Watching your friends relocate to the burbs for "schools"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm AA and left for the burbs because I sought more diversity for my children. DC is pretty segregated along race and class.

I am considering a move to the DC area from Brooklyn and am also concerned about the lack of diversity in many of the neighborhoods I have looked at in the District. Several people have told me I may find more diversity in certain suburbs - Silver Springs and Takoma Park? Are there others I should consider? I was very reluctant to consider suburban living because I love urban life. But the things I value about urban life - walkability to local businesses/parks/playgrounds, diversity (racial/religious/socio-economic/family makeup), and community activism/involvement - I am realizing are not a guarantee in the District. If these things are priorities for me - along with schools and, let's be honest, getting more house for the money - which suburbs should I consider?

NP, NYC transplant here. We are from Manhattan so not exactly the same as Brooklyn but struggled at first with the move for the same reasons you've mentioned. I found everything west of the park to be painfully suburban. We ended up in what they're calling North Shaw now (I know, I know, but I'm lazy and it's an easy description) and it's not so bad. It's not NYC, but it's pretty lively, good restaurants, walkable (we don't own a car) and relatively diverse. Having just looked around, the cost per square foot is very high here relative to other neighborhoods but it probably won't phase you if you're coming from New York. Everything still feels like a deal here. Our DCPS schools, especially at the upper levels, are stiff iffy though.

I wanted to weigh in specifically on this question, since we moved (not from NYC but from another major city) and ended up buying in Silver Spring. For us, because we already had school-aged kids, we wanted someplace that was walkable to public transportation and amenities but where we could feel comfortable with the school situation even if we didn't get one of the handful of spots that came open at that grade.

Now, PP might have a different financial situation coming from NYC. We had a budget of about $650K to spend on a house and that just wasn't getting us anything in the District. I'm really happy with where we landed, though. Our local public is extremely diverse and our kids are doing well, we are walkable to Metro and shops/schools/restaurants, and we have about 1400 square feet plus a small yard, which feels just right for our family. For us, Silver Spring gave us the diversity that we wanted as a family with kids of different backgrounds, as well as letting us live with a minimal dependence on our car.

That was out budget and out conclusion as well. I would have happily moved to shaw.... Maybe, if we could have afforded anything in shaw besides a bad condo flip. But I also, in the years we've spent renting in dc have made a study of dc neighborhoods. I drive through them. I ask questions. I look at very simple metrics, like, how many kids are walking around by themselves after school? How many places are there for them to go? Where can our children find a balance of a safe, walkable neighborhood, good schools, and not be living in such an umc bubble that no one actually does walk?

Silver spring and takoma park are the only places I see it. I don't see it in shaw. I don't even see it in tenleytown. I see glimpses in capitol hill, but we can't afford that. I looked in SW and it was not there. I looked in brookland, and it was too fragmented. I looked in Shepherd Park and found, aside from walking to soccer practice, nothing much at all. I looked in Bethesda proper and realized that living in a condo in a neighborhood that obsessed with class and status would suck for us all.

This isn't about being a New York snob. This is about being a realist. I wish Dc was different. There are neighborhoods that would be great for kids: mount pleasant, Georgetown, Columbia heights, Chinatown. But they are absurdly expensive and there are no children. I'm not even touching the quality of the schools--just the simple fact that all children in them are chaperoned and sheltered and raised under glass.

[Anonymous]

And I'm not wishing for something I can't afford. Brightwood and Michigan Park, Woodridge... Also all great for kids. Made for kids. But driving through them, I don't see the kids. The kids are all shuttled between events. The kids are all younger and in after school programs. The kids aren't even at the rec centers, even though they are wonderful. I don't know where they are.

My kids are lonely, living in the District. It's been years and they still talk about how nice it used to be, when we saw our neighbors, when they ran down the street and played with their friends. When our neighborhood had ice cream trucks, corner stores, civilization.

Vast swathes of dc are more suburban than the burbs.

[Anonymous]

We live in N. Petworth and kids are out everywhere! We love that about our neighborhood. Ages range from toddlers to high schoolers, they are fun and friendly and we know so many by name. They stop to chat with us any time we are outside. We can walk to Upshur in 15 min, circle parks in 5, and two metro's in 20. And freakin ice cream trucks on the daily, But long term...the schools are the problem....we recognize we may need to move as we cant afford/dont want private but value education enough to not be okay with our local options. If we leave it will be so hard, as we love out neighborhood and feel its the perfect mix of residential and urban.

[Anonymous]

I live in Brookland, pp. My kids are out riding their scooters after school. The only time they see other kids is when we invite friends from school over after school for playdates. It is hard and they feel lonely.

I sent my son to pre-K even though I'm a SAHM because whenever we would go play at the park during the day there were rarely other children his age. At library storytime it was all daycare kids. Not being critical -- just found the only way to give him time with other kids was to put him in school.

[Anonymous]

I live in Adams Morgan. Our neighborhood is full of kids. Yeah, my kid is in aftercare, because I work and he is 6. On the weekends, we are out and about everywhere, and the playgrounds are bursting at the seams. Kids are also pretty thick on the ground in the artisanal coffee places, much to the consternation of the hipsters. The barristas don't mind, because the well established professional parents tip better than the hipsters.

We love our local school so far. Will we be there next year? Yes. Will we be there for 5th grade? Maybe. But yes, 650K will get you a reasonably nice condo, but still a condo. I live in one, and it's fine, but I get that it isn't for everyone.

[Anonymous]

What I saw of housing stock in Petworth was severely overpriced and badly flipped. There's one block of semi-hipster retail, and some chain stores near the metro. It may be better than it looks, but I found nothing to recommend the area.

No new Yorker should have an issue with a condo in Adams Morgan; but there again, finding one is not always so simple. In our original search, all the dire warnings I heard here about Marie Reese and Cooke put me off the schools. Ironically, after that, we lotteried one kid into sww@fs.

It's easy to look at the road not taken and wonder; but the truth is, there aren't a lot of decently paved roads.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm AA and left for the burbs because I sought more diversity for my children. DC is pretty segregated along race and class.

I am considering a move to the DC area from Brooklyn and am also concerned about the lack of diversity in many of the neighborhoods I have looked at in the District. Several people have told me I may find more diversity in certain suburbs - Silver Springs and Takoma Park? Are there others I should consider? I was very reluctant to consider suburban living because I love urban life. But the things I value about urban life - walkability to local businesses/parks/playgrounds, diversity (racial/religious/socio-economic/family makeup), and community activism/involvement - I am realizing are not a guarantee in the District. If these things are priorities for me - along with schools and, let's be honest, getting more house for the money - which suburbs should I consider?

NP, NYC transplant here. We are from Manhattan so not exactly the same as Brooklyn but struggled at first with the move for the same reasons you've mentioned. I found everything west of the park to be painfully suburban. We ended up in what they're calling North Shaw now (I know, I know, but I'm lazy and it's an easy description) and it's not so bad. It's not NYC, but it's pretty lively, good restaurants, walkable (we don't own a car) and relatively diverse. Having just looked around, the cost per square foot is very high here relative to other neighborhoods but it probably won't phase you if you're coming from New York. Everything still feels like a deal here. Our DCPS schools, especially at the upper levels, are stiff iffy though.

I wanted to weigh in specifically on this question, since we moved (not from NYC but from another major city) and ended up buying in Silver Spring. For us, because we already had school-aged kids, we wanted someplace that was walkable to public transportation and amenities but where we could feel comfortable with the school situation even if we didn't get one of the handful of spots that came open at that grade.

Now, PP might have a different financial situation coming from NYC. We had a budget of about $650K to spend on a house and that just wasn't getting us anything in the District. I'm really happy with where we landed, though. Our local public is extremely diverse and our kids are doing well, we are walkable to Metro and shops/schools/restaurants, and we have about 1400 square feet plus a small yard, which feels just right for our family. For us, Silver Spring gave us the diversity that we wanted as a family with kids of different backgrounds, as well as letting us live with a minimal dependence on our car.

That was out budget and out conclusion as well. I would have happily moved to shaw.... Maybe, if we could have afforded anything in shaw besides a bad condo flip. But I also, in the years we've spent renting in dc have made a study of dc neighborhoods. I drive through them. I ask questions. I look at very simple metrics, like, how many kids are walking around by themselves after school? How many places are there for them to go? Where can our children find a balance of a safe, walkable neighborhood, good schools, and not be living in such an umc bubble that no one actually does walk?

Silver spring and takoma park are the only places I see it. I don't see it in shaw. I don't even see it in tenleytown. I see glimpses in capitol hill, but we can't afford that. I looked in SW and it was not there. I looked in brookland, and it was too fragmented. I looked in Shepherd Park and found, aside from walking to soccer practice, nothing much at all. I looked in Bethesda proper and realized that living in a condo in a neighborhood that obsessed with class and status would suck for us all.

This isn't about being a New York snob. This is about being a realist. I wish Dc was different. There are neighborhoods that would be great for kids: mount pleasant, Georgetown, Columbia heights, Chinatown. But they are absurdly expensive and there are no children. I'm not even touching the quality of the schools--just the simple fact that all children in them are chaperoned and sheltered and raised under glass.

I agree with much of what was said above in terms of affordability and neighborhoods. But you are wrong that there are no kids in Mt Pleasant - there are tons of kids in the neighborhood and I see older kids walking around my street alone all the time! and because the homes are bigger and the neighborhood zones to Deal, there are lots of older kids - not just the stroller set. That said, Mt Pleasant is sadly out of reach for someone looking for a house for $650K. We were lucky to have bought in 15 years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our children have now attended two well-regarded DC schools: one a dcps and one a charter.

We are heading to dtss and are THRILLED about it. Yes, the class sizes will be larger. But so will the opportunities. And it is a functional city. I'm telling you, as another Clinton Hill expat, DC is not the same thing. Not any part of it. Not even close.

One of the most annoying tropes on DCUM is the "nothing in DC can compare to NYC so therefore we are moving to the suburbs" trope.

My theory is that some (not all) people who live in NYC end up having a lot of their identity tied up in it, and when they leave New York they experience an identity dislocation, plus they don't have the money for the best DC neighborhoods, so they reach for the trope.

DC is definitely not NYC, but I don't understand that as an excuse for moving to the burbs. That's like the Bernie Bros voting Trump because they're mad Hillary isn't Bernie.

Ha, good one! Agree!

Please the utter lack of decent public schools, playgrounds in any neighborhood other than NW, and literally no stores for children stuff it makes sense to move to suburbs if you have a family. NYC is completely different landscape, and DC proper lacks much of what functions in a city.

Not true at all.

Where can I buy a stroller and a kids book in DC? target in Columbia heights, Costco, and $$$$ boutiques in Georgetown.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our children have now attended two well-regarded DC schools: one a dcps and one a charter.

We are heading to dtss and are THRILLED about it. Yes, the class sizes will be larger. But so will the opportunities. And it is a functional city. I'm telling you, as another Clinton Hill expat, DC is not the same thing. Not any part of it. Not even close.

One of the most annoying tropes on DCUM is the "nothing in DC can compare to NYC so therefore we are moving to the suburbs" trope.

My theory is that some (not all) people who live in NYC end up having a lot of their identity tied up in it, and when they leave New York they experience an identity dislocation, plus they don't have the money for the best DC neighborhoods, so they reach for the trope.

DC is definitely not NYC, but I don't understand that as an excuse for moving to the burbs. That's like the Bernie Bros voting Trump because they're mad Hillary isn't Bernie.

Ha, good one! Agree!

Please the utter lack of decent public schools, playgrounds in any neighborhood other than NW, and literally no stores for children stuff it makes sense to move to suburbs if you have a family. NYC is completely different landscape, and DC proper lacks much of what functions in a city.

Not true at all.

Where can I buy a stroller and a kids book in DC? target in Columbia heights, Costco, and $$$$ boutiques in Georgetown.

How often do you need to buy strollers? Order books online.

Same problem in Ny. I don't remember living anywhere near a big box store for strollers or a bookstore.

[Anonymous]

It always comes down to racism. That's why people move. Racism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It always comes down to racism. That's why people move. Racism.

Good joke, I get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our children have now attended two well-regarded DC schools: one a dcps and one a charter.

We are heading to dtss and are THRILLED about it. Yes, the class sizes will be larger. But so will the opportunities. And it is a functional city. I'm telling you, as another Clinton Hill expat, DC is not the same thing. Not any part of it. Not even close.

One of the most annoying tropes on DCUM is the "nothing in DC can compare to NYC so therefore we are moving to the suburbs" trope.

My theory is that some (not all) people who live in NYC end up having a lot of their identity tied up in it, and when they leave New York they experience an identity dislocation, plus they don't have the money for the best DC neighborhoods, so they reach for the trope.

DC is definitely not NYC, but I don't understand that as an excuse for moving to the burbs. That's like the Bernie Bros voting Trump because they're mad Hillary isn't Bernie.

Ha, good one! Agree!

Please the utter lack of decent public schools, playgrounds in any neighborhood other than NW, and literally no stores for children stuff it makes sense to move to suburbs if you have a family. NYC is completely different landscape, and DC proper lacks much of what functions in a city.

Not true at all.

Where can I buy a stroller and a kids book in DC? target in Columbia heights, Costco, and $$$$ boutiques in Georgetown.

For kids' (and adult) books I go to Politics & Prose on Conn., Kramer Books in DuPont Circle, and sometimes Busboys & Poets in Takoma has nice selections too. I bought a stroller when living in another city a few years ago so not sure about where to buy that sort of stuff here.

[Anonymous]

The craigslist stroller marker is hot and heavy.

Plenty of fine booksellers in the city.

You can be too rich to be bothered with Amazon Prime or not able to afford it, but for everyone else it is a game changer. I have an 8-year split in my kids ages. Prime and smart phones existed when the younger child was born but I was a late adapter and the difference has been very noticeable.

[Anonymous]

You can buy kid books at the Barnes and Noble in Brookland / Edgewood...you can go to story time there. Or you can to borrow books and do story time at the awesome new Woodridge library.

Bought our stroller off Craigslist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our children have now attended two well-regarded DC schools: one a dcps and one a charter.

We are heading to dtss and are THRILLED about it. Yes, the class sizes will be larger. But so will the opportunities. And it is a functional city. I'm telling you, as another Clinton Hill expat, DC is not the same thing. Not any part of it. Not even close.

One of the most annoying tropes on DCUM is the "nothing in DC can compare to NYC so therefore we are moving to the suburbs" trope.

My theory is that some (not all) people who live in NYC end up having a lot of their identity tied up in it, and when they leave New York they experience an identity dislocation, plus they don't have the money for the best DC neighborhoods, so they reach for the trope.

DC is definitely not NYC, but I don't understand that as an excuse for moving to the burbs. That's like the Bernie Bros voting Trump because they're mad Hillary isn't Bernie.

Ha, good one! Agree!

Please the utter lack of decent public schools, playgrounds in any neighborhood other than NW, and literally no stores for children stuff it makes sense to move to suburbs if you have a family. NYC is completely different landscape, and DC proper lacks much of what functions in a city.

Not true at all.

Where can I buy a stroller and a kids book in DC? target in Columbia heights, Costco, and $$$$ boutiques in Georgetown.

How often do you need to buy strollers? Order books online.

Same problem in Ny. I don't remember living anywhere near a big box store for strollers or a bookstore.

Albee's. They also delivered. And Greenlight, B&N union square, park slope, all the libraries. Kids are on the playgrounds in NYC. They're not here. It's noticeable.