How to *nicely* reprimand an employee...
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Anonymous
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I am an attorney who supervises several people in my department, one of whom has worked for my firm and for me for over 10 years.
We have become somewhat friends over the years, and the person in question confides in me (unsolicited) about all sorts of issues going on in her family. She has invited me over for dinner several times, gets me birthday presents, and makes other friendly gestures. The past month and a half, she has been coming into work every day 30 minutes late. It's always a problem with traffic, something with the kids, or the kids teachers did something to her kids, etc. Then there have been a few days here and there where she's needed a doctor's appointment, had a meeting with her child's teacher, been on jury duty, or some similar excuse but then taken off the entire day. I am an old softie, I'll admit it. But it is really starting to make me mad that she is likely taking advantage. I know she will take whatever I say about this really seriously and will feel terrible, so I am trying to think of a way to tell her to get her act together without being overly harsh. (She is one of those people who would be harder on herself than anyone else could be). My department is all the sudden slammed with work, and I really need her there and to bring her "A" game. Any advice on what I might gently say to this employee I truly love, but who is slacking off lately? |
Anonymous
Say what you said (the bolded part). Keep it business focused. "All of us have Life Happens events, but right now we are suddenly slammed with work, and I really need you to be here and be very focused on getting stuff done." |
Anonymous
| Hi Mary. I'd like to talk to you about your work attendance. While we have flexible hours, you've been taking too much advantage of the flexible hours. As you know, we've been slammed with a lot of work and I really need you to be be here during regular business hours and to be focused on getting work done because we're in a crunch. From now on, I'd like to request that you adhere to some core hours (state the core hours). There's still some flexibility, but you shouldn't be flexing outside the core hours more than X (50%, 2 days a week, 4 days a pay period, whatever). I'm sorry if this complicates issues for you and your family, but I hope you understand that we really need the entire team here to get the work done. |
Anonymous
| Send an email to all 10 of your subordinates reminding them that need to arrive on time. |
Anonymous
| I once had a phenomenal assistant whom I was, nevertheless, ordered to reprimand by my own boss. (My assistant had accidentally left a laptop sitting out, unattended, in a hotel for half an hour or so, and my boss had seen it). I brought my assistant into my office, closed the door and said, "You are an amazing assistant. You astonish me every day with the things you do that I would never have thought possible. So, I suppose it should not surprise me that you have even managed to do something that requires me to give you some mild criticism -- another thing I would have thought impossible!" My assistant burst out laughing, said "The computer, right? I saw (boss's) face. I'm really sorry. It won't happen again." And to her credit, it did not. |
Anonymous
| Sort of along what other people are saying. I've been noticing you are coming about 30 minutes late, we really need to have you here for x and value your input. Do you need to change your core hours to start 30 minutes later and have me change our team meetings to start at x time? Is there something I could do that would help you with this issue? If you approach it from a standpoint of complimenting that you need/value that person, and trying to help them come up with solutions to their situation while still meeting the client or work standards, I think you will get further. Either the person will take a long look and realize, yep I have been slacking and I need to make a stronger effort to get here at x time since clearly you have called attention to it being an issue albeit in a nice way or yes, you are right, I often have to meet with my kids teachers in the morning and it would work better to start my work schedule 30 minutes later, thank you for suggesting this. Partner with Mary in coming up with how she can reasonably solve the problem and if there is something within your power to help. |
Anonymous
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I'm having this exact conversation with one of my employees tomorrow and here's what I'm going to say:
Mary, you are a very valuable employee and people look up to you as a role model. I also know that you can probably get about 8 hours of work done in about 7 hours, however, that is not the case for everyone here and other people have started to hint at coming in later for various reasons and unfortunately due to the size of our team, I can't make an exception for one person and not the others so I really need you here at 9:00 am for the sake of the team unity. Does that sound reasonable? Your employee sounds like a nice person and very reasonable so maybe her kids school schedule has changed, she drops off the kid instead of dad, etc. and there may be a valid reason where she would need to change her schedule, but if not, I think she'll quickly go back to her 9:00 arrival. Good luck! |
Anonymous
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I'd also suggest you ask her if there is something going on outside the office that is causing her to be late. Maybe she's having a childcare, health, spouse, car or even work problem that has affected her ability to get there on time.
Maybe start the conversation by saying: "Mary, I've noticed that you've been arriving late frequently over the last six months. I know you've mentioned car trouble, etc., but I wanted to make sure there isn't an ongoing issue that is making it hard to make it to work by 9 (or whenever)." Then, if she says, no, it's just a confluence of events, or, I'll do better, you can launch into the "You really need to be here line." But, by giving her an opportunity to explain, you might find out she has a more serious issue that you can help resolve, or might want to give her added flexibility to address, etc. Just my two cents. |
Anonymous
| sorry - last six WEEKS, not months. |
Anonymous
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She's coming in thirty minutes late? What is this, 1976? Why isn't your office on Flexiglide? Why can't she come in thirty minutes late and work an extra hour, or an extra thirty minutes? Why have this conversation at all? Why is it your business? Why are you up in your staff's personal life like they were four years old. Welcome to 2012.
Attorney manager. |
Anonymous
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If you really want to be nice about it, ask her if she would like to change her core hours. Not need for long lectures and hysterics..."Mary, do you think changing your starting hours to (30 minutes later) would be helpful? that way you will have enough time to get personal things done in the mornings and you won't have to eat into your vacation/sick time".
Make it her decision, if she's the perceptive type, she will get the hint that you have noticed her perpetual lateness. |
Anonymous
| I think in this case since you have a long relationship and since you are friends as well as manager/subordinate, you do need to be as professional as possible, while at the same time, pointing out how awkward the conversation is for you. |
Anonymous
Are you for real? She is on flex time, and is still late! Don't judge because you don't know the office where I work or our circumstances. God, why is there always one person like you in EVERY DCUM discussion??! |
Anonymous
I was wondering this exact same thing. 30 minutes shouldn't be a big deal if she gets her work done, works through lunch, stays later or whatever. She is, afterall, presumably a salaried employee. Being on time ALL OF THE TIME is difficult when you are a parent - it's just the truth. Maybe your office should adopt more flexible policies? |
Anonymous
Are you kidding me? No it isn't! There are tons of jobs where you don't have flex time. Do you think physicians get to roll into their ER shifts whenever they feel like it? Hourly wage workers show up when the mood strikes them? What a bunch of entitled nitwits. 
Get your act together and get to work on time. |