To those moms who formula fed their children

[Anonymous]

For a number of reasons, I had to stop breastfeeding my second child at 5 weeks. Trust me, there was no alternative. She is now on formula and I feel awful about the state of affairs (especially since I breastfed my first child for a much longer period of time).

Please tell me about your experiences with formula feeding. I think I need some reassurance (no matter how unscientific) that my child will nonetheless be happy and healthy.

[Anonymous]

Don't feel bad OP. I had to stop BF BOTH my kids at around 3 weeks. There was no alternative in either case. I used to feel aweful. I was ashamed that I had to stop. Then, when I saw them thriving and growing on the formula I felt much much better. It will be OK. They are both happy and healthy children and don't get any sicker than other kids their age who were EBF for a year or longer.

[Anonymous]

Everything will be just fine! Don't be so hard on yourself! FYI, if this is your second, your baby will be exposed to far more germs through your oldest than your first one was. So if this baby gets sick more often than your first, please don't jump to assume it's because this one is on formula and your first wasn't.

[Anonymous]

You'll get over it. You will. Give it another week or two, and you'll be fine. More importantly, you'll probably see no difference in the health and happiness of your two children.

Good luck and congrats on your new addition!

[Anonymous]

This is not something you need to anguish over, although I did at the time. My DD who is now 8 months gets about 50-80% of her milk from formula. What matters is she is getting love and affection from you.

But, if it makes you feel better: My husband who is utterly brilliant (has multiple degrees from a Top 3 university), healthy, sensitive, was formula fed, because his mother had to go back to work at 2 weeks. There are ancedotes for both, so in my opinion, it is all a wash. You did a great job BFing her until you couldn't.

[Anonymous]

There is absolutely no reason to feel guilty. Remember that your first goal is to feed your child. What you feed your child (breastmilk or formula) is of secondary importance.

I had some medical issues that made breastfeeding a complete struggle. I managed to make it to 3.5 months (supplementing after three weeks) - I struggled and struggled and didn't stop only because I thought I wouldfeel guilty. And then I stopped and realized that so much of my physical and emotional resources were spent on breastfeeding, and that I was a better mom when I formula fed. My only regret is that I pushed breastfeeding so long, to the detriment of my entire family - I wish that I had the good sense to stop earlier.

My daughter is very happy and healthy.

[Anonymous]

I adopted my first child, who was 11 months old when she came home. She had been on formula since she was born. Technically I guess I could've tried to induce lactation and breastfeed, but since she was so close to a year, the thought never even crossed my mind.

She is a happy and healthy child. To echo 11:06, I breastfed my 2nd child and he definitely got (and still gets) sick more often than the older one

Don't beat yourself up and congrats!

[Anonymous]

I didn't even attempt to breast feed. My son has been on formula since he was born. He is a very happy and healthy child.

[Anonymous]

Ff kids in daycare from 3 months of age. Missed a total of five workdays between the two for illness. They are 3 and 5, with their yearly checkups coming up soon. Neither has seen the ped in a year. The oldest is reading, swimming, riding a bike. The youngest knows her phonics and eats everything in sight. They are both healthy, happy, thriving kids and we love them to pieces. None of us care what they were fed in infancy.

[Anonymous]

My oldest is 6, and she was formula fed starting at day 1 (combined with breast milk for about 4 months). She's healthy, happy, intelligent...I wish I'd stopped beating myself up over it much sooner.

[Anonymous]

My nine year old seems to have survived the ordeal unscathed.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for all the quick replies. I have been in tears over this issue.

[Anonymous]

OP, like you I have two kids. I BF the first and expected to do so with the second, but ended up switching to FF at about 1 month as a result of reflux. I had a lot of angst around it but honestly two years later I can't tell you that it matters in the least. The second one is a mini me of his brother with almost identical development. I also stressed about it just because that's what we're programmed to do. It's inevitable but totally pointless in the scheme of things. What matters is being a good loving parent!

[Anonymous]

You are not defined by your ability to breastfeed...you are a great mother for admiting that an alternative, which not your preference, was needed...you are providing your child with a tried and true form of nutrition that will result in a happy, thriving child.

[Anonymous]

Another adoptive mom here. Formula-fed child, now age 7, happy, healthy, etc. I don't get the shame thing here. Why look for opportunities to make yourself miserable?