Parents of middle school girls, please...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MS teacher here. I really don't understand why so many here have a problem with the concept of a dress code. Do you want your children to learn while at school? Or do you want them to be constantly distracted by the clothing choices of the students around them? Sure, you could argue that kids shouldn't be distracted, that middle school boys shouldn't want to look at girls' bodies, etc., but they DO. And it's difficult to keep them focused on their work when girls are dressed in short shorts, sheer tops, and black bras. Ditto for the girls when a boy walks in in a muscle shirt and baggy pants below his waist.

Also, school is like a kid's job. Students need to learn what constitutes appropriate dress in public, so that they can grow up to dress appropriately in the workplace. They won't suddenly learn what is appropriate dress if they are not learning it in middle and high school.

Please, remember that schools want to teach your kids. Please help us do that by sending them to school fed, with homework done, and dressed appropriately.

Nobody here on this thread has had a problem with the concept of a dress code.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MS teacher here. I really don't understand why so many here have a problem with the concept of a dress code. Do you want your children to learn while at school? Or do you want them to be constantly distracted by the clothing choices of the students around them? Sure, you could argue that kids shouldn't be distracted, that middle school boys shouldn't want to look at girls' bodies, etc., but they DO. And it's difficult to keep them focused on their work when girls are dressed in short shorts, sheer tops, and black bras. Ditto for the girls when a boy walks in in a muscle shirt and baggy pants below his waist.

Also, school is like a kid's job. Students need to learn what constitutes appropriate dress in public, so that they can grow up to dress appropriately in the workplace. They won't suddenly learn what is appropriate dress if they are not learning it in middle and high school.

Please, remember that schools want to teach your kids. Please help us do that by sending them to school fed, with homework done, and dressed appropriately.




Nobody here on this thread has had a problem with the concept of a dress code.

Maybe you need to re-read the thread carefully. There are quite a few people on here that are not doing their part to support school dress codes. I consider this a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Maybe you need to re-read the thread carefully. There are quite a few people on here that are not doing their part to support school dress codes. I consider this a problem.

Please cite some of the posters who disagree with the concept of a school dress code.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MS teacher here. I really don't understand why so many here have a problem with the concept of a dress code. Do you want your children to learn while at school? Or do you want them to be constantly distracted by the clothing choices of the students around them? Sure, you could argue that kids shouldn't be distracted, that middle school boys shouldn't want to look at girls' bodies, etc., but they DO. And it's difficult to keep them focused on their work when girls are dressed in short shorts, sheer tops, and black bras. Ditto for the girls when a boy walks in in a muscle shirt and baggy pants below his waist.

Also, school is like a kid's job. Students need to learn what constitutes appropriate dress in public, so that they can grow up to dress appropriately in the workplace. They won't suddenly learn what is appropriate dress if they are not learning it in middle and high school.

Please, remember that schools want to teach your kids. Please help us do that by sending them to school fed, with homework done, and dressed appropriately.

Sadly most parents barely see their kids and want you the teachers, to babysit and teach them so they don't have to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see where our country is headed based on these loony responses. Let her wear a g-string to class, so long as she's comfortable!

smh

Nobody has said that.

Not exactly. But so much more importance seems to be placed on the will of the child rather than the greater good. Oh, mind your business, just listen to what the principal says! What BS.

What greater good?

How is anyone else's "greater good" served or harmed by what another person chooses to wear, exactly?

We live in a society - what other people do affects us, and what we do affects others.

But that doesn't answer the questions. In general, how do my clothing choices harm you, and how do your clothing choices harm me? Obviously there are exceptions, but in general.

I think the greatest good would be served if these girls wore burquas. In fact, maybe the girls should just stay home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see where our country is headed based on these loony responses. Let her wear a g-string to class, so long as she's comfortable!

smh

Nobody has said that.

Not exactly. But so much more importance seems to be placed on the will of the child rather than the greater good. Oh, mind your business, just listen to what the principal says! What BS.

What greater good?

How is anyone else's "greater good" served or harmed by what another person chooses to wear, exactly?

We live in a society - what other people do affects us, and what we do affects others.

But that doesn't answer the questions. In general, how do my clothing choices harm you, and how do your clothing choices harm me? Obviously there are exceptions, but in general.

I think the greatest good would be served if these girls wore burquas. In fact, maybe the girls should just stay home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see where our country is headed based on these loony responses. Let her wear a g-string to class, so long as she's comfortable!

smh

LOL, please take care to avoid Slut Shaming...it's all about comfort! Not Mom's fault if others perceive sexually suggestive/revealing attire as..sexual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see where our country is headed based on these loony responses. Let her wear a g-string to class, so long as she's comfortable!

smh

Nobody has said that.

Not exactly. But so much more importance seems to be placed on the will of the child rather than the greater good. Oh, mind your business, just listen to what the principal says! What BS.

What greater good?

How is anyone else's "greater good" served or harmed by what another person chooses to wear, exactly?

We live in a society - what other people do affects us, and what we do affects others.

But that doesn't answer the questions. In general, how do my clothing choices harm you, and how do your clothing choices harm me? Obviously there are exceptions, but in general.

I think the greatest good would be served if these girls wore burquas. In fact, maybe the girls should just stay home.

Sure. That's the logical next step after a rule prohibiting having your ass falling out of your shorts in school. That's not ridiculous fear mongering at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sure and by your logic your kid could show up naked and it's no one's business. But we live on this planet.

See above: "Sarah, Larla's clothes are her business, your clothes are your business. She picks what she likes and her parents allow, you pick what you like within what we allow. If someone is breaking rules at school that's up to the school to sort out. You just worry about you."

(Good going, PP who posted that!)

Okay. I see. Your kid doesn't have to follow the dress code rules AND you get to dictate what everyone else thinks about that. Nope. I'd say "Huh, that sounds like it's against the rules and also shows really bad judgment because she's encouraging people to notice nothing about her other thN her butt. Do you think your butt is what's important about you? Me neither. I hope Larla figures that out. Don't make fun of her. You never know what's going on in some people's lives that makes them make their choices. But I'm glad you know better." That's what real (sane) parents say.

I'm the original poster of sarah/larla. My kid does have to follow rules. And if she doesn't, the school gets to deal with that, and then I will deal with that at home. What doesn't need to happen though, is anyone else's input.

Your attitude about clothing and what you would teach your daughter is odd to me, and it's the sort of attitude my DD and I tend to try to avoid because there seems to be a lot of cultural baggage and nonsense there, but you certainly have the right to teach your child whatever you wish.

So you do tell your kid to follow the rules? Then you agree with OP. I do too, except I would equally note the boys doing the similar dumb thing. "Cultural baggage". Sure, I guess it is. Everything In A social compact is cultural baggage in a sense. I don't think it requires body shaming to say "that's not a good idea because if you do that it is the only thing people will notice about you". aND "you are way too cool to be making that the thing people notice about you". But I definitely think your way is weird, so fair enough you think mine is.

Well, I sort of agree with the OP. I agree that if there are rules they should be followed. I do not, however, agree with the dress code, with the way I have usually seen it enforced, or with the fact that even when my DD wears an outfit that is verifiable as within the dress code she has STILL experienced a school administrator and a few teachers (separate occasions over the past few years) attempt to claim her clothing was inappropriate... despite it carefully adhering to the school's published rules! That's not something I agree with.

I also do not agree with the attitude from some on this thread (not sure where you fall on this) that holds that it is somehow another student's or family's business if/whether/when a classmate gets into trouble for a violation of the rules, dress code or not, unless the violation directly impacted your student.

Of course it's their business. People judge other people based on their behavior. My 6yo judges the kid that hits everybody. That's life. Should she pretend not to notice and turn her brain off so she forms no opinions about it? Of course not. Judgment isn't wrong, you just have to teach them to be kind in their judgments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow....I can't believe some of the responses here. Lots of "parents" who don't want to take responsibility and actually teach their children appropriate dress--a sense of decorum that will help them land a job some day.

I thought most DCUMers were smarter than that. Some of you should move away to a nudist colony....you'd fit in better there than in mainstream American society. Seriously.

PP here-it's pathetic, I agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Of course it's their business. People judge other people based on their behavior. My 6yo judges the kid that hits everybody. That's life. Should she pretend not to notice and turn her brain off so she forms no opinions about it? Of course not. Judgment isn't wrong, you just have to teach them to be kind in their judgments.

I think that you're missing the distinction between "is allowed to make judgments about" and "is allowed to set rules about". Your six-year-old may judge the kid that hits everybody. That kid's behavior is still none of your kid's business, unless that kid hits your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Maybe you need to re-read the thread carefully. There are quite a few people on here that are not doing their part to support school dress codes. I consider this a problem.




Please cite some of the posters who disagree with the concept of a school dress code.

I would, if only I knew their names
Anyone on here who is arguing that it's okay for their child to wear shorts to school so short that the girl's butt is hanging out of them is not supporting local school dress codes. Why do I need to explain this to you?

To wear such clothes violates every school dress code in the DMV. So, by definition, every person who is on here suggesting that it's none of anyone else's business except the principal's if their kid is wearing such clothing is pretty much admitting to the rest of us that (1) they are sending/would send their kids to school in these clothes, despite the dress code and (2) they will continue to thumb their nose at the dress code until they hear from the principal.

[Anonymous]

Of course it's their business. People judge other people based on their behavior. My 6yo judges the kid that hits everybody. That's life. Should she pretend not to notice and turn her brain off so she forms no opinions about it? Of course not. Judgment isn't wrong, you just have to teach them to be kind in their judgments.


I think that you're missing the distinction between "is allowed to make judgments about" and "is allowed to set rules about". Your six-year-old may judge the kid that hits everybody. That kid's behavior is still none of your kid's business, unless that kid hits your kid.

If this is not an example of a poster that opposes school dress codes, I don't know what is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Of course it's their business. People judge other people based on their behavior. My 6yo judges the kid that hits everybody. That's life. Should she pretend not to notice and turn her brain off so she forms no opinions about it? Of course not. Judgment isn't wrong, you just have to teach them to be kind in their judgments.

I think that you're missing the distinction between "is allowed to make judgments about" and "is allowed to set rules about". Your six-year-old may judge the kid that hits everybody. That kid's behavior is still none of your kid's business, unless that kid hits your kid.

That makes no sense. No on is allowed to set rules except the school administrator. The rule is already set. Of course it's everybody's business if someone breaks the rules. Are you saying no one should report rule breaking? Or discuss it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MS teacher here. I really don't understand why so many here have a problem with the concept of a dress code. Do you want your children to learn while at school? Or do you want them to be constantly distracted by the clothing choices of the students around them? Sure, you could argue that kids shouldn't be distracted, that middle school boys shouldn't want to look at girls' bodies, etc., but they DO. And it's difficult to keep them focused on their work when girls are dressed in short shorts, sheer tops, and black bras. Ditto for the girls when a boy walks in in a muscle shirt and baggy pants below his waist.

Also, school is like a kid's job. Students need to learn what constitutes appropriate dress in public, so that they can grow up to dress appropriately in the workplace. They won't suddenly learn what is appropriate dress if they are not learning it in middle and high school.

Please, remember that schools want to teach your kids. Please help us do that by sending them to school fed, with homework done, and dressed appropriately.




Nobody here on this thread has had a problem with the concept of a dress code.

Maybe you need to re-read the thread carefully. There are quite a few people on here that are not doing their part to support school dress codes. I consider this a problem.

We had uniforms for both boys and girls K thru 12. No inappropriate clothing, no brand name flashing, no her clothes are better than mine shit. Problem solved. I didn't grow up in the US