The divide gets bigger as you get older...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In our 20s, my peer group consisted of non-profits, consultants, law school students, first and second-year lawyers, and a few engineers. The differences between us didn't seem huge, we went to bars, lived in apartments and group houses, dated, went on lame vacations with our parents or not at all... you all know that life. Were all basically kind of the same poor"ish". A few of my friends threw down lots of money shopping, or had slightly nicer apartments, but the financial differences between us all seemed minimal.

But I'm 45 now, and the discrepancies between those who chose high-paying careers and those who didn't seem huge. The differences in earnings just compounded over time. If I had been able to fully internalize and visualize the difference between a for-profit and non-profit career.

DC is full of aging do gooders who pursued low paying, but noble sounding degrees. Eventually the bitterness sets in and then they turn sour and are easily triggered. These are most of folks behind the Connecticut Ave bike lane push. They can’t afford homes in upper NW or Montgomery County and their sad revenge is to make everyone else miserable.

[Anonymous]

Is the OP of this thread the same OP as the “can’t get ahead” thread?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A decision to have 0, 1,2, 3, 4 or more kids is a major economical decision and changes your lifestyle drastically.

With 3+ kids it’s harder for a woman to work because of cost of childcare. Kids are expensive. Travel with 3+ kids becomes unaffordable for many people. Saving for college become unaffordable, buying cars for them. Even groceries for a family of five are so much more.

I’m a working woman with 3 kids. I would love to quit because I work an executive job (senior director at a tech company), but I don’t think it would be good for me in the long run. Having two kids was easy and three kids is harder not because I had three kids but because the third is much younger. As a unit of economics, childcare actually is cheaper with three kids if you have a nanny. It becomes expensive when you do preschool etc. But my spouse works and we manage. It’s doable. And we have a decent quality of life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In our 20s, my peer group consisted of non-profits, consultants, law school students, first and second-year lawyers, and a few engineers. The differences between us didn't seem huge, we went to bars, lived in apartments and group houses, dated, went on lame vacations with our parents or not at all... you all know that life. Were all basically kind of the same poor"ish". A few of my friends threw down lots of money shopping, or had slightly nicer apartments, but the financial differences between us all seemed minimal.

But I'm 45 now, and the discrepancies between those who chose high-paying careers and those who didn't seem huge. The differences in earnings just compounded over time. If I had been able to fully internalize and visualize the difference between a for-profit and non-profit career.

DC is full of aging do gooders who pursued low paying, but noble sounding degrees. Eventually the bitterness sets in and then they turn sour and are easily triggered. These are most of folks behind the Connecticut Ave bike lane push. They can’t afford homes in upper NW or Montgomery County and their sad revenge is to make everyone else miserable.

I own a home in CCDC. One of the fancy ones. and I fully support the bike lanes, as do my friends in the neighborhood who also own homes. The people I see against the bike lanes are people who are older and are afraid of having to change their driving and parking habits even though there is tons of off street and side street parking in the neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And yet DCUM denigrates the pre professional schools at Penn Georgetown Northeastern in favor of SLACs. It’s all daisies and unicorns to be so idealist in when you are young, until you are 35 and your peers are making 3-5x more than you do….. this is exactly why I told my DC to pursue CS or Business. Let someone else try to save the world, the trees and the whales. In the real world, living real life, with two kids and a mortgage, It’s about making money.

And yet I'm still advising my kids to look at SLACs. When they save the world, you'll know who to thank.

None of the these people want your kid to “save the world.” The big money is made keeping it just the way it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As long as you're happy and have a fulfilling career, so what?

That's exactly what I thought at 25, but I didn't realize how much of a difference income makes on every area of your life. Where you can live, where your kids go to school, when or if you can ever retire, if you can travel, if you can afford certain types of healthcare, how you live, the security you feel, the security you can offer your family (parents or children), etc.

It never ends.

No necessarily. I live in what others would consider a crappy part of Montgomery county, my kids went to public high school and colleges. I have made 7 figures for the last 8 years. I just like the peer group and lack of pretentiousness/competitiveness. I also am not very make up and fashion conscious so do not fit in Potomac crowd. I do not at all consider my self more enlighten than my income peer group or better than my neighbor/social group. It just is what it is. I’m happy in that environment and each person has the opportunity to choose where they feel most comfortable. Retiring early and looking forward to cooking more than hamburgers and tacos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As long as you're happy and have a fulfilling career, so what?

That's exactly what I thought at 25, but I didn't realize how much of a difference income makes on every area of your life. Where you can live, where your kids go to school, when or if you can ever retire, if you can travel, if you can afford certain types of healthcare, how you live, the security you feel, the security you can offer your family (parents or children), etc.

It never ends.

No necessarily. I live in what others would consider a crappy part of Montgomery county, my kids went to public high school and colleges. I have made 7 figures for the last 8 years. I just like the peer group and lack of pretentiousness/competitiveness. I also am not very make up and fashion conscious so do not fit in Potomac crowd. I do not at all consider my self more enlighten than my income peer group or better than my neighbor/social group. It just is what it is. I’m happy in that environment and each person has the opportunity to choose where they feel most comfortable. Retiring early and looking forward to cooking more than hamburgers and tacos.

As long as you’re happy.

Do you own a business? Curious what you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And for women, very much who you marry. Would never have married someone the people my friends did thinking it sound too matter at the time but it really does.

Huh?

If you marry who friends say throw away future earnings against the wall kids stick onto wall, spend lots or money or no time either way most people are happy.

Milk the cattle for future earning with budget in economics of houehold the couple must work together and maintain harmony as duet is important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And for women, very much who you marry. Would never have married someone the people my friends did thinking it sound too matter at the time but it really does.

Huh?

If you marry who friends say throw away future earnings against the wall kids stick onto wall, spend lots or money or no time either way most people are happy.

Milk the cattle for future earning with budget in economics of houehold the couple must work together and maintain harmony as duet is important.

Are any of the prior posts coherent to anyone else?

[Anonymous]

This thread topic comes up once a year

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As long as you're happy and have a fulfilling career, so what?

That's exactly what I thought at 25, but I didn't realize how much of a difference income makes on every area of your life. Where you can live, where your kids go to school, when or if you can ever retire, if you can travel, if you can afford certain types of healthcare, how you live, the security you feel, the security you can offer your family (parents or children), etc.

It never ends.

No necessarily. I live in what others would consider a crappy part of Montgomery county, my kids went to public high school and colleges. I have made 7 figures for the last 8 years. I just like the peer group and lack of pretentiousness/competitiveness. I also am not very make up and fashion conscious so do not fit in Potomac crowd. I do not at all consider my self more enlighten than my income peer group or better than my neighbor/social group. It just is what it is. I’m happy in that environment and each person has the opportunity to choose where they feel most comfortable. Retiring early and looking forward to cooking more than hamburgers and tacos.

As long as you’re happy.

Do you own a business? Curious what you do?

I was on the Executive team of two different PE portfolio companies. Have made a lot in recap transactions, millions. Really it was mostly just luck —plenty of folks work 60-75 hours a week like me any never got same financial reward but of course lots of folks made much more. But never felt comfortable talking bourbons and golf courses at the networking events. Work was very interesting and I don’t regret it but am happy to jump off even though it would be very easy for me to to get another one of those jobs with a 4 year liquidity timeline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And for women, very much who you marry. Would never have married someone the people my friends did thinking it sound too matter at the time but it really does.

Huh?

If you marry who friends say throw away future earnings against the wall kids stick onto wall, spend lots or money or no time either way most people are happy.

Milk the cattle for future earning with budget in economics of houehold the couple must work together and maintain harmony as duet is important.

Are any of the prior posts coherent to anyone else?

I read them twice. Now my brain hurts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so much money, but it doesn’t set off any jealousy in me at all. We earn 250k, split right down the middle between DH and myself, and we have ample time. With our kids, with each other, with friends, with our aging parents. We own our house, have short commutes, will be able to retire and never live in poverty. Why do people contort their lives for vast amounts of money and then sacrifice the things that make life good?

Because you don’t always have to contort yourself. My DH works in tech. 100% remote since before the pandemic. Typically works about 4-5 hours a day and makes 750k. Add in a couple big stock grants, which is how we paid off debt and built wealth.

I don’t work. We have a ton of free time. I’d wager much more so than people like you.

What a snobby response.

Not the PP but I too think it is ridiculous to assume high earners don’t care about their families or work/life balance. Thinking that everyone who makes a lot of money must be miserable and working 24/7 is just not true. It’s a cope.

I’m not the PP and I think the PP sounds like a shallow loser.

However we are a 2 income household and my DH works in IT sales and makes anywhere from 200k-900k. He absolutely loves his job. He loves the hunt, he loves competition (former college athlete so it’s in his blood). He’s not working 24x7 at all. I too work from home and how much screwing around he does during the day sometimes annoys me because my job is so much busier and I often make well under half of what he makes. Being a sports and competition junkie he spends so much time with our kids coaching their sports and is even the commissioner for our local rec team and is also a ref. He the one who takes our kids skiing and and is the chauffeur for all their sports practices and crazy games all over the place. I’d say he puts in 35hrs a week and anything beyond that is done via his two thumbs.

But when it comes down to it he really does love his job and I think he’s very lucky to get paid so well to do it.

[Anonymous]

Just be happy with what you have. There are people in this world who don’t even have a pot to piss in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In our 20s, my peer group consisted of non-profits, consultants, law school students, first and second-year lawyers, and a few engineers. The differences between us didn't seem huge, we went to bars, lived in apartments and group houses, dated, went on lame vacations with our parents or not at all... you all know that life. Were all basically kind of the same poor"ish". A few of my friends threw down lots of money shopping, or had slightly nicer apartments, but the financial differences between us all seemed minimal.

But I'm 45 now, and the discrepancies between those who chose high-paying careers and those who didn't seem huge. The differences in earnings just compounded over time. If I had been able to fully internalize and visualize the difference between a for-profit and non-profit career.

DC is full of aging do gooders who pursued low paying, but noble sounding degrees. Eventually the bitterness sets in and then they turn sour and are easily triggered. These are most of folks behind the Connecticut Ave bike lane push. They can’t afford homes in upper NW or Montgomery County and their sad revenge is to make everyone else miserable.

Unfortunately, some people go into these jobs unaware that these jobs are for the trust fund set. Then they feel duped when they realize that these jobs aren't really meant to support a family, and that their colleagues have $2M homes, nannies, and private schools paid for by someone else.