The divide gets bigger as you get older...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this is true. Early start is key. Focus on careers that help you establish yourself and are the best /most profitable match for your skill set.

We both went to a top 15 school - met after college through friends - big law/finance dual income in 20s and 30s. By mid 40s, we are senior in our respective careers with hhi of $4-7m per year.
Money is a non issue in our life.
Time is a more valuable commodity.

This is so much money, but it doesn’t set off any jealousy in me at all. We earn 250k, split right down the middle between DH and myself, and we have ample time. With our kids, with each other, with friends, with our aging parents. We own our house, have short commutes, will be able to retire and never live in poverty. Why do people contort their lives for vast amounts of money and then sacrifice the things that make life good?

DP. Because they are likely more professionally ambitious than you.. It’s like the kid that wanted an A in every class (and put in the time to do it) vs the kid who was fine with a B (and more free time). Different strokes for different folks.

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This would follow if ambition and professional achievement were tied directly to financial gain. But the most respected, successful journalists, educators, scientists will not be earning as much as the middle band of people in finance or corporate law or whatever. You can take your career very seriously and never see that reflected in your income. Unless by “professionally ambitious” you mean “motivated by money.”

exactly!!!

I have a cousin who went to elite school, phd, academically and professionally published civil engineer and she only has an income of 250k. She is a professor.

her husband is a software engineer. Yes they made mid six figures but they will never make over 1 million a year.

Ummm she is making really good money

Most professors make less than $100k.

Not in law or STEM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this is true. Early start is key. Focus on careers that help you establish yourself and are the best /most profitable match for your skill set.

We both went to a top 15 school - met after college through friends - big law/finance dual income in 20s and 30s. By mid 40s, we are senior in our respective careers with hhi of $4-7m per year.
Money is a non issue in our life.
Time is a more valuable commodity.

This is so much money, but it doesn’t set off any jealousy in me at all. We earn 250k, split right down the middle between DH and myself, and we have ample time. With our kids, with each other, with friends, with our aging parents. We own our house, have short commutes, will be able to retire and never live in poverty. Why do people contort their lives for vast amounts of money and then sacrifice the things that make life good?

DP. Because they are likely more professionally ambitious than you.. It’s like the kid that wanted an A in every class (and put in the time to do it) vs the kid who was fine with a B (and more free time). Different strokes for different folks.

.
This would follow if ambition and professional achievement were tied directly to financial gain. But the most respected, successful journalists, educators, scientists will not be earning as much as the middle band of people in finance or corporate law or whatever. You can take your career very seriously and never see that reflected in your income. Unless by “professionally ambitious” you mean “motivated by money.”

exactly!!!

I have a cousin who went to elite school, phd, academically and professionally published civil engineer and she only has an income of 250k. She is a professor.

her husband is a software engineer. Yes they made mid six figures but they will never make over 1 million a year.

Ummm she is making really good money

Most professors make less than $100k.

Not in law or STEM.

Which is most professors. And many science professors make below 100k--just not ones where there is strong industry competition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this is true. Early start is key. Focus on careers that help you establish yourself and are the best /most profitable match for your skill set.

We both went to a top 15 school - met after college through friends - big law/finance dual income in 20s and 30s. By mid 40s, we are senior in our respective careers with hhi of $4-7m per year.
Money is a non issue in our life.
Time is a more valuable commodity.

This is so much money, but it doesn’t set off any jealousy in me at all. We earn 250k, split right down the middle between DH and myself, and we have ample time. With our kids, with each other, with friends, with our aging parents. We own our house, have short commutes, will be able to retire and never live in poverty. Why do people contort their lives for vast amounts of money and then sacrifice the things that make life good?

DP. Because they are likely more professionally ambitious than you.. It’s like the kid that wanted an A in every class (and put in the time to do it) vs the kid who was fine with a B (and more free time). Different strokes for different folks.

.
This would follow if ambition and professional achievement were tied directly to financial gain. But the most respected, successful journalists, educators, scientists will not be earning as much as the middle band of people in finance or corporate law or whatever. You can take your career very seriously and never see that reflected in your income. Unless by “professionally ambitious” you mean “motivated by money.”

exactly!!!

I have a cousin who went to elite school, phd, academically and professionally published civil engineer and she only has an income of 250k. She is a professor.

her husband is a software engineer. Yes they made mid six figures but they will never make over 1 million a year.

Ummm she is making really good money

Most professors make less than $100k.

Not in law or STEM.

Well, she is an utter failure then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And for women, very much who you marry. Would never have married someone the people my friends did thinking it sound too matter at the time but it really does.

Huh?

If you marry who friends say throw away future earnings against the wall kids stick onto wall, spend lots or money or no time either way most people are happy.

I think this must be a contest to see how incomprensible one can make a sentence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And for women, very much who you marry. Would never have married someone the people my friends did thinking it sound too matter at the time but it really does.

Huh?

If you marry who friends say throw away future earnings against the wall kids stick onto wall, spend lots or money or no time either way most people are happy.

I think this must be a contest to see how incomprensible one can make a sentence.

I think it says if you marry friends, most people are happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As long as you're happy and have a fulfilling career, so what?

That's exactly what I thought at 25, but I didn't realize how much of a difference income makes on every area of your life. Where you can live, where your kids go to school, when or if you can ever retire, if you can travel, if you can afford certain types of healthcare, how you live, the security you feel, the security you can offer your family (parents or children), etc.

It never ends.

So true. When you're on the outside looking in it matters a lot. I started out in nonprofits after college barely making $30K and now, one grad degree and nearly 12 years later, I work in tech and make $250K...My husband makes $350K and he also started out making around $30K. It matters.

What do you do in tech?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

When I hear this I think people just want to hire people they can boss around more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it simply becomes harder to HIDE that you haven’t saved or accumulated any money.

The first big shift is couples buying their first home. Then it’s upgrading to a nicer home. Later, it’s when you can retire.

I have a number of friends who continue to rent a fancy lifestyle. They may have high earnings but can’t save any or much. Still don’t own a home. We make less but bought a while ago and have since upgraded. It is becoming more and move obvious that certain couples haven’t saved any money especially if they can’t even buy a house or apartment.

Totally, totally this. Not that there aren't excellent reasons to rent a home, especially with it being such a seller's market right now. But if you didn't catch on to the concept of having *some* kind of nest egg, be it a house or a 401K or whatever, the gap will grow and grow. Decisions in your 20s and early 30s compound, the bill comes due and it's very hard to catch up.

All of this … our friends don’t understand why (now) we have a fancy house in a fancy neighborhood and are ok with kids and vacations (not big law level just comfortable)- we just we had cheap apartments and saved then bought early in an up and coming neighborhood building equity. Able to trade up and out while they spent way too much on luxury apartments for too long in hot areas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

That and caltech grads - really the only private school folks that are reliably good. The problem is LAC/Ivies just have too many legacies/athletes/etc who just aren't qualified. State school honors kids are uniformly good. I mean you can throw away all the Ivy grads who have a private high school on their resume, but there are enough rich kids who went to public high school that mess it up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

That’s ok. Plenty of elite firms that will favor ivy grads first rather than your podunk old boy’s network company.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

That and caltech grads - really the only private school folks that are reliably good. The problem is LAC/Ivies just have too many legacies/athletes/etc who just aren't qualified. State school honors kids are uniformly good. I mean you can throw away all the Ivy grads who have a private high school on their resume, but there are enough rich kids who went to public high school that mess it up.

You should understand that state school honors programs are all UMC & rich kids, whereas there are low-income kids graduating from Ivies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

When I hear this I think people just want to hire people they can boss around more.

No, not at all. In fact we want someone with a backbone. I will hire Ivy kids if I see they have middle or lower class background, or ROTC or food service jobs or agricultural work. Real world experience. I'm dating myself but a kid came in from Harvard with Subway Certified Sandwich Artist on his resume and it really did make a difference to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

When I hear this I think people just want to hire people they can boss around more.

No, not at all. In fact we want someone with a backbone. I will hire Ivy kids if I see they have middle or lower class background, or ROTC or food service jobs or agricultural work. Real world experience. I'm dating myself but a kid came in from Harvard with Subway Certified Sandwich Artist on his resume and it really did make a difference to me.

I know that's your schtick and the way you think you're doing it. But it's biased and as a psychologist I think there's something more going on. Just my 2c.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject Ivy leaguers from jobs all day. My favorite hires are usually state school honors program kids. Bright, realistic, and hungry!

This is who our hiring panels favor as well. The Ivies are almost disadvantaged at our firm.

That’s ok. Plenty of elite firms that will favor ivy grads first rather than your podunk old boy’s network company.

Omg some of you people…get your self esteem issues fixed, please.