Tell me about redshirting your late summer/fall birthday son before Kindergarten

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:We did with a June birthday. We just knew he wasn’t ready. Best decision ever. Turns out he has some leaning disabilities. Had we sent him on time he would have struggled even more than he is now.

Here’s that “best decision ever” that earlier post correctly stated every red-shirter just automatically says.

The best decision would have been to get that child evaluated early on and get them help.

You have no idea what was the best decision for my kid.

That was what was best with you if you just ignored the issues and delayed it a year. If your child had learning disabilities, you get them tested and help asap and not wait.

You are making the assumption that people that redshirt have learning disabilities.

That’s not true for any of the families that I know personally that have redshirted. Literally not a single one.

You say that like it’s a good thing.

That’s for the parents to determine. Face it: for some birthdays, they get a choice of when to send the kid.

Face it: parents make bad choices. When they affect others, it’s not okay.

Not your choice. And the vast majority of redshirting parents DON’T think it was a bad choice.

Well, what else are they going to say?

No regrets here either despite the crazies.

[Anonymous]

A friend of mine chose not to redshirt and ended up regretting that decision. She went private to repeat kindergarten, so she ended up exactly in the same spot as if she had redshirted in the first place. Depending on the schools available near you, this might be an option if K ends up not going smoothly (although odds are it will!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are at well known private school in DC. My DD is redshirted with an end of August birthday (sept 1st cutoff). She is doing great academically both on grade level tests (ERB) and on age adjusted tests (WISC)… she is basically in the 90th-99th percentile in everything. That said, the reason I redshirted was because she was and still is emotionally immature and was not as self confident in her abilities as most/all her class mates. She had trouble making friends, fit in, etc. She is just growing slower than her peers even from a physical development point of view which was not obvious in PK.
Redshirting was great for her and at the time was recommended by teachers and the school psychologist. She is never the oldest in the class, but she is usually top 5 (out of 20 kids). She has friends and is thriving. I am so glad I was able to hold her back.

And by the way she had/has no learning disabilities whatsoever, is not short, not behind, nothing… she is just maturing a little slower than her peers and being older her helped her navigate friendships and the school environment much better than if she were the youngest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are at well known private school in DC. My DD is redshirted with an end of August birthday (sept 1st cutoff). She is doing great academically both on grade level tests (ERB) and on age adjusted tests (WISC)… she is basically in the 90th-99th percentile in everything. That said, the reason I redshirted was because she was and still is emotionally immature and was not as self confident in her abilities as most/all her class mates. She had trouble making friends, fit in, etc. She is just growing slower than her peers even from a physical development point of view which was not obvious in PK.
Redshirting was great for her and at the time was recommended by teachers and the school psychologist. She is never the oldest in the class, but she is usually top 5 (out of 20 kids). She has friends and is thriving. I am so glad I was able to hold her back.

Privates want the kids held back, it’s easier for them and scores are better. All children are emotionally immature. You did a disservice if she was scoring in the plus 90 percentile and causing a delay in her abilities. Why would you want to stunt her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did with a June birthday. We just knew he wasn’t ready. Best decision ever. Turns out he has some leaning disabilities. Had we sent him on time he would have struggled even more than he is now.

Here’s that “best decision ever” that earlier post correctly stated every red-shirter just automatically says.

The best decision would have been to get that child evaluated early on and get them help.

You have no idea what was the best decision for my kid.

That was what was best with you if you just ignored the issues and delayed it a year. If your child had learning disabilities, you get them tested and help asap and not wait.

You are making the assumption that people that redshirt have learning disabilities.

That’s not true for any of the families that I know personally that have redshirted. Literally not a single one.

You say that like it’s a good thing.

That’s for the parents to determine. Face it: for some birthdays, they get a choice of when to send the kid.

Face it: parents make bad choices. When they affect others, it’s not okay.

Not your choice. And the vast majority of redshirting parents DON’T think it was a bad choice.

Well, what else are they going to say?

No regrets here either despite the crazies.

That being yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anyone and everyone can say their child is emotionally delayed or maturing slower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone and everyone can say their child is emotionally delayed or maturing slower.

And? Parents with the option to redshirt don’t need to justify their choices - not to the school and not on this board.

This is about people’s personal experiences having chosen to redshirt, and whether they think it worked out for the best.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Redshirted my July bday son now in seventh grade. I haven’t regretted it once! One of our best parenting decisions made based on the teacher’s recommendations.

Hahahhahahahaaahhah! “Best decision” and “teacher recommendation”. On repeat! Hahahhahahahahahah!

Such a bizarre response. You have parents with many years having passed since the decision was made and with time to see how it worked out. If you regret your redshirting decision, or decision not to redshirt, then share. But don’t presume to know what was best for other people’s kids.

I have shared. I regretted it. Kid skipped K. to make up for it. Years later, even with the developmental delays, holding back made no sense. Instead we addressed the issue so the child could be successful.

Great! So OP can read your experience and also read mine and make the decision that’s best for OP’s child. No need to bash those who made a different choice (and are thrilled with the results).

No one is bashing. We are concerned for kids whose parents choose to ignore their delays and special needs by holding them back a year vs. getting them the help they need to be successful. That is the point. If you are saying your child has delays, holding back doesn't change things, it delays things and these kids will always have the delays.

Yeah no. Replying “hahahaha” to someone else’s experience is absolutely bashing, and juvenile too.

DP-so what if someone replied in such a way. What does that have to do with the redshirting and delay issue, other than you trying to deflect?

Go back and read the thread above so you can understand.

Again, so what. I don’t need to read the thread, it does not matter. You are hell bent on deflecting.

It’s pure gaslighting to suggest that a response of HAHAHA is anything other than bashing. This sub thread was in response to that, and the subsequent false claim that “no one is bashing.”

Who cares? Haahahhahahahhahahha!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone and everyone can say their child is emotionally delayed or maturing slower.

And? Parents with the option to redshirt don’t need to justify their choices - not to the school and not on this board.

This is about people’s personal experiences having chosen to redshirt, and whether they think it worked out for the best.

Personal choices are not brought into a classroom that affects others.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:My late November son started Kindergarten at 4 y.o. In NYC public, there is no option to redshirt.
He entered Stuy as a 13 year old freshman with a very high SHSAT score last fall.
He's never fallen behind academically.
Given his age, he has the luxury of taking a gap year after high school without feeling like he's on the older side when he starts college.

That is correct that redshirting in not allowed in New York. Rightfully so.

Only in public schools and even then it’s not as strict as you make out. Also, when the rest of the country allows it and NY doesn’t, maybe NY is wrong. God knows they are hardly a paradigm of exceptional education in other respects.

Allowing redshirting is a paradigm of exceptional education?

Yes.

God knows it sure is not the NYC public school system.

Because red-shirting every child is the way. Okay, you.
In your case, it may be justified to red-shirt you.

NP. Why do you care if other people choose to redshirt THEIR children? I don’t understand why the anti redshirting people feel so strongly about other parents’ choices. My DD was born in October, but were she born in august or September ai might have redshirted her. Either way, I don’t care what other people choose to do for THEIR kids. What is it to you? Does it put your child at a disadvantage? I don’t see the pro redshirting people care at all about parents that choose to send their kids on time… bizarre

I haven't posted, but I care because my young 5 year old then ends up with kids more than a year older than him instead of of just following the rules. My august boy did have some small adjustment problems at the beginning of K (getting used to the behavior expectations, he wasn't reading yet when he started, but he did catch up in both things by the middle of the year.) Now he's above grade level and there was definitely no reason to redshirt - besides maybe just having more time with him as a baby. There are actually a ton of summer babies in his class and its DC public so barely anyone redshirts because we want free PreK-3.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are at well known private school in DC. My DD is redshirted with an end of August birthday (sept 1st cutoff). She is doing great academically both on grade level tests (ERB) and on age adjusted tests (WISC)… she is basically in the 90th-99th percentile in everything. That said, the reason I redshirted was because she was and still is emotionally immature and was not as self confident in her abilities as most/all her class mates. She had trouble making friends, fit in, etc. She is just growing slower than her peers even from a physical development point of view which was not obvious in PK.
Redshirting was great for her and at the time was recommended by teachers and the school psychologist. She is never the oldest in the class, but she is usually top 5 (out of 20 kids). She has friends and is thriving. I am so glad I was able to hold her back.

Privates want the kids held back, it’s easier for them and scores are better. All children are emotionally immature. You did a disservice if she was scoring in the plus 90 percentile and causing a delay in her abilities. Why would you want to stunt her?

What? No, she was immature compared to her classmates. The psychologist is a professional and so are the teachers. We were applying out and had ti decide PK or K so the school/teachers we were at had no interest in keeping my DD one extra year. You are really over reaching here. You are speaking about things and children you know nothing about about. You are mean and trying to bully other parents in making the same choice you made. I am not causing any delay. My DD speaks several languages and reads fluently in 2. You have no idea about my child, our school, or anything else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are at well known private school in DC. My DD is redshirted with an end of August birthday (sept 1st cutoff). She is doing great academically both on grade level tests (ERB) and on age adjusted tests (WISC)… she is basically in the 90th-99th percentile in everything. That said, the reason I redshirted was because she was and still is emotionally immature and was not as self confident in her abilities as most/all her class mates. She had trouble making friends, fit in, etc. She is just growing slower than her peers even from a physical development point of view which was not obvious in PK.
Redshirting was great for her and at the time was recommended by teachers and the school psychologist. She is never the oldest in the class, but she is usually top 5 (out of 20 kids). She has friends and is thriving. I am so glad I was able to hold her back.

And by the way she had/has no learning disabilities whatsoever, is not short, not behind, nothing… she is just maturing a little slower than her peers and being older her helped her navigate friendships and the school environment much better than if she were the youngest.

Who are you considering her peers? Her peers are not kids a year younger or older when you are talking about maturity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My late November son started Kindergarten at 4 y.o. In NYC public, there is no option to redshirt.
He entered Stuy as a 13 year old freshman with a very high SHSAT score last fall.
He's never fallen behind academically.
Given his age, he has the luxury of taking a gap year after high school without feeling like he's on the older side when he starts college.

That is correct that redshirting in not allowed in New York. Rightfully so.

Only in public schools and even then it’s not as strict as you make out. Also, when the rest of the country allows it and NY doesn’t, maybe NY is wrong. God knows they are hardly a paradigm of exceptional education in other respects.

Allowing redshirting is a paradigm of exceptional education?

Yes.

God knows it sure is not the NYC public school system.

Because red-shirting every child is the way. Okay, you.
In your case, it may be justified to red-shirt you.

NP. Why do you care if other people choose to redshirt THEIR children? I don’t understand why the anti redshirting people feel so strongly about other parents’ choices. My DD was born in October, but were she born in august or September ai might have redshirted her. Either way, I don’t care what other people choose to do for THEIR kids. What is it to you? Does it put your child at a disadvantage? I don’t see the pro redshirting people care at all about parents that choose to send their kids on time… bizarre

I haven't posted, but I care because my young 5 year old then ends up with kids more than a year older than him instead of of just following the rules. My august boy did have some small adjustment problems at the beginning of K (getting used to the behavior expectations, he wasn't reading yet when he started, but he did catch up in both things by the middle of the year.) Now he's above grade level and there was definitely no reason to redshirt - besides maybe just having more time with him as a baby. There are actually a ton of summer babies in his class and its DC public so barely anyone redshirts because we want free PreK-3.

That’s great that it worked out for you! I redshirted my child and it worked out for us too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are at well known private school in DC. My DD is redshirted with an end of August birthday (sept 1st cutoff). She is doing great academically both on grade level tests (ERB) and on age adjusted tests (WISC)… she is basically in the 90th-99th percentile in everything. That said, the reason I redshirted was because she was and still is emotionally immature and was not as self confident in her abilities as most/all her class mates. She had trouble making friends, fit in, etc. She is just growing slower than her peers even from a physical development point of view which was not obvious in PK.
Redshirting was great for her and at the time was recommended by teachers and the school psychologist. She is never the oldest in the class, but she is usually top 5 (out of 20 kids). She has friends and is thriving. I am so glad I was able to hold her back.

Privates want the kids held back, it’s easier for them and scores are better. All children are emotionally immature. You did a disservice if she was scoring in the plus 90 percentile and causing a delay in her abilities. Why would you want to stunt her?

What? No, she was immature compared to her classmates. The psychologist is a professional and so are the teachers. We were applying out and had ti decide PK or K so the school/teachers we were at had no interest in keeping my DD one extra year. You are really over reaching here. You are speaking about things and children you know nothing about about. You are mean and trying to bully other parents in making the same choice you made. I am not causing any delay. My DD speaks several languages and reads fluently in 2. You have no idea about my child, our school, or anything else.

This makes zero sense to hold back. Zero if she's that bright. You get her social skills classes and work with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone and everyone can say their child is emotionally delayed or maturing slower.

Another ignorant with a subpar education. Mine took the Vineland and his adaptive behavior score was 8 instead of 50.