If you get Starbucks with your kids present, do you always buy Starbucks for your kids?

[Anonymous]

I always ask my son if he wants something. If I don't want to spend the money, I don't go.

My mom did stuff like this when I was a kid and I remember that it made me feel like crap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:If you have food or drink (whatever it is) and your family or guests are there, you should offer to share. This is why I often save my treats to eat after they are asleep. I would just skip SB if my kids are present but I don’t want to buy for them.

Coffee isn’t a treat. It’s for adults like alcohol. I made it abundant clear since my kids were toddlers: no caffeinated drinks until you’re done growing. That’s how I grew up and I don’t see any problem with it. So no, I’m not buying you any sugary garbage just because I’m getting my coffee.

If I'm driving alcohol in front of my kids like a restaurant or winery, they do get to order a nonalcoholic drink, not just drink the free water.

Oops that was supposed to be "drinking alcohol" not driving, ha.

But also wanted to add that the PP is very odd for saying alcohol isn't a treat. Of course it is, for adults. Unless you're an alcoholic.

I don’t believe in the concept of “treats” for adults. I earn my money, I use it in any way I see fit. So no, I don’t think coffee or alcohol is a treat. It’s not something that someone else is bestowing on me for good behavior or a special occasion.

HAHA, ok - then what word would you use for something that you do not need - only want - and get for yourself? Honestly, you're just being an a-hole at this point in time pretending you don't understand the term treat. It means, alcohol and coffee are not needed to live. It's something extra that you provide yourself.

Yes, and it’s my money so I’m entitled to spend it as I wish. My children have no money and are not entitled to anything. I enjoy making them happy but that does not extend to purchasing them an item at Starbucks every time I get something.

😳

Anything?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have food or drink (whatever it is) and your family or guests are there, you should offer to share. This is why I often save my treats to eat after they are asleep. I would just skip SB if my kids are present but I don’t want to buy for them.

Coffee isn’t a treat. It’s for adults like alcohol. I made it abundant clear since my kids were toddlers: no caffeinated drinks until you’re done growing. That’s how I grew up and I don’t see any problem with it. So no, I’m not buying you any sugary garbage just because I’m getting my coffee.

If I'm driving alcohol in front of my kids like a restaurant or winery, they do get to order a nonalcoholic drink, not just drink the free water.

Oops that was supposed to be "drinking alcohol" not driving, ha.

But also wanted to add that the PP is very odd for saying alcohol isn't a treat. Of course it is, for adults. Unless you're an alcoholic.

I don’t believe in the concept of “treats” for adults. I earn my money, I use it in any way I see fit. So no, I don’t think coffee or alcohol is a treat. It’s not something that someone else is bestowing on me for good behavior or a special occasion.

HAHA, ok - then what word would you use for something that you do not need - only want - and get for yourself? Honestly, you're just being an a-hole at this point in time pretending you don't understand the term treat. It means, alcohol and coffee are not needed to live. It's something extra that you provide yourself.

Yes, and it’s my money so I’m entitled to spend it as I wish. My children have no money and are not entitled to anything. I enjoy making them happy but that does not extend to purchasing them an item at Starbucks every time I get something.

Things your kids tell their future therapist.

[Anonymous]

Starbucks drip coffee is very gross. I assume the people who drink this daily have no palate so are probably rude little goblins anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have food or drink (whatever it is) and your family or guests are there, you should offer to share. This is why I often save my treats to eat after they are asleep. I would just skip SB if my kids are present but I don’t want to buy for them.

Coffee isn’t a treat. It’s for adults like alcohol. I made it abundant clear since my kids were toddlers: no caffeinated drinks until you’re done growing. That’s how I grew up and I don’t see any problem with it. So no, I’m not buying you any sugary garbage just because I’m getting my coffee.

If I'm driving alcohol in front of my kids like a restaurant or winery, they do get to order a nonalcoholic drink, not just drink the free water.

Oops that was supposed to be "drinking alcohol" not driving, ha.

But also wanted to add that the PP is very odd for saying alcohol isn't a treat. Of course it is, for adults. Unless you're an alcoholic.

I don’t believe in the concept of “treats” for adults. I earn my money, I use it in any way I see fit. So no, I don’t think coffee or alcohol is a treat. It’s not something that someone else is bestowing on me for good behavior or a special occasion.

HAHA, ok - then what word would you use for something that you do not need - only want - and get for yourself? Honestly, you're just being an a-hole at this point in time pretending you don't understand the term treat. It means, alcohol and coffee are not needed to live. It's something extra that you provide yourself.

Yes, and it’s my money so I’m entitled to spend it as I wish. My children have no money and are not entitled to anything. I enjoy making them happy but that does not extend to purchasing them an item at Starbucks every time I get something.

😳

Anything?

That poster must be a troll. No one hates their kids that much

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have food or drink (whatever it is) and your family or guests are there, you should offer to share. This is why I often save my treats to eat after they are asleep. I would just skip SB if my kids are present but I don’t want to buy for them.

Coffee isn’t a treat. It’s for adults like alcohol. I made it abundant clear since my kids were toddlers: no caffeinated drinks until you’re done growing. That’s how I grew up and I don’t see any problem with it. So no, I’m not buying you any sugary garbage just because I’m getting my coffee.

If I'm driving alcohol in front of my kids like a restaurant or winery, they do get to order a nonalcoholic drink, not just drink the free water.

Oops that was supposed to be "drinking alcohol" not driving, ha.

But also wanted to add that the PP is very odd for saying alcohol isn't a treat. Of course it is, for adults. Unless you're an alcoholic.

I don’t believe in the concept of “treats” for adults. I earn my money, I use it in any way I see fit. So no, I don’t think coffee or alcohol is a treat. It’s not something that someone else is bestowing on me for good behavior or a special occasion.

HAHA, ok - then what word would you use for something that you do not need - only want - and get for yourself? Honestly, you're just being an a-hole at this point in time pretending you don't understand the term treat. It means, alcohol and coffee are not needed to live. It's something extra that you provide yourself.

Yes, and it’s my money so I’m entitled to spend it as I wish. My children have no money and are not entitled to anything. I enjoy making them happy but that does not extend to purchasing them an item at Starbucks every time I get something.

😳

Anything?

That poster must be a troll. No one hates their kids that much

And no adult is so self-satisfied with themselves for earning their own money, which is obviously a thing that adults are supposed to do but kids below a certain age cannot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It wouldn’t occur to me not to get her whatever she wants.

But if she gets something sugary I’ll probably make an oblique but damaging remark about it.

This is the way of my people.

I feel seen. Hello, tribe member.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It wouldn’t occur to me not to get her whatever she wants.

But if she gets something sugary I’ll probably make an oblique but damaging remark about it.

This is the way of my people.

I feel seen. Hello, tribe member.

I need an example

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, and that goes for anywhere we get food or drink. To do otherwise would be rude. But it’s never happened at Starbucks. My teens are not interested in that place.

Me again. Like others have said, we limit sugar and fat. We're not a family who buys a lot of drinks or take-out. So in that context of frugality, it would be rude for me to get something and deny them the same. I get an Earl Grey, they can get tea as well. We've never bought ridiculous oversugared drinks or pastries there, because they're entirely gross.

Children are not second-class citizens in my house, they are responsible, intelligent human beings, and over their course of their lives have not shown themselves to be lazy or entitled. Maybe that's because I both respect them AND have clear behavioral expectations.

Their butter and chocolate croissants are not gross. We have them 3-4x a year

They’re honestly pretty terrible. So many better places to get a croissant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes I do, but sometimes I just want to spend less than $5 & get my coffee. I wouldn't get food with them in the car without offering to get them food, but Starbucks - sometimes I just don't want to spend $20. So I tell them they're free to buy their own if they want Starbucks too. Thoughts?

Mom: Buys overpriced, over-caloried, fancy drink for self.

Kids: Can I have one?

Mom: No, it's too expensive.

Yes, it's weird. If you can afford the one, you can afford another drink or drinks. Sometimes, it's ok to be nice and do things for your kids. Not everything has to be a lesson.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have food or drink (whatever it is) and your family or guests are there, you should offer to share. This is why I often save my treats to eat after they are asleep. I would just skip SB if my kids are present but I don’t want to buy for them.

Coffee isn’t a treat. It’s for adults like alcohol. I made it abundant clear since my kids were toddlers: no caffeinated drinks until you’re done growing. That’s how I grew up and I don’t see any problem with it. So no, I’m not buying you any sugary garbage just because I’m getting my coffee.

If I'm driving alcohol in front of my kids like a restaurant or winery, they do get to order a nonalcoholic drink, not just drink the free water.

Oops that was supposed to be "drinking alcohol" not driving, ha.

But also wanted to add that the PP is very odd for saying alcohol isn't a treat. Of course it is, for adults. Unless you're an alcoholic.

I don’t believe in the concept of “treats” for adults. I earn my money, I use it in any way I see fit. So no, I don’t think coffee or alcohol is a treat. It’s not something that someone else is bestowing on me for good behavior or a special occasion.

HAHA, ok - then what word would you use for something that you do not need - only want - and get for yourself? Honestly, you're just being an a-hole at this point in time pretending you don't understand the term treat. It means, alcohol and coffee are not needed to live. It's something extra that you provide yourself.

Yes, and it’s my money so I’m entitled to spend it as I wish. My children have no money and are not entitled to anything. I enjoy making them happy but that does not extend to purchasing them an item at Starbucks every time I get something.

Things your kids tell their future therapist.

Exactly this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I only get drip or unsweetened iced coffees with milk. I’m happy to order my kids those…but they are disinterested. They prefer $6 iced matchas with oat milk and so forth.

So no, I don’t order them a drink every time I get a coffee.

And they’re ok! Your kids will be ok too! It’s rather alarming to see so many parents willing to buy their children awful beverages just so they don’t feel “sad.”

It seems that the problem for you is the $6 not the ingredients.

Exactly. LOL at the PP who thinks the awful ingredients are ONLY in the drinks their kids want. Hahahahahaaaa

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes I do, but sometimes I just want to spend less than $5 & get my coffee. I wouldn't get food with them in the car without offering to get them food, but Starbucks - sometimes I just don't want to spend $20. So I tell them they're free to buy their own if they want Starbucks too. Thoughts?

Mom: Buys overpriced, over-caloried, fancy drink for self.

Kids: Can I have one?

Mom: No, it's too expensive.

Yes, it's weird. If you can afford the one, you can afford another drink or drinks. Sometimes, it's ok to be nice and do things for your kids. Not everything has to be a lesson.

I think you have the wrong idea. The PP is likely getting a black coffee- which is pretty much the only coffee under $5. No kid wants the black coffee. The want the sugary concoction with whipped cream and drizzle and candy toppings. I don’t get that for myself ever, and I’m not getting it for them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I only get drip or unsweetened iced coffees with milk. I’m happy to order my kids those…but they are disinterested. They prefer $6 iced matchas with oat milk and so forth.

So no, I don’t order them a drink every time I get a coffee.

And they’re ok! Your kids will be ok too! It’s rather alarming to see so many parents willing to buy their children awful beverages just so they don’t feel “sad.”

Agreed. I mean, I very rarely go to starbucks or similar so I've never actually been in this situation. But if I were to be the kind of person who grabbed a black coffee or a tea while out running errands, then no I would not always buy my kids what amounts to a milkshake or super rich hot chocolate. These things are desserts. If they want a small refresher or plain iced tea, I would get them that.

There are lots and lots and lots of times that I grab them fast food and don't partake myself. We don't all need to ingest the same treats every time one person wants one.

But that is you making the choice for yourself. Not making the choice for them.

I don't get people who, from lots of comments on this thread, treat their kids like they are second-class citizens. That's how I grew up and it definitely stung. Especially, since "coffee" is the only part we are seeing here and that it probably extends to other things, as well.

Not getting something for your kid who wants something? Yes, "they'll live." But it's rude, af, and tells them where they stand in your eyes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I would never order food or drink for myself without ordering something for my kids. That's horrifyingly rude.

+100