Forum Index
»
Infants, Toddlers, & Preschoolers
To those moms who formula fed their children
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
Remember, your hormones are raging. 
|
Anonymous
| The baby got the colostrum. That's the most important part. So pat yourself on the back! |
Anonymous
|
Please do not be in tears over this. You fed your child. That is all that matters.
|
Anonymous
I formula fed my son which led to me having a ton of guilt and eventually caused some postpartum. 2.5 years later I have issues that seem SO far more important than the miniscule & ridiculous debate over breast feeing vs. formula feeding. My son is perfectly healthy -only gets 1-3 colds per year that don't keep him out of activities. (now I will jinx myself and he will get terribly sick  ) He is brighter than his peers that were "breast fed". I am pregnant with my second child and due any day now -I will try hard to breast feed again but WILL NOT let it cause the guilt it did with my son, particularly after seeing how healthy he turned out! I was depressed and not a good mom in the early days of feeling guilty over my inability to breast feed!
good luck to you!! |
Anonymous
| OP, don't give it another worrying thought. Your baby will be great, and no one can tell the difference between a breast fed and formula fed child or adult-- not the parents, the teachers, friends or pediatricians-- Really! And, assuming you have a spouse/partner, their participation in feeding your child is a wonderful thing, for both parent and child! |
Anonymous
| FF since day 1 (for medical reasons) - and she has done great! |
Anonymous
|
not the OP, but wow this thread has brought me to tears. i also have a 5 week old and made the difficult decision to wean her. we have had a variety of BF challenges which I really tried to overcome, but totally hit the limits of my sanity. i realized i had become a crazy person, always crying, agonizing, etc., and not being an effective mother to either of my children or present at all for my DH. so we're done.
OP, i FF'ed my older child from 3.5 weeks and he is beautiful and smart as a whip. can't say he hasn't had some health challenges, because he spent pretty much the first year and a half of life being sick from something, but i attribute that to daycare. this year he has only had a couple of minor colds. |
Anonymous
|
I tried to breastfeed my son when he was born - turns out I could not produce enough milk. I've never been formally diagnosed, but I have all the symptoms of hypoplastic breasts (or insufficient glandular tissue). My breasts are sort of tubular and widely spaced, and one is slightly bigger than the other. They never grew during pregnancy, I never got engorged, and my milk never really came in. I could make a little, but not nearly enough. My son was always hungry and wasn't gaining weight like he should have. I was at the end of my rope, so we called in a lactation consultant. She brought her scale and that's how we figured out that I was not producing. I pumped (which I loathed) and supplemented with formula for around 6 or 8 weeks, then switched to formula exclusively and never looked back. My son is now 5 and about to finish kindergarten this June. He's been in daycare since he was 9 weeks old. I can count the number of times he's been sick on one hand. Whenever we go to the pediatrician for his well visits, they always comment on how thin his chart is! He's extremely healthy and intelligent, with the report cards to prove it! I have no regrets whatsoever about giving him formula. My husband and I were formula fed as babies and we've done very well for ourselves!
Now I'm nearly 35 weeks pregnant with our second baby. Same issue with my breasts this time around - no change in size whatsoever. I expect I will have the same challenges with breastfeeding, but this time I have more experience and I will not beat myself up about it. I will try breastfeeding again but I will have the formula at the ready. Breastfeeding is a wonderful thing, but for a variety of reasons, not all women are able to do it. Baby still needs to eat, so unless you want other women to donate their milk for your baby (like in today's Washington Post article about milk exchanges), grab the formula and know that you are a great mom and you're doing the very best you can for your baby girl. In the grand scheme of parenting, how and what you feed your baby during infancy is so insignificant compared to the myriad other challenges and adventures that lie ahead! |
Anonymous
| I stopped breastfeeding at 6 months and my daughter is perfectly healthy and happy. She doesn't get sick a lot at all and is in day care, so I expected a lot of sick days. There has been one. Everything will be fine!! |
Anonymous
| OP and pp's, thank you for this thread. I am nursing my three week old and everyday is a struggle. Each night I tell myself, just try to make it one more day...DH is supportive of switching just to save my sanity, but I'm trying to nurse as long as possible. My mom keeps reminding me I was FF as a baby and have led a happy, healthy life, but the internal and external pressure to BF is just so overwhelming. |
Anonymous
| OP, I totally know what you are going through. I didn't breastfeed either of my children ever. I had a lot of medical issues going on that doctors were unable to diagnose quickly. I cringe and hold back the tears everytime someone blurts out "breast is best!" This said, my 4 and 2 year old are doing great. I have been told by others that they are clearly very bright. My pediatrician is always stunned when I tell him they were formula fed because they are rarely sick, very tall, and perfect weight (both children are very lean). |
Anonymous
| I agonized over BF and did everything physically possible--no matter what, for 4 months, I could not make more than a few ounces/day. My DC was primarily FF with a tiny amount of BM. I beat myself up, really felt awful over it, and it was a really big deal to me at the time to the point of obsession. Now DC is 4 and I almost laugh at how crazy I was over the BF. DC is very healthy and amazingly, has been sick much less than peers. I have friends with BF babies who seem to pick up every virus that goes around. I know it's hard to accept now but we each do the best we can in the moment and the reality is that in the scheme of things, this is not so significant. Just enjoy your DC! |
Anonymous
I was where you were when I was at three weeks...I decided to quit and start supplementing, and pump just to clear out the mastitis. I ended up EPing for a couple months and supplementing (some days a lot, some days a little). There is a whole spectrum of "right" ways to feed your baby...ranging from FF from day one, BF until the toddler years, combination feeding for a few months, then formula feeding...I think once I took the pressure off of myself to exclusively breastfeed, I felt a million times better and felt like i could then make a decision that was best for my family. Congrats on your new little one - enjoy your little one. Ellyn Satter says that the only people who should feel guilty about the way they feed their children are the people who didn't make a thoughtful decision. The fact that you care so much says volumes about the way you are raising your child, and the kind of mother you are...  Whether your baby drinks breastmilk or formula just doesn't convey the same thing.
|
Anonymous
| IMO, too much energy is spent on BF vs FF debates. BF would be nice but FF babies will do just fine too, and it would be better if we could all focus more on establishing toddler/kid's healthy eating habits, that would last for a lifetime. |
Anonymous
|
Yet another mom here who couldn't make it past 3 weeks (horrible supply), and who felt guilty for MONTHS. I focused my energy on having very calm, quiet, loving, touchy-feely feeding sessions where I showered him with love, affection, attention, skin-to-skin contact, soothing words, songs,etc. Don't underestimate the significance of the actual love/bonding being done during feeding times.
I have a healthy, bright, happy, thin (since people make an issue of obesity and FF) four year old boy. Parenthood is never ideal. Try to take the mindset that you will do the best with what you've got, and you'll be much happier. Best wishes. |