and the way they fall on my moms (and never, ever on dads -- a dad who does something for Teacher Appreciation weeks is Dad of the Year in most people's eyes, same with the guy who sends his MIL a Mother's Day gift) and how we can't even create a stupid fake holiday for moms without somehow turning it into an obligation for them.

We just obligate women, constantly, to supporting and helping others, we even obligate them to help themselves. And we don't do the same for men. This is just a really good example of that.

[Anonymous]

Why are you so defensive, OP?

We assumed you were running a large complex event the way you were venting. If you're doing gifts cards and baking, then stop. You don't need to do ANYTHING AT ALL. The teachers won't hate you, or your kids, for not doing anything.

ALSO, YOU DON'T NEED TO DO ANYTHING FOR MOTHER'S DAY.

Because I've got a feeling you're the type to write a thread about it...

Life can be so simple, you know. Enjoy it. Relax. Don't lift a finger unless you're absolutely sure this is what you want to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Instead of Teacher Appreciation week, we do Staff Appreciation month. Once a week, there is something for staff. The work is spread out and there’s less pressure to get it all done in one week.

Last week we (the PTO) paid for an ice cream food truck to come for a couple of hours at lunchtime. This coming week we’re catering a lunch. The following week we’re setting up a candy bar. The last week is stocking the lounges and fridges with drinks & snacks.

Different parents sign up for the one event that week. Staff appreciates having it spread out.

I honestly can’t decide which is worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give cash to teachers. That is what I do. I give gift cards to all my kid's teachers.

OP here. I…literally said in my original post that I give gift cards to teachers. I don’t get them cutesy crap, just a gift card and a note, and then I also make a contribution to whatever the PTA is doing, like muffins or napkins or something. I consider that to be pretty bare bones, but still…all of it is a lot on top of everything else moms do. I think it would be much nicer if Teacher Appreciation was at the end of the school year or something, not right before Mother’s Day.

This seems like such a minor commitment that it’s hard to see why it matters that it’s right before Mother’s Day. Also every single thing you mentioned can be done at any point in time during the school year. Pick a week in September and run to the store and get a gift card, a card and some napkins. Heck you could do it once and purchase everything for all six or seven years of your kid’s elementary years - none of this is perishable.

Do you mean like do it in September, which many of us already do to prepare for *teacher holiday gifts*?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Instead of Teacher Appreciation week, we do Staff Appreciation month. Once a week, there is something for staff. The work is spread out and there’s less pressure to get it all done in one week.

Last week we (the PTO) paid for an ice cream food truck to come for a couple of hours at lunchtime. This coming week we’re catering a lunch. The following week we’re setting up a candy bar. The last week is stocking the lounges and fridges with drinks & snacks.

Different parents sign up for the one event that week. Staff appreciates having it spread out.

I honestly can’t decide which is worse.

Well, if you’re OP who is exhausted from doing everything in one week, then this is better.

At the end of the day, do whatever you can and want to do. Just don’t be rude about it or rude to teachers. It’s rough out there right now.