Literally every single MCPS kid I know has a tutor. Do YOU?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

The benefit of being from another country and staying here is that we can pick and choose the best from each country and culture and discard the negatives. Yes, there are many negatives in the Asian system and we have discarded that, just as we have discarded the negatives of the system here.

People have spoken to the school board, I have written to the board, spoken in the PTA - and eventually accepted that in a democratic system the majority will rule. So, in this case majority has ruled but in this case it is not necessarily the right step.

I have stopped trying to change the system and have started to concentrate on the education and opportunities of my own children. I have learned to navigate the system here and made sure that my children are in the magnet programs. I have made sure that they are excelling in education, sports, and other extra-curricular activities. I have made sure that they are with a cohort of kids with similar abilities and like-minded parents.

If you are happy with what you are getting at MCPS then good for you. I am not and so I have taken matters in my own hands. I also realize that my model is not one that can be easily replicated by others because it requires parents who are vested in their kids education and can invest their time in their education. I realize that for many parents time is one commodity that they lack. Many resort to tutoring not because their kids are struggling but because they are unhappy with 1) the curriculum 2) the way material is organized 3) lack of acceleration. Tutoring, summer schools, academic camps are not necessarily for the struggling student but also for the advanced student who wants to get ahead and become competitive in the global workplace.

You are being snarky when you say that we should go back to our home country. If I do not agree with something here, I should leave? Maybe we should all leave because this land belongs to the native Americans! This conversation will require another thread.

There are many people from other countries who are here, and they are highly successful and educated people. If they are saying (based on their own experience) that something is not working in the education system - then perhaps it is beneficial for the school district to at least hear them out.

Finally, if my kid was struggling at school - maybe I would have been happy with the lower standards of 2.0 (or MCPS interpretation of 2.0) - but they are advanced student, and they have much to lose if I am not proactive. If your kids are not in the same shoes then we have nothing in common - even if you claim that you are Asian.

I'm PP. I really am Asian...really. And my DC1 is in HGC, so no, DC is not struggling or below standards. DC is advanced, but I don't need to push DC in ES level to be more advanced. I want my DC to be a kid while in ES, plus I don't want to burn out my kids this early. There will be time for that later. I know my DC will do great in years to come because I know DCs is a smart kid. I don't stress about it.

So if your child is tutored and so advanced, did your child get into magnet or HGC? Because from what you are stating, all these kids that are advanced and need tutoring to keep them at such an advanced level should really be able to get into HGC or magnet or IB or whatever with no problems, right?

My kids are taught by me. I do not know if that will be considered tutoring in the same way as OP has meant. However, no kid is doing well in school without some kind of enrichment at home and parental involvement.

Yes, they are in HGC and magnet. That is the track they have been on right from the start. They have easily got into all the possible programs (because they applied to all of the programs they were eligible for) and have been able to do the magnet program of their choice.

I would have been happy to keep them in home schools if I felt that the enrichment there was at an acceptable level. I do not feel that what HGC/magnets are offering here is out of the world. I feel that that level of education and enrichment should be the norm and be available to every one from the K - 12. However, I am not holding my breath for MCPS to do that.



Wow, it's like you're trying to out-Asian-Tiger-Mom the rest of us (yes, another Asian mom with HGC kids here). Now I'm wondering if your kids are in *my* kids' HGC classes...because you kind of scare me.

PP, I was just gonna start a new thread asking if I was the only Asian mom that did not use tutors for their kids that are in MCPS. Glad to know I am not alone. Any other Asian moms?

What is considered "enrichment" at home? Taking the kids to the library? Reading to them when they were toddlers? Letting them watch educational programs on tv or on the computer? Then, yes, I am guilty. But I feel that these things can be done by most parents as they don't really cost much money to do, just gas or bus ride to the library. I think it's when the parent starts spending huge amounts of money ($80/hr is a lot folks) for tutors that some people start going

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My kids are taught by me. I do not know if that will be considered tutoring in the same way as OP has meant. However, no kid is doing well in school without some kind of enrichment at home and parental involvement.

Yes, they are in HGC and magnet. That is the track they have been on right from the start. They have easily got into all the possible programs (because they applied to all of the programs they were eligible for) and have been able to do the magnet program of their choice.

I would have been happy to keep them in home schools if I felt that the enrichment there was at an acceptable level. I do not feel that what HGC/magnets are offering here is out of the world. I feel that that level of education and enrichment should be the norm and be available to every one from the K - 12. However, I am not holding my breath for MCPS to do that.

Wow, it's like you're trying to out-Asian-Tiger-Mom the rest of us (yes, another Asian mom with HGC kids here). Now I'm wondering if your kids are in *my* kids' HGC classes...because you kind of scare me.

Actually I am not. I am just saying what I believe in and don't know what would be the point of trying to "Out-Asian-Tiger-Mom" anybody in an anonymous forum?

I don't know what HGC your student is in, but in the HGC DC is in, no one is trying to outshine anyone else. It is the most supportive group of parents I have seen, with very socially adept and bright children.

Just curious - why would you be scared by what any other parent or student is doing? How is that affecting you? I found that a very odd statement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
PP, I was just gonna start a new thread asking if I was the only Asian mom that did not use tutors for their kids that are in MCPS. Glad to know I am not alone. Any other Asian moms?

What is considered "enrichment" at home? Taking the kids to the library? Reading to them when they were toddlers? Letting them watch educational programs on tv or on the computer? Then, yes, I am guilty. But I feel that these things can be done by most parents as they don't really cost much money to do, just gas or bus ride to the library. I think it's when the parent starts spending huge amounts of money ($80/hr is a lot folks) for tutors that some people start going

Parental involvement at home leads to enrichment of the kind you have mentioned. Yes, I consider it enrichment because these things are not available to kids from very low SES groups or parents with low educational backgrounds. The ability of a parent to sit with their child when they are doing homework and work with them to make them understand concepts, gives the student a leg-up over other students. A calm, stable home environment, a focus towards academics and extra-curricular activities, exposing children to science, art, culture, language at home - pays dividends in school.

Many parents who are getting tutors for their kids (who are not struggling academically) are doing it because 1) they may not have the time 2) they can afford it 3) they want their kids to have accelerated education 4) their kids advanced academic needs are not met by MCPS 5)they are not able to teach the subject their kid needs help in.

I am very comfortable with all subjects from k-12 (except foreign language) and have no issues teaching them anything they need help in, but I am fine if someone hires a tutor to teach their child. Seriously, there are worse ways to spend $80 an hour. Many parents spend a lot of money on getting their kids coached in sports. They send them to camps, take their children to games, buy sports paraphernalia etc. Getting your kid tutoring is akin to sending a budding athlete to a sports camp. I do not see any harm in it.

And if your kid is doing poor academically? Well, if you can get your child braces because their teeth are crooked, then get them math tutoring if fractions have completely bewildered them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My kids are taught by me. I do not know if that will be considered tutoring in the same way as OP has meant. However, no kid is doing well in school without some kind of enrichment at home and parental involvement.

Yes, they are in HGC and magnet. That is the track they have been on right from the start. They have easily got into all the possible programs (because they applied to all of the programs they were eligible for) and have been able to do the magnet program of their choice.

I would have been happy to keep them in home schools if I felt that the enrichment there was at an acceptable level. I do not feel that what HGC/magnets are offering here is out of the world. I feel that that level of education and enrichment should be the norm and be available to every one from the K - 12. However, I am not holding my breath for MCPS to do that.

Wow, it's like you're trying to out-Asian-Tiger-Mom the rest of us (yes, another Asian mom with HGC kids here). Now I'm wondering if your kids are in *my* kids' HGC classes...because you kind of scare me.

Actually I am not. I am just saying what I believe in and don't know what would be the point of trying to "Out-Asian-Tiger-Mom" anybody in an anonymous forum?

I don't know what HGC your student is in, but in the HGC DC is in, no one is trying to outshine anyone else. It is the most supportive group of parents I have seen, with very socially adept and bright children.

Just curious - why would you be scared by what any other parent or student is doing? How is that affecting you? I found that a very odd statement.

I'm not concerned about your kids or what you're doing with them. Rather, your posts have such a condescending and judgmental ring to them, I was thinking it would kind of suck if our kids were on the same birthday party or social circuit and this is what you're thinking in your head all the time about the rest of us slacker parents. I don't need that in my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

The benefit of being from another country and staying here is that we can pick and choose the best from each country and culture and discard the negatives. Yes, there are many negatives in the Asian system and we have discarded that, just as we have discarded the negatives of the system here.

People have spoken to the school board, I have written to the board, spoken in the PTA - and eventually accepted that in a democratic system the majority will rule. So, in this case majority has ruled but in this case it is not necessarily the right step.

I have stopped trying to change the system and have started to concentrate on the education and opportunities of my own children. I have learned to navigate the system here and made sure that my children are in the magnet programs. I have made sure that they are excelling in education, sports, and other extra-curricular activities. I have made sure that they are with a cohort of kids with similar abilities and like-minded parents.

If you are happy with what you are getting at MCPS then good for you. I am not and so I have taken matters in my own hands. I also realize that my model is not one that can be easily replicated by others because it requires parents who are vested in their kids education and can invest their time in their education. I realize that for many parents time is one commodity that they lack. Many resort to tutoring not because their kids are struggling but because they are unhappy with 1) the curriculum 2) the way material is organized 3) lack of acceleration. Tutoring, summer schools, academic camps are not necessarily for the struggling student but also for the advanced student who wants to get ahead and become competitive in the global workplace.

You are being snarky when you say that we should go back to our home country. If I do not agree with something here, I should leave? Maybe we should all leave because this land belongs to the native Americans! This conversation will require another thread.

There are many people from other countries who are here, and they are highly successful and educated people. If they are saying (based on their own experience) that something is not working in the education system - then perhaps it is beneficial for the school district to at least hear them out.

Finally, if my kid was struggling at school - maybe I would have been happy with the lower standards of 2.0 (or MCPS interpretation of 2.0) - but they are advanced student, and they have much to lose if I am not proactive. If your kids are not in the same shoes then we have nothing in common - even if you claim that you are Asian.

I'm PP. I really am Asian...really. And my DC1 is in HGC, so no, DC is not struggling or below standards. DC is advanced, but I don't need to push DC in ES level to be more advanced. I want my DC to be a kid while in ES, plus I don't want to burn out my kids this early. There will be time for that later. I know my DC will do great in years to come because I know DCs is a smart kid. I don't stress about it.

So if your child is tutored and so advanced, did your child get into magnet or HGC? Because from what you are stating, all these kids that are advanced and need tutoring to keep them at such an advanced level should really be able to get into HGC or magnet or IB or whatever with no problems, right?

My kids are taught by me. I do not know if that will be considered tutoring in the same way as OP has meant. However, no kid is doing well in school without some kind of enrichment at home and parental involvement.

Yes, they are in HGC and magnet. That is the track they have been on right from the start. They have easily got into all the possible programs (because they applied to all of the programs they were eligible for) and have been able to do the magnet program of their choice.

I would have been happy to keep them in home schools if I felt that the enrichment there was at an acceptable level. I do not feel that what HGC/magnets are offering here is out of the world. I feel that that level of education and enrichment should be the norm and be available to every one from the K - 12. However, I am not holding my breath for MCPS to do that.

Wow, it's like you're trying to out-Asian-Tiger-Mom the rest of us (yes, another Asian mom with HGC kids here). Now I'm wondering if your kids are in *my* kids' HGC classes...because you kind of scare me.

PP, I was just gonna start a new thread asking if I was the only Asian mom that did not use tutors for their kids that are in MCPS. Glad to know I am not alone. Any other Asian moms?

What is considered "enrichment" at home? Taking the kids to the library? Reading to them when they were toddlers? Letting them watch educational programs on tv or on the computer? Then, yes, I am guilty. But I feel that these things can be done by most parents as they don't really cost much money to do, just gas or bus ride to the library. I think it's when the parent starts spending huge amounts of money ($80/hr is a lot folks) for tutors that some people start going

Totally. I'm kind of dismayed by how Asian moms are being portrayed through posts here. Too many sound like uptight and judgmental harpies. Glad to know there are Asian moms who aren't Amy Chua wannabes but who have kids who still do well.

[Anonymous]

The kids I know in the Magnet (mine included) are in Calculas in 10th and have no need for tutors. Mine was in HGC and middle school magnet and now HS magnet. Never have helped with homework, and if they need a tutor they are in the wrong damn classes. Why do people help with homework? How's your kid going to function when they go to college? Let them do the work, it's their grade, not yours!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The kids I know in the Magnet (mine included) are in Calculas in 10th and have no need for tutors. Mine was in HGC and middle school magnet and now HS magnet. Never have helped with homework, and if they need a tutor they are in the wrong damn classes. Why do people help with homework? How's your kid going to function when they go to college? Let them do the work, it's their grade, not yours!

I guess spelling isn't that important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
PP, I was just gonna start a new thread asking if I was the only Asian mom that did not use tutors for their kids that are in MCPS. Glad to know I am not alone. Any other Asian moms?

What is considered "enrichment" at home? Taking the kids to the library? Reading to them when they were toddlers? Letting them watch educational programs on tv or on the computer? Then, yes, I am guilty. But I feel that these things can be done by most parents as they don't really cost much money to do, just gas or bus ride to the library. I think it's when the parent starts spending huge amounts of money ($80/hr is a lot folks) for tutors that some people start going

Parental involvement at home leads to enrichment of the kind you have mentioned. Yes, I consider it enrichment because these things are not available to kids from very low SES groups or parents with low educational backgrounds. The ability of a parent to sit with their child when they are doing homework and work with them to make them understand concepts, gives the student a leg-up over other students. A calm, stable home environment, a focus towards academics and extra-curricular activities, exposing children to science, art, culture, language at home - pays dividends in school.

Many parents who are getting tutors for their kids (who are not struggling academically) are doing it because 1) they may not have the time 2) they can afford it 3) they want their kids to have accelerated education 4) their kids advanced academic needs are not met by MCPS 5)they are not able to teach the subject their kid needs help in.

I am very comfortable with all subjects from k-12 (except foreign language) and have no issues teaching them anything they need help in, but I am fine if someone hires a tutor to teach their child. Seriously, there are worse ways to spend $80 an hour. Many parents spend a lot of money on getting their kids coached in sports. They send them to camps, take their children to games, buy sports paraphernalia etc. Getting your kid tutoring is akin to sending a budding athlete to a sports camp. I do not see any harm in it.

And if your kid is doing poor academically? Well, if you can get your child braces because their teeth are crooked, then get them math tutoring if fractions have completely bewildered them!

+1 good post. We do the same. Sometimes, kids just need a little more explanation or someone to work with them to understand it better. I am not help in Math or Spanish so a tutor makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Wow- cant even make a typo without people jumping all over you. For the record, never claimed to be as smart as my kid.

[Anonymous]

Totally. I'm kind of dismayed by how Asian moms are being portrayed through posts here. Too many sound like uptight and judgmental harpies. Glad to know there are Asian moms who aren't Amy Chua wannabes but who have kids who still do well.

You're the one who sounds like a judgemental harpie. In fact you just nailed the snotty tone. I get very tired of the constant cattiness toward Asian moms in particular who focus on academics over sports and dance class. As a parent it is your choice to prioritize what you see fit.

[Anonymous]

Not being snarky. What would a Math tutor do with an elementary aged child. I have a second grader who is ok at math, hovers a little above MCPS but lacks the fluency and ease he displays in other subject. He finds math exhausting. I've often wondered it a tutor for him( especially) since he isn't technically struggling, would add value

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Totally. I'm kind of dismayed by how Asian moms are being portrayed through posts here. Too many sound like uptight and judgmental harpies. Glad to know there are Asian moms who aren't Amy Chua wannabes but who have kids who still do well.

You're the one who sounds like a judgemental harpie. In fact you just nailed the snotty tone. I get very tired of the constant cattiness toward Asian moms in particular who focus on academics over sports and dance class. As a parent it is your choice to prioritize what you see fit.

Are those the choices? You don't focus on academics unless you pay for tutors? If you don't focus on academics, you focus on sports and dance classes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I'm not concerned about your kids or what you're doing with them. Rather, your posts have such a condescending and judgmental ring to them, I was thinking it would kind of suck if our kids were on the same birthday party or social circuit and this is what you're thinking in your head all the time about the rest of us slacker parents. I don't need that in my life.

Whatever. I cannot do anything about your own insecurities. If another student's achievements makes you feel that you are a slacker mom or being judged (and that too in an anonymous forum where you do not know if anything I have said it true or false) then that is your problem. BTW - how would you know what anyone is thinking about you in their own heads? You do not get out much, do you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Totally. I'm kind of dismayed by how Asian moms are being portrayed through posts here. Too many sound like uptight and judgmental harpies. Glad to know there are Asian moms who aren't Amy Chua wannabes but who have kids who still do well.

You're the one who sounds like a judgemental harpie. In fact you just nailed the snotty tone. I get very tired of the constant cattiness toward Asian moms in particular who focus on academics over sports and dance class. As a parent it is your choice to prioritize what you see fit.

Are those the choices? You don't focus on academics unless you pay for tutors? If you don't focus on academics, you focus on sports and dance classes?

No one is saying that if you do not pay for tutors then you are not focusing on academics. I do not know where you got that from. How we focus on academics, differs in each household. Some may teach their kids themselves, some may hire tutors, some may guide them to go on online resources. The point is that parental involvement in kid's education is a good thing.

I do not use tutors because I have been able to help my children myself. However, if someone uses tutors, coaching classes and camps or any other resource - why are people getting upset? No one is stopping you from doing the same for your children. And if the cost is an issue - then too bad for you. Those who can afford to spend money on their kids education are free to do so.

The point the PP was making was that parent's prioritize and spend their money on what they want for their kids. Why their individual choices should irk some people amazes me. It is not as if they are buying illegal drugs for their kids!

For some parents sports, dance, music, theater, beauty pageants etc. are important for their kids. It is their choice, their kids, their money! You and your child is not being harmed by these choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not being snarky. What would a Math tutor do with an elementary aged child. I have a second grader who is ok at math, hovers a little above MCPS but lacks the fluency and ease he displays in other subject. He finds math exhausting. I've often wondered it a tutor for him( especially) since he isn't technically struggling, would add value

Just trying to be helpful here.

If it was my child - I would first grab hold of a text book (not workbook!) and the curriculum. I would go through all the chapters in a systematic way trying to figure out where the gaps in knowledge are. I would go over concepts with him and make him practice enough problems that he understood the concepts. I would then move on the the 3rd grade textbook to see if he has really internalized those concepts and can build upon what he has learned from the 2nd grade.

I would also help him/her memorize multiplication tables and move on to long multiplications and divisions.

And if you do not have the time to do this with your child, a Math tutor could do that for you.