Wife dies and husband adopts their 1 year old out to the aunt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For all you adoptive parents. Yes you are real parents and love your children and your children still love you. I'm sure you gave them
Their bio parents most likely had great reasons for not parenting.

However, none of that changes that your child may still feel abandoned or some kind of loss related to their bio parents.
This is a very real thing.

This person posts the same sh*t on every thread that mentions adoption. This is a an angry poster who watches too much TV.

I am adopted and there is no "loss." No pop-a-doodle psychology needed.

My niece and nephew were adopted and feel the same way. No one is against adoption, not what has been said. Just men who would abandon a toddler who has already bonded with them. Good thing the kid wasn't a teen... Not the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

Exactly. Not relatable to this scenario.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op I used to work with a woman who placed her daughter for adoption at 8 months. She was a single mom and couldn't handle the responsibility. Nor did she want to.

I was shocked. However, mom had very little emotional attachment. The little girl was hopefully raised in a better situation.

8-month-olds are still practically potatoes. I wouldn't expect a strong emotional attachment yet.

Wtf are you talking about? My kid was attached to his parents at three-ish months for sure. He knew who his parents were and would squawk if someone else tried to hold him for too long.

Mine did too, and I adopted him at three months.n If anyone other than me tried to hold him, he cried.
Finally a month later, my mom could home her grandson til the cows came home. But it did take a month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op I used to work with a woman who placed her daughter for adoption at 8 months. She was a single mom and couldn't handle the responsibility. Nor did she want to.

I was shocked. However, mom had very little emotional attachment. The little girl was hopefully raised in a better situation.

8-month-olds are still practically potatoes. I wouldn't expect a strong emotional attachment yet.

Wtf are you talking about? My kid was attached to his parents at three-ish months for sure. He knew who his parents were and would squawk if someone else tried to hold him for too long.

Mine did too, and I adopted him at three months.n If anyone other than me tried to hold him, he cried.
Finally a month later, my mom could home her grandson til the cows came home. But it did take a month.

Of course, anyone with kids knows this. This child was closer to 2 by the time she was adopted. Very traumatic no doubt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

So he should have kept the child to about judgment from old white ladies instead of finding a better home for her? That doesn't help anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

Sure, OP. Go back to your anti-choice protest.

Not OP. I have no idea why you’re conflating being anti-choice with being anti-abandoning your child after your wife dies. This couple made THE CHOICE to bring a child into the world. He should step up and care for his child. Honestly, people will forgive men such bad behavior.

That's *exactly* the argument the anti-choice people try to make. Exactly.

No, the anti-choice people don’t want you to have a choice. I’m saying, you affirmatively made a choice to bring this child into the world, it exists, and now you need to be responsible for that choice. Very different from making a choice before a child exists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op I used to work with a woman who placed her daughter for adoption at 8 months. She was a single mom and couldn't handle the responsibility. Nor did she want to.

I was shocked. However, mom had very little emotional attachment. The little girl was hopefully raised in a better situation.

8-month-olds are still practically potatoes. I wouldn't expect a strong emotional attachment yet.

Wtf are you talking about? My kid was attached to his parents at three-ish months for sure. He knew who his parents were and would squawk if someone else tried to hold him for too long.

Mine did too, and I adopted him at three months.n If anyone other than me tried to hold him, he cried.
Finally a month later, my mom could home her grandson til the cows came home. But it did take a month.

Of course, anyone with kids knows this. This child was closer to 2 by the time she was adopted. Very traumatic no doubt.

Not normal. Look at any daycare for many, many counterexamples.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

So he should have kept the child to about judgment from old white ladies instead of finding a better home for her? That doesn't help anyone.

No, he did what is right for the child but he is still a piece of shit. His child won’t talk to him because he abandoned her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

Sure, OP. Go back to your anti-choice protest.

Not OP. I have no idea why you’re conflating being anti-choice with being anti-abandoning your child after your wife dies. This couple made THE CHOICE to bring a child into the world. He should step up and care for his child. Honestly, people will forgive men such bad behavior.

That's *exactly* the argument the anti-choice people try to make. Exactly.

No, the anti-choice people don’t want you to have a choice. I’m saying, you affirmatively made a choice to bring this child into the world, it exists, and now you need to be responsible for that choice. Very different from making a choice before a child exists.

And they would say that you made that choice when you conceived the child, so you should be responsible for it. Apparently whether you're going to be a good parent or not.

Just like you're saying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

So he should have kept the child to about judgment from old white ladies instead of finding a better home for her? That doesn't help anyone.

No, he did what is right for the child but he is still a piece of shit. His child won’t talk to him because he abandoned her.

It certainly doesn't sound like you're close friends with him, so it's safe to say you don't know the full story there. You're just doubling down after so many posters have told you that you're a horrible person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

So he should have kept the child to about judgment from old white ladies instead of finding a better home for her? That doesn't help anyone.

Take your racist comments somewhere else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

Sure, OP. Go back to your anti-choice protest.

Not OP. I have no idea why you’re conflating being anti-choice with being anti-abandoning your child after your wife dies. This couple made THE CHOICE to bring a child into the world. He should step up and care for his child. Honestly, people will forgive men such bad behavior.

That's *exactly* the argument the anti-choice people try to make. Exactly.

No, the anti-choice people don’t want you to have a choice. I’m saying, you affirmatively made a choice to bring this child into the world, it exists, and now you need to be responsible for that choice. Very different from making a choice before a child exists.

And they would say that you made that choice when you conceived the child, so you should be responsible for it. Apparently whether you're going to be a good parent or not.

Just like you're saying.

Just because they're using the same argument at a different point in time doesn't mean I agree with them or they with me. Yes, after you have a child, you've made your decision. The child is here. At this point it's no longer solely about you. Is your argument that one must never take accountability for a decision to bring a child into the world? Can one always cast off the child, at any age, any time, for any reason?

If so, PIECE OF SHIT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

No, he's not. He did the right thing. The child has a new mom who loves her. I applaud him. All children should be raised by people who want them. The horror stories I hear from my sister who is a family therapist would keep you up at night.

I think you missed the point. He’s a piece of shit because he didn’t want his child.

So he should have kept the child to about judgment from old white ladies instead of finding a better home for her? That doesn't help anyone.

No, he did what is right for the child but he is still a piece of shit. His child won’t talk to him because he abandoned her.

It certainly doesn't sound like you're close friends with him, so it's safe to say you don't know the full story there. You're just doubling down after so many posters have told you that you're a horrible person.

I'm not the OP, you moron. There are probably half a dozen people at least weighing in here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is the horrible one in this situation. Yes, it's great that the child is growing up with someone who loves and cares for her. But it's still astonishing to hear that a fully capable human just abandoned his child. People keep bringing up situations of drug abuse, jail, mental health issues, apparently none of which apply here. He just... didnt want his child. That's definitely judgement worthy. I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I'm glad he had a vasectomy and will not be abandoning any more children.

People are giving all kinds of examples that do not apply to this. He wasn't a teen with an unwanted pregnancy.

He was a man who decided to have a child with his wife. After a year she was killed in a car crash. He could have easily asked that aunt, anmd other family to help him. Instead, he wanted zero ties, legal, financial etc. Thus adopted her out. You are right, as a society we should look down on any parent who behaves that way.

Instead you can see that most people are looking down on you.

Do better.

NP. No way. This man is a piece of shit.

Sure, OP. Go back to your anti-choice protest.

Not OP. I have no idea why you’re conflating being anti-choice with being anti-abandoning your child after your wife dies. This couple made THE CHOICE to bring a child into the world. He should step up and care for his child. Honestly, people will forgive men such bad behavior.

That's *exactly* the argument the anti-choice people try to make. Exactly.

No, the anti-choice people don’t want you to have a choice. I’m saying, you affirmatively made a choice to bring this child into the world, it exists, and now you need to be responsible for that choice. Very different from making a choice before a child exists.

In reality your child can be an inconvenience at any time in their life. It's bad enough the horrible people that make the choice to get a pet only to return it to a shelter. This isn't any different, they no longer want the trouble though they "made that choice" to have the child.