NYTs Etiquette - "I Refused to Switch Seats on a Plane. Twice. Was I Wrong?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Well that's easy just swap seats with your husband. Or let him watch the toddler!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

It’s absolutely happened to me.

[Anonymous]

FWIW we had purchased seats together. When we showed up at the airport, there had been a flight delay for an earlier flight to the same destination. The airline started asking for people to give up seats, when no one did they started bumping. They somehow thought bumping my 2 ES age kids off the flight made some sort of sense. We managed to all get on the flight but of course had no hope of sitting together. So my kids were dispersed throughout the plane. There was nothing I could do about it if I wanted to make it to my destination on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Is your husband incapable of caring for your toddler? One parent for one kid is perfectly acceptable.

We'd paid for our seating allocation, and it annoys me when airlines move women around because they think they won't complain. Never happens to my husband. Why shouldn't I have been allowed to travel with my family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Is your husband incapable of caring for your toddler? One parent for one kid is perfectly acceptable.

We'd paid for our seating allocation, and it annoys me when airlines move women around because they think they won't complain. Never happens to my husband. Why shouldn't I have been allowed to travel with my family?

I would be thrilled to be separated. Would grab my book and run to my newly assigned seat and enjoy a nice peaceful flight. You are allowed to travel with your family, you're just being inflexible and difficult about seating assignments. You could just roll with the punches.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Is your husband incapable of caring for your toddler? One parent for one kid is perfectly acceptable.

We'd paid for our seating allocation, and it annoys me when airlines move women around because they think they won't complain. Never happens to my husband. Why shouldn't I have been allowed to travel with my family?

I would be thrilled to be separated. Would grab my book and run to my newly assigned seat and enjoy a nice peaceful flight. You are allowed to travel with your family, you're just being inflexible and difficult about seating assignments. You could just roll with the punches.

+1. Add this to the reasons not to change your name. “Sorry, hun, happened again! Hope you and Larlo have a great flight!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Is your husband incapable of caring for your toddler? One parent for one kid is perfectly acceptable.

We'd paid for our seating allocation, and it annoys me when airlines move women around because they think they won't complain. Never happens to my husband. Why shouldn't I have been allowed to travel with my family?

I would be thrilled to be separated. Would grab my book and run to my newly assigned seat and enjoy a nice peaceful flight. You are allowed to travel with your family, you're just being inflexible and difficult about seating assignments. You could just roll with the punches.

What? The bonus of sitting next to your two year old is that they are tiny and you get heaps more shoulder room. You can lift the arm rests. Why would I want to be shoved into a middle seat between two massive linebackers when I've paid extra to sit with my child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Is your husband incapable of caring for your toddler? One parent for one kid is perfectly acceptable.

We'd paid for our seating allocation, and it annoys me when airlines move women around because they think they won't complain. Never happens to my husband. Why shouldn't I have been allowed to travel with my family?

I would be thrilled to be separated. Would grab my book and run to my newly assigned seat and enjoy a nice peaceful flight. You are allowed to travel with your family, you're just being inflexible and difficult about seating assignments. You could just roll with the punches.

What? The bonus of sitting next to your two year old is that they are tiny and you get heaps more shoulder room. You can lift the arm rests. Why would I want to be shoved into a middle seat between two massive linebackers when I've paid extra to sit with my child?

There aren't a lot of bonuses to sitting next to 2 year olds. If it's such a big deal swap with your husband. Nobody is going to check. But I'd rather not deal with all the demands, snacks, dropped toys, diaper changes, and the other fun of traveling with a 2 year olds. Your kid will be fine sitting away from you for a few hours when the other parent is right there. You can switch mid flight, you can walk down and visit them, this is really not the big ordeal you're making it out to be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

I got moved away from my husband and son because I failed to change my surname at marriage and the airline decided I could therefore be separated from my toddler.

Is your husband incapable of caring for your toddler? One parent for one kid is perfectly acceptable.

So your basic argument is that airlines can charge for services like seating allocations, and that they can change them at will and that the affected passenger should just be flexible?

We'd paid for our seating allocation, and it annoys me when airlines move women around because they think they won't complain. Never happens to my husband. Why shouldn't I have been allowed to travel with my family?

I would be thrilled to be separated. Would grab my book and run to my newly assigned seat and enjoy a nice peaceful flight. You are allowed to travel with your family, you're just being inflexible and difficult about seating assignments. You could just roll with the punches.

What? The bonus of sitting next to your two year old is that they are tiny and you get heaps more shoulder room. You can lift the arm rests. Why would I want to be shoved into a middle seat between two massive linebackers when I've paid extra to sit with my child?

There aren't a lot of bonuses to sitting next to 2 year olds. If it's such a big deal swap with your husband. Nobody is going to check. But I'd rather not deal with all the demands, snacks, dropped toys, diaper changes, and the other fun of traveling with a 2 year olds. Your kid will be fine sitting away from you for a few hours when the other parent is right there. You can switch mid flight, you can walk down and visit them, this is really not the big ordeal you're making it out to be.

[Anonymous]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/travel/two-kids-two-parents-no-overhead-bags-or-reserved-seats-could-they-survive-economy-light/2019/08/08/b6332854-afbd-11e9-bc5c-e73b603e7f38_story.html

This thread made me think of this article. Despite saying that the fare was not family-friendly for seating, the writer booked anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/travel/two-kids-two-parents-no-overhead-bags-or-reserved-seats-could-they-survive-economy-light/2019/08/08/b6332854-afbd-11e9-bc5c-e73b603e7f38_story.html

This thread made me think of this article. Despite saying that the fare was not family-friendly for seating, the writer booked anyway.

I'd vote for:

- People who paid extra for good seats shouldn't ever have to move to cheaper seats, except in a life-or-death emergency. Example: To get that person with the great seat away from someone with Ebola.

- Nice people with ordinary seats should accommodate parents of children under about 8 if the parents and the children have been separated because of unexpected travel problems, such as flight cancellations that have disrupted a family's travel plans, or because the airline changed planes and failed to give a parent and small child adjacent seats.

- Other travelers don't have any moral obligation to move if parents had a chance to book adjacent seats and were too cheap or foolish to do so. But, in a situation like that, I personally would probably move, just to be nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/travel/two-kids-two-parents-no-overhead-bags-or-reserved-seats-could-they-survive-economy-light/2019/08/08/b6332854-afbd-11e9-bc5c-e73b603e7f38_story.html

This thread made me think of this article. Despite saying that the fare was not family-friendly for seating, the writer booked anyway.

I'd vote for:

- People who paid extra for good seats shouldn't ever have to move to cheaper seats, except in a life-or-death emergency. Example: To get that person with the great seat away from someone with Ebola.

- Nice people with ordinary seats should accommodate parents of children under about 8 if the parents and the children have been separated because of unexpected travel problems, such as flight cancellations that have disrupted a family's travel plans, or because the airline changed planes and failed to give a parent and small child adjacent seats.

- Other travelers don't have any moral obligation to move if parents had a chance to book adjacent seats and were too cheap or foolish to do so. But, in a situation like that, I personally would probably move, just to be nice.

Erm, what? I don't think someone bleeding from their eyeballs is going to be permitted onto a plane in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/travel/two-kids-two-parents-no-overhead-bags-or-reserved-seats-could-they-survive-economy-light/2019/08/08/b6332854-afbd-11e9-bc5c-e73b603e7f38_story.html

This thread made me think of this article. Despite saying that the fare was not family-friendly for seating, the writer booked anyway.

I'd vote for:

- People who paid extra for good seats shouldn't ever have to move to cheaper seats, except in a life-or-death emergency. Example: To get that person with the great seat away from someone with Ebola.

- Nice people with ordinary seats should accommodate parents of children under about 8 if the parents and the children have been separated because of unexpected travel problems, such as flight cancellations that have disrupted a family's travel plans, or because the airline changed planes and failed to give a parent and small child adjacent seats.

- Other travelers don't have any moral obligation to move if parents had a chance to book adjacent seats and were too cheap or foolish to do so. But, in a situation like that, I personally would probably move, just to be nice.

Erm, what? I don't think someone bleeding from their eyeballs is going to be permitted onto a plane in the first place.

NP I've gotten moved promptly when seat mates start vomiting or had diarrhea (true story- a colostomy bag leaked everywhere and it was BAD)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting to hear that families who paid a premium to choose seats together with children got separated, as in all of my traveling, that never happened to me and my kids. I always paid the extra fee to ensure we sat together and regardless of the airline, That’s always been honored. That said, I have definitely been on airplanes where the flight attendants walk up and down the aisle looking for people to change seats to accommodate a family with small children. I always assumed that they did not pay the extra fee and that’s why that happened. But it looks like, from some of these responses, I might have been wrong in that assumption.

I agree with this. My kids are teenagers now, but I have never had a situation where we chose seats before traveling and when we got to the airport, the seats had been moved and we were split up. Does this really happen a lot?

I’m sure it’s rare, but that it happens.

yes. when your flight gets cancelled and they automatically re-book you, you don't get seated together. We had 3 flights changed when we were trying to get home after traveling over the holidays when the Omicron surge was causing 1,000s of flight cancellations. We had paid for premium seats, premium times, paid to sit together, and it was still a mess (which OF COURSE I understand, the airlines were dealing with massive staff shortages).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/travel/two-kids-two-parents-no-overhead-bags-or-reserved-seats-could-they-survive-economy-light/2019/08/08/b6332854-afbd-11e9-bc5c-e73b603e7f38_story.html

This thread made me think of this article. Despite saying that the fare was not family-friendly for seating, the writer booked anyway.

I'd vote for:

- People who paid extra for good seats shouldn't ever have to move to cheaper seats, except in a life-or-death emergency. Example: To get that person with the great seat away from someone with Ebola.

- Nice people with ordinary seats should accommodate parents of children under about 8 if the parents and the children have been separated because of unexpected travel problems, such as flight cancellations that have disrupted a family's travel plans, or because the airline changed planes and failed to give a parent and small child adjacent seats.

- Other travelers don't have any moral obligation to move if parents had a chance to book adjacent seats and were too cheap or foolish to do so. But, in a situation like that, I personally would probably move, just to be nice.

Erm, what? I don't think someone bleeding from their eyeballs is going to be permitted onto a plane in the first place.

NP I've gotten moved promptly when seat mates start vomiting or had diarrhea (true story- a colostomy bag leaked everywhere and it was BAD)

Sure, but if someone has EBOLA they should not be flying.