Neither AC wants kids. I can't help feeling like I failed.

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry, I think I’d be disappointed if my kids don’t have kids so I understand feeling sad that you are missing out on something you had been looking forward to. This doesn’t, though, mean you are a failure or that your kids are. If anything, you can be proud that you raised independent people that are making choices in line with their best interests. At the end of the day, if they are healthy and happy that’s what matters.

I don’t buy the idea that their decisions about this are a reflection of your parenting at all. Plenty of people who are terrible parents have grandkids and plenty of great parents don’t. Choosing to not have kids has become increasingly common, especially among seemingly well adjusted upwardly mobile young adults.

Focusing on enjoying rich relationships with your adult children and, if you want baby/kid time, look into opportunities volunteering with this group.

[Anonymous]

Question to the OP, did they go to private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Question to the OP, did they go to private school?

Serious question for this pp…do private school kids have less children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this at all. I want my kids to be happy. Whether or not they have children is irrelevant.

I have never in my life thought "wow, I can't wait until I have grandchildren."

Me, too! I was reading all the replies thinking, Am I the only one? I really don't think about this ever. I hope and worry for their happiness but never think about whether or not they'll have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would feel sad, too, Op. I think your feelings are normal.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this at all. I want my kids to be happy. Whether or not they have children is irrelevant.

I have never in my life thought "wow, I can't wait until I have grandchildren."

Me, too! I was reading all the replies thinking, Am I the only one? I really don't think about this ever. I hope and worry for their happiness but never think about whether or not they'll have kids.

Congratulations?

[Anonymous]

My kid is only 17 (almost) and I realized I prob won't have grandkids, if any, until I'm mid-late 60's at the earliest. I guess that gives me some motivation to stay active. But would love to have little kids in the house again.

[Anonymous]

I really don't think about this ever.

To this poster, wondering how old are your kids? It wasn't on my mind at all until DD was nearing 30, and after.

[Anonymous]

A completely personal decision yes. Let's just opt out of this thing called humanity and reap the material benefits of it all because it has to end with someone. And the family gatherings get smaller as everyone dies with no one to replace them. No more laughing children. Just some ageing, stressed out careerists that have to pop gummies or wine to cope with their sad existence while looking forward to their next BMW trade in. I'm doing really interesting things at work mom! Doing great things for a world! Ah that's nice sweetie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A completely personal decision yes. Let's just opt out of this thing called humanity and reap the material benefits of it all because it has to end with someone. And the family gatherings get smaller as everyone dies with no one to replace them. No more laughing children. Just some ageing, stressed out careerists that have to pop gummies or wine to cope with their sad existence while looking forward to their next BMW trade in. I'm doing really interesting things at work mom! Doing great things for a world! Ah that's nice sweetie.

This

[Anonymous]

Make the inheritance contingent upon having grandchildren to provide an incentive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question to the OP, did they go to private school?

Serious question for this pp…do private school kids have less children?

Not the PP but I actually think it may. The cost of private schools are so prohibitive now that if someone is not making good income, it may be a deterrent for some people to not be able to provide for their kids what they experienced themselves. Especially if they actually enjoyed the private school experience and have very little personal experience with public schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A completely personal decision yes. Let's just opt out of this thing called humanity and reap the material benefits of it all because it has to end with someone. And the family gatherings get smaller as everyone dies with no one to replace them. No more laughing children. Just some ageing, stressed out careerists that have to pop gummies or wine to cope with their sad existence while looking forward to their next BMW trade in. I'm doing really interesting things at work mom! Doing great things for a world! Ah that's nice sweetie.

You delivered that cold, but 100% accurate of the reality despite the Ah Qs on here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make the inheritance contingent upon having grandchildren to provide an incentive.

Yeah, that’s gonna work out well

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make the inheritance contingent upon having grandchildren to provide an incentive.

Well this is the most practical advice in 13 pages of opinions.