My sister is having her best friend be called aunt

[Anonymous]

One of my kids’ “aunts” is my BFF’s mom. She just truly loves kids and doesn’t have any grandchildren of her own so she likes to play the role of aunt to my kids. She was like a 2nd mother to me growing up so she really is like a part of my family anyway. Why he so rigid about this? I get that in your culture no one is called aunt except actual related aunts. However, when it comes to raising kids, truly the more people those kids have in their lives as positive influences and closely bonded relationships, the better. Having an extra “aunt” doesn’t make a kid have a less close relationship w blood related aunts. It just makes the kid luckier to have more close familial type relationships and role models in their lives.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I'm going to speak from the perspective of a very close best friend of someone that I have been friends with for 30+ years. My friend does have one sister and the sister and I are close as well just from me being friends with her sister for so long.

I would be hurt if my best friend stopped referring to me as aunt to her child because her sister didn't like it. It would show her sister's feelings trumped mine. Now if my friend didn't want to call me aunt I wouldn't be the least but offended or bothered but if she stopped it on account of someone else's feelings that wasn't her or her husband (the father) I would be hurt that the other person's feelings mattered over how close she saw our friendship.

I think after so long friends start to fall more into the family category.

Yeah some people on here are acting like the OP's sister met these people a day ago and are giving them the aunt title or every acquaintance she meets in the grocery store she has her kids call them aunt

No, you’re the one who conjured up this imaginary thought.

You probably didn't read all the responses but there were some people actually agreeing with the OP's thoughts and saying it's normal to be bothered by this hence which is why I said those people are acting like she is going around town calling every Tom, Suzy, and Jane aunt or uncle. They have been best friends for almost a lifetime

Is the best friend still an aunt if they have a falling out? How does that work?

What if OP’s sister gets tired of her controlling personality and cuts her off? Is she still an aunt if she doesn’t have a relationship with sister and niece? How does that work?

Do you not know what an Aunt is?

An aunt certainly doesn’t have to be a blood relation. The relationship is at least as important as the blood ties.

You are right that there is an informal defintion of "aunt" that means an adult friend of the family who a child refers to as "aunt'.

I believe there is also an informal definition of "uncle" that means a random guy who visits mommy only at night who a child might run into while using the bathroom or at breakfast.

DP. You were not raised well. There is nothing about OP's friendship that has anything to do with sex, and you are bringing in creepiness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There may be some legal implications to the name. My brothers former girlfriends kid called my brother Dad when they were a little kid. After he died, the adult kid filed a claim on his estate and got a big chunk of his money.

Not just because he called him Dad. Don’t be dense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There may be some legal implications to the name. My brothers former girlfriends kid called my brother Dad when they were a little kid. After he died, the adult kid filed a claim on his estate and got a big chunk of his money.

Not just because he called him Dad. Don’t be dense.

You should never let your kid call someone Dad or Mom when they are not biological or legally related. Breakups happen.

Likewise if your BFF auntie and you fall out, your kid loses an aunt. Think about how many friends you don't have around anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There may be some legal implications to the name. My brothers former girlfriends kid called my brother Dad when they were a little kid. After he died, the adult kid filed a claim on his estate and got a big chunk of his money.

Not just because he called him Dad. Don’t be dense.

You should never let your kid call someone Dad or Mom when they are not biological or legally related. Breakups happen.

Likewise if your BFF auntie and you fall out, your kid loses an aunt. Think about how many friends you don't have around anymore.
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Ehh I don't think someone you been friends with practically your whole life is going anywhere anytime soon and even if they do fall out with a friendship that lasted that long they are most likely going to work it out and make up. People get estranged and have falling out from siblings should they not be called aunt or uncle?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There may be some legal implications to the name. My brothers former girlfriends kid called my brother Dad when they were a little kid. After he died, the adult kid filed a claim on his estate and got a big chunk of his money.

Not just because he called him Dad. Don’t be dense.

You should never let your kid call someone Dad or Mom when they are not biological or legally related. Breakups happen.

Likewise if your BFF auntie and you fall out, your kid loses an aunt. Think about how many friends you don't have around anymore.

When asked, other posters were saying OP can feel how she wants but shouldn’t try to dictate how her sister raises her child. No one tried to change OP’s opinion, just offering experiences when asked and trying to keep her from interfering with a child that isn’t her own.

Unsolicited, you’re trying to convince people how to parent, what they should have their kids call people, and what importance to place on relationships.

I find this strange. Are you OP?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:You must not be South Asian bc EVERYONE is an Auntie or Uncle. Which is really nice.

But only in name. They are not aunts and uncles like you want to pretend them to be.

+1. We call our parents’ friends “X Auntie/Uncle” but we call our actual relatives (and maybe parents’ absolute BFFs) the proper term in our language of origin.

Yes, this. I don’t ever call a real aunt “auntie” and don’t know anyone else who does. I was thinking the OP may be South Asian. It’s ok, though, just go with it. This friend is special and like a sister. She doesn’t want to do this with everyone. If you still aren’t over it, maybe broach if she could call her aunt in a different Indian language. Or some Indian languages have multiple types of aunt (mom’s sister vs dad’s sister). Ask her if she would be open to using the other version. It doesn’t need to be accurate.

[Anonymous]

You are being an absolute brat, OP. And so tacky to try and explain your irrational response by saying "in my culture."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You must not be South Asian bc EVERYONE is an Auntie or Uncle. Which is really nice.

But only in name. They are not aunts and uncles like you want to pretend them to be.

+1. We call our parents’ friends “X Auntie/Uncle” but we call our actual relatives (and maybe parents’ absolute BFFs) the proper term in our language of origin.

Yes, this. I don’t ever call a real aunt “auntie” and don’t know anyone else who does. I was thinking the OP may be South Asian. It’s ok, though, just go with it. This friend is special and like a sister. She doesn’t want to do this with everyone. If you still aren’t over it, maybe broach if she could call her aunt in a different Indian language. Or some Indian languages have multiple types of aunt (mom’s sister vs dad’s sister). Ask her if she would be open to using the other version. It doesn’t need to be accurate.

It’s not OP’s place to decide what her niece or nephew call other people.

[jsteele]

The OP is a troll who has been sock puppeting throughout the thread.