MIL hurt my dog and I want to disown her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WOW JUST WOW, I can't believe OP. the mother of her husband is less important than her dog wow

I'm not sure how you decide that her MIL is "less important." If the MIL came into the house and shot her dog, and OP got upset, would you conclude that she was less important? If not, then you agree that some behavior is unacceptable, even when it comes from someone who plays an important role in your life. I would say that MIL's behavior in this case rises to the level of being unacceptable.

Speaking for myself...if the boat tipped over, it was my in-laws or my dog and I could only save 1...it wouldn't be the in-laws!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WOW JUST WOW, I can't believe OP. the mother of her husband is less important than her dog wow

Are you a troll?? OP didn't say the dog was more important than MIL. There is a reasonable expectation for guests to not hurt your pet. If they do, they aren't invited back.

#1. I couldn't trust those kinds of people around my kids either, simply not normal behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow that's a whole lot of crazy. You, not your MIL.

You are awful, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a very lovable 4 yr old mixed rescue dog that has degenerative joint problems in her knees, hips and elbows. She's had acupuncture, laser thwrap and most recently platelet rich plasma injections to improve her mobility and quality of life until her surgeries which we have tentatively scheduled for the Fall. Mt MIL knows all about this and was given explicit instructions not to push our dog or forcefully move her for any reason. The dog just saw the orthopedic surgeon for a follow up and has been doing very well.

However, my MIL is a petulant brat with a probable undiagnosed personality disorder. At one point, she was sitting on the couch where we normally allow the dog to sit (when permitted by the vet) and our dog jumped up to sit with her. To be clear, it's the chaise part of our sectional sofa and the dog did not crowd the MIL but simply wanted to come up and cuddle. I got up as quickly as I could and very firmly stated "do not push her!", but MIL shoved her backwards off the couch, hard. My dog is now unable to put any weight on her back leg, so it obviously did damage.

My MIL then creates a big scene saying she's leaving a day early screaming at me in my home in front on my baby about how I prioritize the dog and how dare I let her lick the baby and I'm crazy with OCD for asking MIL to wash her hands before she holds my child, etc etc. I went upstairs with the baby and DH packed her up and escorted her out.

I'm livid she had the gall to hurt my dog then insult me when she's a guest in my home. I've never cared for her much, but this is the final straw in my opinion. She's a drama queen, it's her MO to make a big scene and leave at least a day early when she visits, but usually I'm not involved. DH thinks she was out of line, but things will blow over.I don know what he's said to her privately.

I'm looking for advice on next steps and a long term approach. I feel terrible that I couldn't protect my dog from this monster.

Why are you waiting until the fall to have the dog''s surgery? How does the dog jump on furniture in the dog's condition? How long have you had the dog?

[Anonymous]

The MIL made it a choice between her and the dog. She could have just stayed in the OP's house and respected the OP's house rules and her dog.

Good luck with your MIL, she sounds horrible. At least your DH supported you 100%. Not everyone is so lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry OP, I'm totally on your side and would be very sad and hurt if anyone did that to my dog.
It's your house and your rules- if the dog is allwed on your couch, nobody has the right to push the dog off. I have a dog and when guests come over the dog gets up by them and I move the dog but never ever ever would I be okay with a guest or family member pushing my dog.
One time a neice said, "OFF" and I got mad at my neice for telling my dog off. My house my rules! I know I"m in the minority, but I don't think you're crazy at all. I wouldn't disown the ML forever, but I would want an apology for sure. It doesn't sound like a sustainable relationship.

That is really disrespectful to your niece who didn't want the dog on her. She has every right to get the dog off her.

My dog wasn't on her, my dog was near her on the couch. My dog is less than 10 pounds so it's not like she's filling up all the space.

I inquired about why the dog wasn't having surgery until the fall. How can an orthopedicaly impaired teeny dog jump like that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WOW JUST WOW, I can't believe OP. the mother of her husband is less important than her dog wow

Not OP. I love my dog. I don't love my MIL. Any questions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also OP, I would let a dog lick my kid rather than germy human hands touch her. My dogs get theirs shots and pills and I know they are healthy. Human hands have all kinds of germs that are bad for their fellow humans.

I don't make a big deal of this but I can see why you'd allow the one and discourage the other (unwashed hands).

+1

same here

nasty grannie with cold sores must wash her hands. pup is free to give licks anytime.

With the same tongue the dog used to lick his ass and eat feces? No thanks...

oy. ok. we get it - you don't like dogs.

Actually, I like dogs quite a bit. I just don't humanize them or assign them qualities that don't exist

Even if a dog licks his ass and eats feces....still not a reason to hurt a pet. All MIL had to do is ask for OP to move the dog away. Not shove an already injured animal.

So people really aren't bothered when a dog's tongue goes ass to mouth on a baby?
That's just really gross...

[Anonymous]

Every word of OP's post is ridiculously over dramatic and judgey. Why am I to believe it actually happened as she said, and that the dog was truly abused by the MIL, when everything else reads like a soap opera?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every word of OP's post is ridiculously over dramatic and judgey. Why am I to believe it actually happened as she said, and that the dog was truly abused by the MIL, when everything else reads like a soap opera?

Are you the same poster who said "You probably are lying when you claim to use natural soap" on another thread? If so, you need therapy.

[Anonymous]

As a person who is afraid of dogs because I was bitten on the head by a german shepherd when I was little, I would do a lot of instinctual things if a dog were to jump near me, including pushing them away. My MIL has dogs and if I had to go over to her house, I would stay away from them. However, they would also jump on furniture that I was sitting on (and poop on them because MIL never bothered to train her dogs). MIL never got that why I did not want to cuddle with her dogs. Is your MIL afraid of dogs? If so, then what she did may be instinctual. Also, I do not like how people insist their dogs are gentle and would never hurt anyone. My MIL said that and when we took our DC over when he was a baby, one of their dogs growled at DC and tried to bite him. MIL's justification was that she has never seen that before. And before you ask, DC was not doing anything to the dog.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a person who is afraid of dogs because I was bitten on the head by a german shepherd when I was little, I would do a lot of instinctual things if a dog were to jump near me, including pushing them away. My MIL has dogs and if I had to go over to her house, I would stay away from them. However, they would also jump on furniture that I was sitting on (and poop on them because MIL never bothered to train her dogs). MIL never got that why I did not want to cuddle with her dogs. Is your MIL afraid of dogs? If so, then what she did may be instinctual. Also, I do not like how people insist their dogs are gentle and would never hurt anyone. My MIL said that and when we took our DC over when he was a baby, one of their dogs growled at DC and tried to bite him. MIL's justification was that she has never seen that before. And before you ask, DC was not doing anything to the dog.

+1 I am also nervous around dogs. Don't get why it is ok for a dog to lick my legs on a trail and the owners just smiling at me.

[Anonymous]

OP your mother in law sounds like an awful person- I also have a truly awful and difficult MIL who has done many manipulative things to come between me and my husband. She is always the victim and will do anything to create drama to pit us against each other - this has been going on for 24 years. So - seeing that we have survived this long, the one piece of advice I can give to you - if your husband wants to have a relationship,with her - is let him handle this. He is in a terrible situation and must know his mom is bat shit crazy. He needs to protect you/your dog/and your kid. He is in a tough situation, but my husband finally saw the light and he manages her. She only stayed with us 3 times in 24 years. We do see her but it is infrequent. Keeping a relationship with her was his choice - I did not make him choose between her or me, but it was up for him to deal with it and somehow it has workedand basically we are not a part of her life but he is. Not ideal - but she's happy to be away from useless that she has him to herself. Sad but true. Works for us.

[Anonymous]

You both sound nuts. Look I'm a Mom, but new Moms who insist on folks washing their hands before they (gasp) touch the baby are, in fact, OCD as well as beyond annoying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If anyone hurt my dog I would be completely done with them. What a horrible thing to do.

I agree. Peopke who are cruel to animals have mental problems. I would limit contract with grandma and not let her visit you.

Ops perpective is clearly tainted when you read all tyat she is doing to that poor dog to prolongue its misery.

I would not be surprised if MILs "push" was not a push at all but rather a typical nudge one might give any animal that jumped up on furniture to "cuddle" with someone who did not want the thing crawling on them.

So if I do it to a kid, that would be okay? I don't want that on me. Humans are animals, especially untrained children.

Holy shit of course it is OK to nudge a person away. I nudge my kids and Dh away all the time. You can only handle so many hugs. My dog, too. I don't need constant touching.