No, I dont want to date women in their 40's

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing scarier to women, especially older women, than a man who knows his own value.

can you really imagine, say, tom brady or josh hartnett thinking or saying shit like this? that should be your clue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm in my forties, and none of my male friends in my age group could ever handle dating a Millennial. My friends don't thumb type quickly enough to keep up with the incessant texting, and they could never provide the volume of validation that twenty-somethings require.

It is of course, always possible to find women weigh low self esteem who will date anyone. The sheer number of women willing to write to men in prison is evidence of that.

I've avoided this particular thread, but I've commented on others of these age-disparity threads before.

I'm a Gen-X person and my spouse is too - we've got an 11 year spread so we're each on the bookends.

Before we got together, I dated - on a lark mostly - a young millenial - 22 year age difference - and no, it was bizzare. She wasn't massively insecure and didn't need lots of validation, but was a little out of step with her frat-bro contemporaries. I've dated massively insecure women my own age and older - age isn't the cure for insecurity unfortunately (as the troll regularly demonstrates). But the disconnect in generational views was just too much. There were just too many things that I wound up being a old dork about and she was a young twit about. Missed cultural references, etc.

I also have to say: no matter which gender, yeah, never married >35 you better investigate why. Nobody "needs" to get married, but it is the cultural norm/pressure, so you should investigate what path they've taken that's led them there (ie, was it a deliberate choice on their part). Even more important: never had any long term (>3 year) relationships. That's a huge warning flag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing scarier to women, especially older women, than a man who knows his own value.

can you really imagine, say, tom brady or josh hartnett thinking or saying shit like this? that should be your clue.

Ehhh... I don't know if there is a man douchier than Tom Brady, but I see your point. A man who is really secure with himself wouldn't say something like that.

[Anonymous]

Why would not having had a >3 year relationship be a red flag? Would if you were someone who just broke things off when it was clear it wasn't working? You can usually figure out in less than 3 years whether you're a good match or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"girl in 20's = I'm looking to have fun, have some new experiences, see the world and get to know myself before I settle down. this attracts a certain male type and they seek a certain male type to fill the role."

Yep. That "type" of man that 20-something women are looking to fill that role? Other 20-something men. (Or early 30's at the oldest).

Usually "fun" and "40+" don't go together in the minds of most 20-somethings.

Mid 30s is fine for surprisingly many girls in their 20s.

Yeah that's probably true. When I was dating in my late 20's I think my age-cutoff on my dating profile was around 36, which seemed pretty typical. Still, most of the men I dated were ~28-32.

I dont necessarily mean late 20s. Plenty 25 year olds will date up to 35. But as you get closer to 40, you lose some dating status as a guy. If i want to lock down a hot 25-29 chick it has to be within a couple years. I prefer to date 28-34.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing scarier to women, especially older women, than a man who knows his own value.

can you really imagine, say, tom brady or josh hartnett thinking or saying shit like this? that should be your clue.

Brady has his own worries, like his teams recent playoff failures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would not having had a >3 year relationship be a red flag? Would if you were someone who just broke things off when it was clear it wasn't working? You can usually figure out in less than 3 years whether you're a good match or not.

Women want a guy with serious relationship experience. Guys dont usually care much. Im a guy without it, so i lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would not having had a >3 year relationship be a red flag? Would if you were someone who just broke things off when it was clear it wasn't working? You can usually figure out in less than 3 years whether you're a good match or not.

Women want a guy with serious relationship experience. Guys dont usually care much. Im a guy without it, so i lie.

I just think you can usually figure out within 1-2 years if someone is "the One." If a man or a woman had a history of a lot of several-years long relationships, I would think they were just indecisive and commitment-phobic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing scarier to women, especially older women, than a man who knows his own value.

But value is a matter of what the market, not the individual, believes it is worth, no? So you could think of yourself as highly valuable but the market may think nothing of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing scarier to women, especially older women, than a man who knows his own value.

can you really imagine, say, tom brady or josh hartnett thinking or saying shit like this? that should be your clue.

Brady has his own worries, like his teams recent playoff failures.

Right. Because he is out there doing stuff instead of reflecting upon his imaginary mating value all day long.

[Anonymous]

I love how the 37 yo perv keeps coming back for more. He must miss his beta days where he could just be himself and let women stomp all over him. Oh, the freedom to just be...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love how the 37 yo perv keeps coming back for more. He must miss his beta days where he could just be himself and let women stomp all over him. Oh, the freedom to just be...

hey its me again!

i know it might make you feel better to think that at one point in time i was all alone and a simp. but the truth is that i always had success with females even at a young age. it was around age 24 where i thought, ok all this is getting me no where and i should just find a nice girl to settle down with and have a family. i made a conscious effort to be accommodating hell even ended up supplicating in some ways. and that didn't work out for me. she lost attraction when she knew i was 100% committed and even 100% committed to making her happy. women have a funny way of (not) rewarding behavior like that.

so once the divorce happened i made a decision to stay committed to the notion that i was the prize and not the other way around. and what do you know, that lead to even more success with women than i had had in the past.

look, this is a message board where these topics are being debated. do i go around telling people in real life that my value is high? of course not. my life and the way i live it demonstrate that automatically. but what it does it allows me to maintain the dignity to stand up for myself and i want in life and it has worked out.

it would certainly be annoying to all involved if on approach to a new woman i declared i was high value. no, you demonstrate that by just being the best man you can be.

it is not unusual for woman to be unaware of what they really find attractive as opposed to what they think they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love how the 37 yo perv keeps coming back for more. He must miss his beta days where he could just be himself and let women stomp all over him. Oh, the freedom to just be...

hey its me again!

i know it might make you feel better to think that at one point in time i was all alone and a simp. but the truth is that i always had success with females even at a young age. it was around age 24 where i thought, ok all this is getting me no where and i should just find a nice girl to settle down with and have a family. i made a conscious effort to be accommodating hell even ended up supplicating in some ways. and that didn't work out for me. she lost attraction when she knew i was 100% committed and even 100% committed to making her happy. women have a funny way of (not) rewarding behavior like that.

so once the divorce happened i made a decision to stay committed to the notion that i was the prize and not the other way around. and what do you know, that lead to even more success with women than i had had in the past.

look, this is a message board where these topics are being debated. do i go around telling people in real life that my value is high? of course not. my life and the way i live it demonstrate that automatically. but what it does it allows me to maintain the dignity to stand up for myself and i want in life and it has worked out.

it would certainly be annoying to all involved if on approach to a new woman i declared i was high value. no, you demonstrate that by just being the best man you can be.

it is not unusual for woman to be unaware of what they really find attractive as opposed to what they think they want.

You are very successful alright. You found some freakozoid who agreed to the type of relationship that 90%+ of both and women find totally abhorrent and unacceptable while you are banging some 20 yo skanks on a side. Congratulations! Your parents - and your children - must be so proud of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing scarier to women, especially older women, than a man who knows his own value.

can you really imagine, say, tom brady or josh hartnett thinking or saying shit like this? that should be your clue.

Brady has his own worries, like his teams recent playoff failures.

Right. Because he is out there doing stuff instead of reflecting upon his imaginary mating value all day long.

everyone has hobbies and interests outside of the things that make up their core value. i am hardly defined by this interest in these dynamics nor my occasional willingness to engage in discussions about them with random anonymous people. i can assure you i'm multi tasking this in with professional work, social interactions and other recreational activities.

you don't tom brady thought to himself, damn i'm a star football player and i should probably find a mate of equal value? right, thats why he married a total no body with average looks. oh wait. nevermind.

virtually all of what i am saying occurs in people's subconscious and drives their behaviors in ways they can't understand.

criticizing me for being what amounts to an anthropology hobbyist is ridiculous and ad hominem which reveals the weakness in your positions.

in fact, most of the folks on this thread except for a couple who made thoughtful posts have simply resorted to ad hominem attacks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love how the 37 yo perv keeps coming back for more. He must miss his beta days where he could just be himself and let women stomp all over him. Oh, the freedom to just be...

hey its me again!

i know it might make you feel better to think that at one point in time i was all alone and a simp. but the truth is that i always had success with females even at a young age. it was around age 24 where i thought, ok all this is getting me no where and i should just find a nice girl to settle down with and have a family. i made a conscious effort to be accommodating hell even ended up supplicating in some ways. and that didn't work out for me. she lost attraction when she knew i was 100% committed and even 100% committed to making her happy. women have a funny way of (not) rewarding behavior like that.

so once the divorce happened i made a decision to stay committed to the notion that i was the prize and not the other way around. and what do you know, that lead to even more success with women than i had had in the past.

look, this is a message board where these topics are being debated. do i go around telling people in real life that my value is high? of course not. my life and the way i live it demonstrate that automatically. but what it does it allows me to maintain the dignity to stand up for myself and i want in life and it has worked out.

it would certainly be annoying to all involved if on approach to a new woman i declared i was high value. no, you demonstrate that by just being the best man you can be.

it is not unusual for woman to be unaware of what they really find attractive as opposed to what they think they want.

You are very successful alright. You found some freakozoid who agreed to the type of relationship that 90%+ of both and women find totally abhorrent and unacceptable while you are banging some 20 yo skanks on a side. Congratulations! Your parents - and your children - must be so proud of you.

naturally this is the difference. some people find it very offensive, obviously, when two adults decide on a romantic structure that varies from the norm. it has absolutely no impact on you and has had zero negative impact on the family unit we have and has in fact created an exceptionally open and honest dialogue.

i read people on here who don't even have the courage to tell their husbands to please do more chores or please lick my pussy - and you're demonizing my relationship where we are able to discuss things which make most people break down in jealous fits of rage?

tackling jealous and fear has made us both bigger and stronger people. we communicate more openly and honestly than most people i can see on here who are worried about their wives seeing their browser history or women that just wish their men would do simple little things which could be communicated.

call her a freakazoid or whatever, but all it does is reveal your close mindedness and your inability to understand that as adults we are capable of deciding for us what works and what doesn't - rather than simply conform to the standard get married have kids get divorced process playing out in increasingly higher numbers all over this city.