Dreading visit from smelly ILs

post reply Forum Index » Family Relationships

◄ 1 2 3 ... 10 11 12 Go

Go to page...

12/10/2018 16:01

Subject: Dreading visit from smelly ILs

quote

Anonymous

I wonder if it's rotting teeth? Or a crown not fitting properly. I have an incredible sense of smell (it's my super power) and this is the smell i associate most with old people.

report

12/10/2018 16:04

Subject: Dreading visit from smelly ILs

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:I believe you, OP. There is a certain "old person" / "sick person" smell that I can instantly recognize and I have to leave the area or else it really makes me feel like I am going to gag. I had not smelled it in years, until my daughter and I were in a restaurant and a gentleman came in with a caretaker and sat in a booth behind us, and INSTANTLY, my head snapped back and memory instantly flooded into my brain of visiting an older family member in her apartment with the rest of my family, and it was always soo hot, and the whole apartment had this smell! It is sort of like powder mixed with . . .unclean or sickly fleshy skin folds.. .? I don't know. It makes me so unhappy to even try to describe it. I can smell it in my brain but cannot describe it.

I don't know what advice to give. I just wanted to let you know I commiserate, and I hope you can find a resolution. As they do sound like lovely people.

Or, ugh, dirty hair. Once I was at the symphony and had to leave because the old woman in front of me had that unmistakable dirty scalp smell. It was AWFUL. I gagging just remembering it.

report

12/10/2018 16:14

Subject: Dreading visit from smelly ILs

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. These aren't food spices -- not even close. It's not mold or mildew. It's like a bad breath, rotting teeth smell -- I'm still not getting the description completely right. It's overpowering though. The last time MIL was in town I picked her up from the airport and the minute she got in my car, the smell hit me like a ton of bricks. I immediately thought how terrible it must have been for the passenger sitting next to her on her flight.

I wish there was an easy way to tell the ILs, but there isn't. DH isn't going to do it because he won't want to hurt them (he has no siblings), and me doing it just doesn't feel like the right answer. Oh well. I will just have to keep sucking it up like I've been doing for the past several years.

This is MY OWN mother. I actually posted about it here a few years ago and I got totally flamed I was genuinely asking for help and support and everyone accused me of being an awful, hateful person. My mother has always had an unpleasant odor to her. My sister and I call it "mom smell" when we talk about it. It is a mix of unwashed private parts and BO. It's awful and I am, totally mortified when she visits. I am talking she gets up from sitting on the couch and it smells. I have to febreeze all surfaces after she visits. I hate it. Neither of us has ever said anything to her because honestly she is just not the type of person you can say that too. She can be really mean and awful and a few times when I suggested she shower (she only showers every few days) she screamed at me. She is not depressed, her house is immaculate. She just SMELLS. I feel your pain OP.

Oh, god, I had the same mother, I think. One time one of my friends commented on her smell. I wanted to die.

She might have an infection. Or maybe she is using hippie detergent?

I hope my DD would make me aware if I stank.

She only showers every few days. I would imagine that she only launders clothes on occasion, too. There is a reason she's stinky - she doesn't wash and she smells funky! Like most people smell funky when they do not wash regularly.