Wife spends too much money on stupid crafts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, do you even love your wife? I don't understand crafting either, but the way you are talking about your wife leads me to believe that you are no longer invested in the relationship. You are resentful of the money she spends, the time spent crafting, the weight that she's put on. Do you want to be married to this person anymore? You need to first have a real talk with her to get her to understand how you are feeling and for you both to make a plan to save your relationship. You may find that she feels similarly about you and your hobbies...

OP again. I asked her to move out this morning if she wasn’t willing to clear her crap. She can take the glitter-contaminated carpet with her but everything else stays. Now she’s acting contrite and says she wants to get help. Not if help is costing $100 an hour for a shrink. I told I’m done and it’s over. The responses here made me realize just how unhappy I am with my living situation and choice of partner.

Well good for you OP. You just signed up to take care of your kids by yourself 50% of the time while your wife goes out to get a full time job and probably gets a 50% reduction in childcare. And no one riding her ass about 20 pounds. It's a win win to me.

[Anonymous]

Why should she move out? You move out. I hope she has a good lawyer. You came into this w a bad attitude

[Anonymous]

Sure, OP. The problem here is definitely your wife.

*backs into hedge like Homer*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up with a hoarder mom and I HATE clutter, it gives me ptsd.
I would arrange for a special room or barn or whatever where she keeps all her crap.
When my child was younger the clutter stressed me out so much. I would literally throw his toys out of the kitchen back to the living room or made him take them to his room.
It is maddening

Get medication and therapy. At least op's thread is good for something.

OP here again. My mom was a hoarder too and it was one of the reasons I decided to cut contact. I can’t deal with the roaches and the piles of musty mildew stuff in my childhood home. My wife is not a hoarder but she’s getting there with all the stuff she’s piling up in her ‘craft room’. She spends time sitting and gluing with glitter and goodness knows what to gift to people, to put up on our walls, and I have told her her crafting is pretty pointless and doesn’t value add to anything. And yet is costing us at least $600 a month. That could pay for some personal training sessions at my gym but no, she rather sits at home cutting colorful paper and getting glitter over the carpet. I’m at my wits end.

My husband is driving me crazy with his constant insulting demands that I give up hobbies that I enjoy to spend time at his gym instead. I don't like the gym! Lots of people don't like going to gyms! They are not really safe right now due to Covid anyway, with all the heavy breathing and fluids everywhere etc. anyway, is he trying to kill me wtf?

Beyond that, though, my real question is why won't he give up his gym membership, his sports channel subscriptions, his videogame and porn habits, his super high speed internet connection, and his premium channel subscriptions and join together with me in the soothing activity of creating art for our home from Hobby Lobby supplies? I just don't understand why he is so reluctant to do so and doesn't see the benefits of something that is truly enjoyable and good for you? His gym membership isn't truly helping anyone or creating anything useful fwiw; he still has a dad bod and is prone to testosterone filled rage outs so I don't understand why he thinks he has the high ground here. I really think ten minutes with a glue gun and some sequins would absolutely change his life, but he won't even try. I just don't know how to reach him.

Pretty sure OP would see this at least a little differently if he'd just spend 30 minutes with a glue gun and some "make your own birdhouse" popsicle sticks, but go off, king.

[Anonymous]

Wow. She’s way better off without you. I hope she realizes that soon.

[Anonymous]

So you started this thread, cherry picked the 3 out of 100 responses you liked, and now claim your divorcing because of this thread? I call troll or jerk. I hope its a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not that pp, but the wife needs therapy to figure out why she is spending to be happier (which is probably going to cost more than the crafts spending...ask me how I know...)

And the OP needs therapy because he seems to hold his wife in contempt, which a lot of marriages never recover from.

So OP needs to spend $200 to speak to some stranger about his wife's crafting hobby? Is that supposed to make feel better? Do you not realize that is money down the drain? I think the claims that OP needs to pay alimony is overblown. If OP is renting, he can move out and let the wife take over and just quietly divorce. What is the big deal? Life is too short to spend it with someone who's unattractive, both inside and out.

No, the OP needs therapy because he sounds ragey and is super upset about 20 pounds after his wife has had kids. That is, if he eventually wants to save his marriage. If not, he doesn't need therapy at all.

OP again. We don’t have kids. I don’t understand why you think 20lbs is nothing when it’s just bad for the body. It’s not about the weight. It’s about what led to it and what’s keeping it on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you started this thread, cherry picked the 3 out of 100 responses you liked, and now claim your divorcing because of this thread? I call troll or jerk. I hope its a troll.

Most of the responses actually sided with the OP.

[Anonymous]

I don't think you can possibly be a real person, but this has been a fun thread.

[Anonymous]

Seeing this post on the front page near the announcement about Chadwick Boseman just makes me sick.

Life can be so gd painful and tragic. It’s hard to have any happiness at all in the bleakness. How lucky your wife is that she finds simple joy in her crafts. Good for her. I hope she divorces your ass because life is too short to be resented for having 20 extra pounds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up with a hoarder mom and I HATE clutter, it gives me ptsd.
I would arrange for a special room or barn or whatever where she keeps all her crap.
When my child was younger the clutter stressed me out so much. I would literally throw his toys out of the kitchen back to the living room or made him take them to his room.
It is maddening

Get medication and therapy. At least op's thread is good for something.

OP here again. My mom was a hoarder too and it was one of the reasons I decided to cut contact. I can’t deal with the roaches and the piles of musty mildew stuff in my childhood home. My wife is not a hoarder but she’s getting there with all the stuff she’s piling up in her ‘craft room’. She spends time sitting and gluing with glitter and goodness knows what to gift to people, to put up on our walls, and I have told her her crafting is pretty pointless and doesn’t value add to anything. And yet is costing us at least $600 a month. That could pay for some personal training sessions at my gym but no, she rather sits at home cutting colorful paper and getting glitter over the carpet. I’m at my wits end.

OP, be careful what you wish for. If she spent her time and money working out, maybe she’d lose a bunch of weight, get super hot, and leave your ass for a younger, hotter, richer dude who ALSO LIKES CRAFTING. Then they would spend all their time in his mansion coating their hot, super-ripped bods in glitter and having insane, acrobatic monkey sex on camera for a community of erotic crafters and making major ducats while you sit alone in your empty, craft-free house.

You, PP, are just the best. love it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up with a hoarder mom and I HATE clutter, it gives me ptsd.
I would arrange for a special room or barn or whatever where she keeps all her crap.
When my child was younger the clutter stressed me out so much. I would literally throw his toys out of the kitchen back to the living room or made him take them to his room.
It is maddening

Get medication and therapy. At least op's thread is good for something.

OP here again. My mom was a hoarder too and it was one of the reasons I decided to cut contact. I can’t deal with the roaches and the piles of musty mildew stuff in my childhood home. My wife is not a hoarder but she’s getting there with all the stuff she’s piling up in her ‘craft room’. She spends time sitting and gluing with glitter and goodness knows what to gift to people, to put up on our walls, and I have told her her crafting is pretty pointless and doesn’t value add to anything. And yet is costing us at least $600 a month. That could pay for some personal training sessions at my gym but no, she rather sits at home cutting colorful paper and getting glitter over the carpet. I’m at my wits end.

OP, be careful what you wish for. If she spent her time and money working out, maybe she’d lose a bunch of weight, get super hot, and leave your ass for a younger, hotter, richer dude who ALSO LIKES CRAFTING. Then they would spend all their time in his mansion coating their hot, super-ripped bods in glitter and having insane, acrobatic monkey sex on camera for a community of erotic crafters and making major ducats while you sit alone in your empty, craft-free house.

You, PP, are just the best. love it

I haven’t come across a guy who enjoys crafting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seeing this post on the front page near the announcement about Chadwick Boseman just makes me sick.

Life can be so gd painful and tragic. It’s hard to have any happiness at all in the bleakness. How lucky your wife is that she finds simple joy in her crafts. Good for her. I hope she divorces your ass because life is too short to be resented for having 20 extra pounds.

And at what point would you think resentment be okay? 100 lbs? I’m a married woman myself and I agree with the OP. My sister could be his wife. There are really women out there who spend time doing useless stuff and waste the family money on crap. I think if the wife made more financially sound decisions, it wouldn’t have been so bad. But to have CC debt because of Hobby Lobby is really stupid. And you’re stupid too PP for thinking that the OP is in the wrong just because some famous celeb died from cancer. Death happens every day and life is too short to spend it with a stupid person.

[Anonymous]

OP, decide together -the amount of money- that is discretionary, for each of you, and then don't not be a jerk --- it's discretionary ---- not for you to decide what's worthy.

[Anonymous]

OP, since you stated you don't have kids, just go ahead and get a divorce already. How long have you been married anyhow?