Errands with Maskless ASD child?

[Anonymous]

Op, I just ubered my maskless ASD child to his therapy since our car is at the mechanic. For the first time since the pandemic no one said a word to me. Either i was lucky or some ppl are easing up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Call your bank *gasp* and communicate with them. Yes, you need to go, and possibly with your unmasked son who has been exposed,unmasked, to several health care workers in the previous time period. See if there are options for your services. Before hours, after hours - many banks offer “other” services by appointment only that will afford you service without being part of the fray. But to get them, you need to communicate.

FWIW, I did contact the bank and inquired about alternatives, since it's going to be very disruptive to pull him out of therapy to bring him to the bank during business hours. I was very clear about what I'd have to do, and they told me just to bring him along. I get that that is fine for them, but it is far from ideal for me and my child.

Similarly, I checked with the other establishments I'd be going to, who all told me this was a non-issue from their perspective.

I always knew DCUM would be on the more extreme side on this. And that's specifically why I posted here, and specifically in the regular toddler forum rather than the special needs forum. I'm trying to identify some mutually-agreeable reasonable accommodation here that would give demographic represented by the DCUM crowd some peace of mind.

But, my takeaway here is that I'll likely get snarky remarks and looks regardless of what I do. And if that's really the case, then I'm not going to bother taking some of the more extreme mitigations, like using a plastic weather shield. I see no reason to put my kid through that if it's not actually going to make you all feel better.

Well, it’s not necessarily about others feeling better. It’s about being a good member of the community and taking every precaution that you possibly can to ensure that you and your family are not a risk to others.

So it may be a non issue to establishments, but in the end, COVID is spreading in terms of paper it’s everywhere. It’s every person not doing their little part that contributes to the spread. Yea, community spread is relatively low, and brining your son is probably fine, but, well.. I guess you don’t care, OP. I can see it in your responses that you don’t care. I don’t think people have been extreme, and I think in general, people are sensitive of special needs in these cases.

So let’s be fair. You’re feeling angry and burned out, like so many people are right now. You want the answer that you want, which is that it’s fine to take your kid massless into establishments. The reality is, it’s not fine, but it’s understandable, but like you, everyone has reached their own level of burnout right now and you may receive some snark. LIKE YOU, people are tired of fighting their kids into masks, into wearing one themselves, into being home, into whatever s**t they have right now.

In any case, OP, I hope you get your errands done, and I hope you will try to mitigate any impact of the safety your community.

[Anonymous]

OP, I’m just amazed that you don’t care that you are putting your child at risk for covid. I’m all for being a good citizen, but at the end of the day, I would be leaving my kid at home because I’m not going to risk my child getting ill. I just can’t imagine purposely exposing my child for such a stupid reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Call your bank *gasp* and communicate with them. Yes, you need to go, and possibly with your unmasked son who has been exposed,unmasked, to several health care workers in the previous time period. See if there are options for your services. Before hours, after hours - many banks offer “other” services by appointment only that will afford you service without being part of the fray. But to get them, you need to communicate.

FWIW, I did contact the bank and inquired about alternatives, since it's going to be very disruptive to pull him out of therapy to bring him to the bank during business hours. I was very clear about what I'd have to do, and they told me just to bring him along. I get that that is fine for them, but it is far from ideal for me and my child.

Similarly, I checked with the other establishments I'd be going to, who all told me this was a non-issue from their perspective.

I always knew DCUM would be on the more extreme side on this. And that's specifically why I posted here, and specifically in the regular toddler forum rather than the special needs forum. I'm trying to identify some mutually-agreeable reasonable accommodation here that would give demographic represented by the DCUM crowd some peace of mind.

But, my takeaway here is that I'll likely get snarky remarks and looks regardless of what I do. And if that's really the case, then I'm not going to bother taking some of the more extreme mitigations, like using a plastic weather shield. I see no reason to put my kid through that if it's not actually going to make you all feel better.

Well, it’s not necessarily about others feeling better. It’s about being a good member of the community and taking every precaution that you possibly can to ensure that you and your family are not a risk to others.

So it may be a non issue to establishments, but in the end, COVID is spreading in terms of paper it’s everywhere. It’s every person not doing their little part that contributes to the spread. Yea, community spread is relatively low, and brining your son is probably fine, but, well.. I guess you don’t care, OP. I can see it in your responses that you don’t care. I don’t think people have been extreme, and I think in general, people are sensitive of special needs in these cases.

So let’s be fair. You’re feeling angry and burned out, like so many people are right now. You want the answer that you want, which is that it’s fine to take your kid massless into establishments. The reality is, it’s not fine, but it’s understandable, but like you, everyone has reached their own level of burnout right now and you may receive some snark. LIKE YOU, people are tired of fighting their kids into masks, into wearing one themselves, into being home, into whatever s**t they have right now.

In any case, OP, I hope you get your errands done, and I hope you will try to mitigate any impact of the safety your community.

I'd argue that OP DOES care, or she wouldn't be posting here. She'd just be doing her errands and then some without a care in the world, like so many other people in this country are doing. If more people were making purposeful, conscious choices, we'd be in better shape overall. This area is such a bubble! There are states where you can't even get the adults to wear masks in stores- one 3yo out for the occasional errand is just not a big deal in the grand scheme of things.

Do what you have to do OP, although I agree with the suggestions to get a sitter if you can, if for no other reason than to give yourself a break. I understand it may be difficult to find a sitter for a child who is exposed to many health care professionals, but there might be someone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I’m just amazed that you don’t care that you are putting your child at risk for covid. I’m all for being a good citizen, but at the end of the day, I would be leaving my kid at home because I’m not going to risk my child getting ill. I just can’t imagine purposely exposing my child for such a stupid reason.

But the child is more at risk from the medical parent and team of therapists. A visit to the store or bank where they can stay 6+ feet away is a pretty small risk in comparison.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, I just ubered my maskless ASD child to his therapy since our car is at the mechanic. For the first time since the pandemic no one said a word to me. Either i was lucky or some ppl are easing up

A lot of us have given up and are just not going anywhere any more, so you all can run around maskless. So there's that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why aren't the in home providers working with him to wear a mask? If he had to wear glasses, they would work on it. I would buy a whole bunch of different types of masks.

That being said I wouldn't even notice if a 3 year old wasn't wearing a mask unless he or she looked 5. Hopefully your 3 year old isn't tall.

I’m a different poster. I have a nonverbal autistic 3 year old. Unfortunately he’s also super tall and wearing size 5 clothing. The looks I get are really bad — and I don’t even bring him on errands! This is just when we’re at a playground or pumpkin patch or other outdoor places without a mask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I’m just amazed that you don’t care that you are putting your child at risk for covid. I’m all for being a good citizen, but at the end of the day, I would be leaving my kid at home because I’m not going to risk my child getting ill. I just can’t imagine purposely exposing my child for such a stupid reason.

But the child is more at risk from the medical parent and team of therapists. A visit to the store or bank where they can stay 6+ feet away is a pretty small risk in comparison.

I’m amazed that OP is putting himself/herself at risk by going on constant errands. There is no reason to do in-person errands right now. The should be so rare as to not even trigger OP’s question. But apparently OP is planning to do errands every day for no good reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Call your bank *gasp* and communicate with them. Yes, you need to go, and possibly with your unmasked son who has been exposed,unmasked, to several health care workers in the previous time period. See if there are options for your services. Before hours, after hours - many banks offer “other” services by appointment only that will afford you service without being part of the fray. But to get them, you need to communicate.

FWIW, I did contact the bank and inquired about alternatives, since it's going to be very disruptive to pull him out of therapy to bring him to the bank during business hours. I was very clear about what I'd have to do, and they told me just to bring him along. I get that that is fine for them, but it is far from ideal for me and my child.

Similarly, I checked with the other establishments I'd be going to, who all told me this was a non-issue from their perspective.

I always knew DCUM would be on the more extreme side on this. And that's specifically why I posted here, and specifically in the regular toddler forum rather than the special needs forum. I'm trying to identify some mutually-agreeable reasonable accommodation here that would give demographic represented by the DCUM crowd some peace of mind.

But, my takeaway here is that I'll likely get snarky remarks and looks regardless of what I do. And if that's really the case, then I'm not going to bother taking some of the more extreme mitigations, like using a plastic weather shield. I see no reason to put my kid through that if it's not actually going to make you all feel better.

Well, it’s not necessarily about others feeling better. It’s about being a good member of the community and taking every precaution that you possibly can to ensure that you and your family are not a risk to others.

So it may be a non issue to establishments, but in the end, COVID is spreading in terms of paper it’s everywhere. It’s every person not doing their little part that contributes to the spread. Yea, community spread is relatively low, and brining your son is probably fine, but, well.. I guess you don’t care, OP. I can see it in your responses that you don’t care. I don’t think people have been extreme, and I think in general, people are sensitive of special needs in these cases.

So let’s be fair. You’re feeling angry and burned out, like so many people are right now. You want the answer that you want, which is that it’s fine to take your kid massless into establishments. The reality is, it’s not fine, but it’s understandable, but like you, everyone has reached their own level of burnout right now and you may receive some snark. LIKE YOU, people are tired of fighting their kids into masks, into wearing one themselves, into being home, into whatever s**t they have right now.

In any case, OP, I hope you get your errands done, and I hope you will try to mitigate any impact of the safety your community.

I'd argue that OP DOES care, or she wouldn't be posting here. She'd just be doing her errands and then some without a care in the world, like so many other people in this country are doing. If more people were making purposeful, conscious choices, we'd be in better shape overall. This area is such a bubble! There are states where you can't even get the adults to wear masks in stores- one 3yo out for the occasional errand is just not a big deal in the grand scheme of things.

Do what you have to do OP, although I agree with the suggestions to get a sitter if you can, if for no other reason than to give yourself a break. I understand it may be difficult to find a sitter for a child who is exposed to many health care professionals, but there might be someone.

Read the bolded. She literally says she doesn’t want to bother. She doesn’t care. What I don’t understand is why she doesn’t care about exposing her son to Covid so she can browse the aisles at Target instead of getting curbside pickup.

True, she doesn’t care about other people, but it’s shocking she doesn’t care about needlessly exposing her own child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I’m just amazed that you don’t care that you are putting your child at risk for covid. I’m all for being a good citizen, but at the end of the day, I would be leaving my kid at home because I’m not going to risk my child getting ill. I just can’t imagine purposely exposing my child for such a stupid reason.

But the child is more at risk from the medical parent and team of therapists. A visit to the store or bank where they can stay 6+ feet away is a pretty small risk in comparison.

.... which means the child is actually quite a large risk of spreading it to others!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would get some additional childcare so you can run errands on your own. You need a break mom!

If you have to take your unmasked son, just do it. However, even if he could wear a mask, you ought to be drastically minimizing the indoor errands you do, and not bringing kids (masked or unmasked) if at all possible. I’d be giving the side eye to any parents toting kids to the grocery store right now.

WOW. What privilege that you never have to take a child to the grocery store. And give side eye to those less fortunate than you. You’re gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get some additional childcare so you can run errands on your own. You need a break mom!

If you have to take your unmasked son, just do it. However, even if he could wear a mask, you ought to be drastically minimizing the indoor errands you do, and not bringing kids (masked or unmasked) if at all possible. I’d be giving the side eye to any parents toting kids to the grocery store right now.

WOW. What privilege that you never have to take a child to the grocery store. And give side eye to those less fortunate than you. You’re gross.

The vast majority of people who post on DCUM (including OP) can pay for groceries to be delivered, and all grocery stores are offering free pick-up. There's zero reason to have a kid in a grocery store right now, much less an unmasked kid. As OP's post demonstrates, people with kids in grocery stores are doing it right now out of selfishness and disregard, not because they really have to. I'm sure there are a few truly unavoidable situations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Call your bank *gasp* and communicate with them. Yes, you need to go, and possibly with your unmasked son who has been exposed,unmasked, to several health care workers in the previous time period. See if there are options for your services. Before hours, after hours - many banks offer “other” services by appointment only that will afford you service without being part of the fray. But to get them, you need to communicate.

FWIW, I did contact the bank and inquired about alternatives, since it's going to be very disruptive to pull him out of therapy to bring him to the bank during business hours. I was very clear about what I'd have to do, and they told me just to bring him along. I get that that is fine for them, but it is far from ideal for me and my child.

Similarly, I checked with the other establishments I'd be going to, who all told me this was a non-issue from their perspective.

I always knew DCUM would be on the more extreme side on this. And that's specifically why I posted here, and specifically in the regular toddler forum rather than the special needs forum. I'm trying to identify some mutually-agreeable reasonable accommodation here that would give demographic represented by the DCUM crowd some peace of mind.

But, my takeaway here is that I'll likely get snarky remarks and looks regardless of what I do. And if that's really the case, then I'm not going to bother taking some of the more extreme mitigations, like using a plastic weather shield. I see no reason to put my kid through that if it's not actually going to make you all feel better.

Well, it’s not necessarily about others feeling better. It’s about being a good member of the community and taking every precaution that you possibly can to ensure that you and your family are not a risk to others.

So it may be a non issue to establishments, but in the end, COVID is spreading in terms of paper it’s everywhere. It’s every person not doing their little part that contributes to the spread. Yea, community spread is relatively low, and brining your son is probably fine, but, well.. I guess you don’t care, OP. I can see it in your responses that you don’t care. I don’t think people have been extreme, and I think in general, people are sensitive of special needs in these cases.

So let’s be fair. You’re feeling angry and burned out, like so many people are right now. You want the answer that you want, which is that it’s fine to take your kid massless into establishments. The reality is, it’s not fine, but it’s understandable, but like you, everyone has reached their own level of burnout right now and you may receive some snark. LIKE YOU, people are tired of fighting their kids into masks, into wearing one themselves, into being home, into whatever s**t they have right now.

In any case, OP, I hope you get your errands done, and I hope you will try to mitigate any impact of the safety your community.

I'd argue that OP DOES care, or she wouldn't be posting here. She'd just be doing her errands and then some without a care in the world, like so many other people in this country are doing. If more people were making purposeful, conscious choices, we'd be in better shape overall. This area is such a bubble! There are states where you can't even get the adults to wear masks in stores- one 3yo out for the occasional errand is just not a big deal in the grand scheme of things.

Do what you have to do OP, although I agree with the suggestions to get a sitter if you can, if for no other reason than to give yourself a break. I understand it may be difficult to find a sitter for a child who is exposed to many health care professionals, but there might be someone.

Read the bolded. She literally says she doesn’t want to bother. She doesn’t care. What I don’t understand is why she doesn’t care about exposing her son to Covid so she can browse the aisles at Target instead of getting curbside pickup.

True, she doesn’t care about other people, but it’s shocking she doesn’t care about needlessly exposing her own child.

OP's exclusive concern was apparently to avoid being criticized, and now he/she claims they don't care about that, either. OP never cared about the ***actual risk*** posted by their unmasked child to others in the store. It's all about how other people think about OP, in the end.

[Anonymous]

I am a sahm. My husband is an essential worker. I take my kids to the grocery store in potomac village. There are plenty of other kids there too.

OP, take your child wherever you need to go. It’s 100% okay for an ASD preschooler to be maskless. If anyone has the nerve to say anything, kill them with kindness. It says more about them than you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a sahm. My husband is an essential worker. I take my kids to the grocery store in potomac village. There are plenty of other kids there too.

OP, take your child wherever you need to go. It’s 100% okay for an ASD preschooler to be maskless. If anyone has the nerve to say anything, kill them with kindness. It says more about them than you.

OP just might end up following your suggestion to the letter...