How does public assistance (welfare) work?

Anonymous
There is a mom at my son's school who is new to the school. She has 7 kids, one of which is in my son's class. The mom is very open about being on welfare, etc. She doesn't work and neither does her husband who is a drunk (her words). He occasionally comes to school events drunk too. She is pregnant with #8. The older two kids are in jail or juvenile detention. She just brought in gifts for every student for XMAS. They cost at least $10 each and she gave every teacher nice gifts too. It bothers me that she is spending excessive amounts of money she didn't earn on things like this. She came in for the holiday party bringing lots of food even though the room mom already had food, etc set up before the party. She went overboard at Halloween too with gifts. So, how does welfare work? Are families just given a check every month to spend at their discretion? I know she gets food stamps too but I always thought they could only be used on certain items like milk and bread and eggs. Yes, I know this isn't my business but in a way, it is. This is tax payer's money being used for completely unnecessary items. If I want to buy something unnecessary, I can justify it by working overtime.
Anonymous
In my experience working with families who receive welfare, those that are generational or life long welfare recipients (grew up on welfare, on welfare as an adult) often have a very poor understanding of money / budgeting and very limited financial management skills. It is often important to them to use the money they have to be generous and kind and to do things for others. They buy gifts, take friends and family out for meals etc as part of being caring, considerate giving people. They don't want to stand out as the poor people who never contribute or never do anything nice for others. The problem is this comes at the expense of the rest of the month. One family I worked with always brought me a gift each month to show their appreciation and after paying a few bills, spent the rest on gifts for others. By the 3rd or 4th of the month they had $0 left for the rest of the month.

OP - regardless of how they spend the money they get a set amount so it is costing the same tax wise - they don't get more each month if they spent the money on gifts.
Anonymous
MYOB.
Anonymous
Thanks 11:11. I won't mind my own business b/c this is everyone's business. Since there is such a thing as generational poverty, that means that there is no end to the money that people of welfare will receive, right? They will just get a check every month forever even if they never even look for a job? If so, what is the motivation for them to get off welfare? Even unemployment benefits run out eventually so there is absolutely motivation to look for a job and look for one quickly. I think it is nice that this mother wants to think of others but she is being thoughtful with other people's money. I'd rather see that money be used for something that would go towards getting them off welfare like job training.
Anonymous
Cash assistance is very limited and is only available for a short amount if time. Disability income is not a lot of money to live on. Food stamps can be used to buy almost any kind of unprepared food. Housing assistance is not given directly to families. They pay reduced rent.
Anonymous
Since welfare reform under Clinton, there have been specific time limits on income support. States have discretion about the length of time people can participate, but the federal allowable maximum is 5 years. Some states allow much less, e.g., the cap in VA is 2 years. States are allowed to exempt a percentage of their caseloads from the time limit though (maybe up to 20%?). People are usually exempt from the time limit because of situations like domestic violence in the home, grandparents caring for grandchildren, and/or disabled parent or child in the family. Google TANF (Temporary Assistance to Needy Families) if you want to learn more.
Anonymous
Or it could be that a family member gave her money to spend on these items so that she could have a sense of giving to the class and feeling good about herself. You don't know, so mind your own business. This is a horribly judgmental post.
Anonymous
The other factor to keep in mind is that poor people often rely on friends and family for help when they need it most, so that when they do have a little money, they are likely to share it. More likely than those of us who are better off.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:In my experience working with families who receive welfare, those that are generational or life long welfare recipients (grew up on welfare, on welfare as an adult) often have a very poor understanding of money / budgeting and very limited financial management skills. It is often important to them to use the money they have to be generous and kind and to do things for others. They buy gifts, take friends and family out for meals etc as part of being caring, considerate giving people. They don't want to stand out as the poor people who never contribute or never do anything nice for others. The problem is this comes at the expense of the rest of the month. One family I worked with always brought me a gift each month to show their appreciation and after paying a few bills, spent the rest on gifts for others. By the 3rd or 4th of the month they had $0 left for the rest of the month.
OP - regardless of how they spend the money they get a set amount so it is costing the same tax wise - they don't get more each month if they spent the money on gifts.


If by the 3rd or 4th of the month you have nothing left, how do you live for the rest of the month?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Thanks 11:11. I won't mind my own business b/c this is everyone's business. Since there is such a thing as generational poverty, that means that there is no end to the money that people of welfare will receive, right? They will just get a check every month forever even if they never even look for a job? If so, what is the motivation for them to get off welfare? Even unemployment benefits run out eventually so there is absolutely motivation to look for a job and look for one quickly. I think it is nice that this mother wants to think of others but she is being thoughtful with other people's money. I'd rather see that money be used for something that would go towards getting them off welfare like job training.


You need to MYOB! From what I have seen of welfa,re people run out of money by the End of the month. Chances are she or dh has an off the books business and I reiterate MYOB.
Anonymous
I doubt that. He is a drunk. Not a business owner. I feel sorry for the mom b/c she thinks she is stuck with him.
Anonymous
Seriously save your pity and MYOB.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:In my experience working with families who receive welfare, those that are generational or life long welfare recipients (grew up on welfare, on welfare as an adult) often have a very poor understanding of money / budgeting and very limited financial management skills. It is often important to them to use the money they have to be generous and kind and to do things for others. They buy gifts, take friends and family out for meals etc as part of being caring, considerate giving people. They don't want to stand out as the poor people who never contribute or never do anything nice for others. The problem is this comes at the expense of the rest of the month. One family I worked with always brought me a gift each month to show their appreciation and after paying a few bills, spent the rest on gifts for others. By the 3rd or 4th of the month they had $0 left for the rest of the month.

OP - regardless of how they spend the money they get a set amount so it is costing the same tax wise - they don't get more each month if they spent the money on gifts.


This is very insightful. I didn't think of that. I remember when I graduated from college during the early 1990s recession and couldn't find a job, I went overboard buying gifts (using my credit card) for friends and family at Christmas. My sister got very angry with me because I was spending money I didn't have, but it was the only way I could think of to show how much I cared. I totally see now the mentality I must have had at that time.

To the OP, the woman you posted about undoubtedly has a shitty life, regardless of the amount of assistance she receives - but in her mind, she really has no other choice. She has 7 kids. She can't afford to work, because daycare costs alone would break her. She's stuck with a drunk husband, who probably forces her to sleep with him. She probably isn't educated about birth control, or else she's leaving her fertility in the hands of God. Whatever. It's no joy living on welfare; it's not an easy life.
Anonymous
Popping out child after child with no means to support them is disgusting. The idea that this woman might be ignorant about birth control after popping out 7 kids is ridiculous.
Anonymous
Instead of pitying her why arent you proactive about the people that may end up like her. Financial books for those food pantries and clothing closets.There are ways to do something about this if it bothers you so much. MYOB or do something about it.
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