NYTs Etiquette - "I Refused to Switch Seats on a Plane. Twice. Was I Wrong?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Once again, for the people in back: it.was.a.woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

[Anonymous]

Just saw this on Reddit. There is no more appropriate link that could be posted.https://www.reddit.com/r/maybemaybemaybe/comments/tpdhc7/maybe_maybe_maybe/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just saw this on Reddit. There is no more appropriate link that could be posted.https://www.reddit.com/r/maybemaybemaybe/comments/tpdhc7/maybe_maybe_maybe/

OK, for this one, it would depend. If I'd seen the approach a million times and it wasn't that special, yeah, I'd give the kid my window seat for landing. But if I specifically chose the seat (and the side of the plane) for an approach I love, NOPE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s behind a paywall so I can’t read the article and comment. Please remember not everyone has a subscription to NYT. These posts with links that people can’t see are annoying.

If you're already hitting the paywall, it means you've read your articles for the month.

Subscribe you cheap f#ck. Good journalism isn't free.

It is questionable that NYT is "good journalism". - signed immigrant New Yorker

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

We need to start holding airlines accountable. This is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

We need to start holding airlines accountable. This is ridiculous.

No, we need to hold buyers accountable. Don’t book basic economy and then complain you don’t like the terms of basic economy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Airlines need to stop extorting parents. It should be automatic parents get seated next to their minor child. They shouldn’t have to pay extra fees to be able to supervise their own child.

They are extorting everyone. Don't like it, don't fly.

+1

As a consumer you demand greater accommodations and thus have to plan and/or pay accordingly. If you go to a sports event, concert, or even dinner outing - the same principles apply. Businesses don’t owe families accommodations just because. Gather up your bags and pack into the car for an intimate road trip if you wish to avoid being “extorted.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

We need to start holding airlines accountable. This is ridiculous.

Accountable for what? It’s not a public service. You as the consumer are empowered to vote with your spent dollars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

We need to start holding airlines accountable. This is ridiculous.

No, we need to hold buyers accountable. Don’t book basic economy and then complain you don’t like the terms of basic economy.

+1,000,000. You are given MULTIPLE warnings about exactly this when you book basic economy. Read what you’re agreeing to before entering into a contract.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

We need to start holding airlines accountable. This is ridiculous.

No, we need to hold buyers accountable. Don’t book basic economy and then complain you don’t like the terms of basic economy.

+1,000,000. You are given MULTIPLE warnings about exactly this when you book basic economy. Read what you’re agreeing to before entering into a contract.

Totally agree. Airlines want you to pay for desirable seats. The payers get to keep what they bought. Non-payers can sit in middle seats and be separated from their children. Not paying for adjacent seats in advance if trying to get something for free at the expense of those who paid. Shady.

[Anonymous]

https://www.transportation.gov/individuals/aviation-consumer-protection/family-seating/June-2022-notice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still remember the first time I ever really asserted myself as an adult. I was 20 and flying back from Japan and had reserved an aisle seat. A woman asked me to switch with her 12 year old in the middle row ahead so she could sit with him. I said no because there was no way I was spending a 14 hour flight in a middle seat, especially for an older kid. If it had been a toddler, maybe. Everyone around me gave me dirty looks but I noticed no one else offered to switch either. The lady made a big scene and the flight attendant instructed me to give her my seat and then bumped me to first class. It was amazing. I flew back and forth from Japan regularly for several years and that was the only time I ever arrived feeling okay and not exhausted from the flight. But obviously wouldn't happen now with the way flights are over-subscribed.

Anyway, whatever. The man paid for the seat, he wasn't wrong. He could have been kinder if he'd wanted but that's not the same as being wrong.

Electing to keep the seat she paid for is not her being unkind. This is not on her.

+1000.

We need to start holding airlines accountable. This is ridiculous.

No, we need to hold buyers accountable. Don’t book basic economy and then complain you don’t like the terms of basic economy.

+1,000,000. You are given MULTIPLE warnings about exactly this when you book basic economy. Read what you’re agreeing to before entering into a contract.

Ok, but this type of situation pre-dates basic economy. There are all kinds of reasons that families get separated on a plane even when they originally book the seats together. Flying anything other than southwest gives me anxiety these days because I don’t trust that the seats i book will actually be the seats we get in the travel day.

Also, I wonder if the airlines are getting a bit better about this as the most recent time I booked American, it seemed you had to deliberately select basic economy, whereas in the past I seem to recall that coming up as the default and then you had to “upgrade” to regular economy.

[Anonymous]

Let it die.

All the viewpoints were discussed months ago.